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    Bugbear in the Playground
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    Default Favorite Battleship Movies?

    Any good movies out there take place on a 20th century Battleship? Any decent movies about Warspite or I guess even Turpitz or Bizmarck or Scharnhorst or Hood? Perhaps even a Jutland movie worth seeing?

    Oh! The Grand Old Lady, HMS Warspite! You could span both world wars with that one and have sccesses and failures.

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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    Battleship, obviously. You'll never see a battleship drifting like it's Fast and Furious in another movie.
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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    20th century? I can't think of any that aren't Michael Bay or Bay-ish things.

    Some really great submarine movies, and excellent age of sails works -- love Master and Commander and The Sea Hawk.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Narkis View Post
    Battleship, obviously. You'll never see a battleship drifting like it's Fast and Furious in another movie.
    Okay, technically a destroyer and not a battleship, but....

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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    Well, there's this that takes place on a battleship, and for bonus points has Erika Eleniak busting out of a cake, but it's probably not what you were thinking of...

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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    Quote Originally Posted by Saintheart View Post
    Well, there's this that takes place on a battleship, and for bonus points has Erika Eleniak busting out of a cake, but it's probably not what you were thinking of...
    Sadly, I think that actually might be the best you're likely to get.

    Hollywood's pretty bad at war movies these days, and has been for a while. They like the spectacle of warfare explosions and gunfire and screaming and extras getting killed in the background but they don't like going into any depth.
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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    Right, I had to work out that you meant the century that started 1901 and ended 1999 or there abouts.

    I don't think there are many that take place on a battleship. There are films about battleships, but most of them are seen from outside, though there are probably a few shots of on-board life.

    For shipboard life there's "The pink submarine" or The Cruel Sea", but the ships involved aren't battleships.

    There's "Sink the Bismark" but I don't remember whether there are any shots on a mockup of part of the ship. There's also "Battle of the River Plate" but the ships aren't battleships.

    There's probably a comedy set on a battleship, but I don't remember one.

    There are dozens of war films, possibly hundreds, I don't remember titles well at all.
    The end of what Son? The story? There is no end. There's just the point where the storytellers stop talking.

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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    Quote Originally Posted by halfeye View Post
    There's "Sink the Bismark" but I don't remember whether there are any shots on a mockup of part of the ship.
    There are certainly shots showing the captains of the various ships involved on their bridge, but don't think there's a huge amount else. Thinking about it, it's not a battleship, but "The Final Countdown" was filmed mostly aboard the nuclear powered aircraft carrier USS Nimitz.

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    Quote Originally Posted by MarkVIIIMarc View Post
    Any good movies out there take place on a 20th century Battleship? Any decent movies about Warspite or I guess even Turpitz or Bizmarck or Scharnhorst or Hood? Perhaps even a Jutland movie worth seeing?

    Oh! The Grand Old Lady, HMS Warspite! You could span both world wars with that one and have sccesses and failures.
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    Quote Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien, 1955
    I thought Tom Bombadil dreadful but worse still was the announcer's preliminary remarks that Goldberry was his daughter (!), and that Willowman was an ally of Mordor (!!).

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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    I mean, "Space Battleship Yamato" (aka:Star Blazers) takes place on a battleship named after a real battleship in the time period in question.

    It's also great.

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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    This is going even further away from a Battleship but Das Boot is maybe the greatest war movie I've ever seen

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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    If we're branching out to 'naval movies' in general, Down Periscope is still a laugh riot.
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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    Quote Originally Posted by comicshorse View Post
    This is going even further away from a Battleship but Das Boot is maybe the greatest war movie I've ever seen

    https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0082096...4?ref_=nv_sr_4
    I was going to recommend this one.

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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    Filming at sea is expensive, which imposes serious limitations on the ability to produce naval movies. Submarines are slightly easier because for the most part it is impossible for the audience to determine if a submarine is actually at sea, and therefore you can use a decommissioned sub that's just sitting somewhere (portions of The Hunt for Red October were filmed onboard the USS Blueback, which is sitting in the river in Portland, OR).
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rysto View Post
    Okay, technically a destroyer and not a battleship, but....
    I thought that was going to be the dream sequence from "in the navy" (which I can't find).

