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  1. - Top - End - #1

    Default Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    Hello, and welcome to the sixth Crack Pairings thread. If you haven't read the previous ones yet, you can do so here, here, here, here, and here.

    Or, if you don't wish to read through all 250 pages, here's the short version: we have a roller and some tables. You roll a pairing, and maybe a plot device, then you write it, draw it, act it out, interpretive dance it, whatever! Apparently we like this sort of thing.

    Please remember to keep it clean, folks! The board rules still apply!

    Quote Originally Posted by Roland St. Jude View Post
    Sheriff of Moddingham: ...Seriously, if you want to continue crack pairings, keep it to fictional characters and board-appropriate.
    You heard the sheriff, don't test the title and keep in mind the above warning about the rules.

    When posting a pairing, please at least try to do something with it. We like it when people try!

    New: Sure, we won't be winning any Oscars or anything, but that doesn't mean we can't have our own little awards.

    Should you wish to roll a pairing, Sgeo coded up a roller for us. If you want that personal touch, go roll on the tables, or make up your own pairing!

    Banners!
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    Image hosting sites only allow pictures to get a small amount of bandwidth. If you could, please upload banners to an account of your own to not use as much bandwidth for our talented artists, 'less all the beautiful banners disappear.

    Text:


    Zanaril's
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    Funky Goose's
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    Discord's
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    Saeyan
    Spoiler
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    rangermania
    Spoiler
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    Trixie
    Spoiler
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    MReav
    Spoiler
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    Kaytara
    Spoiler
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    half-halfling
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    Felyndiira
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    Tables!
    Spoiler
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    Initial Table
    Roll 2d6 (or more!) decide which tables to pick the characters from.
    1. OotS Table 1
    2. OotS Table 2
    3. OotS Table 3
    4. OotS Table 4
    5. Minion List
    6. Dead Guy List


    Table 1 - By Minion992929
    1. Roy
    2. Durkon
    3. Celia
    4. Xykon
    5. Tsukiko
    6. Vaarsuvius
    7. Monster in The Dark
    8. Miko
    9. Nale
    10. Elan
    11. Haley
    12. Belkar
    13. Lord Shojo
    14. Redcloak
    15. Hinjo
    16. Daigo
    17. Kazumi
    18. Inkyrius
    19. Roll again twice
    20. Roll again and switch gender


    Table 2 - By Minion 992929
    1. The Guy with a halberd
    2. Sarah Greenhilt
    3. Haley's dad
    4. Thanh
    5. Julio Scoundrél
    6. Mr. Rodriguez
    7. Horace Greenhilt
    8. Therkla
    9. Zz'Dtri
    10. YokYok
    11. Leeky Windstaff
    12. The Cliffport chief of police
    13. Windstriker
    14. Jirix
    15. Lien
    16. Argent
    17. Yor
    18. Roll again twice
    19. Roll again on twice on Initial Table
    20. Roll again and switch gender


    Table 3 - By Minion992929
    1. Soon Kim (incorporeal)
    2. Shadowdancer
    3. Hilgya
    4. Dorukan
    5. Bozzok
    6. Crystal
    7. Bandit King
    8. Ancient Black Dragon
    9. O-Chul
    10. The Snarl
    11. The Eye of Fear and Flame
    12. Lord Kubota
    13. Thog
    14. Julia Greenhilt
    15. Belkar
    16. The oracle
    17. Jephton/Haerta/Ganneron
    18. Roll again twice on Initial Table
    19. Roll again twice
    20. Roll again and switch gender


    Table 4 - By Minion 992929
    1. The dragon's hoard
    2. The chimera
    3. The really dangerous trap
    4. Roy's Archon
    5. The Hydra
    6. Teevo
    7. Xykon's zombie dragon head
    8. Roy's sword
    9. The entire Hobgoblin army
    10. The orc chieftain
    11. The IFCC
    12. Durkon while under the effects of Thor's might
    13. Mr Scruffy
    14. Hieronymus Grubwiggler
    15. All of the Demon Roaches at once
    16. Bone golem Roy
    17. Roll again twice
    18. Roll again on Tables 1, 2, and 3
    19. Roll again twice on Initial Table
    20. Roll again and switch gender


    Minion List -Made By MReav
    1. Goblin
    2. Hobgoblin
    3. Kobold
    4. Ogre
    5. Lizardfolk
    6. Bug-people
    7. Azure City Soldier
    8. Bandit or Thieves Guild Member
    9. Orc
    10. Owlbear
    11. Troll (flip coin to determine land or sea)
    12. Zombie
    13. Ghoul
    14. City Guardsman
    15. Angel-thing
    16. Ghost Martyr
    17. Roll again on another table.
    18. Roll again twice
    19. Roll Again and invert alignment
    20. Roll again for minion army


