First time DMing and already killed a character.

[Ravens_cry]

Originally Posted by Random NPC

Your theory is flawed.

ALL cats are Chaotic, so in theory, only 3 cats exist.

Glory be to Snuggles, Bringer of the Hurtsies!

I would say Siamese and similar temperament cats are the closest Cat Kind has to Lawful, no matter what Lady and the Tramp may say. That movie is an abomination unto Cat!
Here is another icon for the faithful, inspired by Good Cat.

[Random NPC]

Originally Posted by Ravens_cry

I would say Siamese and similar temperament cats are the closest Cat Kind has to Lawful, no matter what Lady and the Tramp may say. That movie is an abomination unto Cat!
Here is another icon for the faithful, inspired by Good Cat.

nah... they be Chaotic I-don't-give-a-flying-f-Neutral Cat

[mizzim]

Originally Posted by Ravens_cry

I would say Siamese and similar temperament cats are the closest Cat Kind has to Lawful, no matter what Lady and the Tramp may say. That movie is an abomination unto Cat!
Here is another icon for the faithful, inspired by Good Cat.

umm, one, that picture is obviously computer edited, and, two, there is no such thing as a "good chaotic" cat. there is only "neutral chatotic" and "evil chaotic" or whatever.

[Ravens_cry]

Originally Posted by mizzim

umm, one, that picture is obviously computer edited, and, two, there is no such thing as a "good chaotic" cat. there is only "neutral chatotic" and "evil chaotic" or whatever.

Of course its obviously computer edited. It is but an image, designed to convey but a small portion of the glory that is Good Cat. As far as Good cats are concerned, I beg to differ. They may seem aloof compared to the "Oh Human, I am Thy Faithful Servant" slavishness of dogs, but they can love you all the same.

[chiasaur11]

Originally Posted by mizzim

umm, one, that picture is obviously computer edited, and, two, there is no such thing as a "good chaotic" cat. there is only "neutral chatotic" and "evil chaotic" or whatever.

Yeah.

I can see, as a once in a generation oddity, a chaotic neutral cat. It's not likely, but it does make a certain kind of sense. I can even see lawful evil. But good? They're cats. It ain't gonna happen.

(For the purposes of this statement, only housecats count as cats)

[Shadow_Elf]

The Cat Pantheon:

Alignment	Name
Lawful Good	Cuddles
Neutral Good	Leoparddles
Chaotic Good	Bengal Tigger
Lawful Neutral	Lionddles
True Neutral	Wuggles
Chaotic Neutral	Couggles
Lawful Evil	Siberian Tigger
Neutral Evil	Pantheggles
Chaotic Evil	Snuggles

Hello, and Welcome to CatPrayer (TM)

[cnsvnc]

Originally Posted by Ravens_cry

As far as Good cats are concerned, I beg to differ. They may seem aloof compared to the "Oh Human, I am Thy Faithful Servant" slavishness of dogs, but they can love you all the same.

Aloof? You mean tyrannical. As far as the cat is concerned, YOU are the PET. It's your job to provide it with food, shelter and playthings indefinitely with no questions asked. They love you just as you love pizza.

And that's just for ordinary cats. Our dread lord's views on the matter defies mortal comprehension.


EDIT: And now a Cat Pantheon? Accept the truth people, save yourself the horror of shattered dreams and embrace the truth: There is one and only one true Cat God. And his wrath is legion.

BOW BEFORE THE TRUE CAT GOD, YOU PATHETIC PRIMATES! YOUR BODIES ARE NAUGHT BUT A DROP IN HIS MILK BOWL!! YOUR SOULS ARE AS YARN BEFORE THE MAJESTY OF DREAD LORD SNUGGLES!!!

CAAAAATNIP FOR THE CAAAAT GOOOOOOOOOOD!

[chiasaur11]

Originally Posted by cnsvnc

Aloof? You mean tyrannical. As far as the cat is concerned, YOU are the PET. It's your job to provide it with food, shelter and playthings indefinitely with no questions asked. They love you just as you love pizza.

And that's just for ordinary cats. Our dread lord's views on the matter defies mortal comprehension.


EDIT: And now a Cat Pantheon? Accept the truth people, save yourself the horror of shattered dreams and embrace the truth: There is one and only one true Cat God. And his wrath is legion.

