LGBTAitp 29: the Rainbow Outreach Program

[The Succubus]

Huh, I guess this news didn't turn out to be as good as I had initally thought. Oh, well. It's at least neutral news, possibly good-ish. Right?


~Phoenix~

I have no strong feelings one way or the other about neutral news.

[Lentrax]

Well, I checked out thte local GLBT Center in Denver yesterday. It's a pretty neat place.

I just had a couple issues with it. Firstly, they've apparently got a youth hangout spot downstairs, but it's only for people 21 and under. So while that seems to be the exact kind of place I'd like to check out, I'm too old by three years. Of course, they might be more lenient about that, but I didn't really ask >_< . The other bit is that all their trans stuff happens on Thursdays, which conflicts with my kung fu practice that I started up again last week.

Huh, I guess this news didn't turn out to be as good as I had initally thought. Oh, well. It's at least neutral news, possibly good-ish. Right?


~Phoenix~

Well, you could always try to impress them with some kung fu.

Or by demonstaring your kung fu prowess on anyone telling you to leave.

Just don't do anything that would land you in jail. You're far too pretty for that.

[Socratov]

Well, I checked out thte local GLBT Center in Denver yesterday. It's a pretty neat place.

I just had a couple issues with it. Firstly, they've apparently got a youth hangout spot downstairs, but it's only for people 21 and under. So while that seems to be the exact kind of place I'd like to check out, I'm too old by three years. Of course, they might be more lenient about that, but I didn't really ask >_< . The other bit is that all their trans stuff happens on Thursdays, which conflicts with my kung fu practice that I started up again last week.

Huh, I guess this news didn't turn out to be as good as I had initally thought. Oh, well. It's at least neutral news, possibly good-ish. Right?


~Phoenix~

So... Ask! I mean it's not the most scary thing you've done (with coming out and actually transitioning and all that*) so... um... yeah... go for it!

*and by this I mean you are very courageous.

[Absol197]

Well, you could always try to impress them with some kung fu.

Or by demonstaring your kung fu prowess on anyone telling you to leave.

Just don't do anything that would land you in jail. You're far too pretty for that.

Wait, how would you know?
Also, I'm really not >_< .

~Phoenix~

[Lentrax]

Guessing? Or maybe my genuine opinion that everyone is pretty.

Or at least could be if they were better people on the inside as well....

Little known fact: There is no such thing as a pretty bigot.

Honestly, you would have to be a really bad person to get me to think you aren't beautiful...*

*Please note this statement is said with noone in mind, just a generalization.

[Faulty]

That is both curious and incredibly sad to hear. ;_;

I imagine that it's because it's easier to objectify a woman if she has a vagina. Less threatening than a penis. Penetration being feminizing and all that.

[Astrella]

Sympathies to Keveak and Siuis.

Re: Fighting games. Uhm, there's Scarlet Weather Rhapsody which is a Touhou fighting game, so it doesn't really fall into the usual tropes. :P I don't think it's been localized though?

-----

Remember the crossdressing thing at the university of Brussels I talked about a while back? A sociologist at my uni wrote a nice public letter calling people to attention about trans* discrimination as well in this regard.

Well, I checked out thte local GLBT Center in Denver yesterday. It's a pretty neat place.

I just had a couple issues with it. Firstly, they've apparently got a youth hangout spot downstairs, but it's only for people 21 and under. So while that seems to be the exact kind of place I'd like to check out, I'm too old by three years. Of course, they might be more lenient about that, but I didn't really ask >_< . The other bit is that all their trans stuff happens on Thursdays, which conflicts with my kung fu practice that I started up again last week.

Huh, I guess this news didn't turn out to be as good as I had initally thought. Oh, well. It's at least neutral news, possibly good-ish. Right?


~Phoenix~

You should ask, they probably don't mind too much. My trans youth group at least is pretty lenient about age. I'm sorry to hear that the trans* group conflicts with your lessons though.