    Dead Guy List -Made By MReav
    1. Samantha
    2. Sangwaan
    3. Hobgoblin General
    4. Azure City General
    5. Death Knight
    6. Huecva
    7. Trigak
    8. Earth Dungeon Guardian
    9. Fire Dungeon Guardian
    10. Kraagor
    11. Mijung
    12. Eugene Greenhilt
    13. Old Blind Pete
    14. Giant Devil
    15. Buggy-Lou
    16. Isamu.
    17. Roll Again on a different table
    18. Roll Again Twice
    19. Roll Again and Switch Gender
    20. Roll again. If you roll this option twice in a row: Eastern Pantheon and World 1.0


    Supplemental Plot Devices
    Roll 1d4 (or more!)
    1. Table 1
    2. Table 2
    3. Table 3
    4. Table 4


    Table 1 - By Nerdanel
    1. Unrequited love
    2. Love potion
    3. Drunkenness
    4. Snowed in
    5. Stuck on a desert island
    6. In the afterlife
    7. Aliens Made Them Do It (not necessarily literal aliens)
    8. True love
    9. Love/hate relationship
    10. Adultery
    11. Pregnancy (use male pregnancy if needed)
    12. Pink frills and white lace
    13. French maid costume
    14. Police/military uniform
    15. High heels and black leather
    16. American high school setting
    17. Someone is a vampire
    18. Everyone is a furry version of themselves
    19. Kidnapped (By somebody inside or outside of the pairing)
    20. Roll again twice


    Table 2 - by Sereg
    1. Dream Sequence
    2. Anonymous Dating Service
    3. Bodyswapped
    4. Meta
    5. Curse
    6. Spell gone wrong
    7. Damsel/dude in distress
    8. Lots and lots of angst (because then it will be true art)
    9. Amnesia
    10. Mistaken identity
    11. Genre shift
    12. Finding “new uses” for objects
    13. The real world
    14. Geas/Quest
    15. Zone of Truth
    16. Truth, dare or command
    17. Voyeurism
    18. In a playground
    19. Roll again twice
    20. Roll again on another table


    Table 3 - by Sereg
    1. Fulfilling an unusual fantasy (as demonstrated in Coffee Included’s V x Haley x Elan with Belkar watching fic)
    2. Arranged marriage
    3. Already married
    4. Prostitution
    5. Concubines
    6. Inheritance of wealth and/or title from obscure dead relative
    7. Class change/multiclassing
    8. Team Evil is trying to save the world from the Oots’ plan to control/release the snarl
    9. Past/future life
    10. In 20 years from current comic
    11. They discover that they are close relatives at the end
    12. Disease
    13. “The whole party is controlled by giant space cats and Xykon is from modern Earth”
    14. Deus ex machina
    15. With the author or another crack-pairer (not in the ship itself, though)
    16. Narrated by somebody
    17. On the web-site
    18. Lampshading (roll again)
    19. Roll again twice
    20. Roll again on another table


    Table 4 - by Sereg
    1. While arguing with the author
    2. It’s not them, it’s their players/character sheets/stat blocks/minis/dice (Yes, I know that this isn’t a game, but when have we let canon stand in our way?)
    3. To make someone else jealous
    4. To save the world
    5. Mind-control
    6. Twins separated at birth
    7. This is what the snarl actually does
    8. In a watery environment
    9. While under attack
    10. Because of a literal genie
    11. Because if they don’t they’ll die/get unmade
    12. On the rebound
    13. In jail/a dungeon
    14. While playing strip-(insert game here)
    15. Wardrobe malfunction
    16. On meds
    17. As part of their therapy
    18. With a giant
    19. With a subversion/aversion/inversion/double subversion of (roll again)
    20. Roll again twice



    Of course, feel free to make up your own pairings!
    Last edited by The Dark Fiddler; 2010-02-03 at 06:28 PM.
    It's been a bit, GitP. If you're reading this, you're either digging through old stuff, or I've posted for the first time in forever.

    If you want to stay in touch, reach out to me on twitter (same username).

    The best answer is always to ask your DM.
    Unless you're the DM, in which case you should talk to your players.

