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    Default Awful Monster Names

    I was prompted here to make this thread after commenting on how terribly named the Bonedrinker is. Another terrible name is Deathshrieker, because that is the only monster that shrieks and is undead amirite? The names can be bad for any reason (impossible to pronounce, impossible to remember, impossible to spell, unrelated to their ability, generalized, unimaginative, cliche, etc.), but rather than me carrying on, how about other people give some shout outs to the worst-named monsters out there? I'll chime in later if no one hits some of the ones that come to my mind.
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    are you asking us to do research into a setting you wrote yourself?
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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    From Fiendish Folio: Octopus Tree. Yes, that is basically what it is; even so, it is a somewhat intelligent Plant with a bevy of SLAs to complement the expected direct combat/defensive abilities of a Plant monster. It has a reputation for seeking out shipping lanes to prey upon, and handily destroying entire ships to feed on the crew, gaining a legendary reputation for being stupidly hard to kill and employing their abilities to the fullest; making them far more dangerous than roving predators.

    What do we get for such a fearsome creature? Octopus Tree.
    Last edited by ViperMagnum357; 2018-05-18 at 11:26 PM.

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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    Quote Originally Posted by Mike Miller View Post
    I was prompted here to make this thread after commenting on how terribly named the Bonedrinker is. Another terrible name is Deathshrieker, because that is the only monster that shrieks and is undead amirite? The names can be bad for any reason (impossible to pronounce, impossible to remember, impossible to spell, unrelated to their ability, generalized, unimaginative, cliche, etc.), but rather than me carrying on, how about other people give some shout outs to the worst-named monsters out there? I'll chime in later if no one hits some of the ones that come to my mind.
    This is a great concept for a thread.

    I'll give you one that checks off the first four of your example traits: xph's phthisic

    it's a great shape for any kind of shapeshifting magic that lets you get its mind feed ability. int damage is pretty hard to come by if you don't already have access to ray of stupidity

    this monster's keyboard smash of a name is etymological gibberish, so is impossible to pronounce, remember, or spill, and has nothing to do with its powers.
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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    Off the top of my head, I'm gonna go with the Clockroach.

    just... No.

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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    The Garngrath. Less so a monster, and more so a name picked out of a random fantasy name generator.

    Good monster and definitely a worth while CR 20 monster for a group of players just venturing up to level 20, without too much min/maxing. Clocking in a decent AC, an inherent miss chance, decent saves, SR 33, Plane Shift for its self so it can be a recurring threat if you'd like, and DR 15/epic.
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    Obligatory duckbunny.
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    Stench Kow (plural Stench Kine)
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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    Quote Originally Posted by mabriss lethe View Post
    Off the top of my head, I'm gonna go with the Clockroach.

    just... No.
    I don't know what you're talking about. That's genius. I only wish that I came up with it first.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Venger View Post
    This is a great concept for a thread.

    I'll give you one that checks off the first four of your example traits: xph's phthisic

    it's a great shape for any kind of shapeshifting magic that lets you get its mind feed ability. int damage is pretty hard to come by if you don't already have access to ray of stupidity

    this monster's keyboard smash of a name is etymological gibberish, so is impossible to pronounce, remember, or spill, and has nothing to do with its powers.
    how is it etymological gibberish?
    it looks like its based on the word phthisis,
    http://www.dictionary.com/browse/phthisis?s=t

    which at the very least gives you a pronunciation
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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    I got one that is awful for reasons other that those mentioned thus far.

    From Fiend Folio, I give you the one, the only... Living Holocaust.

    It's Evil, it burns you to death and it has a gaseous body, because of course it does...
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    Quote Originally Posted by zlefin View Post
    how is it etymological gibberish?
    it looks like its based on the word phthisis,
    http://www.dictionary.com/browse/phthisis?s=t

    which at the very least gives you a pronunciation
    The etymology is related to tuberculosis, which has nothing to do with this monster at all. I think we can agree that the pronunciation of the word is difficult and unpleasant.

    I'll see the octopus tree and raise Expedition to the Demonweb Pit's Elder Viper Tree. It's a tree where the branches are snakes. Because it's eeeeeeevil.
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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    Ooh I have know a lot of these...

    Bugbear: A brutish goblinoid which has no association with bugs or bears.

    Crawling Claw: It’s makes sense as the name for a severed hand animated by necromancy, but is terribly uncreative

    Dragon Turtle: It’s a gargantuan turtle that can eat ships whole and breathes out steam. What else did you expect?

    Drider: This is kind of like a spider centaur; a drow whose legs is replaced by a giant spider body but it’s upper half remains drow. The name is literally just a portmanteau of “drow” and “spider”.

    Flameskull: It’s a giant flying skull that’s on fire. Suiting, but horribly uncreative.

    Gorgon: This would make sense if I was describing a Medusa or the ones from Greek mythology, but in the Monster Manual it is the name of an iron bull which spews out poisonous gas. For some reason WotC stole name of a famous mythological creature to describe an entirely different creature which has no association to the creature the original name was of.

