Erfworld Thread XI: Finally, it's HAMMER-TIME!

[TheWombatOfDoom]

Erfworld is an online comic about a table top gamer named Parson Gotti that is summoned from our world to the world of Erf, a world based on its own rules that function similarly to a table top game. This makes Parson, very experienced in gaming, becomes a valuable player in a game that may very well threaten his life. Does he want to go back to his own world at all, or is this world the perfect place for a gamer such as himself? Is he really dreaming? Will he be there forever? Who knows! What we DO know is that in this world, the pieces are living things, and the stakes cannot be higher. Join Parson on this wild ride filled with real world (or to the Erfworlders - Stupid World) references and puns, gaming homages and glory, fate and chance.

Previous incarnations:
GitP: Erfworld Forum section (Locked)
Erfworld Thread I
Erfworld Thread II: Finally thinking with portals, over a year later
Erfworld Thread III: As the Erf Turns
Erfworld Thread IV: In Memory of King Saline
Erfworld Thread V: Baddie Will Not Post In Thread
Erfworld Thread VI: +10 vs Fat Guys From Ohio
Erfworld Thread VII: No Consensus, Left Unsealed
Erfworld Thread VIII: VIIInnie, VIIIdi, VIIIci
Erfworld Thread IX: By the Flower and Gray Skull
Erfworld Thread X: A Series of Unfortunate Cliffhangers

Currently we are on page 332 of Book 3(ish).

Also, please SPOILER your comments for the first three posts about an update that has occurred.

[Rockphed]

I suspect that Charlie can't actually read German, and thus is pulling the terms he used in this update out of hastily viewed war movies. Like all things taken from stupid world into Erfworld, it gains a level of stupidity for every unit it touches.

[keybounce]

It looks like they have made it safely to Charlescomm.

So, ... Wanda?

[Rockphed]

It looks like they have made it safely to Charlescomm.

So, ... Wanda?

That is a flashback to when they were briefed on all this stuff with the guns.

[Welf]

It looks like they have made it safely to Charlescomm.

So, ... Wanda?

There is a small new image at top, then the German How-To and below the flashback to Charlescomm. I missed the image at the top at first.
I guess technically it's an update.

[deuterio12]

Hammer time cannot be stopped.

Speaking of hammers looks like those dirtmancers could use one right now.

Now we just need Stanley to come crashing out of wall all "Oh yeah!".

[Calemyr]

That is a flashback to when they were briefed on all this stuff with the guns.

There is a small new image at top, then the German How-To and below the flashback to Charlescomm. I missed the image at the top at first.
I guess technically it's an update.

Yeah, the Dirtamancer wants to set up a trap like the one they saw once in Charlescomm.

[JavaScribe]

New comic.

[Otomodachi]

New comic.

Spoiler: FFS Rob

Show

Out of nine panels, five of them are devoted to erasing the momentum of the previous (save MOST recent) few strips, i.e. using a contract to gain footing against Charlie. After what, three comics dealing with setting up that idea, we get five panels to invalidate the entire premise and also to remind us that all the money is gone. You know, in case you forgot in the last 15-20 pages (i.e. several months).

[deuterio12]

Spoiler

Show

This turn is still far from over.

At least one dirtmancer bites the dust. How did he ever live so long while being such an idiot as going alone into a straight tunnel when he knows the enemy has a ranged weapon? Well at least he paid for his idiocy.

Plus all those dirtmancers and not a single golem to use as cover between them. Considering how much ammo they had to spend to punch through the wall, a hard rock or heavy metal golem would've done wonders. So the dirtmancers are all already croaked. Convenient that Wanda doesn't have her pliers to get her own decrypted army though.

[Rockphed]

Spoiler

Show

This turn is still far from over.

At least one dirtmancer bites the dust. How did he ever live so long while being such an idiot as going alone into a straight tunnel when he knows the enemy has a ranged weapon? Well at least he paid for his idiocy.

Plus all those dirtmancers and not a single golem to use as cover between them. Considering how much ammo they had to spend to punch through the wall, a hard rock or heavy metal golem would've done wonders. So the dirtmancers are all already croaked. Convenient that Wanda doesn't have her pliers to get her own decrypted army though.

