The Critique Thread

[SamBurke]

No joke, mate.

[Eldan]

Three people weren't on the list yet. Oh calamity. They are now.

[SamBurke]

Hm. Could we have a check-off for when a thread has been PEACH'd? I'd like to make sure they all do, but I don't have unlimited time.

[Amnoriath]

Could any of you fine gentleman please look into balance and some different abilities for a couple of Incarnum PrC fixes I have done in another blog. As such it is for 3.5 play. I am sorry but I lost material on how to do a chart sequence online a long time ago so please bear with the amount of words.
http://www.enworld.org/forum/d-d-leg...rnate-fix.html
http://www.enworld.org/forum/d-d-leg...de-rehaul.html

I just noticed that it shortened up the links so it didn't say what they are. The first is a Necrocarnate fix and the second is an Incarnum Blade fix.

[tallonRook]

Hi, I was wondering if someone could critique my pathfinder class, the Zealot. It's supposed to be a replacement for the Paladin and Antipaladin, and while I don't have that much new material in it I would like to know if what I have added is balanced. Thanks!
Here's the Link: http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showt...7#post13946607

[toapat]

this seemingly died immediately

[TheWombatOfDoom]

Seems like giving something a day to die is a little premature. I haven't had time to critique anything as of yet, as I've been quite busy this week.

[Veklim]

Seems like giving something a day to die is a little premature. I haven't had time to critique anything as of yet, as I've been quite busy this week.

Indeed, I've seen stuff take WEEKS to die properly, even with concerted neglect....

I too have been busy, since my employers seem to forget their worker's need for food, sleep or indeed any form of life outside the job. Luckily I have an afternoon off tomorrow, and then the slight possibility that the entire of Friday doesn't bring a phonecall asking me to work my solitary day off in the week...cross fingers and toes, I may get to PEACH a post or three by then!

In the meantime, I'd suggest all people who signed up to this little venture put a link to this thread in their sig, since I'm sure a lot of people just don't know we're doing this yet...

[Eldan]

I've peached three base classes linked in here now. I'll take on the Wanderer next, probably tomorrow.

[Veklim]

Yes indeed, and thankyou for the Bastion's PEACH btw, it's helped a lot!

[SamBurke]

PEACHed one thus far, plan on doing another one when I don't have to write two full length speeches in a matter of hours.

[Eurus]

It's very unfinished, so I feel a little awkward linking it, but getting attention is phenomenally encouraging to actually finish stuff, so here's the classes I've been working on when I have time. The idea is to replace vancian spellcasting, but my goal isn't "fixing balance" so much as creating a different theme. Some aspects of D&D spellcasting always annoyed or bored me a little, so I wanted to take a crack at making something a little different, with significant ties between fluff and crunch.

So yeah, if anyone feels like looking at the Mage + Sage, that'd be awesome.

[Iamyourking]

I don't suppose I could get anyone to take a look at Sons of the Fallen here? I got a bit of commentary when I first making it, but it has long since dried up despite my continuing work. I'm mostly looking for comments on the mechanical side but I won't turn down story commentary either. Short comments are fine on the Google document but longer ones should be in the thread (In my signature). Some of the statblocks are still in progress, so please take that into account when discussing them in addition to the fact that I've been working on it piecemeal for quite a while and may reformat it to flow better and remove redundencies.

[Kensen]

I'd appreciate any feedback on my RPG, Rogue: Clandestine Operations.

• It's not d20 but mechanically, it bears some similarities to D&D and some other RPGs.
• It's about stealth missions and other secret operations in a medieval setting.
• It's 17 pages long (if read in the PDF format).

The thread is here, and it includes more info and links to the rules reference.

Any kind of comments are welcome, whether about the mechanics, presentation, language or anything else.

Thanks!

[Deepbluediver]

WARNING! WARNING!
DIRE WALL OF TEXT INCOMING!
PEACH-CR 17+! DO NOT ATTEMPT TO PEACH THIS THREAD UNLESS YOU ARE AT LEAST AN ORC IN THE PLAYGROUND!


If any of you wonderful people are in dire need of something to put your PEACHING skills to the test, then I have a challenge for you: My 3.5/3.PF Magic Fix.

Game balance is something that interests me, and most people agree that magic-users have the potential to completely eclipse non-magic users in many situations. Any other magic-fix I saw fell short, mostly because magic is woven so intricatly into so much of D&D nothing "simple" can hit on any problem. I devised what I think is a workable system, and I don't think it's more complicated than other aspects of the game, but it is extensive (i.e. a long read). And that's not even counting spell rewrites.

I've been continually tweeking this after it was posted, but I'm sure there are still some funky sticking points here and there. I would love more feedback, and I'd be happy to PEACH just about anything of yours in exchange.