[Lix Lorn]

That is both curious and incredibly sad to hear. ;_;

...honestly, I feel that you're looking at this from the wrong direction.
I'm still on 'Holy god there was a trans character in a game from like before 2000'.

[Absol197]

So... Ask! I mean it's not the most scary thing you've done (with coming out and actually transitioning and all that*) so... um... yeah... go for it!

*and by this I mean you are very courageous.

I don't really think courageous is the best way to describe it. I'm actually a fairly timid person. I liken everything else to being half a mile underwater: the pressure feels like it's going to kill you, so you swim up as fast as you can so you don't pop...
And then you get the bends afterwards D: !

Remember the crossdressing thing at the university of Brussels I talked about a while back? A sociologist at my uni wrote a nice public letter calling people to attention about trans* discrimination as well in this regard.

Hurray! That's always good news. The other part, though, is how many people pay attention to the article...

You should ask, they probably don't mind too much. My trans youth group at least is pretty lenient about age. I'm sorry to hear that the trans* group conflicts with your lessons though.

I should have asked, but I was feeling awkward. I really shouldn't have, 'cause I know no one there would judge, but I couldn't really help it. I always feel awkward when entering a new social environment. After I get used to it and get to know the way things work there I open up a lot, but in the beginning it's tough.

I'll try to find a time to go back and explore a little more.


~Phoenix~

[Lycunadari]

So in other news I had an unexpected conversation with my daughter's mother - turns out she has a trans friend so I didn't have to explain stuff to her. She's obviously concerned of how little person will take the news too, but is generally very supportive

That's great!

*hugs back*

Spoiler

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Unlike most people who don't like the festive season, I'm not concerned about family reunions and such. In fact, it's been a couple years I spend the crucial evenings with friends instead, and I have a pretty good time there. The only difference between friends and family, actually, is that the former is like a party that happens to take place during holidays, and the latter consists of my mother organizing something resembling (but not being quite) a Christmas evening.
I don't like Christmas because of Christmas itself. My father died the day after Christmas and people do not give a [REDACTED] about it because it's the holidays, and unfortunate events such as this one just make it awkward, especially when they've already reached their quota of generosity. It's a terrible, shallow holiday. I don't even want or expect gifts, I just want people to leave me the hell alone when I want to and not even dare thinking about instilling me with the holiday spirit. These people don't actually care that much about helping others, especially once the mandatory day is past (and during that day, god forbid you don't look happy enough, because just who is unhappy on Christmas?!). Remember the 2004 tsunami? Though [REDACTED], happened right after Christmas too, and we only remember it when yet another movie comes out, narrating the pain and suffering of the white tourists who survived it. And heck, it's not just the others, I'm selfish, the difference is that I'm not being hypocritical about it.
There's a lot I could say on this subject, but this is not the time or place for this. If you know Dino Buzzati, he wrote a short story on Christmas that expresses perfectly how it makes me feel. In fact, he wrote a bunch of stories I can relate to, and I suggest you guys take a look.

[sarcasm]Not that a Jew who doesn't celebrate Christmas is that unusual anyway, even if they're not religious. What's stranger is that I'm not planning to eat Chinese.[/sarcasm]

So yeah, I'm a grumpy one. I respect everyone's right to like and celebrate Christmas, but if anyone pushes it on me, or worse, tell me to cheer up, I swear someone's going to regret it, and it's not gonna be me.

EDIT: I realize I might come up as really aggressive here and it's not my intention, so let me correct it.
Kender, I'm glad you're looking forward to it, and I wish you a great amount of fun! That's valid for everyone else who's looking toward Christmas, of course.

*hugs and cookies*

Ugh...I've been having a pretty lousy morning.

Spoiler

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A lot of the links that have been going around have been getting me thinking. It actually started with that Matrix-Patriarchy comic, and then when I read Natalie's blog about the biggest trans myths (exact names escape me at the moment), it all sort of came together.

