1001 Funny Living spells

[Pink]

Living Blindness: The last thing you see.

[Nahal]

Living Nightmare/Sleep. Possibly not kosher per RAW, but come on. "GAH! Oh gods I had the worst dream I was being eaten by a spell oh my gods it's real!"

(whack-THUD)

"GAH! Oh gods I had the worst dream I was being eaten by a spell oh my gods..." etc

Just thank the powers that nobody's breaking out the BoEF

[Tyrael]

NewbQuestion: What IS a Living spell?

[MusScribe]

Living Enlarge Person?

Living Astral Projection/Etherealness?

Living Zone of Truth (or Living Zone of Silence)?


Walking around, the scout sees the ooze up ahead. He tries to shout for help and nothing comes out.

[Lord Iames Osari]

Just thank the powers that nobody's breaking out the BoEF

I can do that!

Living Grope, for starters.

[Lord Nyax]

What would a living Prismatic Sphere look like?
It would be so cool to encounter one of those...

[Mewtarthio]

Living Nightmare/Sleep. Possibly not kosher per RAW, but come on. "GAH! Oh gods I had the worst dream I was being eaten by a spell oh my gods it's real!"

(whack-THUD)

"GAH! Oh gods I had the worst dream I was being eaten by a spell oh my gods..." etc

Just thank the powers that nobody's breaking out the BoEF

"I dreamed that a DROWZEE was eating my dreams. ...Hey, where'd this TM come from?"

A cookie to anyone who actually remembers that line.

...And is that spell from the BoEF real? That's insulting! Seriously, what's the point when you've already got Mage Hand and Telekinesis? Did nobody teach these people Mordenkainen's Law of Spell Efficiency? The inventor of TK spells should seriously consider suing: This is just a bunch of old spells repackaged into something for the foolish teenage wizards! Bah, this world is going completely downhill, and I'm not just talking about the impending demonic invasion...

[Belteshazzar]

Living Baleful Polymorph: The city is now the zoo
Living Polymorph Any Object: Welcome to madness
Living Summon Animal: Badger, Badger, Badger, Badger....
Living Unseen Servant: Over-helpful much?
Living Bigby's Hand: "It pimp-smacked me through the wall then just wandered away
Living Knock/ Telekinesis/ and Tenzer's Disk: The ultimate looter

[Pink]

"I dreamed that a DROWZEE was eating my dreams. ...Hey, where'd this TM come from?"

A cookie to anyone who actually remembers that line.

The guy behind the shrub in Vermillion city of pokemon red/blue. Give me cookie.

[Lord Iames Osari]

...And is that spell from the BoEF real? That's insulting! Seriously, what's the point when you've already got Mage Hand and Telekinesis?

Actually, it is different because it transmits the sensations back to the caster.

Some more:

Living Wet Dreams

Living Seduction

Living Orgasmic Vibrations

[Stevenson]

A living slay living. Oh, the conundrum madness.

Living contagion-how the black plague happened.

[I_Got_This_Name]

NewbQuestion: What IS a Living spell?

A template from Eberron. Short form: imput one or more spells, get an ooze that uses the spell whenever it hits anything.

[Viscount Einstrauss]

Living Evard's Black Tentacles. 'Course, this really isn't very strange at all in any Japan-flavored games.

[MusScribe]

Could you (theoretically) breed living spells? (If nothing else, get a Living Polymorph Any Object and a Living Awaken together with at least one other - the Polymorph makes them animals and the Awaken makes them intelligent...)

If so...

Breed a Living Soul Bind / Wail of the Banshee...

It would be an amazing guardian for a village of Living Spells... Especcially if it's got a Create Greater Undead. (Even if not, having the three of them teaming up would be a dangerous combination...)


Dang... now I'm imagining a party of intelligent Living Spells going out to adventure to save their village from the 'normal' races...

[NecroPaladin]

Living Evard's Black Tentacles. 'Course, this really isn't very strange at all in any Japan-flavored games.

That and living extend tentacle (it's actually a spell, look it up).



Hmm...well, a living mending would be a teeny lil blob that goes around fixing various small objects without you knowing...

A living animate object would be hellish if it got into your kitchen.

A living ghost candle would be a floating, squishy hand that follows you wherever you go, showing you visions of doom,

And a living cloudkill would effectively be a big, sentient fart.

[ExHunterEmerald]

Living Tongues.
Can't believe nobody thought of that one.

[NecroPaladin]

Living Tongues.
Can't believe nobody thought of that one.

Would it just...jibber?

[Nahal]

Living Teleport for much funny. Especially if it's automatically a mishap.

Living Plane shift for similar evilness.

[MusScribe]

Living Magic Mouth/Tongues, possibly with Living Permanency...

Talking (probably random combinations of messages) in every language under a specific condition (or, if permanent, it could be constantly randomly speaking)


... Living Feeblemind :)

[Ninja Chocobo]

Would it just...jibber?

Yes. But everyone would understand it.

[melchizedek]

Living Alarm: It makes a sound when it hits you
Living Light: It makes you glow

[Manir]

Living Resurrection: It makes other stuff live.

[Turcano]

Living Disjunction. You know you want to. Also, it's technically perfectly legal.

Yeah, that's real funny. If you're a Communist.

Living Evard's Black Tentacles. Yeah.

I'm not sure if hold portal is a legal one, but that would probably qualify as the most useless living spell.

[Nahal]

Not true. Living Light.

Also living Read Magic.

[Kyace]

Yeah, that's real funny. If you're a Communist.

Living Evard's Black Tentacles. Yeah.

I'm not sure if hold portal is a legal one, but that would probably qualify as the most useless living spell.

Living detect evil/good/magic/thoughts? If it hits you, the mindless blob knows if you're evil or not. At least hold portal does something.

[Viscount Einstrauss]

New one- Living Maze. The single most annoying monster encounter ever devised.

[Illiterate Scribe]

Living planar bubbles are always fun, especially when you stack the traits.

[GolemsVoice]

Living Magic Mouth: Annoyance at Elan-Levels
Living Summon Monster: A blob that summons and summons and summons...
Living Speak with dead: Lost in Translation

[bosssmiley]

Living Defenestrating Sphere. Loves to hurl people skywards.

[Belkarseviltwin]

Living Disjunction. You know you want to. Also, it's technically perfectly legal.

And therein lies a tale...

My entry for the "kill elminster" contest on another board was a Living Disjunction with a Vow of Poverty Monk inside it.