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  1. - Top - End - #121
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Granted! We printed off a cycle of Mox entries from the MtG contest threads. They’re not legal to play, but they are certainly original.

    I wish for some self-watering houseplants.
    Leo, Minnie, Ajax, Timmy.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  2. - Top - End - #122
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    ElfRangerGuy

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Here are some weeds I found next to a nearby field. They're plants, you can put them in your house and they are hardy enough to stay outside. If it rains, they will water themselves.

    I wish for a self-driving car.
    Clacks-Overhead: GNU Terry Pratchett

    "Magic can turn a frog into a prince. Science can turn a frog into a Ph.D. and you still have the frog you started with." Terry Pratchett
    "I will not yield to evil, unless she's cute."

  3. - Top - End - #123
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Crisis21's Avatar

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Here you go! Just pull it back and let it go!




    I wish I knew how to build a lightsaber.
    Wind & Sound Elemental Eric Greenhilt avatar by Akrim.elf
    Bodyguard in Lix's Harem
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  4. - Top - End - #124
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Sure, I've played KOTOR! You'll need a unique blown-glass lens to represent your mental focus, a reinforced flute with a grip and material customized for your body, and a magical force crystal perfectly attuned to the power of your SOUL. I can't give you any of those things, obviously, but if you ever find a combination of components that are destined to become a lightsaber they should snap or screw together pretty intuitively.

    I wish it would stop raining.
    Leo, Minnie, Ajax, Timmy.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  5. - Top - End - #125
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    Papaya101's Avatar

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Well, you didn’t specify if you wanted it to stop raining water or stop raining in general, and the sky needs something coming out of it, so water stops coming out. It’s replaced with trombones.

    I wish for a bowl of motor oil.
    Quote Originally Posted by Flyingbooks42 View Post
    Papaya101 is the god of cyborg turtles and large quantities of tropical fruit. Only turtles who have been blessed with the secrets of the Electronic Papaya even know of Papaya101's existence.

  6. - Top - End - #126
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    ElfRangerGuy

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    That's an easy one. Just go to a local garage. They throw away tons of the stuff. I'm sure if you ask nicely you can have a bowl of their used motor oil (bring your own bowl).

    I wish to have less meetings at work.
    Clacks-Overhead: GNU Terry Pratchett

    "Magic can turn a frog into a prince. Science can turn a frog into a Ph.D. and you still have the frog you started with." Terry Pratchett
    "I will not yield to evil, unless she's cute."

  7. - Top - End - #127
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Granted! I stole your pants and broke your phone, so you should be safe from in-person and remote meetings both. If you attend via computer, I can break that too.

    I wish to have my nails trimmed.
    Last edited by Dr.Gunsforhands; 2018-09-11 at 06:37 AM.
    Leo, Minnie, Ajax, Timmy.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  8. - Top - End - #128
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Crisis21's Avatar

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    I can give you a nervous habit of biting your nails, but that's the best I can do. My office was served a cease-and-desist order against providing cosmetic services after the last incident.



    I wish I could drive MechaGodzilla.
    Wind & Sound Elemental Eric Greenhilt avatar by Akrim.elf
    Bodyguard in Lix's Harem
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  9. - Top - End - #129
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    Papaya101's Avatar

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    Well, sure! Granted!

    We don’t provide the MechaGodzilla, though.

    I wish for an in-home library.
    Quote Originally Posted by Flyingbooks42 View Post
    Papaya101 is the god of cyborg turtles and large quantities of tropical fruit. Only turtles who have been blessed with the secrets of the Electronic Papaya even know of Papaya101's existence.

  10. - Top - End - #130
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Granted! I sold your existing home and used the funds to secure a closet at your local library in a questionably-legal exchange for your services as a security guard. It's less of an in-home library and more of an in-library home, but we technically turned a profit on this one!

    I wish for a cat.
    Last edited by Dr.Gunsforhands; 2018-11-05 at 11:37 PM.
    Leo, Minnie, Ajax, Timmy.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  11. - Top - End - #131
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    Papaya101's Avatar

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    Here’s your crazy rabid tiger! I got it for free. The zoo didn’t want it.

    I wish to be Roy in OotS, but in real life.
    Last edited by Papaya101; 2018-09-14 at 10:04 AM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Flyingbooks42 View Post
    Papaya101 is the god of cyborg turtles and large quantities of tropical fruit. Only turtles who have been blessed with the secrets of the Electronic Papaya even know of Papaya101's existence.

  12. - Top - End - #132
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Here you get to be a sumo fighter

    I wish to have a katana

  13. - Top - End - #133
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    ElfRangerGuy

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Here is a comic of Katana .

    I wish for world peace.
    Clacks-Overhead: GNU Terry Pratchett

    "Magic can turn a frog into a prince. Science can turn a frog into a Ph.D. and you still have the frog you started with." Terry Pratchett
    "I will not yield to evil, unless she's cute."

  14. - Top - End - #134
    Pixie in the Playground
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    You move to a peaceful town


    I wish for infinite pancakes

  15. - Top - End - #135
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    In... infinite?! Um... okay. Okay! I think I have a recipe you can use to make that happen. However, I should warn you, this plan is going to involve a lot of... “recycling.”

    I wish for a vegetable garden on my windowsill!
    Leo, Minnie, Ajax, Timmy.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  16. - Top - End - #136
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    Flyingbooks42's Avatar

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    You get a few seeds, a bucket of dirt, a bucket of sand, and an extremely hot furnace. It's up to you to trace several thousand years of human history.

