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    Orc in the Playground
     
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    Default [Pirate] Martin Wennekamp - Cursed to be landbound

    (This is my first ever attempt at a contest, let me know if I do something wrong!)

    The monkeys of the isle chattered in the trees. Gulls flew overhead, and crabs scuttled along the beach. All seemed perfectly free of man's intervention.

    Suddenly, a stream of half raved, half blubbered profanity split the air like stroke of lightning. It continued, growing louder, as a bedraggled figure crawled onto the beach. Exhausted, the figure paused. He looked at the beach, and let out a howl of anguish. Then he began to speak... after a fashion...

    "Arrrgh, bleavin, graveled, wretched... Farrggh, rotted glaved... NOT AGAIN! For the last time, I'll leave this all-Gods-forsaken spit o' land, if I have to live a hundred more years, and a hundred more after that!"

    The man slumped onto the ground, his yells subsiding into wet sobs. A rat swam up on the beach beside him, and chirped saucily at him. He cuffed it, and it scampered off. Whimpering, he rolled over into the fetal position, fingering a strange amulet that hung around his neck...
    Patchouli Knowledge avatar courtesy of the skillful Prime32.

    "Everyone feels benevolent if nothing happens to be annoying him at the moment."
    --C. S. Lewis

    "The first person to prove that cow's milk is drinkable was very, very thirsty."

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Cursed to be landbound...

    Martin Wennekamp
    Neutral Good male human (Medium humanoid)
    Ranger 6th / Rogue 5th
    60 hp, Init +0
    Speed 30 ft
    Armor Class 10 (touch and flatfooted also 10)
    Base Attack/Grapple: +11/+11
    Attack: Fisticuffs +11 melee (1d3+3)
    Full Attack: Fisticuffs +11/+6 melee (1d3+3)
    Sneak Attack Bonus: +3d6
    Saves: Fort +7, Ref +9, Will +1
    Abilities: Str 15, Dex 11, Con 13, Int 11, Wis 7, Cha 17
    Skills: Balance 3, Bluff 12, Climb 5, Concentration 1, Diplomacy 36 (includes a +10 bonus from his amulet), Disguise 3, Gather Information 3, Handle Animal 20, Heal -2, Intimidate 5, Jump 2, Listen 5, Move Silently 3, Perform (Sailor-Cursing) 8, Ride 2, Search 12, Sense Motive 10, Spot 8, Survival 8, Swim 29 (includes a +10 bonus from his amulet)
    Feats: Endurance, Negotiator, Improved Unarmed Strike, Improved Grapple, Run, Skill Focus (Diplomacy, Handle Animal, Swim)
    Favored Enemies Animal +4, Vermin +2

    Animal Companion: Martin's animal companion is a dire rat, named Scrapple.

    Wild Empathy: Martin can improve the attitude of an animal like a diplomacy check, by rolling (1d20+9).

    Evasion: If Martin makes a successful Reflex saving throw against an attack that normally deals half damage on a successful save, he instead takes no damage.

    Trap Sense: Martin gains a +1 bonus on Reflex saves made to avoid traps and a +1 dodge bonus to AC against attacks made by traps.
    Patchouli Knowledge avatar courtesy of the skillful Prime32.

    "Everyone feels benevolent if nothing happens to be annoying him at the moment."
    --C. S. Lewis

    "The first person to prove that cow's milk is drinkable was very, very thirsty."

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Cursed to be landbound...

    Martin Wennekamp is a grizzled old fellow. He made his living as a fast talker and a faster runner for much of his youth, until he tried to barter passage to a distant continent with a myterious stranger. Once he was aboard the man's ship, he found himself pressganged into a pirate crew, and forced to fight wave upon wave of kobolds in an obscure set of islands.

    After one battle with these savages, he found a chest full of loot, including a mysterious amulet. He found that as long as he wore it, people laughed louder at his wisecracks, listened more raptly to his stories, and believed even the most ridiculous of his fibs.

    A bit later, the pirate captain decided to sail back to the mainland, carrying a hold full of strange and unique treasures. They set sail in high spirits, and Martin wore his amulet proudly as the spoils of a grand adventure.

    However, a short while after they set sail, a fire sprang up on deck. The men raced to contain it, but it flared up into a raging blast within minutes, ate through the sails, and reduced most of the ship to charcoal. The ship began to sink, hissing, into the water, and the survivors began to jump ship. Of them all, though, only two souls made it back to the relative safety of land- Martin, and a smug-looking rat.

    However, other captains discovered the islands, and before long many adventurers descended on the island, destroying the kobold population and rendering the islands a safe spot for the wealthy to relax in the tropical climes. Martin quickly managed to convince a captain to take him back to the mainlands.

