Crack Pairings V - We Revel in Infamy

[The Dark Fiddler]

Hello, and welcome to the fifth Crack Pairings thread. If you haven't read the previous ones yet, you can do so here, here, here, and here.

Or, if you don't wish to read through all 200 pages, here's the short version: we have a roller and some tables. You roll a pairing, and maybe a plot device, then you write it, draw it, act it out, interpretive dance it, whatever! Apparently we like this sort of thing.

Please remember to keep it clean, folks! The board rules still apply!

When posting a pairing, please at least try to do something with it. We like it when people try!

New: Sure, we won't be winning any Oscars or anything, but that doesn't mean we can't have our own little awards.

Should you wish to roll a pairing, Sgeo coded up a roller for us. If you want that personal touch, go roll on the tables, or make up your own pairing!

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Zanaril's

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Funky Goose's

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Discord's

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Saeyan

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rangermania

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Trixie

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MReav

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Kaytara

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half-halfling

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Tables!

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Initial Table
Roll 2d6 (or more!) decide which tables to pick the characters from.

1. OotS Table 1
2. OotS Table 2
3. OotS Table 3
4. OotS Table 4
5. Minion List
6. Dead Guy List

Table 1 - By Minion992929

1. Roy
2. Durkon
3. Celia
4. Xykon
5. Tsukiko
6. Vaarsuvius
7. Monster in The Dark
8. Miko
9. Nale
10. Elan
11. Haley
12. Belkar
13. Lord Shojo
14. Redcloak
15. Hinjo
16. Daigo
17. Kazumi
18. Inkyrius
19. Roll again twice
20. Roll again and switch gender

Table 2 - By Minion 992929

1. The Guy with a halberd
2. Sarah Greenhilt
3. Haley's dad
4. Thanh
5. Julio Scoundrél
6. Mr. Rodriguez
7. Horace Greenhilt
8. Therkla
9. Zz'Dtri
10. YokYok
11. Leeky Windstaff
12. The Cliffport chief of police
13. Windstriker
14. Jirix
15. Lien
16. Argent
17. Yor
18. Roll again twice
19. Roll again on twice on Initial Table
20. Roll again and switch gender

Table 3 - By Minion992929

1. Soon Kim (incorporeal)
2. Shadowdancer
3. Hilgya
4. Dorukan
5. Bozzok
6. Crystal
7. Bandit King
8. Ancient Black Dragon
9. O-Chul
10. The Snarl
11. The Eye of Fear and Flame
12. Lord Kubota
13. Thog
14. Julia Greenhilt
15. Belkar
16. The oracle
17. Jephton/Haerta/Ganneron
18. Roll again twice on Initial Table
19. Roll again twice
20. Roll again and switch gender

Table 4 - By Minion 992929

1. The dragon's hoard
2. The chimera
3. The really dangerous trap
4. Roy's Archon
5. The Hydra
6. Teevo
7. Xykon's zombie dragon head
8. Roy's sword
9. The entire Hobgoblin army
10. The orc chieftain
11. The IFCC
12. Durkon while under the effects of Thor's might
13. Mr Scruffy
14. Hieronymus Grubwiggler
15. All of the Demon Roaches at once
16. Bone golem Roy
17. Roll again twice
18. Roll again on Tables 1, 2, and 3
19. Roll again twice on Initial Table
20. Roll again and switch gender

Minion List -Made By MReav

1. Goblin
2. Hobgoblin
3. Kobold
4. Ogre
5. Lizardfolk
6. Bug-people
7. Azure City Soldier
8. Bandit or Thieves Guild Member
9. Orc
10. Owlbear
11. Troll (flip coin to determine land or sea)
12. Zombie
13. Ghoul
14. City Guardsman
15. Angel-thing
16. Ghost Martyr
17. Roll again on another table.
18. Roll again twice
19. Roll Again and invert alignment
20. Roll again for minion army

Dead Guy List -Made By MReav

1. Samantha
2. Sangwaan
3. Hobgoblin General
4. Azure City General
5. Death Knight
6. Huecva
7. Trigak
8. Earth Dungeon Guardian
9. Fire Dungeon Guardian
10. Kraagor
11. Mijung
12. Eugene Greenhilt
13. Old Blind Pete
14. Giant Devil
15. Buggy-Lou
16. Isamu.
17. Roll Again on a different table
18. Roll Again Twice
19. Roll Again and Switch Gender
20. Roll again. If you roll this option twice in a row: Eastern Pantheon and World 1.0

Supplemental Plot Devices
Roll 1d4 (or more!)