  2. - Top - End - #2
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Lira's Avatar

    Join Date
    May 2007

    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    Crack Pairings Story Index

    Stories by Asta Kask
    Stories by badam104172
    Stories by baf
    Stories by BatRobin
    Stories by Belkster11
    Stories by The Blackbird
    Stories by TheBibliophile
    Stories by CapedLuigiYoshi
    Stories by Cire II
    Stories by ClericOfBelker
    Stories by Closak
    Stories by CoffeeIncluded
    Stories by Cracklord
    Miko/Durkon
    Inkyrius/Bozzok
    O-Chul/Thog
    Therkla/Crystal
    Nale/The Shadow Dancer/Soulsplice
    Tsukiko/Soon
    Leeky Windstaff/Lord Kubota
    Teevo/Thanh
    O-Chul/Chief Grukgruk
    Bozzok/Tsukiko/Crystal
    Nale/Hinjo/O-Chul/Julia
    Xykon/Thog
    Edward Cullen/Harry Potter/Raistlin Majere/Xykon/Tsukiko/Lien/Stanley the Tool/Winston Churchill
    Xykon/Julio Scoundrel
    Belkar/Jenny
    Eugene/Ydranna
    Bozzok/Haley
    Lord Shojo/Julio Scoundrel
    Durkon/Lien
    Durkon/Lien
    Durkon/Lien
    Durkon/Lien
    Durkon/Lien [The Beginning]
    Julia Greenhilt/Xykon
    Bozzok/Zz'Dtri
    Julia/Roy's Sword
    Durkon/Lien
    Roy/Sabine
    Shojo/Miko
    Durkon/Lien
    Belkar in Hell [Part 1]
    Belkar in Hell [Part 2]
    Belkar in Hell [Part 3]
    Belkar in Hell [Part 4]
    Belkar in Hell [Part 5]
    Belkar in Hell [Part 6]
    Soon Kim/Mijung
    Durkon/Lien
    The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 1]
    The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 2]
    The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 3]
    The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 4]
    The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 5]
    The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 6]
    The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 7]
    The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 8]
    The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 9]
    Stories by CurlyKitGirl
    Stories by Dak Frostwrath
    Stories by Dark Apprentice
    Stories by The Dark Fiddler
    Stories by DarkElfGangsta
    Stories by Dark_Stryke
    Stories by Discord
    Stories by doliest
    Stories by Dra-Goon
    Stories by Dr.Gunsforhands
    Stories by Elan's Modron
    Stories by Elvenblade
    Stories by esmerelder
    Stories by EvilRoeSlade
    Stories by Expeditious
    Stories by Eztheria
    Stories by Forevernade
    Stories by Gimliggamer
    Stories by golentan
    Stories by gosh
    Stories by Hijax
    Stories by icastflare!
    Stories by Introbulus
    Stories by jogiff
    Stories by Kaytara
    Stories by Kill Screen
    Stories by Kirby
    Stories by Kitteh
    Stories by KnightMysterio
    Stories by Kobold-Bard
    Stories by Kraggi
    Stories by Kyronea
    Stories by Kyuubi
    Stories by Lawyergoblin
    Stories by lindorm
    Stories by Lollie
    Stories by Lubirio
    Stories by Lycan 01
    Stories by MagicianMan5
    Stories by Malkar Grumbo
    Stories by Mariel Dragon
    Stories by MasamuneSSX
    Stories by Meg
    Stories by Metalhead
    Stories by mizzim
    Stories by Monzach
    Stories by Moofin Bard
    Stories by Moon_Called
    Stories by MReav
    Stories by Mr. Cales
    Stories by NamonakiRei
    Stories by Nathander
    Stories by NemoUtopia
    Stories by Nerdanel
    Stories by The Odor
    Stories by Omergideon
    Stories by Oooohaloophole
    Stories by Pid6
    Stories by pnewman
    Stories by PsychoPat
    Stories by Ronnoc
    Stories by RPGAgmJAY
    Stories by Saeyan
    Stories by SaintRidley
    Stories by Sequinox
    Stories by Sereg
    Roy/Celia
    Xykon/Celia
    Tsukiko/Horace Greenhilt
    Xykon/Redcloak [Part 1]
    Xykon/Redcloak [Part 2]
    Dragon's Hoard/Jephton/Haerta/Ganneron
    Durkon/Death Knight
    Pit Fiend/Zz'dtri
    Therkla/Thieves Guild Member
    Durkon/Vaarsuvius
    Mr. Scruffy/Snuggles
    Therkla/Banjo
    Elan/Vaarsuvius
    Julia/Durkon
    Belkar/Nacle
    Belkar/Crystal
    Vaarsuvius/Haley's Personality Aspects
    Haley/Celia
    Roy/Eugene
    Julio Scoundrel/Julio Scoundrel
    Thog/Miko [Part 1]
    Thog/Miko [Part 2]
    Thog/Miko [Part 3]
    Thog/Miko [Part 4]
    Thog/Miko [Part 5]
    Sereg/Tsukiko
    Sereg/Lien
    Sereg/Inkyrius
    Sereg/Vaarsuvius
    Sereg/Celia
    Sereg/Haley
    Sereg/Lirian
    Sereg/Sabine
    Hobgoblin General/Roy’s Sword/Roy’s Archon/Person in Distress
    Durkon/Tree
    Ghouls/Belkar [Part 1]
    Ghouls/Belkar [Part 2]
    Hieronymus Grubwiggler/The Eye of Fear and Flame
    Lizardfolk/Durkon
    Mary Sue/OOTS
    A Twisted TailBanjo/Xykon-doll
    Xykon/Tsukiko
    Tsukiko/Crypt Thing
    Miko/Jirix/Really Dangerous Trap
    Vaarsuvius/Dark Mistress Shadowgale
    Miko/Sangwaan
    Stories by Sewblon
    Stories by ShinyDelusion
    Stories by ShneekeyTheLost
    Stories by Silverraptor
    Stories by Somniloquist
    Stories by Sstoopidtallkid
    Stories by Taekwondodo
    Stories by Tatterdemalion
    Stories by Thor Person Guy
    Stories by Tira-chan
    Stories by TooManySecrets
    Stories by TSED
    Stories by waterpenguin43
    Stories by Water-Smurf
    In the Arms of MorpheusIcelusCurse of PhobetorTragedy of HypnosPasithea's MessengerBridge Across the StarsIn Vino VeritasClaude Os, Aperi Oculos!Quos Amor Verus Tenuit, TenebitActa Non VerbaPawns of the GodsDumped on the Rooster
    Stories by Weimann
    Stories by WhereamI?
    Stories by Xesirin
    Stories by Yiuel
    Stories by yubel
    Stories by Zanaril
    Stories by Zen_Heart
    Stories by Ziren
    Stories by Zolkabro
    Last edited by Lira; 2010-02-06 at 10:32 AM.
    Credits to half-halfling for my adorable avatar.

