The Order of the Stick: Utterly Dwarfed
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  1. - Top - End - #361
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    You get Ron Weasley's wand from 'Chamber of Secrets'. The one that broke. This should be interesting...

    I wish for a cookie.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  2. - Top - End - #362
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    Crisis21's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    You get a jelly-bean cookie. The jelly beans are vomit-flavored.



    I wish people would stop using bertie bott's every flavor beans to prank others with.
    Wind & Sound Elemental Eric Greenhilt avatar by Akrim.elf
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  3. - Top - End - #363
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Imp

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Bertie Botts is somehow bought by Jelly Belly, which continues to create the entire Bertie Botts line under the Jelly Belly brand, so technically people are no longer pranking others with Bertie Botts.

    I wish we all lived on a yellow submarine.
    This is a boring signature.
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES
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    EXPLOSIVE RUNES

  4. - Top - End - #364
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Caerulea's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    The entirety of the earths population is now moved onto a yellow submarine. It is quite crowded, and food supplies are limited.

    I wish my knife was legal, rather than questionably legal.
    Non caerulea sum, Caerulea nomen meus est.
    Extended Signature.
    I'm not not a humanoid. Come not not be one too.

  5. - Top - End - #365
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    bc56's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Now everyone has knives legally.
    Including serial killers.
    The number of deaths by stabbing is on the rise.

    Oh crud.
    I wish I hadn't granted that wish.
    Awesome avatar (Kothar, paladin of Tlacua) by Linkele!

    Quote Originally Posted by William Shakespeare, King Lear, IV.i.46
    'Tis the time's plague, when madmen lead the blind.
    My Nexus characters

  6. - Top - End - #366
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Now nobody has knives. Even people who only want to put butter on their bread.

    I wish to desecrate my uncle's grave.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  7. - Top - End - #367
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Congratulations on your new vampiric uncle. He's, ah, not quite how you remember him, though...

    I wish to survive the ensuing vampire apocalypse.
    Last edited by Ironsmith; 2019-03-08 at 12:53 PM.
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.

    [+]

  8. - Top - End - #368
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    Caerulea's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    I guess we could always use a food source.

    I wish for my electric teakettle to be quieter.
    Non caerulea sum, Caerulea nomen meus est.
    Extended Signature.
    I'm not not a humanoid. Come not not be one too.

  9. - Top - End - #369
    Barbarian in the Playground
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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Quote Originally Posted by Caerulea View Post
    I wish for my electric teakettle to be quieter.
    It gets quieter because there's no sound in space and the whole earth is turned into a vacuum devoid of oxygen.

    I wish for a good book to read.

  10. - Top - End - #370
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Here you go. It's flying toward your face at supersonic speeds, so is it technically an audiobook, or...?

    Ooh.

    I wish I was a qualified brain surgeon.
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.

    [+]

  11. - Top - End - #371
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Caerulea's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    You receive a valid certificate. Your knowledge and experience do not increase.

    I wish for a sword in my hand, at no velocity relative to myself.
    Non caerulea sum, Caerulea nomen meus est.
    Extended Signature.
    I'm not not a humanoid. Come not not be one too.

  12. - Top - End - #372
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Imp

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Granted, though the pointy side is in your hand, pointing towards the ground, and it's very heavy, and gravity is pulling that blade towards the ground and your foot. How's your reflex save again?

    I wish I were invisible to ninjas.
    This is a boring signature.
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES
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    EXPLOSIVE RUNES

  13. - Top - End - #373
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    Crisis21's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    You are invisible to ninjas, and only ninjas. Your clothes are perfectly visible to everyone.


    I wish I was invincible, unbreakable, unstoppable.

    @V: So you're saying I stop at the core? That violates the terms of the Wish. The whole 'being in pain' thing violates the invincibility clause too.
    @@V: Except pain is caused by damage. Sometimes small amounts, but still damage.
    Last edited by Crisis21; 2019-03-08 at 09:55 AM.
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  14. - Top - End - #374
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Unfortunately for you, that means the earth's crust doesn't stop you from falling to the core, where you aren't going to melt but will be in an extreme amount of pain.