1. Table 1
2. Table 2
3. Table 3
4. Table 4

Table 1 - By Nerdanel

1. Unrequited love
2. Love potion
3. Drunkenness
4. Snowed in
5. Stuck on a desert island
6. In the afterlife
7. Aliens Made Them Do It (not necessarily literal aliens)
8. True love
9. Love/hate relationship
10. Adultery
11. Pregnancy (use male pregnancy if needed)
12. Pink frills and white lace
13. French maid costume
14. Police/military uniform
15. High heels and black leather
16. American high school setting
17. Someone is a vampire
18. Everyone is a furry version of themselves
19. Kidnapped (By somebody inside or outside of the pairing)
20. Roll again twice

Table 2 - by Sereg

1. Dream Sequence
2. Anonymous Dating Service
3. Bodyswapped
4. Meta
5. Curse
6. Spell gone wrong
7. Damsel/dude in distress
8. Lots and lots of angst (because then it will be true art)
9. Amnesia
10. Mistaken identity
11. Genre shift
12. Finding “new uses” for objects
13. The real world
14. Geas/Quest
15. Zone of Truth
16. Truth, dare or command
17. Voyeurism
18. In a playground
19. Roll again twice
20. Roll again on another table

Table 3 - by Sereg

1. Fulfilling an unusual fantasy (as demonstrated in Coffee Included’s V x Haley x Elan with Belkar watching fic)
2. Arranged marriage
3. Already married
4. Prostitution
5. Concubines
6. Inheritance of wealth and/or title from obscure dead relative
7. Class change/multiclassing
8. Team Evil is trying to save the world from the Oots’ plan to control/release the snarl
9. Past/future life
10. In 20 years from current comic
11. They discover that they are close relatives at the end
12. Disease
13. “The whole party is controlled by giant space cats and Xykon is from modern Earth”
14. Deus ex machina
15. With the author
16. With another crack-pairer
17. On the web-site
18. Lampshading (roll again)
19. Roll again twice
20. Roll again on another table

Table 4 - by Sereg

• While arguing with the author
• It’s not them, it’s their players/character sheets/stat blocks/minis/dice (Yes, I know that this isn’t a game, but when have we let canon stand in our way?)
• To make someone else jealous
• To save the world
• Mind-control
• Twins separated at birth
• This is what the snarl actually does
• In a watery environment
• While under attack
• Because of a literal genie
• Because if they don’t they’ll die/get unmade
• On the rebound
• In jail/a dungeon
• While playing strip-(insert game here)
• Wardrobe malfunction
• On meds
• As part of their therapy
• With a giant
• With a subversion/aversion/inversion/double subversion of (roll again)
• Roll again twice

Of course, feel free to make up your own pairings!

[Lira]

Crack Pairings Story Index

Stories by Asta Kask

OOTS in Die Walküre
Elves and Ears
Elan/Therkla
Radic/someguyJanineknows

Stories by badam104172

Hinjo/Argent
Jirix/Redcloak

Stories by baf

Inkyrius/Zz'dtri

Stories by BatRobin

Belkar/Eye of Fear and Flame
Hilgya/YokYok
Julio Scoundrel/Entire Hobgolbin Army
Therkla/Vaarsuvius
Tsukiko/Jirix
Thog/Julio Scoundrel
Redcloak/Lien/Xykon [Part 1]
Redcloak/Lien/Xykon [Part 2]
Nale/Inkyrius
Xykon/Xykon

