Crack Pairings Matchup Table

[Zanaril]

Lets also hope it doesn't then sink into obscurity like the HoHs seem to have done.

Although I suppose a new thread would then just rise up to take it's place...


Also what's with the holy lemon?

[Zen_Heart]

Jeeze, I'm gone for a bit and suddenly we have a banner!

*shifty eyes* *steals banner and starts posting it in sig*

Different couples to draw? Oh God... Anything with Belkar would probably be perfectly in spirit with the thread... maybe just a jumble of really random characters... I'd probably like to see more Zz'dtri because I have realized how little love the poor guy/girl gets...

By the way, how do you link something someplace else? I happen to be one of the least tech-savvy people who has ever been born during the digital/computer era.

EDIT: Never mind about the linking thing. I remembered that I actually do know how to do that.

ANOTHER EDIT: Never mind on the last edit. I found out that images are a whole new ballgame.

[Milskidasith]

Draw a banner for my over a dozen person matchup. We can't write a story for it, but we damn sure can try to draw a banner for it! I think it was on early page 9 or 10.

[Lira]

ANOTHER EDIT: Never mind on the last edit. I found out that images are a whole new ballgame.

To link an image to a page, use this code:

[URL="url of page you want the link to go to"][img]url of image[/img][/URL]

So, to link the banner to this thread, here's the correct code:
[URL="http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=111631"][img]http://i260.photobucket.com/albums/ii21/Zanaril/OOTSart/bannervxzzdtri.png[/img][/URL]
Which turns out to:

[Zanaril]

Different couples to draw? Oh God... Anything with Belkar would probably be perfectly in spirit with the thread... maybe just a jumble of really random characters... I'd probably like to see more Zz'dtri because I have realized how little love the poor guy/girl gets...

I'm a bit worn out for now with regards to banner making, but I'll give BelkarxSomeone a go tomorrow.

I'll also add some with different text if anyone comes up with something good.

ANOTHER EDIT: Never mind on the last edit. I found out that images are a whole new ballgame.

Put this in fron of the image tag :

[URL="http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=111631"]

then this after it:

[/URL]



Darn ninjas.

[The Dark Fiddler]

Also what's with the holy lemon?

Angels and Demons week. A few weeks early. Oh well.

That circle is a character in the art style I would use if I made a webcomic.

[Zen_Heart]

Thank you, guys! :D

I'm going to work on a little more of my crack story. Trying to put Belkar in a romance is like wrestling a bugbear into a cage with your bare hands.

[waterpenguin43]

My rolls were Thog and Roy's sword in true love on a desert island.
Enjoy .
Edit: Rolled again, Kazumi and Vaarsivius in the afterlife in police/militant uniforms.

[The Dark Fiddler]

Thank you, guys! :D

I'm going to work on a little more of my crack story. Trying to put Belkar in a romance is like wrestling a bugbear into a cage with your bare hands.

Huh... what level are we?

[The Blackbird]

Huh... what level are we?

Depends how much XP do you gain making crack pairings?

[The Dark Fiddler]

Well, now we need the CR for them.

[Cracklord]

Right.
Table 4 has a CR of 12, table 3 has a CR of 9, table 2has a CR of 6 and table 1 a CR of 3.

[Milskidasith]

So what level would you need to be to have a chance against my uber crack pairing from a few pages ago?

[Zanaril]

Bah. Plot. This story was supposed to be shorter than the first one, but it won't stop writing itself.

Spoiler

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Vaarsuvius walked into the bar where the rest of the Order were waiting, adjusting the clasp of the hurredly donned cloak. Durkon was sat next to Roy and Belkar had his furry feet propped up on the table, idly flicking a dagger back and forth between his fingers. Haley was already seated across the table next to Elan, pointedly looking away from the elf.

Roy glanced between them and raised an eyebrow. "Everything okay?"

"Yes."

"It is."

"Well then." He cleared his throat, pulling towards him one of the maps scattered across the table. "We're currently here" He pointed to a unremarkable place in a large area of green. "And the next nearest village is a good ten days walk away because the path winds around these mountains here" He pointed to the map again.

