Dancing Fox Inn XIII- Luck Costs Extra

[Earl of Purple]

"Med scanner? Oh, dear. Yes, I am not human. I am a critter. A critter that some children like to collect and battle. Please do not tell any children that I am such a thing. I do not wish to be sucked into a ball and asked to fight other critters that were also sucked into balls. Or critters which are wild and free that will soon be sucked into balls." That only makes sense if you're familiar with pokemon. He looks down at his clothing. "What is wrong with how I am dressed?"

[billtodamax]

Children collect and battle you. Nigel says slowly. Do they... do they know you're sentient? Is it like... any animal? Has this guy had to fight a bear. Oh god can children just... tame bears? That's an elf thing right. Sorry, sorry I'll get back to the clothes thing but... what?

[Earl of Purple]

"We cannot talk, and many of us behave as animals do. Or plants, or rocks, depending. It is only one particular type of critter, which come in many forms." This is potentially more questions. "We are found often in PokéPark. Rarely elsewhere, however. Now, what is wrong with my clothing?"

[billtodamax]

Nigel is overflowing with questions, yes. What on earth does he mean by critter. Are they mammals? Lizards? ...Fungus? Probably a lot of smart biology questions too but I'm not a doctor! Besides, he'd feel bad if he didn't at least help this guy out with his clothes before interrogating him. Uh, ok... ok um... first up lose the hat, most people don't wear hats and you probably wouldn't pick one that fits your outfit. Your jeans are way too long for you, and your t-shirt is inside out, I think. Nigel looks him up and down. Oh, and your laces should be the same colour. Black would be better but as long as they're the same. An idea occurs. Do you have like... money, or anything? I can probably spot you a change of clothes, jf jt'll stop uh... children from... imprisoning you? Sure, why not.

[Earl of Purple]

The hat disappears, sucked into David's head, as his jeans shorten and the laces of his shoes change to yellow ones. David likes yellow better than black, and they still match, right? Meanwhile, the t-shirt itself changes, losing the seams on the edges and the design becomes clearer and reverses. It's a slogan! 'Always be yourself. Unless you can be a pokémon. Then always be a pokémon.'

That's why he's wearing weird flesh-clothes, Nigel. They're part of his human disguise.

"Money? No, I don't believe I have money. What is money?" Humanity has a lot more advanced and confusing concepts than pokémon do. David's trying, but this is his first try at it. He'll get better. Hopefully.

[Mee]

Lynx nods. "Or, at the very least, you can attempt to convince him there are none here. Though, it seems like you've already done that."

"Yeah, of course. I'm happy to try to help.
I'm not always good at talking people out of things; but I will absolutely try." Kin says, nodding yet again, and ordering another drink.
"You want some food or a drink or anything?"

[billtodamax]

Oh, wow ok gosh. Nigel says, grimacing as the man in front of him starts acting gross and weird. Uh... more weird, I guess. He glances around the bar to see if anyone noticed. Try not to ever do that where people can see you, holy hell. Money's um... It's money. Nigel hasn't really put much thought toward it. Money's something you give to someone in exchange for things or tasks. Sure, whatever, good enough.

[Earl of Purple]

"Is that not how humans change clothes?" No, David, it isn't. There's a difference between human clothes and human skins, a difference you have totally and utterly failed to notice. "So... I give money to get a drink here? And then... I have no money. So I need more money, so I... Do... I don't know what I do. How do I get money?"

[CosmicHobbit]

"Yeah, of course. I'm happy to try to help.
I'm not always good at talking people out of things; but I will absolutely try." Kin says, nodding yet again, and ordering another drink.
"You want some food or a drink or anything?"

Lynx nods, saying, "I do, but don't worry, I have enough money to get my own." He quickly orders fish and a beer. "On to less intense and dark topics, what do you do to get money?" Lynx has apparently forgotten the word for job.