I used to be really wrapped up in that way of thinking, and it almost...If it hadn't been for this thread, and constantly seeing it popping up on the forum and getting curious, something really bad might have happened in my future.

I used to believe in the whole, "You're really a man," thing. Even though I wanted to be a woman so bad it hurt sometimes, I couldn't think of it any other way than biology. The first time I looked up SRS (when I was 13 or so), I remember I was disappointed that it couldn't allow you to get pregnant afterwards, and I decided it "wasn't real." When a physics teacher I had in college a few years ago began a class trying to be as inclusive as possible, and said he would call people by the pronoun of their choice, I can remember thinking that it was stupid, because even though I wanted to be a girl, "I [was a] boy, so I have to be called he." The onyl way for me to get what I wanted and for it to be real was a supernatural transformation, which was of course impossible, so I sank deeper and deeper into fantasizing about how that could be possible, to the exclusion of living my life. I'm surprised I actually graduated from school, my grades slipped so much in my last couple years...

I just can't stop thinking about how freaking close I came to missing out on something that has made me happier than I've ever been (yes, I'm aware of the irony about saying I'm happy when I'm complaiing about being depressed-ish). It's quite possible that you guys all saved me. I can never thank you enough for that!

Sorry for the depressing rant (spoilered for those who don't care to read it), but it's been hanging over my thoughts recently, and I needed to get it out.

You're all the greatestest . I'm going to go work on our Werewolf game in order to think about something else, now...


~Phoenix~
And Lena, even though it's been your links that led to thins, don't feel bad, please. I enjoy reading the things you link, because they help me understand better. It'll pass, and I'll be better off for it :) .
EDIT: And wow, I did it again! I got post #197 (my previous post, not this one)! I don't plan it that way, I swear it just happens >_< !

*cookies and hugs* Hope you feel better soon! And, it seems like 197 is your magic number. Is your birthday on 15th July?

I should have asked, but I was feeling awkward. I really shouldn't have, 'cause I know no one there would judge, but I couldn't really help it. I always feel awkward when entering a new social environment. After I get used to it and get to know the way things work there I open up a lot, but in the beginning it's tough.

I'll try to find a time to go back and explore a little more.


~Phoenix~

*hugs* I know that awkardness, too. I'm sometimes so shy that I'm literally unable to speak if I'm not directly adressed. Makes it very hard to get to know people. *sigh*
But I'm sure you'll have a great time there once you get to know these people better.

[PairO'Dice Lost]

So... On a more positive note, well...

Hmmm. I don't seem to have one.

Anyone have some good news to share?

I do, sort of. My boyfriend has been in Australia since August for study abroad, he's coming back in a week and will be spending Christmas and New Year's with my family, and then a week after that it's our one-year anniversary. Aside from the potential for awkwardness from the folks, I'm really looking forward to the next month and a half.

[Lentrax]

That's definitely a positive. So happy you get to spend time with your BF.

[the_druid_droid]

That, at least, seems to be only partially true with King of Fighters. Being one of the games I had unopened, I tried it. It has some really big males, but there is quite the variety in size and muscle-mass. In fact, half the cover is dedicated to this person, whom I find seriously adorable. X3

Reading over this, I think I quoted the wrong thing, but I was going to say that while watching/playing with my friends through Blaz Blue, I was more interested in Noel as a character than her fanservice (though she does get some). Admittedly, it's only one data point, but I think they did an ok job of adding some dimensionality to the game beyond "scarcely clothed people beat on each other".

Blarg. Feelin' low this last week. Unrelated, but blah.

Sorry to hear it

Also posted in Relationships thread but somewhat related to this too plus now I'm worrying too so yeah.

While the relationship stuff may be a factor in all this, it sounds like both of these individuals (particularly the one with tendencies to self-harm) could benefit from counseling. I know it isn't easy to get folks to listen when you bring up that subject, but I would encourage you to steer them in that direction, if possible.