    That ship, too, was consumed in a mysterious fire.

    Martin has tried many times to board a ship en route to civilization. Each time, the ship goes down with all hands, and only Martin and the rat (now quite tame, and Martin's "pet") escape. Whether Martin is stubborn, or just stupid, remains to be seen, but if a ship happens to meet him, you can be sure that he'll try once more to escape the island...

    As for his trademark phrase, it would have to be the oath he swears each time he finds himself back on the island, "I'll leave this spit o' land, if I have to live a hundred more years, and a hundred more after that!"
    Patchouli Knowledge avatar courtesy of the skillful Prime32.

    "Everyone feels benevolent if nothing happens to be annoying him at the moment."
    --C. S. Lewis

    "The first person to prove that cow's milk is drinkable was very, very thirsty."

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Cursed to be landbound...

    AMULET OF KYUKYARK

    Martin Wennekamp's amulet is in fact an Artifact, the Amulet of Kyukyark. All those who know its true function are now dead, most of them at the hands of Martin and his original shipmates. The amulet was part of a clever and successful ruse that made the kobolds of that particular isle extremely rich.

    The amulet grants a whopping +10 bonus to Diplomacy and Swim checks. However, if at any time the amulet is moved more than 500 feet from the shore of the island where it was made, it creates a magical fire on the nearest wooden object. This fire spreads very quickly, but will not harm the wearer of the amulet.

    The kobolds of the island often pretended that they wanted to establish trading relations with kobolds of nearby islands. They would ask the other kobolds to bring over a significant amount of valuables, then send someone back with something very valuable, and the amulet. The ship would burst into flame, the kobold with the amulet would swim back with the valuable object, and the cycle would begin again.

    Martin knows none of this. All he knows is that the amulet seems to make it easier to convince people to do what he wants. He knows nothing of its effects when taken from its home, or its enhancement of his swimming- he simply believes that the fires are a coincidence, and that his swimming prowess alone has saved him from shipwreck after shipwreck.

    Strong evocation and enchantment; CL 20th.
    Patchouli Knowledge avatar courtesy of the skillful Prime32.

    "Everyone feels benevolent if nothing happens to be annoying him at the moment."
    --C. S. Lewis

    "The first person to prove that cow's milk is drinkable was very, very thirsty."

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Cursed to be landbound...

    Martin's island is located a few thousand feet from other islands. Reefs and rocks about 750 feet from shore make it impossible to swim to other islands, although a boat can make the journey with a skillful helmsman.

    On the island are about 50,000 gold pieces, a number of jars of exceptional potato wine, a handful of large jade stones worth about 2000 gp altogether, a crab shell studded with emeralds worth about 3000 gp, and a number of tribal cloths of aesthetic value only. Martin has discovered all of these, and protects them vigilantly.
    Patchouli Knowledge avatar courtesy of the skillful Prime32.

    "Everyone feels benevolent if nothing happens to be annoying him at the moment."
    --C. S. Lewis

    "The first person to prove that cow's milk is drinkable was very, very thirsty."

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Cursed to be landbound...

    Scrapple

    Dire Rat

    Small Animal
    20hp, Initiative +4
    Speed 40 ft climb 20 ft swim 20 ft
    AC 18 (+1 size, +4 dex, +3 natural)
    BA/G: +1/-3
    Attack: Bite +7 melee
    Full Attack: Bite +7 melee
    Space/Reach: 5 ft/ 5 ft
    Special Qualities: Low-light vision, scent
    Saves: Fort +4, Ref +7, Will +4
    Abilities: Str 10, Dex 17, Con 12, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 4
    Skills: Climb +11, Hide +8, Listen +4, Move Silently +4, Spot +5, Swim +12
    Feats: Alertness, Weapon Finesse, Evasion
    Tricks known: Attack, Come, Fetch, Heel, Seek, Track

    Scrapple has a +4 racial bonus on Hide and Move Silently checks, and a +8 racial bonus on Balance, Climb, and Swim checks. He can always choose to take 10 on Climb checks, even if rushed or threatened. He uses his Dexterity modifier instead of his Strength modifier for Climb and Swim checks. He has a +8 racial bonus on any Swim check to perform some special action or avoid a hazard. He can always choose to take 10 on a Swim check, even if distracted or endangered. He can use the run action while swimming, provided he swims in a straight line.

    Scrapple is an exceptional ship's rat. Martin has been able to train him to help find food, tracking down and killing wild rats, crabs, and even the fish that surround the island. Martin named Scrapple (in one of his less lucid moments) after his favorite food, a kind of stew that his mother used to make. Scrapple now only responds to that name, despite Martin's efforts to rename him. While Martin's escape from several shipwrecks may be explained by his amulet, Scrapple is just a naturally talented (and lucky) swimmer.
    Patchouli Knowledge avatar courtesy of the skillful Prime32.

