Thanksmasnewyearskwanzakkah 2018 - 10 Years of Thanksmas!

[Morty]

[Kids]

"That's a really big guitar!" Tuskfang says when Endok and Olon are back. "Let's leave our presents with grown-ups so we can go play!"

[Goblins & Gnomes]

"Well, that's something to worry about later," Brinika decides. "Right now let's bring everybody the news and then keep on throwing snowballs!"

[Arkhosia]

Last Thanksmas, I Gave You My Hat

"Hmm. Well, I guess this is goodbye, Señor Sombrero," Saint Lazarus melodramatically sighs, and removes the sombrero from her head to place atop the snowman's instead. It's not like the cold could do anything to her anyway, being a ghoul and all. Heck, even if she wasn't a ghoul, she came prepared with a beanie on her head and everything, so she already had a hat before she even met Señor Sombrero.

[Snow-Like-Snowmen Meditation]

"That's one stylish snowman now," Calm Reed says. "I'm sure the gods of this holiday are pleased." She may be making an assumption or two here. "Is this an effigy for one of them in particular?"

The Cold Never Bothered Laz Anyway?

Fidelia smiles as Jenette relinquishes the fabulous-looking, albeit slightly-crushed, sombrero, putting in place their work's piece-de-resistance. "I'm sure Kit will appreciate your sacrifice." the squire reassures, taking the moment to look at Mr. Harington's new attire with a proud little smirk. Fidelia blinks for a second as Calm Reed makes a couple assumptions, turning towards her with some confusion. "I... um, don't think there are any? R-right, Jen?" She wasn't actually too sure, now that Reed mentioned it....

[Murkus]

[Batu and Div]

Batu's ears droop slightly as they move towards a table and he starts to take his pick of the holiday food.

"No, no. It's just... I'm a hobgoblin, not a goblin. Folks back home called me a goblin, and... they didn't mean it well."

[Batu and Div]

"Oh, Batu, I'm sorry. I didn't know that," says Div, still so earnest and innocent in all his mannerisms. He lets the crunching snow break the silence for a moment before he puts an arm around Batu and adds, "I'll call you whatever you want, you know."

[Shadowcaller]

[Elfpocalypse!]

Rain yelps in surprise and pushes her hands deeper into the bear's fur, gripping tightly as the bear begins to approach the reindeer at alarming speed. Of the ways she was thinking of spending Thanksmas, holding on for dear life on a charging bear probably wasn't one of them. Once the initial surprise wears off though, she begins whooping in excitement, laughing as the bear lunges through the snow.

[Elfpocalypse!]

Dashing through the snow
In a one-bear chase
Over the fields Rain go
Laughing all the way.
Bells on reindeer ring
Making spirits bright
What fun it is to ride and sing
A chasing song tonight.

However, the gay ride takes an unfortunate turn when the reindeer is forced to bolt towards the section of the village where people are making snowmen. As a being of thankmas magic the reindeer can easily avoid hurting the jolly snowpeople. However the same thing can't be said for the over 11 feet long fey-bear and its rider.

To her credit, Anika does her best to avoid causing any damage to anyone or anything but as she's still continuing the chase that credit is immediately revoked and replaced with coal. Any damage done to any of the snow men or their creators is ultimately up to their players but its at least bond to cause some chaos.

[PLAYERS TO CHARACTERS BUILDING SNOWMEN PAY ATTENTION]

[Gnrlshrimp]

[Suzie & Santa-Krayger]

Squidgirl? Squidgirl?! She's so much more than just squid-y! Why, if she could hear you through the fourth wall...

Suzie deflates slightly at hearing more-or-less what she expected to hear. She swivels the tentacle clutching the list round to show it to Krayger. There's two lists on it - one for "Minion M" and one for "Minion A". And in each list? Just clothes. Three for Minion A and somewhere nearer twenty for Minion M.

If Krayger looks over the list, he'll see that some of the clothing items listed for "Minion M" are a little bit...risque.

"If it's one thing per person-" The krakengirl mumbles, peering at her options, "Could I make it three by asking for something off the list for myself?"

[Morty]

[Elfpocalypse!]

