The Order of the Stick: Utterly Dwarfed
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  1. - Top - End - #451
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Jul 2008

    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    HAAAAhahahaha! Ohh hoho, no. Haha, no, no. Phew! No. Here, here's our, '101 ways to save money,' booklet. If you're frugal enough, you should be able to fake being rich no problem.

    I want a robot capable of making my bed and cooking breakfast!
    Leo, Ajax, Deshy, Cutty.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  2. - Top - End - #452
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Here: A robot costume made out of cardboard and aluminum foil, along with a toaster and a box of Pop Tarts. Go wild, my friend; you're good to go!

    I wish to be an expert in all the subjects that interest me.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  3. - Top - End - #453
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Erythrina's Avatar

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    Jun 2018
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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Well, here, take this library card. There is probably enough books to cover every subject you're interested in. You just need some time and effort.

    I wish to visit every country in the world.

  4. - Top - End - #454
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    Balmas's Avatar

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Quote Originally Posted by Erythrina View Post
    I wish to visit every country in the world.
    Well, visit is a pretty subjective term. So, here. Have a ticket for a three-month world bus tour. No stops, but you'll at least be able to go through all the countries once.

    I wish for a new battery for my watch, as the old one is currently dead.
    I run a Let's Play channel! Check it out!
    Currently, we're playing through New Vegas as Gabriel de la Cruz, merchant and mercenary extraordinaire!

  5. - Top - End - #455
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Erythrina's Avatar

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Sure. This battery is going to die in five minutes, but hey, that's something!

    I wish for an ability to return people back to life.

  6. - Top - End - #456
    Barbarian in the Playground
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    Aug 2018

    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Quote Originally Posted by Erythrina View Post
    I wish for an ability to return people back to life.
    Here's a JRPG where you can revive fallen party members.

    I wish I my birthday was a national holiday recognized by every world government.

  7. - Top - End - #457
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Jul 2008

    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Interesting... You know, a lot of people complain when their birthday is also a holiday, since it means they only get one present from their families each year instead of two. Maybe you can find someone like that and trade birth certificates?

    I wish I could predict which Kickstarters will actually succeed at what they claim and set out to do.
    Last edited by Dr.Gunsforhands; 2019-08-30 at 09:37 PM.

  8. - Top - End - #458
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    DeTess's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by Dr.Gunsforhands View Post
    I wish I could predict which Kickstarters will actually succeed at what they claim and set out to do.
    Well, I can recommend you a pretty good business school. They should be able to teach you the things you need to know to figure that out there. Tuition might be a bit of an issue, but you could do a kickstarter for that?

    I wish I had more time.
    Jasnah avatar by Zea Mays

  9. - Top - End - #459
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Devil

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Time passes more slowly at high speeds and around dense objects. This is my friend Frank's address, he's nice but a near terminal case of moron and weighs about a quarter ton. Go run circles around him as fast as you can, should net you a second or two if you keep at it for a projected human lifespan, plus the benefit of exercise on said lifespan...

    I wish the world made sense!
    GNU Terry Pratchett

  10. - Top - End - #460
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Erythrina's Avatar

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Hey, I still have those free library cards I handed out not so long ago! Here, this one is yours. Hope the books we've got will help you to understand a little more about how the world works.

    I wish for a single grain of sand.

  11. - Top - End - #461
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

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    Jan 2019
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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Would you settle for a speck of dust?

    I wish to go on a wild shopping spree at the bookstore.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  12. - Top - End - #462
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Erythrina's Avatar

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Take these ten dollars, and visit the man that sells half a dozen dusty books at the flea market.

    I have discovered Zen, so I wish for nothing.

  13. - Top - End - #463
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    Flyingbooks42's Avatar

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    Sep 2018
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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Sorry, but we don't have a machine that can flatten out the quantum ripples in "absolute" vacuum, so I'll just give you a coupon for a home appliace store so that you can buy yourself a vacuum.


    I wish To be able to get my friend a new computer.
    Avatar by me
    LGBTQA+itp

    I am agender, so please use gender-neutral pronouns when referring to me, and, unless I explicitly say otherwise, my characters.

  14. - Top - End - #464
    Barbarian in the Playground
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    Aug 2018

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    Quote Originally Posted by Flyingbooks42 View Post
    I wish To be able to get my friend a new computer.
    Here's an old tamagotchi keychain from like the year 2001 for your friend.

    Now I wish I had a tamagotchi keychain cerca 2001.

  15. - Top - End - #465
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    I wasn't able to find any Tamagotchis circa 2001, unfortunately. But I can give you a small cardboard box with a rough sketch of a digitized pet on it.

