Monologues Needed

[JNAProductions]

Specifically, relatively short (no more than two minutes, I think) male modern monologues.

Any assistance appreciated!

[Xihirli]

Waiting for Godot

Pozzo: (suddenly furious). Have you not done tormenting me with your accursed time! It's abominable! When! When! One day, is that not enough for you, one day he went dumb, one day I went blind, one day we'll go deaf, one day we were born, one day we shall die, the same day, the same second, is that not enough for you? (Calmer.) They give birth astride of a grave, the light gleams an instant, then it's night once more.

[Lvl 2 Expert]

What is the purpose of the thread? What do you want these monologues for?

[JNAProductions]

What is the purpose of the thread? What do you want these monologues for?

An audition, in some three weeks, for my local community college.

I've done some googling around, and nothing I've found (so far) is especially appealing.

[Lvl 2 Expert]

Okay, so the emphasis is on something you can act out, put emotion into.

There's not a lot coming to mind right now...

Captain Picard should have a few good ones. Maybe a villain monologue, Silence of the Lambs (this is probably the best tip in this post, not getting any better), or maybe Die Hard has one? You could even do SAW, one of the "Hello I want to play a game" speeches. For comedy I'm sure there's monologues in Monty Python's material, but that might be a bit too well known. Maybe a pre-battle speech from a war movie? I know Alexander and Braveheart have them. (Does that count as modern? It's about the age of the work right, not the setting?) And I'm probably forgetting an epic one from Lord of the Rings which I only forgot because the battle afterwards was so good. The leader of the riders of Rohan speeches at some point I think. Or you could try thinking of sports movies. Every sports movie has a "we're 10 points down but not giving up" speech, sometimes even mentioning that there's no rule that a dog can't play basketball.

The problem is the length. Almost all the preaching in Jurassic Park for instance is done in witty oneliners, not longer monologues.

[JNAProductions]

Okay, so the emphasis is on something you can act out, put emotion into.

There's not a lot coming to mind right now...

Captain Picard should have a few good ones. Maybe a villain monologue, Silence of the Lambs (this is probably the best tip in this post, not getting any better), or maybe Die Hard has one? You could even do SAW, one of the "Hello I want to play a game" speeches. For comedy I'm sure there's monologues in Monty Python's material, but that might be a bit too well known. Maybe a pre-battle speech from a war movie? I know Alexander and Braveheart have them. (Does that count as modern? It's about the age of the work right, not the setting?) And I'm probably forgetting an epic one from Lord of the Rings which I only forgot because the battle afterwards was so good. The leader of the riders of Rohan speeches at some point I think. Or you could try thinking of sports movies. Every sports movie has a "we're 10 points down but not giving up" speech, sometimes even mentioning that there's no rule that a dog can't play basketball.

The problem is the length. Almost all the preaching in Jurassic Park for instance is done in witty oneliners, not longer monologues.

The ideal is about one minute, so short is okay.

But yeah, one-liners are not the best. Thank you for your help, though!

[Cristo Meyers]

The ideal is about one minute, so short is okay.

But yeah, one-liners are not the best. Thank you for your help, though!

There's Col. Jessup from A Few Good Men:

Spoiler

Show

You can't handle the truth! Son, we live in a world that has walls and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Who's gonna do it, you? You, Lieutenant Weinburg? I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom! You weep for Santiago and you curse the Marines! You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know! That Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives! And my existence, while grotesque, and incomprehensible to you, saves lives! You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall! You need me on that wall! We use words like 'Honor,' 'Code,' 'Loyalty!' We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline! I have neither the time, nor the inclination, to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it! I would rather you just said 'Thank you,' and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon, and stand at post! Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to!

The lesser known response from Kaffee as well, but it's a bit short:

Spoiler

Show

You trashed the law! But hey, we understand, you’re permitted. You have a greater responsibility than we can possibly fathom. You provide us with a blanket of freedom. We live in a world that has walls and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns, and nothing is going to stand in your way of doing it. Not Willie Santiago, not Dawson and Downey, not Markinson, not 1,000 armies, not the Uniform Code of Military Justice, and not the Constitution of the United States! That’s the truth isn’t it Colonel? I can handle it.

Neither works quite as well without the lead up, though.