    I wish for a bike.

    ^Oh, you aren't stopped, exactly, at least not in the conventional sense, as nothing is actually surviving getting in your way (magma just rolls around you, and solid objects break), you're just pulled there in perpetuity with no means of catching yourself. As for invincibility... that just means you can't suffer any damage. Your pain receptors going off when exposed to extreme heat, however, is them working exactly as intended; thus, not damaged.
    Last edited by Ironsmith; 2019-03-08 at 02:55 AM.
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.

    [+]

  15. - Top - End - #375
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    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    ^^In fairness, the alternative - hurdling through space in a straight line for eternity, unable even to stop yourself - is not much better. Plus invincibility doesn't work against suffocation in most rulesets.

    You want to ride your bicycle~ You want to ride your bike~ You want to ride your bicycle~ You want to-
    Oh.
    Oh dear.
    Spoiler: I'm so sorry.
    Show


    I wish for the ability to stitch dismembered patients back together and revive/reanimate them.
    Last edited by Dr.Gunsforhands; 2019-03-08 at 02:49 AM.
    Leo, Ajax, Deshy, Cutty, Erica.
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  16. - Top - End - #376
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Oh, good gracious. You really want to go down that road? This ain't gonna be pretty, Doctor Frankenstein. But I won't judge as your patients revive as monstrosities beyond imagining, each crying out in agony at what you have made them into. I won't be judging as they demand vengeance against you and rise up to utterly destroy you. I won't have time to judge, because...

    I wish to be elsewhere when it hits the fan for our mad scientist friend.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  17. - Top - End - #377
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Literal hell is elsewhere, yes?

    I wish for a door to... wait, no, no, that's gonna go bad, I'm not gonna even try to rescue you, sorry.
    Instead, I just want a deck of cards.
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.

    [+]

  18. - Top - End - #378
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Gee, thanks; it's good to know you care.

    The cards are so tiny that you can't shuffle them, much less read which card is which. You think you've got a full house? You've got a pair of twos. I wouldn't try playing poker with those babies. Mighty adorable, though, aren't they? I mean, if you look through a magnifying glass.

    I wish to be rescued from Hell.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  19. - Top - End - #379
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Crisis21's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    You are transferred to Heck where you are forced to watch Teletubbies reruns for eternity.



    I wish to secure my place in Heaven.
    Wind & Sound Elemental Eric Greenhilt avatar by Akrim.elf
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  20. - Top - End - #380
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    While fulfilling in its own way, I'm sure you probably didn't expect to spend eternity as the janitor who cleans up after all the wild parties.

    Although now you've given me an idea...

    I wish for CyberiadQueen and Crisis21 to switch places, then for Crisis21 to be transported to a random location within five feet of CyberiadQueen, yet external to her. (Can't wait to see how this goes wrong...)
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.

    [+]

  21. - Top - End - #381
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    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Unlike Mister F, I've actually been dealing with my patients rather than pretending they didn't happen and throwing them into the wilderness, which... well, okay, it only moderately helped, and then only sometimes. Anyway, I wound up with some extra feet and sent them to CQ as a revenge prank. Combined with the weird teleportation request, I'm pretty sure that gives us Crisis21 walking a mile in seven shoes, CyberiadQueen on celestial sanitation duty, and Ironsmith watching a 'tubbies marathon on the Satellite of Love.

    ...hm? You didn't wish for that last one? That's okay. You can have it for free.

    I wish to send him cheesy movies, the worst I can find, and make him sit and watch them all while I monitor his mind.
    Last edited by Dr.Gunsforhands; 2019-03-08 at 08:00 PM.
    Leo, Ajax, Deshy, Cutty, Erica.
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  22. - Top - End - #382
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Instead, you stream all of his favorite movies directly into his brain.