Some snow-goblins seem to have suffered due to the bear-rampage. Squeaky voices complain about it as Anika runs past.

"Heeeey!"

"No fair!"

"That's mean!"

[Deathkeeper]

[Santa-Krayger and Suzie]

Suzie gets a wry smile from Santa.
”Charity is it’s own reward. But if you want so much that’s up to the magic bag to decide.” he says, holding up the bag in question.

[Recaiden]

[Santa Krayger]

"Thanks, Santa."
Nadas transfers his sword from the crude wrapping it was in to the proper sheathe.
There. That's much better, isn't it?

[Elfpocalypse!]

Although the builders have moved on, the rampaging bear manages to jostle Leah's snowman.
The head tilts and then topples to the ground, beady snow-person eyes staring accusingly (and sideways) at Anika.

[Gnrlshrimp]

[Suzie and Santa-Krayger]

"Why I-" For the briefest moment, the krakengirl's temper flares up. If only she wasn't cursed with this pathetic form! If only she could properly channel even a fraction of her terrifying might through her staff! She's show this stingy cow-santa what it means to cross Suzie! She'd show him good!

"I understand" She finishes quietly, sighing and staring at her list again. "It needs to be in red-and-black, to match my outfit. I'd like to get Mi- I'd like to request a maid uniform for Marina, and a new suit for Alex. And if the bag is feeling generous-" Suzie's really, really trying with the politeness here. It doesn't come easy to her, but this is important! Her tentacle flicks back and forth between two items on the list as she tries to make her choice, "A bu- no, not that." She mumbles reluctantly, "No, a nice warm coat for me to give to her."

[Morty]

[Batu and Div]

Batu leans into Div contentedly a bit.

"I don't know what I'd like to be called by my boyfriend, so I suppose I'll just trust your creativity on that," he says, then looks down at his gift. He gives the orb a good shake. It seems to show a large expanse of tents and huts in a snowy forest. "They seem to be getting along well enough."

[Leostales]

Refreshments and Dragons

"Thank you for the advice, it means a lot," Anatya says. "I have to go do that mission for MERC." Muun announces as he gets up. "When I'm finished we'll do just that."

((Muun and Anatya already have scenes in Inside. If you want to do a time-jump for them, that is fine. Otherwise I wouldn't mind time to wrap up the scenes they're already in, but whatever works for you.))

[Artemis97]

[Raril and Son]

Raril will gladly give Nadas a microbead. "Gods, how old are you?" He wonders, looking dumbstruck. "By my reckoning you should only be like fifteen, but the nexus time flow compared to Menzoberranzan aged you up quite a bit."



[Santa and the Xar'Chas]

Sornnolu thinks. "I'd like one of those... book tablet things? Supposedly you could keep a whole library's worth of books on them. The thing is, it should be magic based, not electronic, though. The palace doesn't have much in the way of proper electricity. Not yet, anyways." Now he'd have a place to keep all his spellbooks, and more recreational reading, and no one would be able to tell which he was reading, either.

[Deathkeeper]

[Suzie and Santa Krayger]

Krayger nods, seemingly satisfied. Reaching into the bag he removes a large garment bag.
”There you are. Merry Thanksmas.” he declares. Inside the bag should be what she asked for. Hopefully they fit. They usually do.

[Lord Magtok]

Weight of the World

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[A MagElf on the MagShelf?]

"If you play along, Magtok, I'll even let you preserve your decency behind that tree over there. You could try to run, but I kinda get to cheat here. And you're definitely not strong enough to try and fight your way free. Wings is right, best just to let us have our little bit of Thanksmas fun and get it over with." Appealing to Magtok's sense of reason doesn't always end well, Ithuriel. You might actually be undoing Ambriel's work!

Nevertheless, she lets go of Magtok and nods to Ambriel to offer him the elf costume.

Well now it just sounds like Ithuriel's gloating. Just for that, he'll definitely be sure to get his revenge on her. Maybe in a way that doesn't involve Ambriel, since a number of his more recent machinations and plots require the cooperation of his siblings, but no promises. He's still a part of this nonsense, even if it was clearly all Ithuriel's idea. Speaking of, how did a MagClone ever become so meek and passive? You'd never see a real Magtok allow Caelynn or even Libitina put a leash around his neck the way Ambriel clearly has with his angelic ladylove. Disgusting.