Stories by Belkster11

Roy/Elan [Part 1]
Roy/Elan [Part 2]
Roy/Elan [Part 3]
Hilgya/Inkyrius
Haley/Blackwing
Nale/Miko [Part 1]
Nale/Miko [Part 2]
Roy/MiTD

Stories by The Blackbird

Oracle/Flesh Golem Roy

Stories by TheBibliophile

Xykon/Miko
Vaarsuvius/Haley
Vaarsuvius/Haley [Continued]
Vaarsuvius/The Lizardfolk Whores

Stories by CapedLuigiYoshi

Lien/Lien

Stories by Cire II

Miko/Durkon

Stories by ClericOfBelker

Gender-swapped OOTS [Part "2"]
Gender-swapped OOTS [Part 3]
Gender-swapped OOTS [Part 4]
Gender-swapped OOTS [Part 5]
Gender-swapped OOTS [Part 6]
Belkar/Roy
O-Chul/ABD
Elan/Belkar/Haley/Roy
Roy/ABD
Closak/Black Dragons

Stories by Closak

Roy/Belkar/Ancient Black Dragon
ABD
ABD/Haley
ABD/Jirix
ABD/Redcloak
ABD/Redcloak
ABD/Roy
ABD/Janitor

Stories by CoffeeIncluded

Elan/Julio Scoundrel
O-Chul/Lien
Haley/Roy's Sword and Sara Greenhilt/Soon Kim
Inkyrius/Belkar
Julia/Pompey
Pompey/Sabine
Xykon/Roy's Sword
Belkar/Hinjo
Crystal/Vaarsuvius
Zz'Drti/Nale
Shojo/Aarindarius
Daigo/Kubota
Vaarsuvius/IFCC
OOTS/Giant Sand Worm
Mr. Scruffy/Vaarsuvius
ABD/Guy with the Halberd
Elan/Cactus
Inkyrius/Inkyrius/Vaarsuvius/Vaarsuvius
Haley/Hanukkah Gelt
Miko/Inkyrius
Vaarsuvius/Durkon
Vaarsuvius/Elan/Haley
Celia/Haley
Elan/Shadowdancer

Stories by Cracklord

Miko/Durkon
Inkyrius/Bozzok
O-Chul/Thog
Therkla/Crystal
Nale/The Shadow Dancer/Soulsplice
Tsukiko/Soon
Leeky Windstaff/Lord Kubota
Teevo/Thanh
O-Chul/Chief Grukgruk
Bozzok/Tsukiko/Crystal
Nale/Hinjo/O-Chul/Julia
Xykon/Thog
Edward Cullen/Harry Potter/Raistlin Majere/Xykon/Tsukiko/Lien/Stanley the Tool/Winston Churchill
Xykon/Julio Scoundrel
Belkar/Jenny
Eugene/Ydranna
Bozzok/Haley
Lord Shojo/Julio Scoundrel
Durkon/Lien
Durkon/Lien
Durkon/Lien
Durkon/Lien
Durkon/Lien [The Beginning]
Julia Greenhilt/Xykon
Bozzok/Zz'Dtri
Julia/Roy's Sword
Durkon/Lien
Roy/Sabine
Shojo/Miko
Durkon/Lien
Belkar in Hell [Part 1]
Belkar in Hell [Part 2]
Belkar in Hell [Part 3]
Belkar in Hell [Part 4]
Belkar in Hell [Part 5]
Belkar in Hell [Part 6]
Soon Kim/Mijung
Durkon/Lien
The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 1]
The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 2]
The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 3]
The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 4]
The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 5]
The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 6]
The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 7]
The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 8]
The OOTS in Girard's Gate [Part 9]