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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    Submarines aren't battleships, but Das Boot is riveting. Sure, some of the effects doesn't hold up so well in modern times, but it's still very effective in my opinion.
    Going back further than the 20th Century, I'm a big fan of Master and Commander: The Far Side of the World. It's really too bad they never made another.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mechalich View Post
    Filming at sea is expensive, which imposes serious limitations on the ability to produce naval movies. Submarines are slightly easier because for the most part it is impossible for the audience to determine if a submarine is actually at sea, and therefore you can use a decommissioned sub that's just sitting somewhere (portions of The Hunt for Red October were filmed onboard the USS Blueback, which is sitting in the river in Portland, OR).
    Anything to stop them from using a decommissioned battleship and just digitally editing things though? I can't imagine a contemporary battleship movie would cost more than, say, Titanic. Especially with the deal studios get with the American military so long as they portray them positively.

    There was even that television show Michael Bay did... The Last Ship. That seemed to have an actual ship in it, and that was for TNT.

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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    There were a whole bunch of warship films made in the 1940s and 1950s, I heard mainly using models in big tanks.
    The end of what Son? The story? There is no end. There's just the point where the storytellers stop talking.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kitten Champion View Post
    Anything to stop them from using a decommissioned battleship and just digitally editing things though? I can't imagine a contemporary battleship movie would cost more than, say, Titanic. Especially with the deal studios get with the American military so long as they portray them positively.
    Well, that's how they made Battleship, but they didn't have any good way to show the ship moving in actual water, which imposed major restrictions on the action (one of many reasons why that movie was terrible).

    There was even that television show Michael Bay did... The Last Ship. That seemed to have an actual ship in it, and that was for TNT.
    I don't know how much naval action was actually shown in that show. I do know that the pirate show Black Sails spends an awful lot of time on land for cost-related reasons.
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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    Quote Originally Posted by Kitten Champion View Post
    Anything to stop them from using a decommissioned battleship and just digitally editing things though? I can't imagine a contemporary battleship movie would cost more than, say, Titanic.
    It's worth noting that Titanic was the most expensive film in history until Avatar came along.

    It was a gigantic risk for James Cameron. There was a huge amount of doom and gloom ahead of the movie saying its budget had been completely blown and that it was doomed to be a flop and a massive loss for the studio. That it didn't do so in spite of that massive propaganda problem (and that Avatar didn't do so under an even trickier genre) proves that James Cameron is either the luckiest or one of the greatest directors in Western history based on audience numbers.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Saintheart View Post
    Well, there's this that takes place on a battleship, and for bonus points has Erika Eleniak busting out of a cake, but it's probably not what you were thinking of...
    Not totally what I was asking for but thanks for reminding me about that one. Not the WORST of movies and Erika Eleniak like you were kind enough to remind me about.

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    Default Re: Favorite Battleship Movies?

    Quote Originally Posted by Narkis View Post
    Battleship, obviously. You'll never see a battleship drifting like it's Fast and Furious in another movie.
    That doesn't sound right, but I don't know enough about ships to dispute it.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Saintheart View Post
    It's worth noting that Titanic was the most expensive film in history until Avatar came along.

    It was a gigantic risk for James Cameron. There was a huge amount of doom and gloom ahead of the movie saying its budget had been completely blown and that it was doomed to be a flop and a massive loss for the studio. That it didn't do so in spite of that massive propaganda problem (and that Avatar didn't do so under an even trickier genre) proves that James Cameron is either the luckiest or one of the greatest directors in Western history based on audience numbers.
    It actually wasn't just one studio, but two (Paramount and 20th century iirc) risking to sink with the ship.
    Quote Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien, 1955
    I thought Tom Bombadil dreadful but worse still was the announcer's preliminary remarks that Goldberry was his daughter (!), and that Willowman was an ally of Mordor (!!).