    "Everyone feels benevolent if nothing happens to be annoying him at the moment."
    --C. S. Lewis

    "The first person to prove that cow's milk is drinkable was very, very thirsty."

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Cursed to be landbound...

    Great, mere minutes after I finish posting my idea you come along and post this. :P
    Srsly tho, this is quite the upset. Not only are we using the same basic idea, we're both first-time entrants! Hopefully I won't have a hard time making mine different (not to knock your pirate, of course).
    Edit: Although I hope you don't mind that I made a curse for my pirate too. It's really not that similar to yours, but I thought I might give you a heads-up.
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    Guycott's a polygot who flew aeroflot to farm his plot and pray a lot for sunlight(hot!) to warm his cot and avoid getting shot by a man with a smoking pot and a pen that won't blot and a dog named spot.

    -M. Nicolai

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Cursed to be landbound...

    Oh sorry, didn't see yours... oh well, we can both have a shipwrecked pirate, right? Anyway, good luck to you...
    Patchouli Knowledge avatar courtesy of the skillful Prime32.

    "Everyone feels benevolent if nothing happens to be annoying him at the moment."
    --C. S. Lewis

    "The first person to prove that cow's milk is drinkable was very, very thirsty."

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Cursed to be landbound...

    Finished getting everything up, I think, so please let me know what you think!
    Patchouli Knowledge avatar courtesy of the skillful Prime32.

    "Everyone feels benevolent if nothing happens to be annoying him at the moment."
    --C. S. Lewis

    "The first person to prove that cow's milk is drinkable was very, very thirsty."

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Martin Wennekamp - Cursed to be landb

    Wow.

    I like this.

    I like this a LOT.

    As the captain of a pirate crew, and the leader of an organization known as the Local Order of Pirates, I can say, without a doubt, that that is some high-quality sailor-cursin' wennekamp's been doin'.

    Very impressive.


    Oh, and everything else is good, too. ;)
    Project CUTE:&&http://www.giantitp.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl?board=homebrew;action=display;num=11543005 05

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Martin Wennekamp - Cursed to be landb

    Thanks!

    Maybe I should adjust his skill points to give him some ranks in Perform (Sailor-Cursing). ;)
    Patchouli Knowledge avatar courtesy of the skillful Prime32.

    "Everyone feels benevolent if nothing happens to be annoying him at the moment."
    --C. S. Lewis

    "The first person to prove that cow's milk is drinkable was very, very thirsty."

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    Dwarf in the Playground
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    Default Re: [Pirate] Martin Wennekamp - Cursed to be landb

    I must say-
    that would be very great.

    Also, how do you vote on these things?
    Project CUTE:&&http://www.giantitp.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl?board=homebrew;action=display;num=11543005 05

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Martin Wennekamp - Cursed to be landb

    Quote Originally Posted by The High Priest of Banjo
    I must say-
    that would be very great.

    Also, how do you vote on these things?
    Voting won't take place until October.

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    Dwarf in the Playground
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    Default Re: [Pirate] Martin Wennekamp - Cursed to be landb

    Well...that's FOREVER away...

    Thanks.
    Project CUTE:&&http://www.giantitp.com/cgi-bin/yabb/YaBB.pl?board=homebrew;action=display;num=11543005 05

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Martin Wennekamp - Cursed to be landb

    *grins*

    Great idea, and though you may not have meant it, the whole thing cracks me up, especially the steenkin' rat.

    That ring is definetely a nasty piece of work.

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Martin Wennekamp - Cursed to be landb

    Quote Originally Posted by The Vorpal Tribble
    *grins*

    Great idea, and though you may not have meant it, the whole thing cracks me up, especially the steenkin' rat.

    That ring is definetely a nasty piece of work.
    Thanks muchly!

    I kind of wrote it tongue in cheek, so I'm glad you enjoyed it. It was a blast to make!

    By the way, should I add more detail for the island, to make up for the lack of a ship? I was thinking of doing a map or something.
    Patchouli Knowledge avatar courtesy of the skillful Prime32.

    "Everyone feels benevolent if nothing happens to be annoying him at the moment."
    --C. S. Lewis

    "The first person to prove that cow's milk is drinkable was very, very thirsty."

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    Default Re: [Pirate] Martin Wennekamp - Cursed to be landb

    Quote Originally Posted by Rolaran

    By the way, should I add more detail for the island, to make up for the lack of a ship? I was thinking of doing a map or something.
    Definetely wouldn't hurt.

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