"Unfold your wings, Ambriel. Be my changing booth; keep her honest."

"You know she's-"

"I know she's already seen you," Magtok corrects, before Ambriel can finish his rebuttal. "I'm from a younger generation of clones; I've got all the firmware updates none of you Factionites ever will. You've gotten soft and weak as the sparkly diplomat boy, whereas this body of mine has been honed in a constant war for survival, fighting tooth and nail against our own ancestral home. Strife has kept me lean and sharp as glass, and I-"

"-you're sucking in your gut right now because you know you're eight pounds over the standard MagClone weight, five more than the last time I saw you. Stress eating from being away from the others for so long, probably. Listen, let's just wrap this up already, Magtok."

Magtok scowls and practically hisses at the faux-angel in response, but Ambriel just turns around spreads his wings as requested as he changes into the dumb outfit. You know what, screw all of that noise about leaving Angeltok out of the revenge plans. Just for that last barb, he can suffer with his dumb blonde bird lady. Sucking in our gut? Who's sucking in their gut? Not us! We're not a whole eight pounds past the standard, no way! We haven't let ourselves go that much. Lies and slander, all of it. Complete nonsense, you'll see!


I Couldn't Figure Out How to Add the Snowman Attack to My Post I'm A Failure I'm Sorry

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[Snow-Like-Snowmen Meditation]

"That's one stylish snowman now," Calm Reed says. "I'm sure the gods of this holiday are pleased." She may be making an assumption or two here. "Is this an effigy for one of them in particular?"

The Cold Never Bothered Laz Anyway?

Fidelia smiles as Jenette relinquishes the fabulous-looking, albeit slightly-crushed, sombrero, putting in place their work's piece-de-resistance. "I'm sure Kit will appreciate your sacrifice." the squire reassures, taking the moment to look at Mr. Harington's new attire with a proud little smirk. Fidelia blinks for a second as Calm Reed makes a couple assumptions, turning towards her with some confusion. "I... um, don't think there are any? R-right, Jen?" She wasn't actually too sure, now that Reed mentioned it....

"What, you've really never heard the legend of Vespa Rattata?" It's not Vespa Rattata, it's pronounced...actually, y'know what? Nevermind. Continue your story, Saint Laz. Tell us all the wondrous story of the Vespa Rattata and the First Thanksmasnewyearskwanzakkah.

"Long ago, in an ancient land, winter was not a time of celebration and joy at all, but of war and terror. The major holidays vied for supremacy, all insisting their way was the only way, that the people of this world could only be permitted but one crass, overly commercialized winter solstice holiday. The Tarkhans of Thanks, the Masmughans of Mass, the Nawab of New Years, Great Khan Kwanz, and the Admirals of Akkah spent this season locked in an endless battle, a bloodthirsty campaign, a horrifying War on (what we would later call) Thanksmas!

This war went on for many a decade, until one day, a humble bard in blue decided he'd had enough. There were just too many holidays to keep track of! He couldn't make any money singing carols at the tavern; any holiday song he sung would be seen as a call to arms by the supporters of the other holidays, and everyone knows bar fights, while very fun, are terrible for making money! So Vespa Rattata called in all of his other bard buddies and AMEN and HALO and got the whole wide world together, and he introduced them to his newest and greatest idea, Thanksmasnewyearskwanzakkah! An all-inclusive winter holiday extravaganza combining the best of everything, a Yule that everyone could enjoy, even if their winter solstice festivity technically wasn't in the name!

The warlords didn't like that at all, but by then it was too late. Vespa's idea was already too popular, and his ascension to godhood had already begun. Overflowing with cosmic energy, Vespa Rattata asked everyone to lend him their Thanksmas Spirit Energy, and with all that raw power coursing through his body, he unhinged his jaw and let out a great big BWAAAAAH and fired a laser beam that wiped out all those stupid zealots and their dumb feud forever and ever. Nobody missed them and everyone lived happily ever after. The end."