    Lycanthropes: Literally means “wolf man”, but the thing is that 4 out of 5 of the “lycanthropes” are other were animals which aren’t wolf based.

    Purple Worm: Because everyone could perfectly be able to tell that this is the name of CR 15 monster which is larger than a house, right?

    Roc: It sounds like it should be describing a rock monster, but this is actually the name of a giant flying bird which can carry away elephants.

    Salamander: When I think salamander, I think of little amphibians, not human sized elemental made of pure fire which have nothing to do with actual salamanders.
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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    Quote Originally Posted by Requilac View Post
    Roc: It sounds like it should be describing a rock monster, but this is actually the name of a giant flying bird which can carry away elephants.
    Rocs are described in Sinbad the Sailor, and I think the movie based off of it shows a Roc. Unlike the gorgons you mentioned earlier, which are frustrating.

    Shape of Fire, from the epic level handbook... When did the Wonder Twins become epic level monsters?

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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    Quote Originally Posted by Requilac View Post
    Ooh I have know a lot of these...

    Bugbear: A brutish goblinoid which has no association with bugs or bears.

    Crawling Claw: It’s makes sense as the name for a severed hand animated by necromancy, but is terribly uncreative

    Dragon Turtle: It’s a gargantuan turtle that can eat ships whole and breathes out steam. What else did you expect?

    Drider: This is kind of like a spider centaur; a drow whose legs is replaced by a giant spider body but it’s upper half remains drow. The name is literally just a portmanteau of “drow” and “spider”.

    Flameskull: It’s a giant flying skull that’s on fire. Suiting, but horribly uncreative.

    Gorgon: This would make sense if I was describing a Medusa or the ones from Greek mythology, but in the Monster Manual it is the name of an iron bull which spews out poisonous gas. For some reason WotC stole name of a famous mythological creature to describe an entirely different creature which has no association to the creature the original name was of.

    Lycanthropes: Literally means “wolf man”, but the thing is that 4 out of 5 of the “lycanthropes” are other were animals which aren’t wolf based.

    Purple Worm: Because everyone could perfectly be able to tell that this is the name of CR 15 monster which is larger than a house, right?

    Roc: It sounds like it should be describing a rock monster, but this is actually the name of a giant flying bird which can carry away elephants.

    Salamander: When I think salamander, I think of little amphibians, not human sized elemental made of pure fire which have nothing to do with actual salamanders.
    Bugbears, Dragon Turtles, Rocs, and Salamanders are all mythological creatures.

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    Bugbear in the Playground
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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    Same with gorgons. There's the medusa-like gorgon, but there's also the iron cow, same origin as the catablepas in MMII. Basically exaggerations of wildebeests.

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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    Quote Originally Posted by Sto View Post
    Rocs are described in Sinbad the Sailor, and I think the movie based off of it shows a Roc. Unlike the gorgons you mentioned earlier, which are frustrating.
    Quote Originally Posted by almondsAndRain View Post
    Bugbears, Dragon Turtles, Rocs, and Salamanders are all mythological creatures.
    Quote Originally Posted by DrMotives View Post
    Same with gorgons. There's the medusa-like gorgon, but there's also the iron cow, same origin as the catablepas in MMII. Basically exaggerations of wildebeests.
    I was well aware that a decent amount of them were mythological creatures, but that doesn’t mean I can’t bash on the oddness of their names. This wasn’t just made for monsters WotC created, right?

    ... Wait a second, what mythology does the dragon turtle come from? May I inquire as to what story showcases such a magnificent beast.
    Last edited by Requilac; 2018-05-19 at 12:05 PM.
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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    Gorgon is a big offender in the "confusing name" category, but I'd also like to nominate the dragonne. AKA "No, no, the accent was on the second syllable, guys."

    The old-school sea lion would be in this category too if they hadn't renamed it to sea cat.

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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    Quote Originally Posted by Requilac View Post
    I was well aware that a decent amount of them were mythological creatures, but that doesn’t mean I can’t bash on the oddness of their names. This wasn’t just made for monsters WotC created, right?
    TSR's responsible for the mythological mixups.

    Quote Originally Posted by Requilac View Post
    ... Wait a second, what mythology does the dragon turtle come from? May I inquire as to what story showcases such a magnificent beast.
    Bing says Chinese.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Troacctid View Post
    The old-school sea lion would be in this category too if they hadn't renamed it to sea cat.
    It's a national symbol of Singapore. Although to be fair, they usually render it in English as "merlion", which is less vague.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ericgrau View Post
    Obligatory duckbunny.
    I don't get the flak against the duckbunny. The idea for their origin (apprentice wizards experimenting with harmless animals before moving to the dangerous ones) is sound, and while they are not monsters in the meaning of opponents, they can provide a nice bit of color. My players reacted favorably when I described a herd of those as a random piece of scenery.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Celestia View Post
    I don't know what you're talking about. That's genius. I only wish that I came up with it first.
    i 100% agree. That's a masterpiece of a name.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Remuko View Post
    i 100% agree. That's a masterpiece of a name.
    If you are a Piers Anthony fan, then I suppose that would be true.