[ve4grm]

So apparently this site is a thing: http://www.monologuedb.com/

How about Apocalypse Now? http://www.monologuedb.com/dramatic-...alter-e-kurtz/
Samwise Gamgee? http://www.monologuedb.com/monologue...amwise-gamgee/
Uncle Jesse from Full House? http://www.monologuedb.com/comedic-f...se-ketsopolis/
Doctor Who? http://www.monologuedb.com/dramatic-...ho-the-doctor/
Willy Wonka? http://www.monologuedb.com/comedic-m...y-willy-wonka/

(There's a link on the right for 1-minute monologues specifically.)

[Scarlet Knight]

Lou Gehrig's "Luckiest Man" speech.

[Some Android]

Tears in the Rain from the end of Bladerunner.

[JNAProductions]

It occurs to me, are there any good monologues available from Future Trunks, from DBZ or Super?

Edit: So, I think I settled on this gem, from our favorite webcomic.

Edited slightly, to make it a monologue. And I really want to work in:

Tarquin grins maniacally.
Tarquin: That's the beauty of it all, my son.
Tarquin: If I win, I get to be a king.
Tarquin: If I lose, I get to be a legend.

But I can't have it run too long.

Spoiler: Monologue

Show

Like most things, winning is a matter of perspective. You’re a bard, right? How many stories have you heard in which a single hero vanquishes a wicked empire? Dozens, yes!

What is the one thing they have in common? Yes, of course, the hero wins in the end, but the important part is the wicked empire exists. Don’t you see, Elan? The rules of drama to which you subscribe as a bard tell us that such tyrannies can exist-indeed, must exist-and persist long enough that no one realistically thinks that they can be defeated. Else, where's the drama in a hero opposing them? And if such kingdoms are necessary, why shouldn't I rule one?

And yes, in the end, a hero appears and beats them. But, Elan, you can’t always fixate on the negative. Try being more optimistic.

If someone conquers an empire and rules it with an iron fist for thirty long years, and then some paladin breaks into his throne room and kills him, what do you think he's going to remember as he lays dying? Not that “good triumphed over evil”, no-that he got to live like a god for three decades! Sure, the last ten minutes sucked, but you can’t have everything.

And in the end… Well, what end? The story? There’s no real end-just a point when the storyteller stops talking.

Somewhere in between “villain of the week” and “good triumphs over evil” there’s a sweet spot where guys like me get to rule the roost for years. As long as I go into this accepting the price I may eventually pay, then I win, no matter what actually happens.

[Elanasaurus]

Thought you said you wanted it "modern"...

[JNAProductions]

Thought you said you wanted it "modern"...

Modern writing, I think.

I will be checking if it's okay, though.

[Stelio Kontos]

I'm partial to sports stuff, probably the best recent one of which is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vwpTj_Z9v-c

[BWR]

There's always the Thirteenth Doctor's little speech about why he does what he does.

[GolemsVoice]

The "Tears in the Rain" speech from Blade Runner is a classic for sure.

[Serpentine]

There's lots of good ones by Terry Pratchett. Maybe his "pray you're at the mercy of an evil man" (a monologue about monologuing! Meta af!). Probably too short, though:

"If you have to look along the shaft of an arrow from the wrong end, if a man has you entirely at his mercy, then hope like hell that man is an evil man. Because the evil like power, power over people, and they want to see you in fear. They want you to know you're going to die. So they'll talk. They'll gloat.
They'll watch you squirm. They'll put off the moment of murder like another man will put off a good cigar.
So hope like hell your captor is an evil man. A good man will kill you with hardly a word."

Something by Tarantino would probably be good.

On the other end of the length scale, there's a short story by Stephen King called iirc The End of the Whole Mess. It might be too long, but if it's not, or if you can cut it down, it could be really good for demonstrating your acting chops, without risking just imitating someone else's.
It's in the form of someone leaving an account of how the world ends, I can't remember whether written or spoken, but either way their articulation gradually deteriorates. If you could get that across, it could be pretty impressive.

[2D8HP]

From a 1940 Charlie Chaplin film:

"I’m sorry, but I don’t want to be an emperor. That’s not my business. I don’t want to rule or conquer anyone. I should like to help everyone - if possible - Jew, Gentile - black man - white. We all want to help one another. Human beings are like that. We want to live by each other’s happiness - not by each other’s misery. We don’t want to hate and despise one another. In this world there is room for everyone. And the good earth is rich and can provide for everyone. The way of life can be free and beautiful, but we have lost the way.

