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  1. - Top - End - #91
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Reinboom's Avatar

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    BoVD:
    Living Forbidden Speech: Can't speak about that... or that... or that...
    Living Touch of Juibilex: Everything is like me [the ooze]!
    Living Consume Likeness: Kills you, then is you, repeat.
    Living Polymorph/Lahm's Finger Darts: It fires fingers at you, over, and over, and over..
    Living Addiction: What are you addicted to today?
    Living Black Bag: Torture bags everywhere!
    Living Cheat: An ooze that never loses
    Living Nether Trail: And endless line of evil outsiders follows this ooze.
    Living Tongue Serpents: Hordes of vipers!
    Living Phantasmal Thief: This ooze wants it all.
    Avatar by Alarra

  2. - Top - End - #92
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Black Mage's Avatar

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Vortex of Teeth....it eats you.
    Living Cometfall....every time it hits you, a comet hits you on the head. That'd get annoying fast.
    Member of the Belkar Fanclub


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    Quote Originally Posted by TimeWizard View Post
    Jade Phoenix Mages have the coolest capstone ability ever. They explode. Low on health? explode. Surrounded? expolde. Outsiders? explode. Explode? explode. Come back a few rounds later with all your hp.
    Avatar by: Rex Idiotarum


    R.I.P. Gary Gygax

  3. - Top - End - #93
    Titan in the Playground
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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Aspect of the Wolf: It's an ooze. Shaped like a wolf.

    I have to say, though, the scariest one I've seen so far is a Living Avascular Mass/Finger of Death/Unnaming. *SLAM* Save or turn into a gooey mass of cardial tissue and lose half your HP. Then, save or die. If you make that, save or no longer exist.

  4. - Top - End - #94
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    DwarfFighterGuy

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    Shire of Glaedenfeld

    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Quote Originally Posted by I_Got_This_Name View Post
    A template from Eberron. Short form: imput one or more spells, get an ooze that uses the spell whenever it hits anything.
    Also available in the MM3, I believe.
    "To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women!" -- Conan, on what is best in life

    "A good plan, executed violently now, is better than a perfect plan next week." -- George S. Patton, Jr.

  5. - Top - End - #95
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    Mewtarthio's Avatar

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Well, so long as we're doing blatantly illegal spells:

    Living Mind Seed

    Actually, given that psionics is too good for magical names, it'd probably be something like "Incarnate Mind Seed" or "True Manifestation of Mind Seed" or "Astral Mind Seed Crystal" or what have you, but still: A giant... thing which replaces your mind with its own? Come on, you know you want it...
    Quote Originally Posted by Winterwind View Post
    Mewtarthio, you have scared my brain into hiding, a trembling, broken shadow of a thing, cowering somewhere in the soothing darkness and singing nursery rhymes in the hope of obscuring the Lovecraftian facts you so boldly brought into daylight.

  6. - Top - End - #96
    Titan in the Playground
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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Quote Originally Posted by Mewtarthio View Post
    Well, so long as we're doing blatantly illegal spells:

    Living Mind Seed

    Actually, given that psionics is too good for magical names, it'd probably be something like "Incarnate Mind Seed" or "True Manifestation of Mind Seed" or "Astral Mind Seed Crystal" or what have you, but still: A giant... thing which replaces your mind with its own? Come on, you know you want it...
    Terror. TERROR.

  7. - Top - End - #97
    Firbolg in the Playground
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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Dimensional lock paired with Maze.
    My Current Works


    Quote Originally Posted by Serpentine View Post
    Also I'm pretty sure you're GLaDoS now.

  8. - Top - End - #98
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Foeofthelance's Avatar

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Summon Greater Dragon - "Look guy's there's nothing to worry about, its just an ooze!"
    Basilisk 6
    Pilot of the Thing

    I'm not evil. My morals just aren't the same as society's.

    On a one man quest to beat the Star Wars Universe, using nothing but simple, plain, ordinary logic. Score so far: Me 593 SWU 450


  9. - Top - End - #99
    Orc in the Playground
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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Continual Flame: A rogue's worst nightmare.
    Living Reverse Gravity: Fun for the whole family.

