The Order of the Stick: Utterly Dwarfed
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  1. - Top - End - #901
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jul 2008

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    You succeed at showing him all of the bardic knowledge you have! (Spoiler: You're not a bard.)

    I roll to vomit all over the coffee table.
    Leo, Ajax, Deshy, Cutty.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  2. - Top - End - #902
    Barbarian in the Playground
    Join Date
    Aug 2018

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    Quote Originally Posted by Dr.Gunsforhands View Post
    I roll to vomit all over the coffee table.
    The table is now the cleanest surface in all the universe and even the multiverse.

    I roll to eat off the this divine table.

  3. - Top - End - #903
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

    Join Date
    Jan 2019
    Location
    Gallifrey (Or Hyrule)
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    The table devours you whole. (A carnivorous table...I hope it doesn't want seconds...)

    I roll to play hopscotch.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  4. - Top - End - #904
    Barbarian in the Playground
    Join Date
    Aug 2018

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    Quote Originally Posted by CyberiadQueen View Post
    I roll to play hopscotch.
    The hopscotch grid comes to line, turns you into a 2D object, places you on the ground, and hopscotches you.

    I roll to cut the Gordian Knot.

  5. - Top - End - #905
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Celticbear's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Location
    R'lyeh
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    Quote Originally Posted by Magic_Hat View Post
    I roll to cut the Gordian Knot.
    See, you rolled a one, and Alexander just happened to walk in right at that time. Not one for losing, he cut you and the Gordian Knot in half at the same time with his anime Macedonian powers.

    I roll for Initiative!
    Last edited by Celticbear; 2019-09-18 at 05:55 PM. Reason: I spelled "Macedonian" as "roman" for some reason
    "I'M just a guy with a boomerang... I didn't ask for all this flying... and MAGIC!!!" -Sokka

    Avatar by AsteriskAmp

    Quote Originally Posted by Wuff View Post
    the biggest nerd ever who transforms into BEAR is of course alluring.

  6. - Top - End - #906
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

    Join Date
    Jan 2019
    Location
    Gallifrey (Or Hyrule)
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    Quote Originally Posted by Celticbear View Post
    See, you rolled a one, and Alexander just happened to walk in right at that time. Not one for losing, he cut you and the Gordian Knot in half at the same time with his anime roman powers.
    Pretty nifty trick for a Macedonian to have anime Roman powers.

    Quote Originally Posted by Celticbear View Post
    I roll for Initiative!
    Initiative becomes a sentient entity, and decides it wants no part of you.

    I roll to become a great astrologer.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  7. - Top - End - #907
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jul 2008

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    You become a pretty okay astronomer! Years into your academic career, you start asking one of your colleagues when you're supposed to start writing horoscopes and stuff. She thinks you're joking.

    I roll to punch the monkey!
    Leo, Ajax, Deshy, Cutty.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  8. - Top - End - #908
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Imp

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Ubiquitous
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    The monkey judo flips you into the crocodile pits.

    I roll a strength check to open a can of salsa.
    This is a boring signature.
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES
    EXPLODED RUNES
    PICTURE OF A CAT
    EXPLOSIVE RUNES

  9. - Top - End - #909
    Barbarian in the Playground
    Join Date
    Aug 2018

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    Quote Originally Posted by Korith View Post
    I roll a strength check to open a can of salsa.
    The can of salsa remains closed and you tear your pants.

    I roll to stitch up Korith's split pants.

  10. - Top - End - #910
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Dr.Gunsforhands's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jul 2008

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    You seem to succeed, but as soon as Korith wears them out in public, they disintegrate into a fine powder.

    I roll to make an incorruptible wish!
    Leo, Ajax, Deshy, Cutty.
    Avatar by the Ninja Chocobo.

  11. - Top - End - #911
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Dire Moose's Avatar

    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    Location
    Arizona
    Gender
    Intersex

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    You wish to be turned into a toad. It happens.

    I roll to think of a good Halloween costume.
    LGBTitp
    Genderfluid AMAB, hence the gender symbol. I switch as it suits me.

  12. - Top - End - #912
    Barbarian in the Playground
    Join Date
    Aug 2018

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    Quote Originally Posted by Dire Moose View Post
    I roll to think of a good Halloween costume.
    You end up thinking of nothing and just go as yourself. But people still seem to think it's a costume - someone else dressed as you - and you somehow manage to win first place in a costume contest and get a lot of candy.

    I roll to dress up as Dire Moose next year for Halloween. Hopefully not too many other people are planning on doing that as well.

  13. - Top - End - #913
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    DruidGirl

    Join Date
    Jan 2019
    Location
    Gallifrey (Or Hyrule)
    Gender
    Female

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    You manage to dress up as Korith, instead.

    I roll to host a Halloween forum fashion show, so I can cash in on everybody's costumes.
    Love is the ultimate trip. --Micky Dolenz

    Rest in Peace, Peter Tork
    February 13, 1942-February 21, 2019
    Men are Mortal
    Music lives Forever

    #LiberateHongKong

  14. - Top - End - #914
    Barbarian in the Playground
    Join Date
    Aug 2018

    Default Re: The “Rolled a 1” Game II: Critical Fail

    Quote Originally Posted by CyberiadQueen View Post
    I roll to host a Halloween forum fashion show, so I can cash in on everybody's costumes.
    You plan it, but because of bad time management skills it's pushed back until February 14th so when you do crash it it's just a bunch of people making out. Everyone is in costume though.

    I roll to plan a Valentine's Day party to see when my bad time management skills get it

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