    ...............................................

    Come visit the Discussion Thread Index II.
    Looking for a new webcomic to read? Take a look at the Webcomic List.

  3. - Top - End - #3
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Lira's Avatar

    Join Date
    May 2007

    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    Crack Pairings Art Compilation
    A compilation of the art made specifically for the Crack Pairings Thread.

    Art by BatRobin
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    Tiasal (version one).


    Tiasal (version two).


    Art by Belkster11
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    Sangwaan and Hinjo.


    Art by CoffeeIncluded
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    Inkyrius, Vaarsuvius and their children.


    CoffeeIncluded and Haley.


    CoffeeIncluded and Haley.


    Art by Delorges
    Spoiler
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    Vaarsuvius and Redcloak.


    Miko and O-Chul.


    Art by Discord
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    Vaarsuvius and Miko.


    Tsukiko and Vaarsuvius.


    Vaarsuvius and Tsukiko.


    Lirian and Aarindarius.


    Haerta and Vaarsuvius.


    Vaarsuvius, Tsukiko, and their child.


    Miko and Vaarsuvius.


    Haley and Vaarsuvius.


    Roy and Elan.


    Aarindarius and Lirian.


    Haley and Celia.


    Art by Expeditious
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    Vaarsuvius and Blackwing.


    Vaarsuvius.


    Art by Funky Goose
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    A comic version of Water-Smurf's Vaarsuvius/Redcloak story.


    Half-dragon child of Belkar.


    Young Roy and the Little Psion that Could.


    Art by half-halfling
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    Vaarsuvius and V's personifications of femininity and masculinity.


    Vaarsuvius, Inkyrius, their children and the soul splice.


    Tsukiko and Jirix.


    Haley and Vaarsuvius.


    MiTD and Tsukiko.


    Child of Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


    Inkyrius and Vaarsuvius.


    Vaarsuvius' Parent and young Vaarsuvius.


    Inkyrius and Vaarsuvius.


    Vaarsuvius and Redcloak.


    Tiasal and Terentius.


    Jirix, Tsukiko, Redcloak, Celia, Belkar, Roy, Haley, Vaarsuvius, Inkyrius and their children, wishing Kaytara a happy birthday.


    Tiasal, Tsukiko, and Xykon.


    Plushie Dragon Vaarsuvius.


    Aarindarius, Vaarsuvius, Inkyrius and their children.


    Aarindarius.


    Roy and Miko.


    Therkla and Miko.


    Elan, Roy, and Miko.


    A scene from Water-Smurf's fanfic, featuring Haley, Roy, Elan, and a mysterious creature.


    Aarindarius and Inkyrius.


    Art by Kaytara
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    Vaarsuvius.


    Vaarsuvius and Redcloak.


    Vaarsuvius.


    Vaarsuvius and Roy.


    Vaarsuvius and Roy (coloured version).