Stories by CurlyKitGirl

Elan/Banjo
Banjo/Haley
Sabine/Haley

Stories by Dak Frostwrath

Redcloak/Haley/Zz'dtri/Crystal/Hieronymus Grubwiggler

Stories by Dark Apprentice

Haley/Zz'dtri
Roy's Sword/The Really Dangerous Trap

Stories by The Dark Fiddler

Roy/Redcloak
MiTD/Entitre Hobgoblin Army
Celia/Gender-Flipped Celia
Crystal/Argent
Miko/Vaarsuvius
Nale/Tsukiko
The Oracle/Zz'Dtri

Stories by DarkElfGangsta

Julia/Nale

Stories by Dark_Stryke

Not for Everyone

Roy/Miko [Part 1]
Roy/Miko [Part 2]
Roy/Miko [Part 3]
Roy/Miko [Part 4]

It All Started With A Kiss

OOTS [Part 1]
OOTS [Part 2]
OOTS [Part 3]

Stories by Discord

Miko/Vaarsuvius
Miko/Vaarsuvius
Vaarsuvius/Zz'dtri
Vaarsuvius/Mother Black Dragon
Miko/Vaarsuvius
Jirix/Tsukiko
Vaarsuvius/Haley
Roy/Celia
Vaarsuvius/Miko
Vaarsuvius/Haley
Vaarsuvius/Vaarsuvius
Vaarsuvius/Haley [Part 2] [Continuation of ShinyDelusion's story]
Vaarsuvius/Haley

Stories by doliest

IFCC/Crystal
Windstriker/The Bandit King
Belkar/YokYok
Doliest/Dracula
Vaarsuvius/Aarindarius [Part 1]
Vaarsuvius/Aarindarius [Part 2]
Snarl/Haley/O-Chul

Stories by Dra-Goon

Xykon/Kazumi
Sarah Greenhilt/Roy's Archon
Celia/Mr Scruffy
The Eye of Fear and Flame/Haley
Roy's Sword/Bone Golem Roy
Ancient Black Dragon/Tsukiko/Monster in the Dark
Haley/Vaarsuvius/Durkon

Stories by Dr.Gunsforhands

Roy/Belkar

Stories by Elan's Modron

Modron/Slaad

Stories by Elvenblade

Redcloak/Jirix

Stories by esmerelder

Roy/Vaarsuvius
Girard/Serini
Girard/Serini
Gender-swapped Order of the Stick
OOTS/OOTS
Haley/Hank
Body-swapped OOTS [Part 1]
Body-swapped OOTS [Part 2]
Body-swapped OOTS [Part 3]
V/Belkar Spawnfic

Stories by Expeditious

Bone Golem Roy/Nale

Stories by Eztheria

MiTD/Xykon

Stories by Forevernade

Flesh Golem Roy/Crystal

Stories by Gimliggamer

Frodo/Entire Hobgoblin Army/Sam/Harry Potter
Elan/Redcloak

Stories by golentan

Mr. Rodriguez/Windstriker

Stories by Hijax

The Oracle/The Really Dangerous Trap

Stories by Introbulus

The Cliffport Chief of Police/Kazumi
Hydra/Lien
Tsukiko/Roy's Archon
Lord Shojo/Jirix
Durokan/Haley
Belkar/Hinjo
Haley/Crystal
Kazumi/Durkon

Stories by jogiff

Tsukiko/Miko/Redcloak

Stories by Kaytara

Mr. Scruffy/The Snarl
Ancient Black Dragon/Inkyrius
IFCC Fiends/The Chimera Trigak
Banjo/Giggles
Vaarsuvius and Durkon [Part 1]
Vaarsuvius and Durkon [Part 2]
ABD and Vaarsuvius
Belkar/Vaarsuvius

Stories by Kill Screen

Miko/Elan

Stories by Kirby

Celia/Vaarsuvius
Xykon/MiTD
Haley/Vaarsuvius
Soul Spliced Elan/Haley

Stories by Kitteh

Roy/Eye of Fear and Flame
Mr. Scruffy/Windstriker

Stories by Kobold-Bard

Leeky Windstaff/The Eye of Fear and Flame
Nale/Elan

Stories by Kraggi

Incorporeal Soon Kim/Mr. Scruffy

Stories by Kyronea

Haley/Durkon

Stories by Lawyergoblin

Brown-cloak/Haley
Redcloak/Celia [Part 1]
Redcloak/Celia [Part 2]