"However, Haley's been asking around and there's apparently a small pass across the mountains that, as luck has it, is accessable at this time of year. If we take it we can cut our journey down to five days or less - weather permitting - and instead of going to Crag's End, we can go to Ivyleaf, which will take us on a much more direct route south."

Vaarsuvius began to fidget.

"Once we get there we can restock and purchase horses - the road is a lot more major after that, so it will be easier going. Assuming we make good time, we can expect to make it to the dessert in a little over a fortnight. Any questions?"

"Maybe V can give us some advice. This is the Elven Homeland after all." Haley said, still avoiding meeting the elf's eyes.

"Advice? Oh, well..." V paused for a moment, indecision playing across worried features. "If you asked me... I'd say we would be better off forgetting about going to Ivyleaf and making our way to Crag's End. If people don't use the pass, there's a good reason for it and it would be better we take the long route rather than taking what may be a shortcut, but may also result in us being lead astray, costing us more than the additional time that we would take going around the mountains."

"That's your final opinion?" Roy asked uncertainly.

"That it is."

"Well... I suppose you know the terrain better than any of us. It's settled; we'll need to stock up on extra supplies for a longer journey, but if we push the pace, I suppose it's only five days lost." He still looked doubtful.

"Unless anyone else has anything to say?"

"Yes." Haley said so sharply that Elan jumped slightly. "I think we should go over the pass. It's well used at the moment, and more than one person recommended it. What's more, Ivyleaf seems to be a much busier town than Crag's Edge - the merchants I spoke to were all headed there - and that means we're much more likely to be able to get horses and any other gear we'll need further on."

Roy looked down thoughtfully, tapping the map lightly with a calloused finger. "I'm afraid I'm going to have to agree with Haley, V. It seems a much better option." Roy then looked up, smiling.
"Right then group, get whatever further supplies you need today, because we'll be setting off first thing tomorrow morning. And get a good night's sleep!"

The various members of the Order got up from the table, and Haley rose quickly, making for the door. Vaarsuvius started to go after her, before realising it was ill advised, and insead turned to head back up the stairs.

I worry I'm making Haley a bit too harsh, but someone needs to be.

[The Dark Fiddler]

Of course it writes itself, its epic.

Well, not Level-wise, but still.

[Zanaril]

Of course it writes itself, its epic.

Well, not Level-wise, but still.

Thanks!

Oh, and if anyone gets a message about signatures, that was me messing up over the banner width and having it 486 pixels instead of 468. Darn those extra 18 pixels.

Sorry if I got anyone in trouble. I've fixed the image size now.

[doliest]

It alright if I join in on this signature advertising?

[MReav]

Alright: Here's TsukikoxFlesh Golem Roy.

Spoiler

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Redcloak knocked on the door to Tsukiko's room. It was important. He needed the TPS reports and Jirix had given the job to Tsukiko. Alright, it was more he won a bet with her and gave her the job. but the lack of professionalism irritated Redcloak to no small degree. He could also tell she was ignoring him. He could hear the bedsqueaking from this side of the door.

"I don't have time for this." Redcloak says to himself, "Ethereal Jaunt!" Normally, he'd be appalled to waste a seventh level spell so frivolously, but he wasn't using it for anything else, and he had a backup anyways. "TSUKIKO! I need that damned TPS report no..."

His eyes were greeted with Tsukiko in a french maid costume, mounting a corpse. A strangely familiar corpse, but Redcloak couldn't quite put his finger on it given all the stitches and semi-dried out nature of it. The fact that she was doing this did not surprise him... until he realized the corpse did not smell right. It wasn't... properly dead for lack of a better term.

"Ever hear of knocking?" Tsukiko said angrily.

"I did several times. I need that TPS report. It's already 2 hours late!" Redcloak said, trying his best to ignore both her and her bedmate's ugly human physiology. He couldn't help but notice the report was incomplete and in the living room.

