Haley's Secret From #309 (Speculation)

[Degausser]

I'm sorry to break it to you, but:

Haley is quite defanatly humanoid. She takes damage from lightning (seen here,) and can be cured by 'cure' spells as well as potions, all of which require her to be alive, and humanoid. She could, indeed, be non-human, though evidence of this is lacking.

I'm more inclined to believe the secret is something of a social nature. Such as "The truth is, I'm not exactly a what you'd call a nice girl." or ". . . what you'd call good-aligned" or " . . . what' you'd call honerable." Something along the lines of something that defines her personalaty, not her biology. That's just my pet theory though.

[Ikialev]

...not exactly what you'd call a girl.

She's just another transvetite.

[brilliantlight]

...not exactly what you'd call a girl.

She's just another transvetite.

I think Elan would have noticed that after they got together, he did sleep with her after all and he seems to be straight.

[Lissou]

I think Elan would have noticed that after they got together, he did sleep with her after all and he seems to be straight.

(No matter what you hear about what happened in schoolcamp)

[DreadSpoon]

3. My hypothesis is that Haley-Reanimated still possesses Haley's psyche.

Golems just don't work that way in D&D. They are not intelligent. They don't have personality. They're given very simple instructions with only the most basic and fundamental of reasoning capabilities. (e.g. "if it moves, and it's not Master, hit it") There's no actual rule against it, but it's just not the way they're presented at all.

http://www.d20srd.org/srd/typessubtypes.htm

As already pointed out, Haley has also shown numerous times that she does not have the Construct traits. She's been stunned (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0200.html), she's gotten cuts and healed them, she's been knocked unconscious, etc.

[Ikialev]

and he seems to be straight.

...yeah, and you will probably say for that that Elan slept with bandit no-leaderess. Huh.
But, this is a webcomic.
And as someone clever said, there are no girls on (the?) internet.

[Felixaar]

Y'kno, I'm not sure if this is pro or anti but here Haleys self hate or whatever says 'Uh, you're still alive?' and she says 'I'm not sure I'd call this living'.

The mystery deepens.

I gotta say I dont really agree with the theory though.

[Morty]

Y'kno, I'm not sure if this is pro or anti but here Haleys self hate or whatever says 'Uh, you're still alive?' and she says 'I'm not sure I'd call this living'.

The mystery deepens.

Except it's a psychological issue in this case. Haley doesn't mean living in the biological sense, but rather that her lack of trust prevents her from truly enjoying life.
I'm still sticking to "...a good person" theory, because I prefer simple answers. I'm just weird that way.

[Jade_Tarem]

Golems just don't work that way in D&D. They are not intelligent. They don't have personality. They're given very simple instructions with only the most basic and fundamental of reasoning capabilities. (e.g. "if it moves, and it's not Master, hit it") There's no actual rule against it, but it's just not the way they're presented at all.

There's a fairly simple process for "awakening" a construct, which then develops it's own personality and has mental functions that theoretically can be as good as a human's. I don't think Haley is a construct, though, because...

As already pointed out, Haley has also shown numerous times that she does not have the Construct traits. She's been stunned (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0200.html), she's gotten cuts and healed them, she's been knocked unconscious, etc.

...of this. While she could somehow be stunned, cut and leaking, and disabled as a wierd kind of living construct, constructs are destroyed when they go below 0 hit points. Living constructs enter a disabled state from -1 to -9 hp, but when that happens they freeze up instead of passing out, and Haley has passed out from hp damage before. And the knocked unconscious thing is true too.

[katkin]

' I'm not exactly country... I'm a little bit rock n roll' ?

Could work... Even though those aren't the words to a half remembered song. And I have no bullet points to back myself up with. Lets face it, I'm a bit too Phil Rodriguez to come up with a decent argument here...

[MReav]

She's no standard golem. Constructs are immune to Stunning, and Miko stunning kicked her to great effect in 200.

[David Argall]

And as someone clever said, there are no girls on (the?) internet.

The standard quote used to be "...where the men are men, and the women are men, and the little girls are vice cops."

[FoE]

I still go with "... not exactly human."

'Cause she's a shapeshifter. As in a doppelganger, or possibly a Changeling (if Rich will allow Eberron material) or some other variation.

Of course, now that I've posted my theory, I've destroyed any hope of it coming true. Right, Rich?

[ooknabah]

Here is a bump to a zombie thread: However, as I was reading strip 309 in my OOTS books today, it did make me wonder if this mystery had ever been solved. Funny to see this Golem theory after Crystal has gone that route.

Did we ever find an answer to this?