    I wish to be in the wilderness, leaving all these loonies to manage for themselves.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  23. - Top - End - #383
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Caerulea's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Have fun being lost in Mirkwood.

    I wish to have a mansion on a moor somewhere.
    Non caerulea sum, Caerulea nomen meus est.
    Extended Signature.
    I'm not not a humanoid. Come not not be one too.

  24. - Top - End - #384
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Crisis21's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Granted. The ground the mansion is built on isn't very stable though, so it sinks into the moor... with you in it.

    Quote Originally Posted by Dr.Gunsforhands View Post
    I wish to send him cheesy movies, the worst I can find, and make him sit and watch them all while I monitor his mind.
    Since CyberiadQueen seems to have mistaken this for the 'Rolled a 1' thread, I'll take this wish too. Dr. GundForHands, you are the bumbling and often abused assistant of Mad Scientist CyberiadQueen. She makes you send the horrible movies she has selected up to Ironsmith on the Sattelite of Love.


    I wish Ironsmith had some robot friends to help him keep his sanity.
    Wind & Sound Elemental Eric Greenhilt avatar by Akrim.elf
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  25. - Top - End - #385
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Caerulea's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    He gets Marvin, the depressed suicidal robot.

    I'd like a True Neutral cat.
    Non caerulea sum, Caerulea nomen meus est.
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    I'm not not a humanoid. Come not not be one too.

  26. - Top - End - #386
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    ...Okay, look, man. I know this is a wishing thread, but what you're asking for is a physical impossibility, the kind that causes universal implosions, so if you really want to no longer ex-

    Oh goddammit.

    ...Well, at least those cheesy films you were torturing me with don't exist anymore.

    I wish to rewind time to when Caerulea made that wish, and then prevent it.
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.

    [+]

  27. - Top - End - #387
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Quote Originally Posted by Crisis21 View Post
    Since CyberiadQueen seems to have mistaken this for the 'Rolled a 1' thread, I'll take this wish too.
    It's been a long ol' day. I'm really tired.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ironsmith View Post
    I wish to rewind time to when Caerulea made that wish, and then prevent it.
    Okay; you got it. Time is rewound far enough for you to undo Caerulea's wish. Pity that you didn't also request the ability to start time up again. Upshot is, the entirety of Time has just had the Pause button hit on it.

    I wish to unpause Time.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  28. - Top - End - #388
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Ironsmith's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    .timmaddoG .sdrawkcab gniyalp s'ti dnA...

    I wish to move time forward again.
    Who're you? ...Don't matter.

    Want some rye? 'Course ya do!


    Here's to us.
    Who's like us?
    Damn few,
    and they're aaall dead.

    [+]

  29. - Top - End - #389
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    Crisis21's Avatar

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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Quote Originally Posted by CyberiadQueen View Post
    It's been a long ol' day. I'm really tired.
    I've had days like that.

    Quote Originally Posted by Ironsmith View Post
    I wish to move time forward again.
    Sure thing. See this crank here? Time will move forwards so long as you're turning it.

    No, no, not so long as someone is turning it, so long as you are turning it.

    Don't worry, while turning the crank, you won't suffer from things like hunger, exhaustion, or age.

    You will suffer from boredom though.



    I wish to install a TV Ironsmith can watch while turning the crank.
    Wind & Sound Elemental Eric Greenhilt avatar by Akrim.elf
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  30. - Top - End - #390
    Barbarian in the Playground
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    Default Re: Corrupt a Wish II

    Quote Originally Posted by Crisis21 View Post
    I wish to install a TV Ironsmith can watch while turning the crank.
    Okay if "TV" stands for "Terribly Violent," and the "Terribly Violent" happens to you. That is to say something terribly violent happens to you. That makes sense right?

    I wish the next time I post in a Message Board Game I don't have to rely on such a rigmarole stretch.

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