    Young Vaarsuvius.


    Spliced Inkyrius.


    Vaarsuvius and Miko.


    Vaarsuvius and Miko (coloured version).


    Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


    Mr. Scruffy, Belkar, Vaarsuvius, and Blackwing.


    Aarindarius.


    Aarindarius.


    Aarindarius (coloured version).


    Redcloak, Vaarsuvius, and their child.


    Redcloak, Vaarsuvius, and their child (coloured version).


    Right-Eye and Redcloak.


    Tiasal, Xykon, and Tsukiko.


    Tiasal.


    Art by Kirby
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    Haley and Vaarsuvius.


    Spliced Elan.


    Art by Meg
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    Vaarsuvius and Redcloak.


    Belkar.


    Vaarsuvius and Redcloak.


    Vaarsuvius and Roy.


    Xykon and Redcloak.


    Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


    Tsukiko and Redcloak.


    Tsukiko and Redcloak (coloured version).


    Spliced Inkyrius.


    Vaarsuvius.


    Child of Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


    Child of Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


    Celia and Vaarsuvius.


    Redcloak and Xykon.


    Haley and Roy.


    Art by MReav
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    O-Chul and female members of the Sapphire Guard and Azurite soldiers.


    Art by The Neoclassic
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    Lien and the Yellow-Eyed Fiend.


    Evil Lien.


    Art by Ninjamuffin
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    Elan and Nale.


    Art by Oooohaloophole
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    Tiasal as an infernal scion.


    The Dark One and a goblin god (?).


    Tiasal.


    Tiasal.


    Tiasal.


    Tiasal.


    Tiasal.


    Art by Saeyan
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    Vaarsuvius with a Miko doll.


    Vaarsuvius with a Miko doll.


    Aarindarius and Inkyrius.


    Zz'dtri and Vaarsuvius.


    Inkyrius.


    Aarindarius, Inkyrius, and Vaarsuvius.


    A wanted sign for Zanaril.


    A wanted sign for Zanaril (version 2).


    Vaarsuvius.


    Inkyrius and Aarindarius, with Vaarsuvius and Zz'dtri in chibi form.


    Aarindarius, Inkyrius, and Vaarsuvius.


    Inkyrius, Vaarsuvius, and Aarindarius.


    Inkyrius and Vaarsuvius.


    Aarindarius and Vaarsuvius.


    Vaarsuvius.


    Child of Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


    Vaarsuvius.


    Vaarsuvius and V&RC's child.


    Tiasal.


    Vaarsuvius.


    Tsukiko.


    Scenario for Water-Smurf, featuring Tiasal and Redcloak.


    Vaarsuvius and Aarindarius.


    Vaarsuvius and Inkyrius.


    Vaarsuvius and Inkyrius.


    Aarindarius and Vaarsuvius.


    Vaarsuvius and Inkyrius.


    Aarindarius and Vaarsuvius.


    Zz'dtri and Vaarsuvius.


    Art by Tira-chan
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    Spock and Vaarsuvius.


    Art by TooManySecrets
    Spoiler
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    Female living Xykon.


    Art by Trixie
    Spoiler
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    Celia and Belkar.


    Xykon, Tsukiko, and Miko.


    Art by Yiuel
    Spoiler
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    "The OOTS Jr."



    OOTS Jr.


    OOTS Jr.


    OOTS Jr.


    OOTS Jr.


    Joan.


    Tiasal.


    Alex.


    Art by Zanaril
    Spoiler
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    Undead Vaarsuvius and Xykon.


    Miko and Vaarsuvius.


    Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


    Xykon.


    Spliced Inkyrius.


    Spliced Inkyrius.


    Spliced Inkyrius and Vaarsuvius.


    Young Vaarsuvius.


    Tiasal.


    Argent and Windstriker.


    Aarindarius and Vaarsuvius.


    Child of Closak and the ABD.


    Haley and Vaarsuvius.


    Vaarsuvius, Redcloak, and Tiasal.


    Xykon and Tsukiko.


    Vaarsuvius and Tsukiko.


    Vaarsuvius and Tsukiko (coloured version).


    Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.
    Last edited by Lira; 2010-02-02 at 09:40 PM.
    Credits to half-halfling for my adorable avatar.

    ...............................................

    Come visit the Discussion Thread Index II.
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  4. - Top - End - #4
    Colossus in the Playground
     
    CoffeeIncluded's Avatar

    Join Date
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    New York
    Gender
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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    Wow, I didn't even know you could get to 51 pages.

  5. - Top - End - #5

    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    Quote Originally Posted by CoffeeIncluded View Post
    Wow, I didn't even know you could get to 51 pages.
    Yup. The 50 page maximum isn't software, just policy.
    It's been a bit, GitP. If you're reading this, you're either digging through old stuff, or I've posted for the first time in forever.

