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  1. - Top - End - #1
    Titan in the Playground
     
    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Planetary School Factions(Comedy) IC Thread

    http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showt...03#post5115903

    The Planet of Schkrudup was a mess. YOU are to clean it up. Could you rise up to establish planetary, and interstellar domination one day? Only time will tell. Each faction is now planning to either do away with the others, or to assimilate them, somehow. The Acadamian Security Commission, once called the Acadamian Security Comittee, now controls an arctic subregion to the south east of the other factions.

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    PirateCaptain

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    Default Re: Planetary School Factions(Comedy) IC Thread

    'Nightbringer' Freddy Deathblitz sat on his throne of chrome skulls. What looked like blood, but was actually prune juice ran down from the arms into the floor, which was a huge stone slab with a red pentagram symbol in the middle. The rise of the Goths was at hand and he would lead his 'covens' to victory over the other races. He let out a long and structured evil laugh that echoed around his dark island fortress. He had been practising.

    "Instruct the coven leaders to meet with me in my stronghold." He said to one of his many servants. Bowing, the servant quickly left the throne room and went about summoning the coven leaders to the Goth headquarters.
    Last edited by Blockhead; 2008-10-16 at 05:12 PM.
    I drew this line myself

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    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    charl's Avatar

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    Default Re: Planetary School Factions(Comedy) IC Thread

    Kyle McCoy parked his van in the middle of the field. Soon hundreds of other cars, station wagons and other vehicles had parked on the field in a chaotic manner. McCoy reached into the glove compartment and pulled out a map. Then he got out of his car and put the map on the hood of the nearest vehicle.
    His deputies gathered around him. Soon all the thirteen clan leaders of the Snowbird tribe has assembled in a circle, huddling together studying the map with serious faces.
    After about five minutes, Pierre of the Acadien clan said: "Ah, oui, I see what did wrong d'ere! We took how you say a right turn at 'zis corner, when we should have gone left." He pointed out on the map what he was referring too.
    Kyle snarled back: "No, Pierre, then we would have ended up on the '35 instead. What we should have done is turned right at this junction, and then followed the '48."
    Mixed sounds of "of course!" "I told you so." and "we should have gotten a better map, ey" came from the clan leaders.
    "All right, everyone, back in your cars!" Kyle commanded. Damnit, at this pace they would never be able to dominate this planet properly.

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    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    PirateCaptain

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    Default Re: Planetary School Factions(Comedy) IC Thread

    The servant made some calls via a mobile phone, nodded, then moved to the large pentagram in the middle of the room. He ordered a few of the other servants around the sides of the halls to assist him in the summoning ritual. The servants positioned themselves at each point on the pentagram, closing their eyes and holding their arms in the direction on the inscribed star. The lead servant began chanting and the other servants joined in, getting louder and faster as time progressed. The pentagram beginned to glow bright red. Suddenly the pentagram erupted in wall of red light. The light blocked view of the inside of the pentagram for a few seconds, then the light faded, revealing about a dozen overdressed, overpierced and over zealous people.

    "Ah! My children! So glad you could make it." Said Deathblitz. The dozen goth leaders dropped to a knee and all said at once: "We live to serve the darkness: the Nightbringer." "That you do." Replied Deathblitz as he rose from his throne and walked over to the pentagram and his summoned leaders. "I have summoned you hear to discuss my plans to finally bring this planet under Goth rule, to cover it in darkness, to slay the weak and enslave the strong! If you help me with this task I shall reward you richly. Fail me and... well... you know the price of failure." He quickly withdrew a scythe from inside his trenchcoat and swung it at the nearest leader, stopping inches from his neck. "Now go! I shall contact you individually later!" "We do as the Nightbringer wills." Came the reply of the leaders as the servants began sending them back to their place of origin.