    I wish for a good book
    Avatar by linklele
    LGBTQA+itp

  17. - Top - End - #137
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Crisis21's Avatar

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    Sorry, due to a dispute between the genie union and multiple publishers, I am currently not allowed to give out books of any kind. I can give you directions to the library if you want.


    I wish my phone had infinite storage space.
    Wind & Sound Elemental Eric Greenhilt avatar by Akrim.elf
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  18. - Top - End - #138
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    ElfRangerGuy

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    Here is a floppy disk I still had hanging around. I heard that there was a human that said that 640K was enough for everybody and this is more, so while it isn't infinite, it should be plenty.

    I wish to create the perfect roleplaying character.
    Clacks-Overhead: GNU Terry Pratchett

    "Magic can turn a frog into a prince. Science can turn a frog into a Ph.D. and you still have the frog you started with." Terry Pratchett
    "I will not yield to evil, unless she's cute."

  19. - Top - End - #139
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Crisis21's Avatar

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    I have a blank character sheet, four d6, and a fresh pencil if you want them.


    I wish I could build the world's biggest LEGO castle.
    Wind & Sound Elemental Eric Greenhilt avatar by Akrim.elf
    Bodyguard in Lix's Harem
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  20. - Top - End - #140
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Granted! You could go do that right now, if you want! I'm certainly not going to stop you. I'm not going to influence your design choices by bribing you with free bricks, either.

    I wish for a newspaper subscription.
    Leo, Minnie, Ajax, Timmy.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  21. - Top - End - #141
    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    You can pick up your newspaper each day at the recycling plant. We are not responsible for any damage it might have suffered prior to being recycled.

    I wish I had a copy of every book ever written.
    The gnomes once had many mines, but now they have gnome ore.

  22. - Top - End - #142
    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Bohandas's Avatar

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    Here's a Kindle

    I wish for eternal life

  23. - Top - End - #143
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Ooh! Ooh! I got this one! I found like ten of bottles of the eternaLifeTM herbal supplement yesterday! The box was marked, 'Introductory Seller's Pack,' and it came with this brochure that had a triangular diagram promising a vaguely idyllic lifestyle. I guess that's why the previous owner could afford to abandon their car on a bridge with the door open?

    I wish for a plan to foil heinous pyramid schemes.
    Last edited by Dr.Gunsforhands; 2018-11-05 at 11:38 PM.
    Leo, Minnie, Ajax, Timmy.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  24. - Top - End - #144
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Crisis21's Avatar

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Don't buy into them? Sorry, all I got.


    I wish for a talking magical cat. In black, please.
    Wind & Sound Elemental Eric Greenhilt avatar by Akrim.elf
    Bodyguard in Lix's Harem
    Ninja-Pirate of BvS's Privateer village! Come and join me!
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  25. - Top - End - #145
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    ElfRangerGuy

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Here is a black Furby (TM). I'm not sure if it's magical, but it can talk (sort of).

    I wish for a computer fast enough to play the latest computer games on.
    Clacks-Overhead: GNU Terry Pratchett

    "Magic can turn a frog into a prince. Science can turn a frog into a Ph.D. and you still have the frog you started with." Terry Pratchett
    "I will not yield to evil, unless she's cute."

  26. - Top - End - #146
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Granted! This one from 2008 should suit your needs just fine. ...hm? Still not fast enough? Ridiculous. I assure you that the 2018 desktops are all equally-stationary inanimate objects.

    I wish I could get more done in the two hours I have before bed.
    Leo, Minnie, Ajax, Timmy.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  27. - Top - End - #147
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Imp

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Granted! You get a script that can type up Word Documents for you automatically...well, randomly, using your spellcheck dictionary. But if the infinite monkeys and typewriters holds true, running the script for a couple hours before bed might have a small chance of writing something remotely useful to you. It's just a matter of finding it amidst all the noise.

    I wish for safe driving conditions this evening.
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES
    EXPLODED RUNES
    PICTURE OF A CAT
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES

  28. - Top - End - #148
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    ClericGirl

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    Quote Originally Posted by Korith View Post
    Granted! You get a script that can type up Word Documents for you automatically...well, randomly, using your spellcheck dictionary. But if the infinite monkeys and typewriters holds true, running the script for a couple hours before bed might have a small chance of writing something remotely useful to you. It's just a matter of finding it amidst all the noise.

    I wish for safe driving conditions this evening.

    Granted! You get to play a free online driving simulator.

    I wish for more time in my life for all the things I want to do this evening.
    Spoiler: Character Sheets
    Show

  29. - Top - End - #149
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    I can probably arrange for some of the events and deadlines to be postponed! I can pull a fire alarm, or break a professor's laptop...

    I wish for a soda fountain.
    Leo, Minnie, Ajax, Timmy.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  30. - Top - End - #150
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Crisis21's Avatar

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    Default Re: Wish Granting on a Budget

    I have an unopened six-pack of 7-Up if you want it. Still cold.


    I wish for a real-life eevee.
    Last edited by Crisis21; 2018-11-18 at 08:55 PM.
    Wind & Sound Elemental Eric Greenhilt avatar by Akrim.elf
    Bodyguard in Lix's Harem
    Ninja-Pirate of BvS's Privateer village! Come and join me!
    My Extended Signature
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