    If you want to stay in touch, reach out to me on twitter (same username).

    The best answer is always to ask your DM.
    Unless you're the DM, in which case you should talk to your players.

  6. - Top - End - #6
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Asta Kask's Avatar

    Join Date
    Mar 2009
    Location
    Gothenburg, Sweden
    Gender
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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    Replying to CI's question about Radic/someguyJanineknows:

    When she invited him to drink tea, she did not expect that they would just sit around and... well, imbibe hot beverage. But he didn't get it what she meant, and she was too embarrased to make a more direct proposal along the lines of "Lets have wild sex!"

    A friend had this happen to him. The lady asked him up for tea and he agreed. Then she asked if he would like to sleep over, and he (completely oblivious) said "Yeah, you have a nice sofa, I'll sleep there." And she just looked disappointed (which he completely missed) and went to her bedroom. And a couple of days later he said "d'oh" in quite a loud voice as he suddenly understood what he meant.
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    Yay, new tread! *Dragon marks*


    *Settles in*

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    How long do old threads usually sit around for (after being closed)? Will we have to move old stories to another storage facility sometime or face losing them?
    Avatar by me...yup that's how good my drawing is. As in not very good.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Caleniel View Post
    Taekwondodo - your nick and your avatar are terrific. I want to award you something... how about enough melons to see you through the next ice age?

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    *gets tired of attempting to kill Closak*

    *goes to sleep in the thread and leaves a special glass with nothing in it for Zanaril*

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    Hooray, new thread! *swigs random nearby glass*

    *collapses*

    ...And that is how I met your father.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Asta Kask View Post
    Replying to CI's question about Radic/someguyJanineknows:

    When she invited him to drink tea, she did not expect that they would just sit around and... well, imbibe hot beverage. But he didn't get it what she meant, and she was too embarrased to make a more direct proposal along the lines of "Lets have wild sex!"

    A friend had this happen to him. The lady asked him up for tea and he agreed. Then she asked if he would like to sleep over, and he (completely oblivious) said "Yeah, you have a nice sofa, I'll sleep there." And she just looked disappointed (which he completely missed) and went to her bedroom. And a couple of days later he said "d'oh" in quite a loud voice as he suddenly understood what he meant.
    Ah, thanks.

    Haha, your friend's pretty slow on the uptake, isn't he.

    Before you ask, my math test went well. However, I was rushing and made a stupid error at the very beginning of a LONG problem, and I found it...WHEN I HAD FINISHED THE PROBLEM.

    I had to start that problem all over; nearly ten minutes down the drain.

    This happens to me a LOT, especially on math and physics tests, but pretty much everywhere. I rush, I make stupid mistakes (2+5 instead of 2*5, fill in the wrong bubble on a multiple choice test, use the wrong tense when translating a Latin passage, but mostly using mathematical calculations and formulas) ALL THE TIME on tests, especially when I'm rushing. It's a particularly nasty manifestation of my ADHD and it happens much less frequently when I have more time.

    But because I still manage to get As most of the time (Though not in Physics because I make these mistakes on almost every single problem), no extra time on tests for me.

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    I'm not sure which scares me more: that a thread like this exists in the first place, or that it has come so far.

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    I'd be more worried about the fact that they have the names and probably the material for six more.
    Last edited by Mystic Muse; 2010-01-14 at 03:35 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by CoffeeIncluded View Post
    Ah, thanks.

    Haha, your friend's pretty slow on the uptake, isn't he.
    My friend is a tea fanatic. Once you mention tea to him, all other thoughts disappear from his mind. His peak consumption was 3 gallons tea per day. Yes, gallons. He got this strange pain where his kidneys were...

    And these brain farts happen. I've done something similar - me and a few friends went to see a play and during intermission a pretty redhead comes up to me and asks if I'm at the theatre alone. And I think it's a little strange question but I say no - because I'm there with friends. And midway during the second act I start pounding my head on the seat in front of me because I realize she wasn't asking if I was there alone (without anyone) but whether I was there single (without a girlfriend). The two are closer in Swedish.

    And it doesn't help that women sometimes say things in a very roundabout way. Like saying "Oh, an ice cream stand. Do you want ice cream?" and expecting their boyfriend to understand that this means "I want ice cream."

    The intricacies of indirect speech are very interesting and make life absolute hell for people with autism. "I was wondering if you could take out the garbage?" Why are you informing me about your musings about my physical capabilities?
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    YAY!!! New thread! Party time! *starts dancing*

    Quote Originally Posted by Kyuubi View Post
    *due to being under the effects of love potion starts hitting on Zanaril knowing her profile used to say she was female*
    ...Looks like puting Zanaril's DNA in her own love potions was compleatly worth it.
    Your local Cleric.