BOW BEFORE THE TRUE CAT GOD, YOU PATHETIC PRIMATES! YOUR BODIES ARE NAUGHT BUT A DROP IN HIS MILK BOWL!! YOUR SOULS ARE AS YARN BEFORE THE MAJESTY OF DREAD LORD SNUGGLES!!!

CAAAAATNIP FOR THE CAAAAT GOOOOOOOOOOD!

You know, wouldn't the most morally good option here for a person who (unlike those who have tried to stat out Rex, the Wonder Dog) believes Snuggles is that powerful be to oppose him, even knowing you'll fail?

Although we can both agree there is no good cat. I mean, sure, maybe lions can be good, or maybe some tigers, but housecats?

[mizzim]

Originally Posted by chiasaur11

You know, wouldn't the most morally good option here for a person who (unlike those who have tried to stat out Rex, the Wonder Dog) believes Snuggles is that powerful be to oppose him, even knowing you'll fail?

Although we can both agree there is no good cat. I mean, sure, maybe lions can be good, or maybe some tigers, but housecats?

.....
.....

.....
Lions and Tigers and Bears, Oh My!

[only1doug]

Originally Posted by chiasaur11

You know, wouldn't the most morally good option here for a person who (unlike those who have tried to stat out Rex, the Wonder Dog) believes Snuggles is that powerful be to oppose him, even knowing you'll fail?

Although we can both agree there is no good cat. I mean, sure, maybe lions can be good, or maybe some tigers, but housecats?

Unfortunately Chiasaur there is no point in trying to oppose Snuggles, your best hope is that Snuggles will eat you first.

Originally Posted by Thane of Fife

I'm sure most of you have seen that fake Chick tract "Who Shall be Eaten First," or whatever it's called.

If someone could modify that to fit with the concepts created in this thread then, well,

Awesome

would result.

Hmm, I'll have a go at it. Apathy Strikes.

[Anonymous Man]

Originally Posted by Ravens_cry

"Snuggles Will Come, Padding On The Soft Footpads Of Doom. But She Who Is The Mother Cat To Us All, She Who Is Good Cat, Will Care For Us In That Hour, As A Mother Cares For Her Kittens. A Fierce And Wild Protector Of All Things She Be, Terrible As the Claws Of The She Lion,And As Strong As The Jaws Of The Mother Tiger."
All Hail To Good Cat, Snuggles, Cat, And All The Pantheon!
Yarn For the Yarn Throne, And Milk For Their Milk Bowl! Offerings Of Catnip In Thankfulness And Fellowship!

Indeed. Also...
CATNIP FOR THE CAT GODS! YARN FOR THE YARN THRONES! MILK FOR THE MILK BOWL! ALL HAIL THE CAT PANTHEON!

[chiasaur11]

Originally Posted by only1doug

Unfortunately Chiasaur there is no point in trying to oppose Snuggles, your best hope is that Snuggles will eat you first.

Hmm, I'll have a go at it. Apathy Strikes.

I understand the hopelessness here.

I'm just thinking of bringing back the old norse virtues in doomed defeat thing.

You know, the whole "We know we'll die in Ragnarok, but we die fighting" thing.

Besides, it seems those Snuggles hates most last longest, just so he can toy with them more.

[NPCMook]

How is this thread not locked? Its so massively derailed even the most lax of mods can see that!

[Ravens_cry]

Originally Posted by NPCMook

How is this thread not locked? Its so massively derailed even the most lax of mods can see that!

The Truth of Good Cat and Snuggles has opened their eyes to the glory that is Cat.
Either that, or Mods like silliness as much as we do.

[cnsvnc]

Originally Posted by NPCMook

How is this thread not locked? Its so massively derailed even the most lax of mods can see that!

This thread has been desecrated in the name of the dread lord Snuggles. It is worthy of being added into the Yarn Throne. It'd be criminal (not to mention blasphemous) to lock this thread.


As is the norm: YARN FOR THE YARN THRONE! MILK FOR THE MILK BOWL! CAAAATNIP FOR THE CAAAAAT GOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!

[Ravens_cry]

Originally Posted by cnsvnc

This thread has been desecrated in the name of the dread lord Snuggles. It is worthy of being added into the Yarn Throne. It'd be criminal (not to mention blasphemous) to lock this thread.