Stories by lindorm

Soon Kim/Jirix

Stories by Lollie

Belkar/Tsukiko

Stories by Lycan 01

Orc Chief Grukgruk/Haley/Kazumi
The Guy With the Halberd/Demon Roaches/Hydra
Daigo/Kubota
Yor/Belkar
Kazumi/Therkla
O-Chul/IFCC
Miko/Redcloak
Miko/Redcloak [Continued]
The Eye of Fear and Flame/Haley
Blackwing/Mr. Scruffy
Hinjo/Redcloak
Crystal/The Chimera
Belkar/Roy's Sword
Vaarsuvius/Ciaphas Cain [Part 1]
Vaarsuvius/Ciaphas Cain [Part 2]
Vaarsuvius/Ciaphas Cain [Part 3]
Vaarsuvius/Ciaphas Cain [Part 4]
Vaarsuvius/Ciaphas Cain [Part 5]
Vaarsuvius/Elan

Stories by MagicianMan5

Shadowdancer/Soul Splices
Haley/Vaarsuvius

Stories by Malkar Grumbo

Miko/Tsukiko [Chapter 1]
Miko/Tsukiko [Chapter 2]
Miko/Tsukiko [Chapter 3]
Miko/Tsukiko [Chapter 4]

Stories by Mariel Dragon

Haley/Belkar

Stories by MasamuneSSX

Miko/MiTD
Durkon/Sabine
Miko/Sabine
Miko/The Oracle
Miko/Vaarsuvius
ABD/The Oracle
Entire Hobgoblin Army/All The Demon Roaches

Stories by Meg

Redcloak/O-Chul
Tsukiko/Redcloak
Teevo/Hieronymus Grubwiggler
Roy/Roy's Archon
Roy's Sword/Nale
Belkar/Vaarsuvius
Elan/Vaarsuvius [Part 1]
Elan/Vaarsuvius [Part 2]
Redcloak/Tsukiko [Part 1]
Redcloak/Tsukiko [Part 2]
Redcloak/Tsukiko [Part 3]
Redcloak/The Snarl
Miko/Haley
Jeff/Hilgya
Vaarsuvius/Aarindarius
Vaarsuvius/Everyone [Part 2]
Kazumi/IFCC

Stories by Metalhead

Roy/Julia

Stories by mizzim

Haley/Nale
ABD/Miko

Stories by Monzach

Yokyok/Kobold Girl
Redcloak/Jirix

Stories by Moofin Bard

Therkla/Diago/Lien/Crystal/The Hydra
Mr. Scruffy/Belkar
Mr. Scruffy/Belkar [Continued]

Stories by Moon_Called

Haley/The Oracle

Stories by MReav

Tsukiko/Flesh Golem Roy
Lord Shojo/Belkar

Stories by Mr. Cales

Nale/Eastern Pantheon
Girard/Soon

Stories by NamonakiRei

The Snarl/Roy
Sarah Greenhilt/O-Chul
Miko/Oracle

Stories by Nathander

Celia/Thog
Lien/Hobgoblin Army
Daigo/Yokyok
Miko/Therka [Part 1]
Miko/Therka [Part 2]
Miko/Therka [Part 3]
Miko/Therka [Part 4]

Stories by NemoUtopia

Vaarsuvius/Black Dragon

Stories by Nerdanel

Male Sarah Greenhilt/Female Zz'dtri/IFCC

Stories by The Odor

Shojo/Miko
Argent/Razor
Blackwing/Haley
Gender-switched Oracle/Oracle
Haley/Lien
Vaarsuvius/Everyone [Part 3]
Haley/Vaarsuvius

Stories by Omergideon

Vaarsuvius/Inkyrius

Stories by Oooohaloophole

Nale/Sabine's Child [Part 1]
Nale/Sabine's Child [Part 2]