[billtodamax]

Well I work at a hospital. Nigel explains, just putting the whole clothes thing on a backburner for now. In exchange for performing surgeries and the occasional assistance with the virology department they give me money. You uh... Oh gosh what job could this guy do. You'd have to find something that suits you. Nigel that's a cop out.

[Earl of Purple]

"Could I... Work... at a hospital?" David hasn't understood a lot of those words. The answer's probably no, but he could maybe work as a janitor?

Or he could be persuaded to work as a therapy pet, but that would require him to not be human any more.

[billtodamax]

...Not as a doctor. Nigel says, frowning. How was he going to get out of working with this weird animal at his hospital. Most people go to school first to learn the skills they need to work. He tells "David". Maybe you could do a night class or something? Learn how to uh... entertain the kids, or something. He'd probably make a pretty good clown.

[Earl of Purple]

"School is where children learn how to capture me. And I do not wish to entertain baby goats." David, Nigel's explained that already! Please try to remember things like that. "What skills are required for work? I fear I do not know. Would flying help? I can fly. Not like this. But I can fly." Shapeshifters cheat a lot when it comes to getting around. And David could possibly get away without using money by pretending to be Nigel, going to his favourite restaurant and putting it on a tab.

[billtodamax]

It uh... jeez it depends. Nigel says lamely. Look there's this charity set up in an old campground you could visit. I think they're called glug? Nigel hasn't been here long. Cut him some slack. They might be able to help you? He offers. Like I can cover your drink, buy you a room for tonight if you need it, but... he trails off. Nigel has other things to do David.

[Earl of Purple]

"Thank you, friend Nigel! I shall go to this glug and ask for some assistance. I hope I encounter you again." With that, Nigel tries to get off the stool, gets his leg caught on the foot-rest and falls to the floor. He doesn't get his arms out to catch himself, so he hits the floor pretty much head first. When he lands, his whole body ripples and distorts and compacts, two metal spheres- one blue and white, the other red and white- being ejected from his body. When the transformation is complete, David is a small blob of pink clay-like goo, with a crude face that looks like it was sculpted into the clay.

Exactly where all the other matter that made up David's body went is unclear.

[Mee]

Lynx nods, saying, "I do, but don't worry, I have enough money to get my own." He quickly orders fish and a beer. "On to less intense and dark topics, what do you do to get money?" Lynx has apparently forgotten the word for job.

"Oh, uh." Quick, how to put this in a non-intense way? "Well. Kind of between jobs at the moment. Used to be in a fairly large group of organized, like minded individuals, who were called on for contract work in order to help solve problems."

[CosmicHobbit]

"Oh, uh." Quick, how to put this in a non-intense way? "Well. Kind of between jobs at the moment. Used to be in a fairly large group of organized, like minded individuals, who were called on for contract work in order to help solve problems."

Lynx takes a drink. "So you were a mercenary, but now you're unemployed." He nods. "I get it. No judgement here. I'm an adventurer. Or, I try to be. Normally that just means I get recruited to kill possessed skeletons or some **** like that, which makes Bob happy."

[billtodamax]

Nigel's eye lights up immediately as he tries to take in David's... condition. Jesus H. Christ! He also panics, trying to scoop up the orbs and the pink... thing. Person? Are you... ok? He asks, glancing around the Inn. Oh god what if these are important. He says to himself, worriedly looking at the orbs.

[Earl of Purple]

"Ditto?" Is the reply to the question. The orbs are... Well, they're orbs. They've got buttons on, and they're surprisingly heavy. David- the pink blob- looks up at Nigel, its simple face unable to express its emotions, but it does try to wave back at its stool.

[billtodamax]

Ok, uh, responsive, good. He spots the motions David makes. Right, sure. Sure sure sure. He places David gently back down on his stool, letting the orbs rest on the bar. Clearly not important to keeping David alive, that's the important thing. Is this... normal? Does this happen a lot? He asks the... blob.