  10. - Top - End - #100
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Black Mage's Avatar

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Polymorph Any Object: *Whack* You're a monkey! *Whack* You're a shrew! *Whack* You're a naked mole rat!
    Member of the Belkar Fanclub


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    Quote Originally Posted by TimeWizard View Post
    Jade Phoenix Mages have the coolest capstone ability ever. They explode. Low on health? explode. Surrounded? expolde. Outsiders? explode. Explode? explode. Come back a few rounds later with all your hp.
    Avatar by: Rex Idiotarum


    R.I.P. Gary Gygax

  11. - Top - End - #101
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Flumph

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Backbiter: It don't hurt you much but I wouldn't attack it

  12. - Top - End - #102
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Wall of Iron: Either the most unfortunate "ooze" ever or the toughest blob on the block. Make sure your druid has plenty of rusting grasp spells prepped.

  13. - Top - End - #103
    Titan in the Playground
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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Quote Originally Posted by Black Mage View Post
    Living Polymorph Any Object: *Whack* You're a monkey! *Whack* You're a shrew! *Whack* You're a naked mole rat!
    Victory for Black Mage!

  14. - Top - End - #104
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Black Mage's Avatar

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Quote Originally Posted by Fax_Celestis View Post
    Victory for Black Mage!
    Thank you, thank you very much. I'm honored *Bows*

    *Gets whacked by the Living Polymorph Any Object* *turns into a hamster*
    Member of the Belkar Fanclub


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    Quote Originally Posted by TimeWizard View Post
    Jade Phoenix Mages have the coolest capstone ability ever. They explode. Low on health? explode. Surrounded? expolde. Outsiders? explode. Explode? explode. Come back a few rounds later with all your hp.
    Avatar by: Rex Idiotarum


    R.I.P. Gary Gygax

  15. - Top - End - #105
    Bugbear in the Playground
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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Augury: *slam* "Weal!" *slam* "Weal!" *slam* "Woe!" *slam* "Weal!"
    Living Contact Other Plane: *slam* "STOP CALLING ME!"
    Diamond Mind avatar provided by Abardam.

  16. - Top - End - #106
    Halfling in the Playground
     
    Autarch's Avatar

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Teleportation Circle-
    Where did it go? Nobody knows.

    Living Animate Objects-
    When it hits you, your clothing comes to life and tries to kill you.

    Living Simulacrum- I don't even know how that would work, but no matter what, it wouldn't be pretty.

    If you play Guild Wars, click this picture.

  17. - Top - End - #107
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Clone for fast easy extra body manufacture.

    Living Insanity because it would look like something straight out of H.P. Lovecraft's drug-induced hallucinations. Coincidentally Living Weird looks like something out of Lovecraft's nightmares (possibly zombie cthulhu?). Heck combine the two and you have Mythos Incarnate. Make a will save or start gibbering incoherently about non-euclidian squid monsters who eat seven-foot chitinous cyclopean tripedal pinecones.

  18. - Top - End - #108
    Troll in the Playground
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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Quote Originally Posted by Nahal View Post
    Living Insanity because it would look like something straight out of H.P. Lovecraft's drug-induced hallucinations. Coincidentally Living Weird looks like something out of Lovecraft's nightmares (possibly zombie cthulhu?). Heck combine the two and you have Mythos Incarnate. Make a will save or start gibbering incoherently about non-euclidian squid monsters who eat seven-foot chitinous cyclopean tripedal pinecones.
    I'm using this. Thank you.
    My Deviantart, Please enjoy it.
    Invincible Maiden Avatar by GryffonDurime.

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    Homebrew by Krimm Blackleaf


  19. - Top - End - #109
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Viscount Einstrauss's Avatar

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Otto's Irresistable Dance. It's annoying enough when a single mage hits you with it once. Every single round?!
    Do not meddle in the affairs of adventurers, for you are expendable and full of EXP.


    Overblown fantasy action/adventure/comedy/drama/spoof. Updates M/W/F

  20. - Top - End - #110
    Troll in the Playground
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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Quote Originally Posted by pink View Post
    The guy behind the shrub in Vermillion city of pokemon red/blue. Give me cookie.
    Wrong. Veridian city. Give ME a cookie.

  21. - Top - End - #111
    Ettin in the Playground
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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    While we're doing psionics...

    Living Time Regression. The best part here is that the only person in a time regression who remembers that things have changed is the manifester. The ooze is too stupid to act on this knowledge. So, everything happens exactly as before... It slam attacks someone. Time regresses a round. It slam attacks them again. Repeat forever.
    Last edited by Aquillion; 2007-04-19 at 02:53 AM.

  22. - Top - End - #112
    Orc in the Playground
     
    PirateCaptain

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Quote Originally Posted by Inyssius Tor View Post
    Living Contact Other Plane: *slam* "STOP CALLING ME!"
    I think you just invented call-centers

    Ye gods!
    Quote Originally Posted by Demented View Post
    "Deploy the HADs!"
    "The HADs, sir?"
    "Halflings with Antipersonnel Disorder."