Stories by Pid6

Sarah Greenhilt/Hydra
Julio Scoundrel/Lord Shojo/Horace Greenhilt/Durokan/The IFCC

Stories by pnewman

Lien/Thog

Stories by PsychoPat

Nale/Haley and Elan/Celia
Haley/Vampire Shadowdancer
Redcloak/Tsukiko/Julio Scoundrel
Thog/Sabine
Thog/Sabine [Continued]
Thog/Sabine [Continued]
Thog/Sabine [Continued]

Stories by Ronnoc

Haley/Roy

Stories by RPGAgmJAY

O'Chul/Archon

Stories by Saeyan

Vaarsuvius/Aarindarius

Stories by SaintRidley

Celia/TiVo

Stories by Sequinox

Spongebob/Julio Scoundrel
Mr. Scruffy/Dangerous Trap

Stories by Sereg

Roy/Celia
Xykon/Celia
Tsukiko/Horace Greenhilt
Xykon/Redcloak [Part 1]
Xykon/Redcloak [Part 2]
Dragon's Hoard/Jephton/Haerta/Ganneron
Durkon/Death Knight
Pit Fiend/Zz'dtri
Therkla/Thieves Guild Member
Durkon/Vaarsuvius
Mr. Scruffy/Snuggles
Therkla/Banjo
Elan/Vaarsuvius
Julia/Durkon
Belkar/Nacle
Belkar/Crystal
Vaarsuvius/Haley's Personality Aspects
Haley/Celia
Roy/Eugene
Julio Scoundrel/Julio Scoundrel
Thog/Miko [Part 1]
Thog/Miko [Part 2]

Stories by Sewblon

Redcloak/Xykon

Stories by ShinyDelusion

Julia/Thog
Vaarsuvius/Haley/Elan [Part 1]
Vaarsuvius/Haley/Elan [Part 3] [Continuation from Discord's part]
Belkar/Matt
Elan/Haley/Roy
Hinjo/Tsukiko [Part 1]
Hinjo/Tsukiko [Part 2]
Janine/Lloyd
Nale/Sabine

Stories by ShneekeyTheLost

Tsukiko/Vaarsuvius

Stories by Silverraptor

Belkar/Nale
Miko/Hinjo
Inkyrius [Part 1], [Part 2], [Part 3], [Part 4]
Julia/Celia
Crystal/Belkar
Haley's Dream
Guy with the Halberd/Girl with the Halberd
Kazumi/Daigo
Kubota/Lien
Ceila/Mr Rodriguez
Tsukiko/Oracle
Elan/Vaarsuvius

Stories by Somniloquist

Nale/Therkla

Stories by Sstoopidtallkid

Sabine/Vaarsuvius
Mr. Scruffy/Scorpion
Weasel/Matt
Vaarsuvius/Dragon

Stories by Taekwondodo

Hinjo/Zz'dtri
Bozzak/Mr Rodriguez
Elan/The Cliffport Chief of Police
Therkla/Julio Scoundrel
Nale/Julio Scoundrel
Thanh/Female NPC
Windstriker/Argent
Edward/Tsukiko
Trigak/Sunken Valley Hydra [Part 1]
Trigak/Sunken Valley Hydra [Part 2]
Mr. Scruffy/Lord Shojo

Stories by Tatterdemalion

Miko/Soon Kim
Windstriker/Celia
Thog/Ian Starshine
MiTD/Haley
Nale/The Entire Hobgoblin Army

Stories by Thor Person Guy

Kazumi/Lord Shojo

Stories by Tira-chan

Roy/Elan
Therkla/Nale/Sabine
Haley/Mr. Scruffy

Stories by TooManySecrets

Roy/Xykon

Stories by TSED

Julia Greenhilt/The Chimera

Stories by waterpenguin43

Sabine/Vaarsuvius
Hilgya/Durkon
Miko/Tsukiko

Stories by Water-Smurf

In the Arms of Morpheus

Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 1]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 2]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 3]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 4]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 5]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 6]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 7]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 8]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 9]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 10]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 11]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 12]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 13]