I suspect that golems cost upkeep (albeit probably small), and the magic kingdom tends to be money poor. So while dirtamancers probably get hired occasionally to make golems, they probably don't keep any around for their use. Which is too bad, since a golem here would be great.

[DataNinja]

I suspect that golems cost upkeep (albeit probably small), and the magic kingdom tends to be money poor. So while dirtamancers probably get hired occasionally to make golems, they probably don't keep any around for their use. Which is too bad, since a golem here would be great.

I seem to recall it mentioned, though don't quote me, that golems and such could be made in the magic kingdom for jobs, but couldn't really be kept there, since they're potential peace-disturbers.

[deuterio12]

I seem to recall it mentioned, though don't quote me, that golems and such could be made in the magic kingdom for jobs, but couldn't really be kept there, since they're potential peace-disturbers.

But the dirtmancers grabbing all the guns and waltzing around with them everywhere was not peace-disturbing at all?

[Rockphed]

But the dirtmancers grabbing all the guns and waltzing around with them everywhere was not peace-disturbing at all?

It is amazing the level of mental gymnastics people will perform to maintain the status quo.

[JavaScribe]

But the dirtmancers grabbing all the guns and waltzing around with them everywhere was not peace-disturbing at all?

To be fair, Parson is pretty ruthless even without that sword and has already shown that he has no qualms about invading the MK. Combine that with a Croakamancer that can kill and raise everyone as her brainwashed minions, and the MK has pretty good reason to feel nervous.

Just look at what Marie is already planning.

[deuterio12]

To be fair, Parson is pretty ruthless even without that sword and has already shown that he has no qualms about invading the MK. Combine that with a Croakamancer that can kill and raise everyone as her brainwashed minions, and the MK has pretty good reason to feel nervous.

Just look at what Marie is already planning.

All the more reason for the dirtmancers to keep some golems around just in case.

In particular because this is the rich celebrity dirtmancers we're talking about, so they should be able to afford some extra upkeep with no big trouble.

It would also fit thematically since big rock stars are expected to have big burly bodyguards.

[Rockphed]

New Comic! It is even sticking with the (somewhat) interesting discussion between Sky, queen for a day, and Benjamin Franchise, chief caster and moneymancer.

Spoiler: Predictions

Show

I predict that Ben will offer Sky, Vinnie, and some doombats to Gobwin Knob for breaking the Trust Fund agreement. He will then give Vanna and the rest of the doombats to Charlie. Since unled units auto-attack and Vinnie will be in a tight space with the bats, Charlie will get dinged for every bat that attacks Vinnie. I don't know how dangerous the bats are, but if they set it up right, they could easily get 50 million out of Charlie, enough to cover Charlie's attempt to steal both treasuries. If they go whole hog and have more than 10 unled bats try to attack, they could do significantly better. I think Vinnie has upwards of 200 bats, so they could get 500 million out of Charlie. Of course, then they would have to wipe Charlie off the map before he figured out how to destroy Transylvito, which would be hard.

Edit: And another one! Well, a text update. A somewhat boring text update. Maybe the next one will show more of Sky in action poses.

[HandofShadows]

New Comic.

Spoiler

Show

Rocks fall, everyone dies?

[keybounce]

Spoiler

Show

"What can 5 dirtmancers do to us?"
...
"Yup, lets run"
Crush
"If you're going to be right, you need to learn how to be quick about it" :-)

https://www.schlockmercenary.com/2014-12-07

[DigoDragon]

New Comic! It is even sticking with the (somewhat) interesting discussion between Sky, queen for a day, and Benjamin Franchise, chief caster and moneymancer.

Spoiler: Predictions

Show

I predict that Ben will offer Sky, Vinnie, and some doombats to Gobwin Knob for breaking the Trust Fund agreement. He will then give Vanna and the rest of the doombats to Charlie. Since unled units auto-attack and Vinnie will be in a tight space with the bats, Charlie will get dinged for every bat that attacks Vinnie. I don't know how dangerous the bats are, but if they set it up right, they could easily get 50 million out of Charlie, enough to cover Charlie's attempt to steal both treasuries. If they go whole hog and have more than 10 unled bats try to attack, they could do significantly better. I think Vinnie has upwards of 200 bats, so they could get 500 million out of Charlie. Of course, then they would have to wipe Charlie off the map before he figured out how to destroy Transylvito, which would be hard.