    Proud member of the Roy Fanclub!


  23. - Top - End - #113
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    PaladinGuy

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Quote Originally Posted by Shalist View Post
    Living wish: Whatever you were (un)fortunate enough to be thinking about becomes reality ("Another living spell? man, I almost wish I were fighting a tarrasque or something, just for the change of pac--ooooohhh sh--"...)
    *BOOM*
    "What did you think of?"
    *BOOM*
    "...the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man..."
    *BOOM*
    "God help us..."
    "The problem with defending the purity of the English language is that English is about as pure as a cribhouse whore. We don't just borrow words ... English has pursued other languages down alleyways to beat them unconscious and rifle their pockets for new vocabulary."

    "The only thing necessary for evil to succeed is for good men to do nothing."

  24. - Top - End - #114
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    OldWizardGuy

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Originally Posted by Krimm_Blackleaf:
    I'm using this. Thank you.
    Sure, so long as you stat out said pinecones.
    Last edited by Nahal; 2007-04-19 at 11:58 AM.

  25. - Top - End - #115
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Telonius's Avatar

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Detect Magic. Is completely sure of its own existence, sparking a philosophical revolution among living spells.

  26. - Top - End - #116
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Black Mage's Avatar

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Plane Shift: *Whack* Oh...uh...hi Asmodeus!
    Member of the Belkar Fanclub


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    Quote Originally Posted by TimeWizard View Post
    Jade Phoenix Mages have the coolest capstone ability ever. They explode. Low on health? explode. Surrounded? expolde. Outsiders? explode. Explode? explode. Come back a few rounds later with all your hp.
    Avatar by: Rex Idiotarum


    R.I.P. Gary Gygax

  27. - Top - End - #117
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    BarbarianGuy

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Quote Originally Posted by Aquillion View Post
    While we're doing psionics...

    Living Time Regression. The best part here is that the only person in a time regression who remembers that things have changed is the manifester. The ooze is too stupid to act on this knowledge. So, everything happens exactly as before... It slam attacks someone. Time regresses a round. It slam attacks them again. Repeat forever.
    That would just be wrong. Instant end of a campaign. Funnier than " Rocks Fall, everyone dies" though.
    As the Troll Masterchef was wont to sing : "There's no Race like Gnome for the Hollendaise".

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    DM of the Arena: " Gareth goes to swing his Great Axe over his head. Gareth ( roll, roll) trips over his big toe and spins in mid air, landing flat on his back. The Great Axe returns and lands blade first in the center of his chest, causing 21 damage."



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    NG Halfling Sorcerer (6th )


    Ability Scores:
    Strength- 11
    Dexterity- 15
    Constitution- 14
    Intelligence- 14
    Wisdom- 13
    Charisma- 15

  28. - Top - End - #118
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    Emperor Tippy's Avatar

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Quote Originally Posted by Hypothetical View Post
    That would just be wrong. Instant end of a campaign. Funnier than " Rocks Fall, everyone dies" though.
    Actually the party would win every fight. The Living Spell woudl never win.

    Everytime it hits the round is redone. So 1 in 20 redone rounds the LS rolls a natural 1 and misses. Even if the party can only hit it on a natural 20 and only does 1 damage on a critical, they would still win. Every 8000 rounds the Living Spell on average would take 1 point of damage.

    And the best part is the only rounds that the characters remember are ones when they rolled 2 natural 20's and their enemy rolled a natural 1.

  29. - Top - End - #119
    Pixie in the Playground
     
    BardGuy

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Except the one hit, right? Then much better if the rest of the party is watching the battle at a distance.

    So, for one person, they've been locked in a month-long battle with this slime constantly being hit, but not hurt for long. To the others - it never touched you, but you kept hiting it in the best possible location.

  30. - Top - End - #120
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    knightsaline's Avatar

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    Default Re: 1001 Funny Living spells

    Living Vengeful Gaze of God/Contingent True Resurrection: Kills you, kills itself, True rezzes itself, kills again, kills itself again, true rezzes itself again..........
    Quote Originally Posted by knightsaline View Post
    Living Vengeful Gaze of God/Contingent True Resurrection: Kills you, kills itself, True rezzes itself, kills again, kills itself again, true rezzes itself again..........
    "On the other hand, maybe all of this could have been prevented if you had just managed to get laid once in a while. You can't tell me you would have been as tightly wound if you had been getting treasure type O once in a while"

    Roxas avatar made by Adghar. The keyblades are Diamond dust and One Winged Angel

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