[Earl of Purple]

"Ditto!" Is David's immediate response. When the pokemon is placed back on the stool, it morphs and changes back into David, expanding and filling itself out to produce a fully accurate mimicked human, although there are slight differences- David is now slightly shorter, stouter about the middle and his colouration is a shade or two away from it was before the accident. "No, that doesn't happen often. I am still... Getting used to this shape. The fall surprised me and I briefly forgot what David looks like. It is tricky to pretend to be something you cannot visualise. Especially if you are mimicking something that does not actually exist." 'David' is an amalgamation of various individuals the ditto has seen, and not a real individual. "That is what I normally look like. All I can say in that shape is 'ditto', which is what the children call those like me."

David will pick the orbs up and put them in his pockets, which shouldn't work- they're too big, and his 'pockets' aren't really pockets at all but more akin to a kangaroo's pouch, since David owns no clothes. There's also no bulge, as he shifts his shape around them to move them back into his torso.

[Mee]

Lynx takes a drink. "So you were a mercenary, but now you're unemployed." He nods. "I get it. No judgement here. I'm an adventurer. Or, I try to be. Normally that just means I get recruited to kill possessed skeletons or some **** like that, which makes Bob happy."

Kin nods a few times, slowly.
"Yup. That is pretty accurate.
One of the best in the business. Went into the scorching deserts with nothing but a cardboard box. 'Arm up on sight' they said." She scoffs. "Never knew I was there.

Anyway. I dunno, with that weapon? Skeletons seem a bit . . . under par. Seems like he's pretty strong. And you gotta be too, toting him around and still maintaining your sense of self, with a weapon like that. I hear they can do weird things after even short amounts of time, and you said you've had him a while?"

[CosmicHobbit]

Kin nods a few times, slowly.
"Yup. That is pretty accurate.
One of the best in the business. Went into the scorching deserts with nothing but a cardboard box. 'Arm up on sight' they said." She scoffs. "Never knew I was there.

Anyway. I dunno, with that weapon? Skeletons seem a bit . . . under par. Seems like he's pretty strong. And you gotta be too, toting him around and still maintaining your sense of self, with a weapon like that. I hear they can do weird things after even short amounts of time, and you said you've had him a while?"

Lynx smirks. "I'm gonna guess you got paid pretty well with those skills. Why'd you stop?"

He snorts a little bit. "Strong is right. But I, personally, can only do so much. As for maintaining my sense of self, and it doing weird things...I don't know. I keep feeling like he doesn't wanna crush me or my spirit. Almost as if he, I dunno, feels like he has to protect me. Either way, probably not my doing."

[billtodamax]

"Ditto!" Is David's immediate response. When the pokemon is placed back on the stool, it morphs and changes back into David, expanding and filling itself out to produce a fully accurate mimicked human, although there are slight differences- David is now slightly shorter, stouter about the middle and his colouration is a shade or two away from it was before the accident. "No, that doesn't happen often. I am still... Getting used to this shape. The fall surprised me and I briefly forgot what David looks like. It is tricky to pretend to be something you cannot visualise. Especially if you are mimicking something that does not actually exist." 'David' is an amalgamation of various individuals the ditto has seen, and not a real individual. "That is what I normally look like. All I can say in that shape is 'ditto', which is what the children call those like me."

David will pick the orbs up and put them in his pockets, which shouldn't work- they're too big, and his 'pockets' aren't really pockets at all but more akin to a kangaroo's pouch, since David owns no clothes. There's also no bulge, as he shifts his shape around them to move them back into his torso.

Sure, why not, he's named after the noise he makes. Definitely not the weirdest thing here. And the um... orbs? Nigel says, motioning vaguely. They've been sucked back up so he can't motion to them like he wants to but he's already committed to waving his arms around. Do they help with the changing or...

[Earl of Purple]

"I cannot be trapped by a child if I am already bound to a sphere. One of those spheres is the one to which I'm bound, the other is... A spare." Now, that's a lie, and David's still not great at those. "Anyway, I should go to Glug." He'll try to get up and walk away now, carefully to avoid falling over again. That'd just be perfect, falling over and losing his shape again.