...Jenette, that was hands-down, easily the worst story I've ever heard. I regret giving you permission to tell it. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought or the actual truth. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may the gods have mercy on your soul.


Beer Goggles

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[More at 11!]

Krystal nods, grinning. Yep, that's the guy. Hilariously bad. Love listening to his ravings.

She figured that a shoulder pat would be bad, given his distaste for contact. Might be able to work him up to it eventually. But not yet.

Krystal nods a bit, smiling. Thank you, Malice. Seriously. That means a lot.

And now I know that if I want compliments from you, I just have to get you really, really drunk. She grins at him.

"Hey now, I specified dangerously drunk. Dangerously so! You're too much of a goodie two-shoes to put an innocent life in mortal peril just so someone will tell you you're pretty!" Malice backpedals, trying to take back as much of what he just said as he can before Krystal can start scheming and plotting something sneaky and sly. That said, 'an innocent life?' Are we talking about the same cyborg here, Malice? Last I checked, you were very much the opposite of innocent. In fact, you were so very not innocent, your name was Lord Malice. Is that not the case anymore?

[Murkus]

[Batu and Div]

Batu leans into Div contentedly a bit.

"I don't know what I'd like to be called by my boyfriend, so I suppose I'll just trust your creativity on that," he says, then looks down at his gift. He gives the orb a good shake. It seems to show a large expanse of tents and huts in a snowy forest. "They seem to be getting along well enough."

[Batu and Div]

Div takes a moment to look into the orb as well, standing quietly with Batu. "I'm not sure I would like living inside of a glass ball, but it does look peaceful." The Frescot leans in and kisses Batu on his cheek. "So I am thinking, should I get you something as well? Would that be, er, polite?"

[KerfuffleMach2]

[Drinking Buddies]

Krystal gives a wide grin. She's already planning something, isn't she?

First? I don't believe that you don't have some kind of system to make sure you can't die of alcohol poisoning. Seems like an obvious thing for a cyborg to have.

Second? I have an insane healing factor. Takes a huge amount of alcohol to get me drunk. I can drink you under the table any day.

She chuckles a bit before looking around a little. Well, party seems to be winding down a bit, huh?

[Morty]

[Batu and Div]

Batu blushes and smiles.

"If you want. I don't want to pressure you or anything, but if you see something you'd like to get me..." He looks into the ball again. "I don't know where they are, really. Santa just said that looking into this ball can show me someone I'm thinking about."

[Snowman Empowerment Meditation]

Calm Reed's expression subtly shifts from curiosity to bewilderment to amusement. St. Laz seems to have spun this tale on the spot, which has never been the stoic monk's talent.

"Fascinating," she says with great solemnity. "Did his final form after he ascended have a carrot nose as well? Or did he have many forms? The more powerful gods often do."

[Gullara]

[Icy Pond]

Adir laughs, giving them both a little shake, but his voice is calm. "I said I've got you! Don't be scared."

Sakura might find herself suddenly being pulled from the ice! Adir tries to scoop her into his arms for a moment so she doesn't have to skitter so skittishly. He puffs out soft, frosty breaths, and remains balanced even with the extra weight. Adir has been having plenty of trouble with his clumsy new body these last few months. He definitely shouldn't be this confident on the ice...

His voice is at once kindly and gently goading. He teases, "Do you want to stop? I don't mind just sitting and drinking cocoa you know." His expression smooths out a little bit, becomes gentler without that dumb smirk. "I just thought it would be like dancing. You remember when we were going to learn how to dance?" That idea went away with the vast majority of their free time when they started having kids. The stag gets a dreamy look on his face, thinking on all of that.

[Icy Pond]

"I don't mind trying." Sakura says, trying to stand herself more stable, while still holding onto Adir's arms. "This isn't really like dancing, though. Dancing never feels this awkward." She reasons, as her left foot starts to slide toward Adir. Her fingers dig into her arm as she starts to lose her balance all over again.

[Recaiden]

[Raril and Son]

Raril will gladly give Nadas a microbead. "Gods, how old are you?" He wonders, looking dumbstruck. "By my reckoning you should only be like fifteen, but the nexus time flow compared to Menzoberranzan aged you up quite a bit."