I have no strong feelings one way or the other about neutral news.

What makes a man turn neutral? Is it money? Power? Women? Or is he just born with a heart full of neutrality?

I should have asked, but I was feeling awkward. I really shouldn't have, 'cause I know no one there would judge, but I couldn't really help it. I always feel awkward when entering a new social environment. After I get used to it and get to know the way things work there I open up a lot, but in the beginning it's tough.

I'll try to find a time to go back and explore a little more.


~Phoenix~

If it makes you feel better, I think this is actually pretty common. I know I tend to be relatively social once I get to know people, but without a friend or acquaintance around as a social catalyst, it takes me a while to get over the initial hump of interacting with others.

[KenderWizard]

Totally did not see that ending coming

I KNOW RIGHT?! Mind = blown!

*Hugs* Musashi and Kender*

I appreciate that. I like christmas, but I hate the time of year too.

*more hugs* I can understand that.

Also posted in Relationships thread but somewhat related to this too plus now I'm worrying too so yeah.

Bleh, that's a really sucky situation. I have been that lovesick person who wanted to confess love to a heterosexual same-sex friend. I didn't.

[Mina Kobold]

So... On a more positive note, well...

Hmmm. I don't seem to have one.

Anyone have some good news to share?

Uhm, I will soon be doing a pretty fun project that is making me super-nervous?

...

I am not good at having good news. ^_^'

I imagine that it's because it's easier to objectify a woman if she has a vagina. Less threatening than a penis. Penetration being feminizing and all that.

Eep, that sounds like a really scary mindset. ._.

*shudder*

...honestly, I feel that you're looking at this from the wrong direction.
I'm still on 'Holy god there was a trans character in a game from like before 2000'.

I know, but I really want them to be further ahead than this. It is amazing that they even had a trans character in the eighties, but that they still cannot make Poison just be trans is just sad. It is the 2010s, we should have gotten better by now. ;_;

Also, apparently Poison is originally from Final Fight, alongside similar character, Roxy. Was the first trans characters to appear in video games, so yay for firsts! ^_^

[noparlpf]

Look what I found.

[Mina Kobold]

Look what I found.

It does not appear to be a parody...

*A really-really-scary-thing has been detected and Brains has been shot down to prevent panicking the Kobold.

The problem seems to be caused by the File HAM_Look_What_I_Found

If this is the first time you've seen this fear error screen, shut down Kobold*

X_X

[noparlpf]

It does not appear to be a parody...

*A really-really-scary-thing has been detected and Brains has been shot down to prevent panicking the Kobold.

The problem seems to be caused by the File HAM_Look_What_I_Found

If this is the first time you've seen this fear error screen, shut down Kobold*

X_X

Man, this is not my week. Two blue-screens and several freezes for my laptop, and now I've crashed my best kobold.

[Astrella]

Look what I found.

Ugh, I wonder what's sadder, people doing stuff like this without realizing how offense it is or people doing it on purpose. :/

-----

Also I've been breaking my head over what message to send to a friend of mine about me being trans*. Any thoughts / hints?

[noparlpf]

Ugh, I wonder what's sadder, people doing stuff like this without realizing how offense it is or people doing it on purpose. :/

-----

Also I've been breaking my head over what message to send to a friend of mine about me being trans*. Any thoughts / hints?

"'Sup. I'm a woman."
As you may have noticed I do not have much experience with coming out. And coming out as asexual is very different from coming out as trans.
So, what is said friend's stance on transsexuality and whatnot? Can't really give a tailored suggestion without a smidge more info.

[Astrella]

"'Sup. I'm a woman."
As you may have noticed I do not have much experience with coming out. And coming out as asexual is very different from coming out as trans.
So, what is said friend's stance on transsexuality and whatnot? Can't really give a tailored suggestion without a smidge more info.

We've talked about queer rights before, but mostly in the abstract and not about transness. Pretty sure he wouldn't react badly, I'm mostly worried that it'll make stuff awkward between us.