[billtodamax]

Sure, a spare, why not. Nigel says, motioning to the bartender to get himself another drink. Good luck at uh... Glug. He says to David as the ditto leaves.

[Mee]

Lynx smirks. "I'm gonna guess you got paid pretty well with those skills. Why'd you stop?"

He snorts a little bit. "Strong is right. But I, personally, can only do so much. As for maintaining my sense of self, and it doing weird things...I don't know. I keep feeling like he doesn't wanna crush me or my spirit. Almost as if he, I dunno, feels like he has to protect me. Either way, probably not my doing."

Kin shrugs.
"Our base got attacked. Everyone got scattered. Took that as a sign to maybe just get out of the business while the getting was good.

Hmmmmmm." She turns to look at him fully, head tilting to one side.
"Well, really, that sounds pretty good. Basically, from what I gather about these situations, the best case scenario. That's pretty good. I'm happy for you both."

[CosmicHobbit]

Kin shrugs.
"Our base got attacked. Everyone got scattered. Took that as a sign to maybe just get out of the business while the getting was good.

Hmmmmmm." She turns to look at him fully, head tilting to one side.
"Well, really, that sounds pretty good. Basically, from what I gather about these situations, the best case scenario. That's pretty good. I'm happy for you both."

Lynx nods. "Yeah, gotta know when not to push it."

Lynx raises an eyebrow and says, "I guess. I just worry that one day he'll stop being so nice..." He goes silent for a moment before gasping and standing up, knocking over his chair.

"I have an idea!" He turns to Kin and says, "How about you and me go do some sort of quest! Clear out a crypt, or hunt down some creatures in the sewers! You get to relive the mercenary days, Bob is happy because we're killing 'abominations', and I get some fun! Plus, we can split any loot we find! What do you say?"

[Mee]

Lynx nods. "Yeah, gotta know when not to push it."

Lynx raises an eyebrow and says, "I guess. I just worry that one day he'll stop being so nice..." He goes silent for a moment before gasping and standing up, knocking over his chair.

"I have an idea!" He turns to Kin and says, "How about you and me go do some sort of quest! Clear out a crypt, or hunt down some creatures in the sewers! You get to relive the mercenary days, Bob is happy because we're killing 'abominations', and I get some fun! Plus, we can split any loot we find! What do you say?"

Kin blinks a few times.
"That does sound fun. But riiiight now I'm not sure I can commit to that."
(And by that, she means I cannot. >_> My posting rate is suuuuper bad right now, and I wouldn't be able to post reliably at all.)
"Sorry."

(Especially since it ate this post a few times and asfdasdfasd)

[CosmicHobbit]

Kin blinks a few times.
"That does sound fun. But riiiight now I'm not sure I can commit to that."
(And by that, she means I cannot. >_> My posting rate is suuuuper bad right now, and I wouldn't be able to post reliably at all.)
"Sorry."

(Especially since it ate this post a few times and asfdasdfasd)

Putting the chair back up, Lynx says, "Ah. Yeah, this kind of thing does take quite a while." He grabs his drink and finishes it before putting on his hat and grabbing his cane once more. "I'll just find someone else. It's all good." He produces a small paper from his suit pocket and puts it down on the table. "If you can ever commit, and are ready for fame, fortune, and memories, call the number there."
(By this he means direct message me if you ever can and want to do an adventure with Lynx)
He blinks, and his eyes are now red, with slit pupils. "It was nice to meet you Kin. I apologize for Zaphiel's sudden leaving, he gets very excited about this kind of thing. Goodbye." Another blink, and his eyes are back to normal. "Aaaand I suppose Bob just said bye. As will I. Seeya!" He waits for anything that Kin has left to say before he goes off, probably to spraypaint an advertisement on The Wall.