    I wish I had a magic lamp with a genie in it that would grant outrageous wishes with no budgetary considerations.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  16. - Top - End - #466
    Barbarian in the Playground
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    Aug 2018

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    Quote Originally Posted by CyberiadQueen View Post
    I wish I had a magic lamp with a genie in it that would grant outrageous wishes with no budgetary considerations.
    Here's a VHS copy of Aladdin and a copy of Shantae: Half Genie hero for the Nintendo Switch.

    I wish my tamagotchi small, cardboard box would love me forever, and we'd go on a bunch of cool adventures.

  17. - Top - End - #467
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Jul 2008

    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    I see you've already received the box. I'm sure you can take it from here.

    I wish for a magnet-like device to attract all of my dropped pens and pencils from their various hiding places.
    Last edited by Dr.Gunsforhands; 2019-08-27 at 01:25 AM.
    Leo, Ajax, Deshy, Cutty.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  18. - Top - End - #468
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Here is a paper clip that I rubbed against a magnet until it gained a bit of polarity. Don't drop it, or the molecules will all go back to normal.

    I wish for a cell phone that would never lose its charge.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  19. - Top - End - #469
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Devil

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    Jul 2005
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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Here take this phone. It can't lose what it never has...

    I wish for all the soda I can drink.
    Last edited by Evil DM Mark3; 2019-08-27 at 03:38 AM.
    GNU Terry Pratchett

  20. - Top - End - #470
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Jul 2008

    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    According to the doctor, you shouldn't be drinking any. It's bad for you!

    I wish I had wings!
    Leo, Ajax, Deshy, Cutty.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  21. - Top - End - #471
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    DeTess's Avatar

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    May 2017
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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Here you go:
    Spoiler: Wings
    Show


    I wish I had a copy of Ace Combat 5
    Jasnah avatar by Zea Mays

  22. - Top - End - #472
    Barbarian in the Playground
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    Aug 2018

    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Quote Originally Posted by DeTess View Post
    I wish I had a copy of Ace Combat 5
    Here's a strategy guide with half the pages missing for that game.

    All I wanna wish is see you turn into a giant woman...a giant woman! (and also that someone gets the Steven Universe reference)

  23. - Top - End - #473
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Quote Originally Posted by Magic_Hat View Post
    All I wanna wish is see you turn into a giant woman...a giant woman! (and also that someone gets the Steven Universe reference)
    And here I am trying to lose weight. Thanks a lot.

    I wish for outrageous wealth that the IRS can never take away.
    Last edited by CyberiadQueen; 2019-09-02 at 06:37 PM.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  24. - Top - End - #474
    Barbarian in the Playground
    Join Date
    Aug 2018

    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Quote Originally Posted by CyberiadQueen View Post
    I wish for outrageous wealth that the IRS can never take away.
    Here are a bunch of Chuck E. Cheese tokens with no cash value that can't be taxed. Go play some skee ball maybe.

    Quote Originally Posted by CyberiadQueen View Post
    And here I am trying to lose weight. Thanks a lot.
    I wish to apologize to CyberiadQueen about the giant woman comment. I was just referencing a cartoon I like.

  25. - Top - End - #475
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Quote Originally Posted by Magic_Hat View Post
    I wish to apologize to CyberiadQueen about the giant woman comment. I was just referencing a cartoon I like.
    Granted: No worries; I wasn't offended.

    I wish to be as beautiful and as intelligent as Hedy Lamarr.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  26. - Top - End - #476
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Devil

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Here's a flask of acid, a home labotomy kit and Hedy Lamarr's home address. It might be a bit of an overshoot but I'm nice the that.

    I wish for a slice of peperoni pizza, thin and crispy base.
    GNU Terry Pratchett

  27. - Top - End - #477
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Jul 2008

    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Uh, okay! I found some ketchup packets and saltines in the break room! I think someone left Parmesan and pepper powder in the fridge, too... put them together, and... voila! Free spicy mini-pizzas!

    I wish my weekend drives were shorter!
    Leo, Ajax, Deshy, Cutty.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  28. - Top - End - #478
    Barbarian in the Playground
    Join Date
    Aug 2018

    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Quote Originally Posted by Dr.Gunsforhands View Post
    I wish my weekend drives were shorter!
    I condense the earth and everything on it including the roads by 0.000000000001%. You might save 1/100 of a second on time.

    I wish for a new television.

  29. - Top - End - #479
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Jul 2019

    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Here's a mini puppet show booth. You can see any show you like, as long as you have someone manning the puppets!

    I wish for the wifi at my place of work to actually function.
    Last edited by Cat'sPyjamas; 2019-09-10 at 06:41 PM.

  30. - Top - End - #480
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

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    Jan 2019
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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    The wifi now works for a randomly-chosen five minutes a day. When you're not there.

    I wish for everyone's wishes to come true, without budgetary limitations.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

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