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    (yes, that is possible)

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    Quote Originally Posted by Asta Kask View Post
    My friend is a tea fanatic. Once you mention tea to him, all other thoughts disappear from his mind. His peak consumption was 3 gallons tea per day. Yes, gallons. He got this strange pain where his kidneys were...

    And these brain farts happen. I've done something similar - me and a few friends went to see a play and during intermission a pretty redhead comes up to me and asks if I'm at the theatre alone. And I think it's a little strange question but I say no - because I'm there with friends. And midway during the second act I start pounding my head on the seat in front of me because I realize she wasn't asking if I was there alone (without anyone) but whether I was there single (without a girlfriend). The two are closer in Swedish.

    And it doesn't help that women sometimes say things in a very roundabout way. Like saying "Oh, an ice cream stand. Do you want ice cream?" and expecting their boyfriend to understand that this means "I want ice cream."

    The intricacies of indirect speech are very interesting and make life absolute hell for people with autism. "I was wondering if you could take out the garbage?" Why are you informing me about your musings about my physical capabilities?
    Believe me, I know. I've trained myself to become better at indirect speech and secondary meanings and such, but it's still haphazard.

  17. - Top - End - #17
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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    If you want to know more about indirect speech I recommend Stephen Pinker's "The Stuff of Thought", where you will also learn how our verbs reflect the way our minds carve up the world and all the complexities of cursing. Why, when something goes wrong, does our conversation take a sudden turn towards holy things, procreation or defecation?
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    Quote Originally Posted by Asta Kask View Post
    Why, when something goes wrong, does our conversation take a sudden turn towards holy things, procreation or defecation?
    The same reason I have the urge to hit something when I get extremely frustrated.
    Last edited by CoffeeIncluded; 2010-01-14 at 03:48 PM.

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    Quote Originally Posted by Kyuubi View Post
    I'd be more worried about the fact that they have the names and probably the material for six more.
    Eleven more. We have titles for up to thread 17.
    It's been a bit, GitP. If you're reading this, you're either digging through old stuff, or I've posted for the first time in forever.

    If you want to stay in touch, reach out to me on twitter (same username).

    The best answer is always to ask your DM.
    Unless you're the DM, in which case you should talk to your players.

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    We're already on a new thread? I didn't even get a chance to get drunk! :< (And I didn't know that threads could actually go past fifty... I guess we made up for that page we missed in the first thread!)

    But anyway...

    Quote Originally Posted by Taekwondodo View Post
    Water-Smurf: *sighs* No offence to anyone else but this is why I come to this board, for ANY of your stories! Please never stop writing. Not being familier with the characters (apart from what you have written) I can't really comment but they feel right.
    This makes me feel really warm and fuzzy inside. That feels really nice. *snuggles in corner with blanket and prolongs feeling as much as possible*

    Quote Originally Posted by Zanaril View Post
    At least she has a cleric with her.
    Too bad it's one she likes to slap around. I can't help but feel bad for Yutrin--I mean, the one person in the whole world besides him (to his knowledge) hates his guts and beats him up even when he's trying to tend to their wounds.

    I wonder though; if time doesn't flow, do wounds still heal?
    I figure that, as long as the patron god of something is still active, it still exists. So, since Artemis is alive, there is still hunting, but since Cronos is inactive, time has ceased to have meaning, so there is no natural flow anymore. If Hygeia or Asclepius are still around, then healing and health is still possible.

    I have to agree with Taekwondodo, it's hard to judge incharacter-ness at this stage with minor characters, although they seem fine. I like Yutrin for some reason, I think you're doing well to make his sympathetic without being too woobie-ish.
    I'm not quite sure how I managed that--Yutrin seems to have all characteristics of a woobie.

    Wait... how did I manage that?

    BTW, how do you pronounce Yutrin? Is it Yoo-trin or Yuh-trin? Or is the Y pronounced as an 'i'?
    YOO-trin. And the Y is pronounced as a 'y'.

    Oh, and finally *sends some plot-bunnies back to Water-Smurf* If nothing else, they'll keep you company.
    *snuggles with plotbunnies* *they start to multiply* Gah!

    Quote Originally Posted by CoffeeIncluded View Post
    Water-Smurf...So is she pregnant with twins?
    Hestia likes preparing for both possibilities, but just because she mentioned it doesn't mean that she is going to have twins.

    Quote Originally Posted by Thor Person Guy View Post
    @Water-Smurf: I fear for Tiasal's soul. And possibly the continued survival of the sentient races.
    Her soul? Why?