As is the norm: YARN FOR THE YARN THRONE! MILK FOR THE MILK BOWL! CAAAATNIP FOR THE CAAAAAT GOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!

By the Blessings of Good Cat, This Thread Has Been Made Sacred In Her Sight. She Holds It In Her Paws, And Will Not Let It Be Put Down.
In that sense I agree with my esteemed colleague. The agent of this act, is where we differ.

[Sereg]

Originally Posted by Shadow_Elf

The Cat Pantheon:

Hello, and Welcome to CatPrayer (TM)

Shadowelf hath revealed the truth! Blessings from Cuddles, Leoparddles and Bengal Tigger!

"For he who be-eth not willing to see the light, shalt forevermore remain in the darkness that be-ethSnuggles"-Purrverbs 6:14

[Ravens_cry]

Originally Posted by Sereg

Shadowelf hath revealed the truth! Blessings from Cuddles, Leoparddles and Bengal Tigger!

"For he who be-eth not willing to see the light, shalt forevermore remain in the darkness that be-ethSnuggles"-Purrverbs 6:14

Good Cat goes by many names, Bengal Tigger be but one of them. The Church of The Good Cat approves of this pantheon.

Praise Be To Good Cat, Who Is Bengal Tigger, Who Is The Goddess!
Glory to the Cat Gods, and the Glory that is Cat!

[Sereg]

"And Bengal Tigger didst say, 'Listen to my prophet Ravens Cry, through whom I revealeth many mysteries."-The Book of Roar 3:19

[Ravens_cry]

Originally Posted by Sereg

"And Bengal Tigger didst say, 'Listen to my prophet Ravens Cry, through whom I revealeth many mysteries."-The Book of Roar 3:19

"And Good Cat Did Stretch Contently, And Did Say Unto The People ' I Am As Wind In The Grass, I Speak To All Who Will Listen. Hark To My Prophets Sereg And Shadow Elf, I Shall Give Them Such Truth As Will Be Revealed Unto You, My Beloved Kittens.'"
II Meomix 17:23

[Aegis]

This topic is made of win and... dare I say it?

I dare.

It's made of win and kitten.

[streakster]

Good Cat? Good Cat?

......

Brethren! To arms!

There is no Good Cat! There is no Pantheon! There is but Death, and Snuggles is his Master!

YARN FOR THE YARN THRONE! MILK FOR THE MILK BOWL! CAAAATNIP FOR THE CAAAAAT GOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!!!!!

[Ascension]

I bring you tidings of a third path. Good is an illusion. Evil is an illusion. I'd tell you Law is an illusion, but most of you seem to have figured that out already. All that is real is a writhing sea of CHAOS, a Primordial Elder Cat who waits to plunge us all into gibbering insanity on a day of his choosing. Some false prophets have corrupted him into non-cat entities such as the fictitious Cthulhu, but in truth all such tidings of madness to come refer only to Primordial Cat.

[Ravens_cry]

Cuddles definitely has a place within the Cat Pantheon, but it is these overzealous heretics who are an abomination unto Cat.
Wow, woe unto these blind, dock eared, stuff nosed guides, who froth as dogs with hydrophobia, as canines with rabies. Blindly chasing their own tail, too afraid of the truth that is Cat, and all the Cat Pantheon "
The Letter to the People of the Flea-collar 8:46

[llamamushroom]

In the beginning was the Primordial. And the Primordial was with Cat. And the Primordial was Cat. And so it came to pass that, upon looking out at the Nothing and Emptyness and Void surrounding it, Cat was filled with a great Emptyness, and so strove to fill the Emptyness with it's Unknowable Feline. From Cat's Unknowable Feline, nine aspects were forged, one from each part of Cat's Unknowable ethics. From each aspect there arose a great yowel, and from the yowel all things that were, are, and shall ever come to be were made.

From the Litter, there were two in Opposition, and they were called Snuggles, for it was Great and Unknowable in it's devouring rage, and Good Cat, for it was Great and Unknowable in it's compassionate mercy. Seven more sprang forth from Cat's Unknowable Feline, and they were called Cuddles, Leoparddles, Lionddles, Wuggles,Couggles, Siberian Tigger and Pantheggles, for they were Great and Unknowable in their varied powers.