"It certainly seems to have been at least a little bit longer than that." Nadas admits. But of course he can't precisely answer.
Fifteen? And for an elf that should be even younger, right? He's definitely not still a kid.

[Ashen Lilies]

[Drow, some other things]

"But... what is a knight?" Yasril asks. Explain these silly surface concepts!

[Tieflings]

"I'll share a drink with you." Says Kal, smiling.

[Elfsnowmanpocalypse!]

Whoops. That's very unfortunate.

"Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!" Rain calls out, apologizing to each of the snowmen that the two of them run over. Anika's wild ride is not as cheerful as initially advertised!

Snowman corpses. Everywhere. T_T

[Morty]

[Drow, some other things]

Iknika's ears twitch.

"Ooooh. I didn't know you didn't know. But neither did I, until Lady Eschelle told me," she says. "Knights are a warriors who wear heavy armor and fight with honor and courage. Usually to defend the honor of their lord, lady or country. Our friend Koshal has a lady he serves."

[Tieflings]

As Fayyaad leads Kal towards the drink tables, he turns to introduce himself with a slight flourish.

"My name is Fayyaad ibn-Haashid al-Zafar," he says. "But just Fayyaad will do. I come from the land of Moran-Ir and the illustrious Zafar family. Though I am currently taking something of an extended vacation."

[Earl of Purple]

Human and Humanoids, and Wolves

"My dad was a knight, but his title was purely ceremonial. A knight-scholar, which was awarded for his magical achievements. Basically, he set up a school to teach magic, a very successful one, and his reward from the King was elevation into the lowest rank of the nobility. But knights started as elite cavalry selected from the nobility, with all the best equipment and training. Things just... Evolved." As magic spread, knights found it didn't matter how many of them charged the weird guy in robes- they weren't likely to survive the magical blast the weird guy was about to throw. Cannons also helped change the meaning of knights, since they proved quite effective at killing them, too.

[Shadowcaller]

[Elfsnowmanpocalypse!]

The snowmanity!

The bear would excuse itself but all it can manage are growls that not even other bears would understand.
Finally, she stops as it seems the reindeer got the better of her after she had to attempt to dodge all those snowmen, with empathize on attempt.
Slowly sitting down, she will turn back into her humanoid form, making sure that Rain doesn't just fall off when she suddenly shrinks down to a 'mere' 7 foot in height. "Aw, geez, I got caught up in the moment again. Those poor snowlings." She says as she turns to face the battlefield she left behind. "I guess I should apologize." She didn't sound too sure though, she wasn't even sure who she should apologize to, those goblin kids? Goblins could sue her for everything she owned!
Then she turns to Rain. "You know any, uhm, fitting funeral tunes? For the snowmen I mean." That's very silly Anika.

[Gnrlshrimp]

[Kraken not Krampus!]

A suitably joyful Suzie takes her gifts and skips merrily on her way. It's nice when things work out well, and having matching outfits will surely be a valuable asset in her impending villainous conquests! All exactly as she had planned!

*****

[MagChanging Room]

Ithuriel chuckles. "Did I hear that right? "Firmware upgrades"? Really?" Ithuriel laughs, turning away from Magtok to help him preserve his decency...whatever's left after the two-pronged verbal assault from Ithuriel and Ambriel anyway.

"Don't let him get to you though, Magtok. You seem to be doing pretty well for yourself, right? Your, uh, current companion looks like quite a catch." Definitely not a jab at how often Magtok rotates between girlfriends. Nope.

[Felandria]

[Santa and the Xar'Chas]

Sornnolu thinks. "I'd like one of those... book tablet things? Supposedly you could keep a whole library's worth of books on them. The thing is, it should be magic based, not electronic, though. The palace doesn't have much in the way of proper electricity. Not yet, anyways." Now he'd have a place to keep all his spellbooks, and more recreational reading, and no one would be able to tell which he was reading, either.

I’d be delighted to give you one of those, Sornnolu.

Fel reaches into the bag and pulls out a tablet.