    "My king commands such respect from his followers." Came a voice from the shadows of the throne room. "They obey me, or they die. You know this better than anyone, my queen." Rose, the Goth queen stepped out of the shadows. Her hair was a long curl of brown, red, black and purple. She had thick white makeup with heavy black eyeliner. She wore a tight red corset over a long black dress which reached the floor. She had deepest red lipstick anyone could possibly imagine. "Leave us!" She commanded to the servants in the room. They all quickly left. "Does my king wish to discuss his plans with his queen?" She asked as she seductively walked up to Deathblitz. "In time, my queen." He replied. "But know that this world will be ours one day!" Rose wrapped her arms around Deathblitz' body, her pale skin showing the full effect of her dark red nail polish. "Yes! It will all be ours one day! Together." She said as Deathblitz turned to her. "Together." Deathblitz repeated as the pair embraced.
    Last edited by Blockhead; 2008-10-16 at 07:40 PM.
    I drew this line myself

  5. - Top - End - #5
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    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Planetary School Factions(Comedy) IC Thread

    Meanwhile, the SnowBirds are attacked by an army of ice cream truck drivers.... They are demanding purchases.....

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    Bugbear in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Planetary School Factions(Comedy) IC Thread

    Kyle of the clan McCoy, elected leader of all the clans of the Snowbird tribe, made his way between the parked cars, trying to find out what was blocking the way.
    "Another interruption. We can't keep stopping every hour. We have places to be." He muttered to himself as his people quickly made way for him and the twelve other clan leaders following in his footsteps.
    And then, he could see it. Hundreds of ice cream trucks had blocked the road, and the drivers standing outside trying desperately to sell their wares, to no avail. The Snowbird vanguard that had been driving in front just looked at the vendors with slightly confused looks on their faces.
    "Oh, for... What is this? Ice cream?! We are travelling to get away from the cold!"
    "May I make a suggestion, chief?" The speaker was Johnny of the Harper clan, one of the thirteen clan leaders. "We are running low on gas. If we send some of our trucks around the ice-cream trucks and encircle them, we could... liberate their gasoline. As well as any other valuables they might have."
    "As long as no one takes any effing ice cream." Kyle said. "It is a sound plan. What do you others say?"
    After some debate the clan leaders came to an agreement, and off-road worthy vehicles were dispatched to perform the encirclement. For distraction some of the younger tribesmen were sent to perform the noble sacrifice of pretending to want ice cream.
    "Now, hand me my moose hunting rifle." The weapon was presented to the tribal leader, who loaded it. "OK ice cream vendors." Kyle cocked the rifle, which made a very dramatic and threatening sound. "It's on!"

  7. - Top - End - #7
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    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Planetary School Factions(Comedy) IC Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Charl View Post
    Kyle of the clan McCoy, elected leader of all the clans of the Snowbird tribe, made his way between the parked cars, trying to find out what was blocking the way.
    "Another interruption. We can't keep stopping every hour. We have places to be." He muttered to himself as his people quickly made way for him and the twelve other clan leaders following in his footsteps.
    And then, he could see it. Hundreds of ice cream trucks had blocked the road, and the drivers standing outside trying desperately to sell their wares, to no avail. The Snowbird vanguard that had been driving in front just looked at the vendors with slightly confused looks on their faces.
    "Oh, for... What is this? Ice cream?! We are travelling to get away from the cold!"
    "May I make a suggestion, chief?" The speaker was Johnny of the Harper clan, one of the thirteen clan leaders. "We are running low on gas. If we send some of our trucks around the ice-cream trucks and encircle them, we could... liberate their gasoline. As well as any other valuables they might have."
    "As long as no one takes any effing ice cream." Kyle said. "It is a sound plan. What do you others say?"
    After some debate the clan leaders came to an agreement, and off-road worthy vehicles were dispatched to perform the encirclement. For distraction some of the younger tribesmen were sent to perform the noble sacrifice of pretending to want ice cream.
    "Now, hand me my moose hunting rifle." The weapon was presented to the tribal leader, who loaded it. "OK ice cream vendors." Kyle cocked the rifle, which made a very dramatic and threatening sound. "It's on!"
    Suddenly, a man with a heavy Germanic accent steps in front of the ice cream truck salesman, armed with a frost blasting weapon. "I'm back!" He says. The leader Snowbird should recognize him. Its Onald Zwordsedaggar! The famous film star turned Minister of Gold Sun Province.