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    Quote Originally Posted by zlefin View Post
    how is it etymological gibberish?
    it looks like its based on the word phthisis,
    http://www.dictionary.com/browse/phthisis?s=t

    which at the very least gives you a pronunciation
    so I guess you pronounce it "thigh-sick?"

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    Quote Originally Posted by stack View Post
    If you are a Piers Anthony fan, then I suppose that would be true.
    Never heard of him. I just like puns. The more groan inducing to the majority of people the better.

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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    If we're bringing up drider, we have to mention its partner in crime, the scorrow, which is a scorpion drow. They didn't use the same setup for their portmanteau despite having the same tauric setup. Presumably because they thought "drorpion" was too awkward a name.

    I'm going to nominate the Ineffable Horror from Underdark, a monster trying very hard to be Cthulhu without really doing it. There's nothing mysterious about it, since it doesn't have any magical powers.

    Also gonna mention the Crypt Thing. It's certainly descriptive of where it is, but nothing about what it is.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Remuko View Post
    Never heard of him. I just like puns. The more groan inducing to the majority of people the better.
    for your own well-being, keep it that way and do not investigate further.

    I'll throw in "ripper" and "hook horror" as being bad because they're so generic and nonindicative, I will often forget the monsters they're associated with, or remember the monster, but blank on the name.
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    Default Re: Awful Monster Names

    I mean, if we're gonna complain about Gorgon being misapplied, there's an argument for Kobold. Kobolds in D&D have never even remotely resembled their folk lore roots and while I like the little lizard guys, it's a bit confusing if you think about it. Or is that complaining about monsters that were adapted poorly, rather than the name?
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jowgen View Post
    I got one that is awful for reasons other that those mentioned thus far.

    From Fiend Folio, I give you the one, the only... Living Holocaust.

    It's Evil, it burns you to death and it has a gaseous body, because of course it does...
    Fun fact:
    Holocaust is also a term for a kind of burning sacrifice.

    So it's probably not a WW2 reference, but it's still kind of an inappropriate name.


    i 100% agree. That's a masterpiece of a name.
    Puns are hit-or-miss but I love them personally.

    Plus, with the flail snail...there' no real point in giving it a "proper" name, because it's such a gonzo creature that giving it a normal name is taking it too seriously.

    I mean, if we're gonna complain about Gorgon being misapplied, there's an argument for Kobold. Kobolds in D&D have never even remotely resemble their folk lore roots and while I like the little lizard guys, it's a bit confusing if you think about it. Or is that complaining about monsters that were adapted poorly, rather than the name?
    Eh, little bit of A, little bit of B. Though nowadays I'm sure the vast majority of people only know of the D&D Kobold. What are they like in folklore?

    As for stupid names...Svirfneblin. There is no pronunciation guide that can help that name.
    Doesn't help that as far as underdark-dwelling midgets go, both Duragar and Derro are way more interesting.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Doorhandle View Post
    Fun fact:
    Holocaust is also a term for a kind of burning sacrifice.

    So it's probably not a WW2 reference, but it's still kind of an inappropriate name.
    >implying he didn't know that

    was the book written after the holocaust?

    then they knew perfectly well what everyone would think of when they named a monster after the holocaust, and are responsible for that decision

    Puns are hit-or-miss but I love them personally.

    Plus, with the flail snail...there' no real point in giving it a "proper" name, because it's such a gonzo creature that giving it a normal name is taking it too seriously.
    Yeah, plus in 1 and 2e, monsters were supposed to be stupid and goofy and not taken seriously, like the flumph (another horrible name)



    Eh, little bit of A, little bit of B. Though nowadays I'm sure the vast majority of people only know of the D&D Kobold. What are they like in folklore?

    As for stupid names...Svirfneblin. There is no pronunciation guide that can help that name.
    Doesn't help that as far as underdark-dwelling midgets go, both Duragar and Derro are way more interesting.
    kobolds are super interesting. lots of diverse stories about them.
    gedsundheidt. it sounds like an attempt to speak norweigan by someone who doesn't speak norweigan.

    in the vein of keyboard smashes, another of the many things lolth turns you into if you fail one of her trials: the chwidencha. impossible to pronounce and a stupid and lazily designed monster.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Requilac View Post
    Roc: It sounds like it should be describing a rock monster, but this is actually the name of a giant flying bird which can carry away elephants.
    Others already pointed out this is a mythological bird, I just wanted to add that it means little that a word has similarities with another english word, since oftentimes words etymology comes from latin, greek and other languages of the past.
    In this case, Roc comes from the persian word rokh, which means raven.
    Last edited by noce; 2018-05-20 at 03:29 AM.

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