I think you’ll see that the magic should keep your battery going for a very long time indeed, and it’s preloaded with many, many really neat books.

I actually have one myself and it’s wonderful, especially for keeping up with my list.

[Arkhosia]

Spoiler

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I Couldn't Figure Out How to Add the Snowman Attack to My Post I'm A Failure I'm Sorry

"What, you've really never heard the legend of Vespa Rattata?" It's not Vespa Rattata, it's pronounced...actually, y'know what? Nevermind. Continue your story, Saint Laz. Tell us all the wondrous story of the Vespa Rattata and the First Thanksmasnewyearskwanzakkah.

"Long ago, in an ancient land, winter was not a time of celebration and joy at all, but of war and terror. The major holidays vied for supremacy, all insisting their way was the only way, that the people of this world could only be permitted but one crass, overly commercialized winter solstice holiday. The Tarkhans of Thanks, the Masmughans of Mass, the Nawab of New Years, Great Khan Kwanz, and the Admirals of Akkah spent this season locked in an endless battle, a bloodthirsty campaign, a horrifying War on (what we would later call) Thanksmas!

This war went on for many a decade, until one day, a humble bard in blue decided he'd had enough. There were just too many holidays to keep track of! He couldn't make any money singing carols at the tavern; any holiday song he sung would be seen as a call to arms by the supporters of the other holidays, and everyone knows bar fights, while very fun, are terrible for making money! So Vespa Rattata called in all of his other bard buddies and AMEN and HALO and got the whole wide world together, and he introduced them to his newest and greatest idea, Thanksmasnewyearskwanzakkah! An all-inclusive winter holiday extravaganza combining the best of everything, a Yule that everyone could enjoy, even if their winter solstice festivity technically wasn't in the name!

The warlords didn't like that at all, but by then it was too late. Vespa's idea was already too popular, and his ascension to godhood had already begun. Overflowing with cosmic energy, Vespa Rattata asked everyone to lend him their Thanksmas Spirit Energy, and with all that raw power coursing through his body, he unhinged his jaw and let out a great big BWAAAAAH and fired a laser beam that wiped out all those stupid zealots and their dumb feud forever and ever. Nobody missed them and everyone lived happily ever after. The end."

...Jenette, that was hands-down, easily the worst story I've ever heard. I regret giving you permission to tell it. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought or the actual truth. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may the gods have mercy on your soul.

[Snowman Empowerment Meditation]

Calm Reed's expression subtly shifts from curiosity to bewilderment to amusement. St. Laz seems to have spun this tale on the spot, which has never been the stoic monk's talent.

"Fascinating," she says with great solemnity. "Did his final form after he ascended have a carrot nose as well? Or did he have many forms? The more powerful gods often do."

The Thanksmas Chronicles

All things considered, it's not the worst story ever told. There's action, a fairly concise level of exposition, and St. Lazarus tells it wonderfully! It's a shame that it's not very believable - "Really?"

Oh Fidelia, just because you're a little uneducated doesn't mean you have to be gullible too! "I didn't know that Thanksmas had such a storied origin, that's really cool to learn about." The squire comments with a smile, her evergreen eyes bright with interest. "Are there any other neat traditions that the holiday has?"

[Lord Magtok]

Ra Ra Rasputin

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[Drinking Buddies]

Krystal gives a wide grin. She's already planning something, isn't she?

First? I don't believe that you don't have some kind of system to make sure you can't die of alcohol poisoning. Seems like an obvious thing for a cyborg to have.

Second? I have an insane healing factor. Takes a huge amount of alcohol to get me drunk. I can drink you under the table any day.

She chuckles a bit before looking around a little. Well, party seems to be winding down a bit, huh?

"Yep, looks like everyone else is nearly done here. I should probably head back soon; I have that important thing I was going to do, the-" Malice frowns. He's become someone else's background character, hasn't he? The wacky roommate occasionally seen every now and then, while Krystal does all the cool action stuff the audience is really after. How did this happen? Why did we let it happen? Is it too late to do anything about it?