Spoiler: Update

Show

Oh, that plan would be pretty amusing. And I'd certainly have all the respect for Ben in pulling off something smartly like that.

[deuterio12]

"Don't worry guyz Charlie planned for everything! EVERYTHING!"
"What if they just drop rocks on us?"
"... FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-"

[JavaScribe]

New comic.

[Welf]

There have been quite a lot of updates recently.

Spoiler

Show

Is it just me or was this a massive change in the Erfworld mechanics and story telling? So far "Fate" has been unavoidable, and what was predicted had to come true. Now it can be postponed, and it's more fuzzy. I understand that this makes the writing much easier, and might reintroduce some tension, but it is still a massive change.

(Btw, good news on the personal front according to an Facebook post)

[Rockphed]

There have been quite a lot of updates recently.

Spoiler

Show

Is it just me or was this a massive change in the Erfworld mechanics and story telling? So far "Fate" has been unavoidable, and what was predicted had to come true. Now it can be postponed, and it's more fuzzy. I understand that this makes the writing much easier, and might reintroduce some tension, but it is still a massive change.

(Btw, good news on the personal front according to an Facebook post)

No, predictamancy has always been "a prediction will come true eventually...somehow". So in the Dig-dug story, they tried to get around the prediction by hiring Charlie to attack them. And in volume 0 there are various predictions about Wanda and Jillian (and that Jillian will kill the overlord of whatever side). Getting things to happen the way you want them to is typically "the very hard way". Going along with fate, however, is the easy way. There is also an element of Greek tragedy prophesies involved (where the course that tries to avoid a prediction inevitably brings it about).

[JavaScribe]

It's been implied for a while that Erfworld itself is basically alive and Fate works like a railroading GM. Hence why Wanda has said that you can kill a fated unit, it just results in something worse taking its place.

[deuterio12]

Wanda herself spent the whole of book 1 trying to fulfill the fate of getting her own arkentool.

And then she reveals she had already been trying pretty long. Wanda was the one that lured Stanley to FAQ because she thought Stanley was an incompetent and would easily die and drop the arkenhammer for her to pick up. We all know how that one ended.

[Lizard Lord]

Yea....Wanda's post Olive Branch story does give the impression that trying to make Fate happen is just as bad as trying to fight it.

[tomaO2]

It's been implied for a while that Erfworld itself is basically alive and Fate works like a railroading GM. Hence why Wanda has said that you can kill a fated unit, it just results in something worse taking its place.

I'm personally more than ready to find out what this "worse" fate would be. It's gotta be more interesting, for me as a reader, than more Wanda. It would probably be good for GK anyway, since the story seems to be pushing for Wanda to switch sides before we have even taken down the main antagonist of the story. Can we just set aside the sudden but inevitable betrayal (and become the new main enemy) until Charlie is dead? Can you just try not to screw things up for the side that you supposedly serve, Wanda? Just for a change of pace?

As of right now though, it's just plain impossible for me to feel any actual tension at all. Am I supposed to suddenly be worried because we are told that fated units can die? Yea, sure, it's theoretically possible, but there is literally nothing to suggest that it's ever happened. Even when talking to carnies, who are all about beating fate, we have heard not a single story of them actually succeeding, and, at best, they can try and fulfil fate in ways that are not overly harmful to themselves.

So far, the only way out is to stop playing the game (teleport back to their homeworlds).

[deuterio12]

So far, the only way out is to stop playing the game (teleport back to their homeworlds).[/FONT]

Not really since going by Jed the spell to take Hamster back home would've killed him as a secondary effect.

For all we know the previous perfect warlord may've died too in the way back to stupidworld. And even if she did survive she would've still been heavily addicted to heroine.

Seems like Fate is more of the jerkish DM that will screw over the players no matter what they do. Like Wanda was fated to get the arkenpliers, but fate kept going "oops, Jillian rolls a natural 20 against your charm effect and screws up your whole strategy" then "So you managed to take the arkenpliers from Ansom's hands and ntry to to pick them up? Lolnope suddenly a dozen archons shooting lazors at you!"

[Razade]

Considering that the real Garland died of a drug overdose, I think that was what Rob was going for.