Greed has poisoned men’s souls, has barricaded the world with hate, has goose-stepped us into misery and bloodshed. We have developed speed, but we have shut ourselves in. Machinery that gives abundance has left us in want. Our knowledge has made us cynical. Our cleverness, hard and unkind. We think too much and feel too little. More than machinery we need humanity. More than cleverness we need kindness and gentleness. Without these qualities, life will be violent and all will be lost….

The aeroplane and the radio have brought us closer together. The very nature of these inventions cries out for the goodness in men - cries out for universal brotherhood - for the unity of us all. Even now my voice is reaching millions throughout the world - millions of despairing men, women, and little children - victims of a system that makes men torture and imprison innocent people.

To those who can hear me, I say - do not despair. The misery that is now upon us is but the passing of greed - the bitterness of men who fear the way of human progress. The hate of men will pass, and dictators die, and the power they took from the people will return to the people. And so long as men die, liberty will never perish. …..

Soldiers! don’t give yourselves to brutes - men who despise you - enslave you - who regiment your lives - tell you what to do - what to think and what to feel! Who drill you - diet you - treat you like cattle, use you as cannon fodder. Don’t give yourselves to these unnatural men - machine men with machine minds and machine hearts! You are not machines! You are not cattle! You are men! You have the love of humanity in your hearts! You don’t hate! Only the unloved hate - the unloved and the unnatural! Soldiers! Don’t fight for slavery! Fight for liberty!

In the 17th Chapter of St Luke it is written: “the Kingdom of God is within man” - not one man nor a group of men, but in all men! In you! You, the people have the power - the power to create machines. The power to create happiness! You, the people, have the power to make this life free and beautiful, to make this life a wonderful adventure.

Then - in the name of democracy - let us use that power - let us all unite. Let us fight for a new world - a decent world that will give men a chance to work - that will give youth a future and old age a security. By the promise of these things, brutes have risen to power. But they lie! They do not fulfil that promise. They never will!

Dictators free themselves but they enslave the people! Now let us fight to fulfil that promise! Let us fight to free the world - to do away with national barriers - to do away with greed, with hate and intolerance. Let us fight for a world of reason, a world where science and progress will lead to all men’s happiness. Soldiers! in the name of democracy, let us all unite!"

-Final speech from The Great Dictator

Or maybe these one's that I cited before:

Only one scene?

Forget that, as my favorite depends on my mood, and how high it's simmering, but all involve doing what's right instead of seeking happiness, and are old and perhaps trite.

The first is the next to last scene in Casablanca

Spoiler: Rick and Ilsa

Show

Rick: Last night we said a great many things. You said I was to do the thinking for both of us. Well, I've done a lot of it since then, and it all adds up to one thing: you're getting on that plane with Victor where you belong.

Ilsa: But, Richard, no, I... I...

Rick: Now, you've got to listen to me! You have any idea what you'd have to look forward to if you stayed here? Nine chances out of ten, we'd both wind up in a concentration camp. Isn't that true, Louie?

Captain Renault: I'm afraid Major Strasser would insist.

Ilsa: You're saying this only to make me go.

Rick: I'm saying it because it's true. Inside of us, we both know you belong with Victor. You're part of his work, the thing that keeps him going. If that plane leaves the ground and you're not with him, you'll regret it. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of your life.

Ilsa: But what about us?

Rick: We'll always have Paris. We didn't have, we, we lost it until you came to Casablanca. We got it back last night.

Ilsa: When I said I would never leave you.

Rick: And you never will. But I've got a job to do, too. Where I'm going, you can't follow. What I've got to do, you can't be any part of. Ilsa, I'm no good at being noble, but it doesn't take much to see that the problems of three little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world. Someday you'll understand that.

[Ilsa lowers her head and begins to cry]

Rick: Now, now...

[Rick gently places his hand under her chin and raises it so their eyes meet]

Rick: Here's looking at you kid.

But that bit of Casablanca only works in the total context of the film, and if you haven't seen it...

"Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra"

and

"Picard and Dathon at El-Adrel"

....then we have a language barrier.

---

My next choice, while better if you've seen the film (or read the book) may still work by itself:

Spoiler: Tom Joad's farewell scene in the Grapes of Wrath

Show

Tom Joad: I been thinking about us, too, about our people living like pigs and good rich land layin' fallow. Or maybe one guy with a million acres and a hundred thousand farmers starvin'. And I been wonderin' if all our folks got together and yelled...

Ma Joad: Oh, Tommy, they'd drag you out and cut you down just like they done to Casy.

Tom: They’d drag me anyways. Sooner or later they’d get me for one thing if not for another. Until then…

Ma: Tommy, you’re not aimin’ to kill nobody.

Tom: No, Ma, not that. That ain’t it. It’s just, well as long as I’m an outlaw anyways… maybe I can do somethin’… maybe I can just find out somethin’, just scrounge around and maybe find out what it is that’s wrong and see if they ain’t somethin’ that can be done about it. I ain’t thought it out all clear, Ma. I can’t. I don’t know enough.

Ma: How am I gonna know about ya, Tommy? Why they could kill ya and I’d never know. They could hurt ya. How am I gonna know?

Tom: Well, maybe it’s like Casy says. A fellow ain’t got a soul of his own, just little piece of a big soul, the one big soul that belongs to everybody, then…

Ma: Then what, Tom?

Tom: Then it don’t matter. I’ll be all around in the dark – I’ll be everywhere. Wherever you can look – wherever there’s a fight, so hungry people can eat, I’ll be there. Wherever there’s a cop beatin’ up a guy, I’ll be there. I’ll be in the way guys yell when they’re mad. I’ll be in the way kids laugh when they’re hungry and they know supper’s ready, and when the people are eatin’ the stuff they raise and livin’ in the houses they build – I’ll be there, too.

Ma: I don’t understand it, Tom.

Tom: Me, neither, Ma, but – just somethin’ I been thinkin’ about.

---

Since my first two choices are "non-genre" and more about the dialog rather than the visuals, my third pick is actually the three or four scenes involving the Grail quest of Sir Percival in the film Excalibur:

Spoiler: This has Helen Mirren!

Show

Spoiler: What happens

Show

Despite her being played by Helen freakin' Mirren, Sir Percival resists Morgana, achieves the Grail, brings it to King Arthur, and heals him (and the land with him).

Probably the one from "The Grapes of Wrath"

[Magic_Hat]

Has anyone mentioned any of the Joker's speeches from Dark Knight. Kind of cliche but still could be good.

"Let me tell you now I got these scars..."

[JNAProductions]

So, I ended up choosing a more comedic monologue, from a play who's title I can't even say due to forum rules.

However, I really appreciate the help all y'all have provided! Thanks so much! :)

[Magic_Hat]

So, I ended up choosing a more comedic monologue, from a play who's title I can't even say due to forum rules.

Playwright(s) at least? Year it debuted?

[JNAProductions]

Search for "Poona The Dog and other plays for children". I've omitted an f-bomb in the title, so google at your own risk.

[Magic_Hat]

Search for "Poona The Dog and other plays for children". I've omitted an f-bomb in the title, so google at your own risk.

I don't know what you're talking about, but after a google search I feel I will soon be full of regrets.

[Razade]

I don't know what you're talking about, but after a google search I feel I will soon be full of regrets.

It's a play that's about as subtle as someone running into your bedroom at 2 in the morning, screaming "SEX" in your ear while you sleep and then absconding with your television set.

[LordEntrails]

I think Firefly/Serenity had some great ones:

My second favorite is probably just what you are looking for;
"I aim to Misbehave", about 73 seconds; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1VR3Av9qfZc

[Magic_Hat]

It's a play that's about as subtle as someone running into your bedroom at 2 in the morning, screaming "SEX" in your ear while you sleep and then absconding with your television set.

That happened to me once.

[comicshorse]

Not to over do the Doctor Who but lets go for 'Hello Stonehenge'

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pa74e8oAvIM

[Knaight]

I was going to recommend a Tom Stoppard monologue, but it sounds like you're covered. Going with an actual play seems like the best decision.

[Scarlet Knight]

Well, it's been a bit; how did the audition go?