"Actually, you don't need help with your NERD thing, do you? A mole in a slaver organization, maybe? Mole embedded in an organized crime family? I could install Grigori's robot spider legs and challenge your new recruits to a sparring match against a giant stilt-legged necromantic head in a jar?" That'd certainly be one way to prepare fresh heroes and heroines for the unexpected.


There Was a Cat That Really Was Gone

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[Snowman Empowerment Meditation]

Calm Reed's expression subtly shifts from curiosity to bewilderment to amusement. St. Laz seems to have spun this tale on the spot, which has never been the stoic monk's talent.

"Fascinating," she says with great solemnity. "Did his final form after he ascended have a carrot nose as well? Or did he have many forms? The more powerful gods often do."

The Thanksmas Chronicles

All things considered, it's not the worst story ever told. There's action, a fairly concise level of exposition, and St. Lazarus tells it wonderfully! It's a shame that it's not very believable - "Really?"

Oh Fidelia, just because you're a little uneducated doesn't mean you have to be gullible too! "I didn't know that Thanksmas had such a storied origin, that's really cool to learn about." The squire comments with a smile, her evergreen eyes bright with interest. "Are there any other neat traditions that the holiday has?"

"Well, there's also some stories that say Vespa didn't ascend, and just naturally had those kinds of powers as an elven lord of time and Magtok's boyfriend, but those ones don't make any sense at all. Magtok hates elves and only dates catgirls; everyone knows that."

Saint Lazarus, you worthless traitor. I thought we were on the same side. In fact, just for that, I'm retroactively saying the snowman was hit by the recklessly speeding nutcases that zoomed by after all!

"Well, I guess he made an exception for an ant that one time, but-wait, hey guys, where's the snowman?" It was right here a moment ago, right? Right behind where Saint Lazarus was telling her story, oblivious to the world around her and the chaos unfolding as poor Jon Snow(man) was bowled over and flattened by a wayward maniac.


Russia's Greatest Love Machine

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[MagChanging Room]

Ithuriel chuckles. "Did I hear that right? "Firmware upgrades"? Really?" Ithuriel laughs, turning away from Magtok to help him preserve his decency...whatever's left after the two-pronged verbal assault from Ithuriel and Ambriel anyway.

"Don't let him get to you though, Magtok. You seem to be doing pretty well for yourself, right? Your, uh, current companion looks like quite a catch." Definitely not a jab at how often Magtok rotates between girlfriends. Nope.

"Soon as I finish saving the entire world and all the ungrateful asses in it I'll have her and a death goddess. You'll still be just a glorified cop with wings and your pet birdman will still be a wanted terrorist. How's that going, anyway? You figure out how you're going to reconcile your saintly image with his morally ambiguous greater gooding?" Magtok scowls, jingling and jangling as he finishes changing into the awful elf costume. It's a little tighter around the hips than he'd like; curse them and their ability to craft a costume exactly the right size to make him hate them all the more!

[Morty]

[Revelation of Snowmen Hunch]

"Well, I didn't know that," Calm Reed says. "As I haven't heard about this Magtok yet. Is he some sort of-" The monk looks around for the snowman. "It seems to have been knocked down by a bear... who is in fact our fellow Vigil member, Anika."

[Zefir]

[What tag was it?]

Ixen remain waiting. It migth be that the others have already left, but she waits. She feels a bit sad as the snowpeople got destroyed, but since she didn#t build one herself she has no close affection to them.

[Gnrlshrimp]

[The Fairest MagElf in All the Land]

Ithuriel gives Ambriel a look. While there's no way she's going to admit that to Magtok's face, he has kind of raised a point there. Some sort of discussion needs to happen. But that's for later. The focus right now is on tormenting Magtok. "Costume a bit tight, Magtok? I had to use Ambriel's measurements when I was out looking for it, but I figured since he's just some dumb winged clone of yours, it was bound to be a perfect fit, right?"

Hopefully Wings doesn't take that jab at Mags as a jab at him as well.

"C'mon, let's get you back to her before she freaks out too badly. And I promise not to point out to her that you talked about her like she's just an object to collect along with others." She waves a hand to open a path back to the scene of the kidnapping. "And if you are somehow serious about having to save the world and promise not to threaten my city again, I'd be happy to help."