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    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Planetar

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    [Spell] "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    Inspiration (Warning, rather disgusting)

    Baneful Teleport
    Conjuration
    Level: Sor/Wiz 8
    Components: V, S, M
    Casting Time: Standard action
    Range: Touch
    Target: One touched creature
    Duration: Instantaneous
    Saving Throw: Will negates, Fortitude Partial (see text)
    Spell Resistance: Yes

    This spell instantly transports a being touched to a designated destination, which may be as distant as one mile per caster level. Interplanar travel is not possible. Any objects carried by the target are teleported with them, as long as their weight doesn't exceed their maximum load.

    You must be familiar with the destination: it can be a place you know well, either because you can currently see it, you've been there often, or you have used other means (such as scrying) to study the place for at least one hour.

    The target makes an initial Will save to resist the teleport entirely.

    As opposed to a normal teleport, Baneful Teleport takes the teleported creature through extradimensional spaces, miniscule passages and scathing vacuums, spitting them out on the other side horribly mangled. They take 1d8 damage per two caster levels and are sickened. On a successful Fortitude save, the damage is cut in half and the target is not sickened. If the damage from this spell exceeds their remaining hit points, they come out on the other side an unrecognizable horrific random mangled mess of organs, flesh and bone.

    Material Component: A bit of pig or lizard organ.


    [hr]
    I totally didn't know until today that the spell Teleport Other disappeared sometime between 1st and 3rd edition. This makes for a fun alternative.

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    Troll in the Playground
     
    Lyndworm's Avatar

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    Default Re: "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    Galaxy Quest is underrated. Nice work.

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    Ogre in the Playground
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    Default Re: "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    That's.......................mean.

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    Orc in the Playground
     
    mr.fizzypop's Avatar

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    Default Re: "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    That's.......................AWESOME!
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    Orc in the Playground
     
    Hectonkhyres's Avatar

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    Default Re: "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    And it would be an even more awesome spell to houserule fumble.

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    Hoopy Frood in the Playground Moderator
     
    Vaynor's Avatar

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    Default Re: "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    Nice. Galaxy Quest rocks.
    “Sometimes, immersed in his books, there would come to him
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    and the serenity for which he labored was shattered as he realized the
    little time he had in life to read so much, to learn what he had to know.”
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    Ogre in the Playground
     
    HalflingRogueGirl

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    Default Re: "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    Nice, I really need to watch that again at some point. Nice job.
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    Spamalot in the Playground
     
    DigoDragon's Avatar

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    Default Re: "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    I wonder what already sickened and horribbly mangled looking abberations would come out looking like with this spell?

    *pop*
    Fighter: "Hey, a school of guppies."
    Wizard: "But I Baneful Teleported an Aboleth."
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    Ogre in the Playground
     
    EvilDMMk3's Avatar

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    Default Re: "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    Nice spell. On a side note, my favourite part of the clip?
    Spoiler
    Show
    I see you managed to get your shirt off.
    It is a contraction of Evil DM Mark 3. I don't know why why so many have difficulty with a standard contraction but there we are.
    In the beginning there was nothing, which exploded
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    Bugbear in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    What happens if you use the spell on a guy with no last name?
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    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    thegurullamen's Avatar

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    Default Re: "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    Quote Originally Posted by Waspinator View Post
    What happens if you use the spell on a guy with no last name?
    The polarity reverses and what was once inside the red-shirt's no-last-name's body is now on the outside. Hilarity ensues. (No, seriously, it does. Watch the movie if you don't believe me. Tony Shaloub is hilarious.)
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    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Leicontis's Avatar

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    Default Re: "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    There's actually a psionic power that's like a lower-level version of this called Dimension Twister. It's in Complete Psionic, and functions like Close-range Dimension Door, except that you teleport somebody else (Will negates) and they take something like 3d6 or 5d6 damage without augmentation. My GM houseruled I couldn't teleport them to max range straight up :(
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    Titan in the Playground
     
    chiasaur11's Avatar

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    Default Re: "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    Quote Originally Posted by thegurullamen View Post
    The polarity reverses and what was once inside the red-shirt's no-last-name's body is now on the outside. Hilarity ensues. (No, seriously, it does. Watch the movie if you don't believe me. Tony Shaloub is hilarious.)

    So's the whole film.

    It was the reason my parents bought a DVD player. (Well, the Thermian audio track was.)
    Last edited by chiasaur11; 2008-09-24 at 03:34 PM.
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    Ettin in the Playground
     
    Planetar

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    Default Re: "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    Thanks for all the feedback. Seems like a fun option.

    Fine by me that there is already a different version, as it's psionic and lower level. This is my second Galaxy Quest reference homebrew, the first being the Fatu-Krey. Just posted a third as well, another spell, Thirteen Seconds.

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    Orc in the Playground
     
    Carrion_Humanoid's Avatar

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    Default Re: [Spell] "But the animal is inside out. And it exploded."

    They are all awesome, I only wish I hadn't made my Campaign world very Evolution Based.

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