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    Quote Originally Posted by Peelee View Post
    That doesn't sound right, but I don't know enough about ships to dispute it.
    Well, the USS Missouri weghts 41.000 tons, which probably means around 50-55.000 tons full. That should explain the sheer impossibility of

    a- bringing it to an almost full stop with a simple anchor in a matter of seconds. The most reasonable outcome would just be that the anchor would snap like a thread.

    b- turning it sideways using the anchor as a pin. Even if the chain didn't break, the anchor would just drag along the ocean floor. And even if (somehow) it did manage to stop the ship, the bow of a vessel like that is not intended for that type of sideway force and would likely break off.

    Really, 50.000+ tons weight an awful lot :)
    Last edited by Jan Mattys; 2019-11-17 at 02:19 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Jan Mattys View Post
    Well, the USS Missouri weghts 41.000 tons, which probably means around 50-55.000 tons full. That should explain the sheer impossibility of

    a- bringing it to an almost full stop with a simple anchor in a matter of seconds. The most reasonable outcome would just be that the anchor would snap like a thread.

    b- turning it sideways using the anchor as a pin. Even if the chain didn't break, the anchor would just drag along the ocean floor. And even if (somehow) it did manage to stop the ship, the bow of a vessel like that is not intended for that type of sideway force and would likely break off.

    Really, 50.000+ tons weight an awful lot :)
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    Quote Originally Posted by Peelee View Post
    I knew I should have said stars instead.
    Uh, sorry, I took that literally. Im from Italy and that quote was completely lost on me. I dont even know the name of the show.

    edit: ok, looked it up. It's Always Sunny and of course I heard about it. But I never saw a single episode. Sorry again
    Last edited by Jan Mattys; 2019-11-17 at 02:58 AM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Peelee View Post
    That doesn't sound right, but I don't know enough about ships to dispute it.
    It would be a forgivable "for fun"offense. Unfortunately it's packed inside a movie about the whiniest little **** you have ever seen who had everything in life handed to him up to and including a ship to command and still thinks his loser ass deserves more. And when the movie finally gets going properly we're treated to a super hamfisted scene where they show us why procuring the rights of a board game to make this film was totally worth it.

    The Asylum ripoff of this movie, American Warships, is legitimately the better movie of the two of them. It's only half researched, has cheap effects and gives us a second in command skipping around happily because against all military protocols she's so in love with the skipper, but it's a movie about a friggin battleship, portrayed by a friggin battleship. The Asylum knew who the star of their battleship movie should be, namely the battleship, the makers of the infinitely more expensive Battleship did not. Hence a movie about a whiny little **** in the wrong kind of ship playing an extra large board game.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lvl 2 Expert View Post
    but it's a movie about a friggin battleship, portrayed by a friggin battleship. The Asylum knew who the star of their battleship movie should be, namely the battleship, the makers of the infinitely more expensive Battleship did not.
    Fun fact: Battleship Potemkin contains a scene in which the battleship bombs the Odessa Opera House. The whole scene shows no humans. There are only the cannons, the gates of the theatre blowing up, and some dramatic shots of a few lion sculptures. The scene unnerved many actors, because it was clear that you could make a whole film without actors, and make objects play instead of them. Add to this that films were still mute, so voice-overs were simply not possible.
    Quote Originally Posted by J.R.R. Tolkien, 1955
    I thought Tom Bombadil dreadful but worse still was the announcer's preliminary remarks that Goldberry was his daughter (!), and that Willowman was an ally of Mordor (!!).

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    Quote Originally Posted by Peelee View Post
    That doesn't sound right, but I don't know enough about ships to dispute it.
    I've read about a couple of similar tactics being used, and I doubt it would have snapped the bow off. Firing all guns was usually enough to shove an entire ship sideways, so the hull could take it. More likely to damage the capstan the anchor was on if anything. Oddly, the bigger question would be if the water was actually deep enough to generate sufficient drag by giving the anchor something to grab. Considering the size of the alien ship I wouldn't think so...
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    Yamato (2005)
    The only "fighting battleship" movie I've seen, where the ship actually looks like it's supposed to.

    Back when movies of this sort were popular, they didn't have CGI to make it look correct. Sink the Bismark was pretty good, and I also like The Battle of the River Plate, but a Des Moines Cruiser, masquerading as the Graf Spee is just embarrassing to all navies involved.
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