"It's been that long?" Tsukiko said, acting surprised, "Wow, I bet Xykon could never keep up with you my love! I guess I don't need to impress that old bag of bones anymore."

Redcloak's wisdom and sense motive scores were too high to be fooled. "Look, I try not to judge. As far as I'm concerned, you being a human already makes me think too lowly about you, but this is pathetic."

"How dare you imply our love is anything but the purest pure. Set him straight Ray!"

"Roooooooy...." The flesh golem mumbled.

"Whatever! Tell this nonbeliever how our love is nothing but true."

"Loooooooove...." The flesh golem mumbled.

"See? It's true. We love... love... Oh Ray, I love you too much to lie. I'm not over Xykon. I'm just using you to make him jealous." To Redcloak's surprise, this was the first bit of honesty out of her all night. "I mean, at first, that's all I wanted to do. Make Xykon jealous. But you've been such a great listener and this foray into artificial instead of dead has made me so excited, I think I am falling for you... but I... I want Xykon more! I know! He's totally out of my league and doesn't swing that way, but he's so powerful and I've always had a thing for older skeletons. I'm sure you'll understand Ray. It's not you, it's me. I just can't let this go on any more. I don't want to hurt you any more that I already have."

Redcloak stood there, watching this scene unfold. He had one response. "Excuse me. I need to wash my brain out with Clorox."

As he turned to leave, he heard a mumbling from 'Roy'.

"T...P...S...." Standing there, was the flesh golem while Tsukiko got changed, holding out the report. Redcloak took it and with a quick look through, realized it was properly done.

"You did this?" Redcloak asked, genuinely surprised.

"Mrgh."

"Thank you." Redcloak said, blushing.

For some reason, I have envisioned: MikoxRedcloak, at a counselling session for abusive relationships.

[xelliea]

Please do! And maybe link the image to this thread?

Will do it now.

[Cracklord]

Lord Shojo and Julio Scoundrel. Is it just me or does this pairing seem oddly... right? Albeit another gay one, which I am really sick of.
Anyway, here we go

Spoiler

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Atop the citadel, too old, tired men watched the city to burn.
"What are you thinking? asked the tall one, turning to stare at his companion. He had the look of a master athlete whose bones were beginning to fail him, but his stomach was still flat as a board and heavily muscled as a man half his age.
His face was perfect, as though someone had taken Balder's and added laughter lines and just the lurking hint of crows feet, and brushed his hair into a steel grey warriors braid and added long, luxurious, expertly waxed mustachios.
His companion and been worn down by the years, his hair peppered with silver and iron grey, his frame stooped and his body drooping. He looked like a strong man gone to seed, his once impressive frame now drooping with age and a pot belly. There was an oddly mischievous spark in his eye, but it was muted by a sadness he seemed to wear like a shroud.
He shrugs, his stoop disappearing for the second "Would have been, might have been, could have been." He muttered, blinking rapidly.
"Regrets then?"
"Never."
They looked down again. Women and children were being put to the sword, an organized retreat had turned into a rout, and the city was lost. He had a place on his private junk, but he'd decided against it. He owed it to every one of the men who died for the city to watch their final moments.
"We'll get through it." His companion said, taking his hand in a reassuring squeeze. Shojo looked at him pityingly, but Julio was in his element, sweeping his arm in a dramatic gesture that would have made Elan weep.
"Hinjo will take back the city, and you'll watch him put up a sign. 'Here two old men fought their enemies to the last in high style, and here they sleep in high style.' Or something like that." He says in a rich voice that elicits a soft chuckle from Shojo. Julio always knew how to make him smile.
"So what about you? Going to die with a clear conscious?"
"Gods no, man. I've done some pretty bad things. Fun, but bad. Only one regret, though." He says, serious again.
"Really?" Shojo askes, although he knew what meant. Thirty years ago. So long? It seemed like yesterday. He remembered the soft, fiery feeling of Julio's lips against his, and the sweet taste of whiskey and sugar and pine and the faintest hint of copper. He'd been hot, so hot he'd burned against Shojo's flesh, and yat he'd drank in that heat, let it consume him, fill him with it's warmth until it had stopped and left him empty. They had both said it hadn't meant anything, yet after all this time here they were, standing together, remembering that brief, shinning moment in their lives.
Julio sighed. Suddenly he has to know. "Do you ever wish..."
"No." Shojo lies expertly, his voice admirably steady as he returns his gaze to his city, and the people he'd sacrificed so much for, even what had perhaps been his only chance at happiness and love. Maybe the gods were cruel after all.
"No. Me neither."