  8. - Top - End - #8
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Planetary School Factions(Comedy) IC Thread

    Kyle sighs and raises his hand, telling his tribesmen to hold off on the assault.
    "And what do you want? Why would someone in your position be running around playing ice cream truck?"
    "Let's bash this idiot, ey." Johnny of the Harper clan says, pulling out an enormous hunting knife.
    "Stand down!" Kyle turns once again to the new-found foe. "My enthusiastic friend here has a point, you know. What are you planning to do? You are protecting a large group of unarmed ice cream vendors, and going up against literally a whole army. Now you may have been hardcore once, but that was years ago. I doubt you are still as fit as you were back then, and even if you still are we are no softies either. Back at home I wrestle grizzly bears with my bare hands. There are few of my tribe who hasn't done the same at one time or the other, except maybe for the Acadien clan."
    "Oui, it's true. We do not do 'ze bear wrestling."
    "Shut up Pierre. Anyway, if you fight us, you will not walk away from here. I have another proposal for you. We seek milder climates, and you rule a land of sandy beaches and movie stars. Join forces with us! We could stand together. Your lands are currently exposed to attack. Your people have gone weak. But with us, you stand a chance. Think about it."
    Kyle lights a cigarette and adjusts his ceremonial flannel shirt, before continuing: "Should you decline however..." He makes a suggestive gesture with his moose rifle.

  9. - Top - End - #9
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    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Planetary School Factions(Comedy) IC Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Charl View Post
    Kyle sighs and raises his hand, telling his tribesmen to hold off on the assault.
    "And what do you want? Why would someone in your position be running around playing ice cream truck?"
    "Let's bash this idiot, ey." Johnny of the Harper clan says, pulling out an enormous hunting knife.
    "Stand down!" Kyle turns once again to the new-found foe. "My enthusiastic friend here has a point, you know. What are you planning to do? You are protecting a large group of unarmed ice cream vendors, and going up against literally a whole army. Now you may have been hardcore once, but that was years ago. I doubt you are still as fit as you were back then, and even if you still are we are no softies either. Back at home I wrestle grizzly bears with my bare hands. There are few of my tribe who hasn't done the same at one time or the other, except maybe for the Acadien clan."
    "Oui, it's true. We do not do 'ze bear wrestling."
    "Shut up Pierre. Anyway, if you fight us, you will not walk away from here. I have another proposal for you. We seek milder climates, and you rule a land of sandy beaches and movie stars. Join forces with us! We could stand together. Your lands are currently exposed to attack. Your people have gone weak. But with us, you stand a chance. Think about it."
    Kyle lights a cigarette and adjusts his ceremonial flannel shirt, before continuing: "Should you decline however..." He makes a suggestive gesture with his moose rifle.
    "I still follow the Old Order of Acadamia." He says. "Please, however, borrow some gas." Why your still botherinig with something a hundred years out of date, he wonders.... I don't know.

  10. - Top - End - #10
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    charl's Avatar

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    Default Re: Planetary School Factions(Comedy) IC Thread

    "The old order is no more. In case you haven't noticed there's a civil war going on. If you want your province to be subjected to the horrors of war at a later date, then fine, my tribe will leave here peacefully. But know that some day someone will see your riches and strike, and that day you will wish you had our help. Last chance, herr movie star."

  11. - Top - End - #11
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    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Planetary School Factions(Comedy) IC Thread

    Quote Originally Posted by Charl View Post
    "The old order is no more. In case you haven't noticed there's a civil war going on. If you want your province to be subjected to the horrors of war at a later date, then fine, my tribe will leave here peacefully. But know that some day someone will see your riches and strike, and that day you will wish you had our help. Last chance, herr movie star."
    "Alright..... I can lend you my ice cream truck drivers... Most of the other factions are bound to get hungry for sweets some time in the future. The borders are heavily gaurded, and they can't get in without an offer for trade. You should probably consider helping to spread the ICCF(Ice Cream Corporation Foundation) throughout your enemie's territory."
    Last edited by ArlEammon; 2008-10-17 at 12:43 PM.

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