    And when did the continued survival of the sentient races come in?

    (I may be confused as to which chapters you just read...)

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    The April Squickies Award for Best Crack Pairing Story


    Thank you so much to Kaytara for the avatar! It's of Redcloak's and Vaarsuvius's love child.

  21. - Top - End - #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by CoffeeIncluded View Post
    The same reason I have the urge to hit something when I get extremely frustrated.
    But why these things? Why not cooking, or pets, or astronomy? These topics turn up whenever people curse all over the world, suggesting there's some deep key to the human psyche.

    Anyway, this isn't getting more crack pairings done. Water-smurf, what you do is, you take the plot bunnies and cook them. Then you eat them, and get new ideas.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Water-Smurf View Post
    Her soul? Why?
    She does seem to be swimming towards the deep end of the alignment pool. And that's where the nasty kids who dunk people underwater and hold them there all are.

    And when did the continued survival of the sentient races come in?
    If they're going back to the Snarl plan, it kind of puts the whole world back on the line again.

    Quote Originally Posted by Asta Kask View Post
    But why these things? Why not cooking, or pets, or astronomy? These topics turn up whenever people curse all over the world, suggesting there's some deep key to the human psyche.
    I'd guess it's because the things we use to swear with are all topics that be have a strong, deeply ingrained emotional reaction to. When we start yelling at people, we want them to know that we're having an emotional reaction to something; what better way to make everyone emphasise with you than to make them angry too?
    Last edited by Zanaril; 2010-01-14 at 04:22 PM.
    This post may contain sarcasm.
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    BardGirl

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    I promised I'd do a floor plan for a Crack Pairings Club House using what you have kindly told me when I joined you?
    Here are the links:
    http://i607.photobucket.com/albums/t...a/cptca001.jpg
    http://i607.photobucket.com/albums/t...a/cptca002.jpg

    I promise I'll remake them once I find my dungeon designer CD.

    So...

    Please disregard the size notes, they'll be remade. 37.5 m seems too small to me and I'll adjust the thread house and library tower size accordingly then.
    We are "confined" by a large, nice brick wall so that no one can accidently stumble in and blame it on us for not making it visible enough where our area starts. We've got a parking lot and a copter landing place which can double as teleporting space. Next thing is the actual thread house which has five floors (cellar, ground floor, 1-3) and a roof deck. Behind the thread house there's a large storehouse/warehouse where the Brain Bleach is stored. To the right there's a large park in whichs centre the library tower is (which has one floor more than the thread house). The library tower is constructed and interiour fashioned to look like a mage's tower.
    The ground floor of the TH has two large and two small rooms: If you enter through the front door you end up at the reception where you can read new stuff. Two doors lead to the main room. In the middle front there's a large buffet, to the right with window-view at park and library-tower the artist corner where you can work if you don't need absolute silence and to the left there's a large TV with consoles, games and DVDs as well as a sofa group around a low table. The middle of the room is free for spontaneous messing around. The lower right door leads to the bathroom, the lower left door to the stairs. Those are "hidden" and can be accessed through two hidden levers disguised as candleholders which lower the staircase from the ceiling. Down goes to the cellar where the washing machines etc. are and up leads to the first floor.
    The first floor has a large kitchen and several large and small sound-proof rooms equipped for various occassions such as band practice, karaoke and so on.
    Second and Third floor are identical with each 18 rooms along the walls so that everyone's got a window or two in his room. Yes, you've read correctly. These rooms are for personal use such as storing sketches, sleeping, working in silence and brewing potions. In the middle of each floor are two larger bathrooms with bathtub (these aren't on the floor plans because I've forgotten them).
    The roof deck is currently empty.

  24. - Top - End - #24
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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    Are me and Closak allowed to land on the helicopter landing pad? being dragons we're going to need some place to land.

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    Halfling in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    Yes, you are.

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    yay!


    now, where is this treehouse going to be located?

  27. - Top - End - #27
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    BardGirl

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    Grab any tree you like. Only tell me it's general location so I may add it on the chart.

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    So what are we going to call it?

    The Crack Palace?

    I take the biggest bed!

  29. - Top - End - #29
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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    Hm... I can try and import a tree from there... But I doubt that I can get a permanent portal license to the Schwarzwald. Even if we have a tree house there.... :/

    Say, you from Germany? That'd make us three if I correctly remember...


    EDIT: Huh, where did the post go that I was responding to?
    Last edited by Eztheria; 2010-01-14 at 04:35 PM.

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings VI - We've Finally Stooped to Shipping Ourselves

    Can I suggest replacing one of the Supplemental Plot devices with "Narrated by someone".

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