And so it came to pass that the first of Men, those insignificant and knowable simians, to Understand the Unknowable Cat came to Understand Snuggles...

My First Book Of Cats, Chapter 1

[Chineselegolas]

Woof
Book of Dog. 1:1

[Ravens_cry]

Originally Posted by llamamushroom

In the beginning was the Primordial. And the Primordial was with Cat. And the Primordial was Cat. And so it came to pass that, upon looking out at the Nothing and Emptyness and Void surrounding it, Cat was filled with a great Emptyness, and so strove to fill the Emptyness with it's Unknowable Feline. From Cat's Unknowable Feline, nine aspects were forged, one from each part of Cat's Unknowable ethics. From each aspect there arose a great yowel, and from the yowel all things that were, are, and shall ever come to be were made.

From the Litter, there were two in Opposition, and they were called Snuggles, for it was Great and Unknowable in it's devouring rage, and Good Cat, for it was Great and Unknowable in it's compassionate mercy. Seven more sprang forth from Cat's Unknowable Feline, and they were called Cuddles, Leoparddles, Lionddles, Wuggles,Couggles, Siberian Tigger and Pantheggles, for they were Great and Unknowable in their varied powers.

And so it came to pass that the first of Men, those insignificant and knowable simians, to Understand the Unknowable Cat came to Understand Snuggles...

My First Book Of Cats, Chapter 1

Your Holy Text Does Illuminate Many Dark And Unknown Areas Of The Faith, Filling Me With Brightness And Joy. Its Words Ring of Truth And Clarity, Thanks Be To You In These Dark Times For These Revelations.
Glory Be To Cat And The Cat Gods!

[FoE]

Seriously, the new religion(s) needs banners or something. Possibly dozens of worshippers bowing before a huge cat idol ....?

[llamamushroom]

Snuggles, in its Great and Unknowable devouring rage, fell upon its peers, and unto Cat didst yowl "Alone of Cat's Great and Unknowable aspects do I rule! My Dominion is Terrible, and with none of the Litter will I share power! Mine was the First Believer, and Mine shall be all Believers, that I might Toy with their everlasting souls in unending torment!"

In hearing the yowl of Snuggles, in its Great and Unknowable devouring rage, Good Cat didst yowl "Away from me, Snuggles! Yea, be Gone from within my sight! Your Dominion is not Terrible, For with the whole of the Litter must you share, or from you Cat, in its Unknowable Feline, will withold the Sweetmeats of Power and the Pie of Dominion!"

Upon hearing the yowls of Snuggles, in its Great and Unknowable devouring rage, and Good Cat, in its Great and Unknowable compassionate mercy, both in opposition to the other, Cat, the Unknowable Feline, with the Eternal Primordial, did cast away Snuggles and Good Cat, in their Great and Unknowable opposition, yowling "From my Great and Unknowable Feline wast thou made, and so thou makest war, one against the other! So I shall cast thee from my teat, nevermore to speak nor smell nor hear of thee, until once more you are made one with Cat and the Eternal Primordial."

Having seen the treatment of their Litter's Greatest and Most Unknowable, the further seven didst remark amongst themselves, "Surely it is with the Litter that the Litter should ally, not with Cat in its Unknowable Feline and the Eternal Primordial?" And so it came to pass that the Litter did leave Cat, only to be united with the others Away from Cat. Upon uniting, however, Snuggles, in its Great and Unknowable devouring rage, once again fell upon its peers, but didst yowl not. The Litter, seeing Snuggles' Great and Unknowable devouring rage, united against it, and didst cast Snuggles away from their Feline persons.

Once this accomplishment became known to Cat and the Eternal Primordial, Cat, the Unknowable Feline, didst decree "As my Litter cannot be united without making war, one against the other, it shall come to pass that never again will an aspect of Cat be together with another. In such a way will I protect all that is, was, and evermore shall be!"

And so Cat, the Unknowable Feline, did protect all of its Creation. So ends the First Lesson.

My First Book Of Cats, Chapter 1 ii

[Anonymous Man]

Originally Posted by Chineselegolas

Woof
Book of Dog. 1:1

BLASTHEPHEMY!

CATNIP FOR THE CAT GODS! YARN FOR THE YARN THRONES! MILK FOR THE MILK BOWL! ALL HAIL THE CATS!