[Zanaril]

Lord Shojo and Julio Scoundrel. Is it just me or does this pairing seem oddly...Right?

It's... it's beautiful.

Albeit another gay one, which I am really sick of.

Probably about two thirds of all shipping fanfics are slash, so this is pretty typical.

Also there are more male OOTS characters than female characters, so slash pairings are statistically more likely if you're using the tables.

[Cracklord]

It means a lot to hear you say that. Thank you.

[Weimann]

I must say Julio/Shojo was very well done. Subtle, low-keyed, in character.

Also, I just have a thing for these "calmly accepting apocalypse" scenarios.

[Cracklord]

Any suggestions for my next foray into this?

[Zanaril]

Durkon and Lien.

---

And here's more plot:

Spoiler

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Haley wasn't sure where she intended to go, she just wanted to go somewhere out of the way of everyone else while she worked out what she should do. She was somewhat angry and certainly disappointed at her friend, but knew that unless the elf wanted her advice, Vaarsuvius would brush of any inquiries with that formal, aloof mannerism the elf resorted to when bothered.

But mostly, Haley was worried. She knew she had overreacted, but while Vaarsuvius had never been very forthcoming with personal information, they been friends long enough that Haley recall the V mentioning small details about the elf's family, always with a fond smile crossing thin lips. If V had spontaneously begun a new relationship, something significant had happened that Haley had missed.

In her musings, her feet had led he to a street that she recalled having a small tavern. It would be somewhere to sit and think, and if that failed, a way to temporarily quiet her misgivings.

She entered the tavern and crossed over to the bar. It wasn't until after she had sat down and ordered a drink that her eyes adjusted to the lower light enough for her to notice who else was there, also intent on drowning his sorrows.

***

Vaarsuvius poked a head round the door.

The room was empty.

"Drat."

Things are about to get interesting.

[Dark Faun]

Marrerism? What's that?

I like it.

Durkon and Lien.

I suddenly remember an old picture from one of the Houses with Durkon and Lien...

[Zanaril]

Marrerism? What's that?

A combination of me thinking the "r" key is the "n" key, and me not spell checking.

[TheBibliophile]

Yay, my banner works! Nice job, Zanaril!

Any tips on writing fanfic? I've tried, but it just doesn't come naturally to me. Advice would be appreciated.

[Zanaril]

Yay, my banner works! Nice job, Zanaril!

Any tips on writing fanfic? I've tried, but it just doesn't come naturally to me. Advice would be appreciated.

Just practice. I'm half way through your sci-fi story and you're a good writer.

One thing you could try doing is reading what you've written out loud. There's one or two places where things are phrased a bit awkwardly, which are easy to miss while you're writing.

[Weimann]

I'm not a master myself, but a few things I usually try when I get stuck is this. These are more tips on how to get yourself going than on how to write a good story (for which there is only one answer: training), but I hope that's what you are asking :)

# Write about stuff you want to write about. That doensn't only include choosing a franchise you like, but also the details you include in your work. Want to write about how Haley dexteriously avoid a couple of guards during a break-in? Then write about that, exactly that, and leave the motivation for the break-in at a few back references. By writing the awesome chase scenes instead of the dull build-up, you maintain motivation and lust for the project.

# Don't worry about length. Short and finished is much better than an intended epic that just collects dust.

# Don't worry about how well underbuilt your story is. Much fanfiction is utterly ludicrous. It's part of the package. V falling in love with Zz'drit (?) is a lousy plot twist in the comic, but it appearantly works wonderful in a fanfic.

I hope those tips helped :)