[noparlpf]

We've talked about queer rights before, but mostly in the abstract and not about transness. Pretty sure he wouldn't react badly, I'm mostly worried that it'll make stuff awkward between us.

Try sounding it out a bit first. Like, ask if he knows anybody who's trans.

[The Succubus]

Man, this is not my week. Two blue-screens and several freezes for my laptop, and now I've crashed my best kobold.

If it makes you feel any better, I just laughed my demonic butt off.

[KerfuffleMach2]

So... On a more positive note, well...

Hmmm. I don't seem to have one.

Anyone have some good news to share?

My youngest brother, who is gay, is having an awards ceremony next Tuesday. He's receiving his Eagle Scout award from Boy Scouts. Something that, apparently, only 4% of all Boy Scouts actually get.

So, that's pretty cool for him.

[supernerd]

My youngest brother, who is gay, is having an awards ceremony next Tuesday. He's receiving his Eagle Scout award from Boy Scouts. Something that, apparently, only 4% of all Boy Scouts actually get.

So, that's pretty cool for him.

2% I'll be getting mine by the time I have to start college applications. and it's better because he's gay, as long as being both gay and an eagle doesn't send him into the possible spiraling depression I'm afraid of, due to being an elite in an organization openly opposed to people of "my kind."

[noparlpf]

If it makes you feel any better, I just laughed my demonic butt off.

Great, now I've broken you too.

[PairO'Dice Lost]

My youngest brother, who is gay, is having an awards ceremony next Tuesday. He's receiving his Eagle Scout award from Boy Scouts. Something that, apparently, only 4% of all Boy Scouts actually get.

So, that's pretty cool for him.

Pass along my congratulations, from one Eagle Scout to another.

Is he out to his troop, and if so how did his Board of Review go? I wasn't out to my troop about being gay, but they did know about my (lack of) religious belief, which the BSA also frowns on. Before I went through my Eagle Board my troop leaders said "The BSA's bigoted stance is BS, if they ask you questions about that just get around them without lying, don't let their bigotry prevent you from getting the award you earned," so I didn't have a problem with that, but I have a friend in another troop (also gay and non-religious) whose leaders didn't like it, told the BSA representatives for his Board, and prevented him from making Eagle.

[KenderWizard]

Look what I found.

This is a joke, right? A really awful joke? Please tell me it's a joke?

We've talked about queer rights before, but mostly in the abstract and not about transness. Pretty sure he wouldn't react badly, I'm mostly worried that it'll make stuff awkward between us.

Hmm. Well, I'd be inclined to just go for it. Emphasise that you're still the same person, still his friend, still the Astrella he presumably likes, and that this isn't a change for you, or something that's new, it's something that you're coming to terms with but that has always been there. Like something he happened to not know, but was always there. I'd also make time to do something together that's fun and normal, but gives him a chance to ask questions and talk if he wants to. When I came out to my best friend, and I was worried about similar things, this was how I went about it and we were walking together and chatting, which was normal and pleasant but it also meant we were alone and had time to address her questions.

My youngest brother, who is gay, is having an awards ceremony next Tuesday. He's receiving his Eagle Scout award from Boy Scouts. Something that, apparently, only 4% of all Boy Scouts actually get.

So, that's pretty cool for him.

That's awesome! I thought Boy Scouts had a sort of don't-ask-don't-tell thing going on, though?

[Lix Lorn]

If it makes you feel any better, I just laughed my demonic butt off.

Ooh
(goes to find it)
:3

[monkyman640]

My youngest brother, who is gay, is having an awards ceremony next Tuesday. He's receiving his Eagle Scout award from Boy Scouts. Something that, apparently, only 4% of all Boy Scouts actually get.

So, that's pretty cool for him.

Yeah, I wasn't out to my troop either. And they didn't even ask about my religious beliefs because my troop was based out of a church. Does that make sense?