P.S. The thread has been quite of new posts for some time, even though I've been updating it. If you are worried about getting in trouble for necroing, PM your comments and I'll post them. That way if anyone get's in trouble it will be me.

P.P.S. I'm still working on spell rewrites, slowly. If you have any individual spell(s) you want to see me fix so (particularly any you have personally experienced as unbalanced) let me know.

[SamBurke]

I don't suppose I could get anyone to take a look at Sons of the Fallen here? I got a bit of commentary when I first making it, but it has long since dried up despite my continuing work. I'm mostly looking for comments on the mechanical side but I won't turn down story commentary either. Short comments are fine on the Google document but longer ones should be in the thread (In my signature). Some of the statblocks are still in progress, so please take that into account when discussing them in addition to the fact that I've been working on it piecemeal for quite a while and may reformat it to flow better and remove redundencies.

I shall not only read and critique, but I shall use it in my campaign, as requested. (See sig.) I have a hard enough time finding anything that's powerful enough to run, so this should help.

[Waargh!]

We need to get more organized!

I suggest we keep a table with the requests and how many critiques have reviewed it. I would personally prefer for critiques to prioritize topics that have no (meaningful) reviews yet or on topics where some specific feedback is missed from the current reviews. I believe this was more the intend of this thread.
If more reviews are requested then the requestor can post again specifying the need (i.e. "thanks for the review on balance, would also like comment on feat part or on fluff please")

What do you say?? I can build something up if you think it is worth it and we can put on OP

Btw, a request to view one more Base Class: the Gentleman

[TheWombatOfDoom]

We need to get more organized!

I suggest we keep a table with the requests and how many critiques have reviewed it. I would personally prefer for critiques to prioritize topics that have no (meaningful) reviews yet or on topics where some specific feedback is missed from the current reviews. I believe this was more the intend of this thread.
If more reviews are requested then the requestor can post again specifying the need (i.e. "thanks for the review on balance, would also like comment on feat part or on fluff please")

What do you say?? I can build something up if you think it is worth it and we can put on OP

Btw, a request to view one more Base Class: the Gentleman

I um, put this through earlier. But I agree.

[Waargh!]

I um, put this through earlier. But I agree.

Oh, I am terribly sorry. Indeed I missed that post of yours. Let us see if there is a general agreement

[Veklim]

Seems like a good plan to me, aye.

[TheWombatOfDoom]

Here we go:

Requested Critiques

Grod the Giant - Fighter Fix
Toapat - Paladin Fix
Veklim - The Bastion
Amnoriath - Necrocarnate FixIncarnum Blade
Fawriel - The Wanderer (3.5 Base Class)
God Imperror - Anointed heritor
Eldan - Arcane Magic
Waargh! - The Engineer
WaylanderX - Improviser
Fawriel - Wanderer class
tallonRook - The Zealot
Eurus - The Mage & The Sage
Iamyourking - Sons of the Fallen
Kensen - RPG - Rogue: Clandestine Operations
Deepbluediver - 3.5/3.PF Magic Fix
Waargh - The Gentleman

If you've been PEACHed sufficently, let me know so we/I can take you off. PEACHer's who own the top post of the page, you can use this to put at the top of the latest page. Sound like a plan?

[toapat]

i personally think the previous itteration was better, as it gained more requests faster and fewer post unrelated to asking.

[TheWombatOfDoom]

i personally think the previous itteration was better, as it gained more requests faster and fewer post unrelated to asking.

Well then Eldan can change it to that if he's partial to it. I made the table since that was the feedback I recieved, and something needed to be done about organization. He was actually the second poster in that thread you provided earlier, so if he like that system I assume he'd have implemented it by now. That's just my submission to take or leave. I personally have no problems with messages or posts saying "thank you for the PEACHing, you can take my name off the list now."

[Amnoriath]

Just thought I should keep it alive.

[toapat]

Just thought I should keep it alive.

well, the forums were down for 3 days, and when coming back on knocked out the site a few times

[Amnoriath]

So, are the critiques going to be on the thread or in messages?

[toapat]

So, are the critiques going to be on the thread or in messages?

in topic of the homebrew

[Iamyourking]

Along those lines, since SamBurke is going to be out indefinitely, would somebody substitute for him in providing critiques for Sons of the Fallen?

[Nightgaun7]

1) Pardon my ignorance, but what is PEACHing?

2) Fist of the Coral - loosely Fist of the Forest-based PrC for ocean dwellers
D&D 3.5
Looking for mechanical advice on changes to class features

[toapat]

1) Pardon my ignorance, but what is PEACHing?

2) Fist of the Coral - loosely Fist of the Forest-based PrC for ocean dwellers
D&D 3.5
Looking for mechanical advice on changes to class features

Please Examine And Comment Honestly