Icelus

Vaarsuvius

Curse of Phobetor

Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 1]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 2]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 3]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 4]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 5]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 6]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 7]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 8]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 9]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 10]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 11]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 12]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 13]
Redcloak/Vaarsuvius [Part 14]

Tragedy of Hypnos

Redcloak/V Spawnfic [Part 1]
Redcloak/V Spawnfic [Part 2]

Pasithea's Messenger

Redcloak/V Spawnfic [Part 1]
Redcloak/V Spawnfic [Part 2]
Redcloak/V Spawnfic [Part 3]
Redcloak/V Spawnfic [Part 4]
Redcloak/V Spawnfic [Part 5]
Redcloak/V Spawnfic [Part 6]
Redcloak/V Spawnfic [Part 7]
Redcloak/V Spawnfic [Part 8]

Bridge Across the Stars

Redcloak/Vaarsuvius

In Vino Veritas

Belkar/Vaarsuvius

Claude Os, Aperi Oculos!

Belkar/Vaarsuvius

Quos Amor Verus Tenuit, Tenebit

Belkar/Vaarsuvius

Acta Non Verba

Belkar/Vaarsuvius [Part 1]
Belkar/Vaarsuvius [Part 2]

Pawns of the Gods

Mijung/Yutrin [Part 1]
Mijung/Yutrin [Part 2]
Mijung/Yutrin [Part 3]
Mijung/Yutrin [Part 4]
Mijung/Yutrin [Part 5]

Stories by Weimann

Jephton/Haetra/Ganonron/Julia Greenhilt/Jirix
Overpriced Apple Girl/The Most Awesome Pickpockets In The ENTIRE WORLD!
Overpriced Apple Girl/The Most Awesome Pickpockets In The ENTIRE WORLD! [Continued]

Stories by WhereamI?

Belkar/Vaarsuvius

Stories by Xesirin

Daigo/Elan
Miko/Daigo

Stories by Yiuel

Roy and Celia's Son/Elan and Haley's Daughter
Therkla/Yiuel

Stories by yubel

Stewie Griffin/Thog

Stories by Zanaril

Male Sarah Greenhilt/Female Zz'dtri/IFCC
Xykon/Vaarsuvius
Therkla/Belkar/Tsukiko
Therkla/Belkar/Tsukiko [Continued]
Mr Rodrigez/Gender-Swiched Mr Rodrigez
Vaarsuvius/Zz'dtri [continuation of Discord's story]
Vaarsuvius/Zz'dtri
Aarindarius/Inkyrius
Aarindarius/Inkyrius
Aarindarius/Inkyrius
Aarindarius/Inkyrius
Blackwing/Lizard Vaarsuvius
The IFCC/Zombie Dragon Head
Vaarsuvius/The Snarl
Vaarsuvius/Inkyrius/Aarindarius
Vaarsuvius/Haerta [Part 1]
Vaarsuvius/Haerta [Part 2]
Vaarsuvius/Haley/Vaarsuvius
Tass/Crack Pairings Thread
Vaarsuvius/Julio Scoundrel
Closak/ABD
Vaarsuvius/Everyone [Part 1]
Vaarsuvius/Everyone [Part 4]
Vaarsuvius/MitD

Stories by Zen_Heart

Belkar/Zz'dtri
Belkar/Zz'dtri [Continued]
Belkar/Zz'dtri [Continued]

Stories by Ziren

Tsukiko/Durkon
Tsukiko/Lord Kubota
Cliffport Chief/Nale
Bandit King/Redcloak

Stories by Zolkabro

Durkon/Demon Roach

[Lira]

Crack Pairings Art Compilation
A compilation of the art made specifically for the Crack Pairings Thread.

Spoiler

Show

Art by BatRobin

Tiasal (version one).


Tiasal (version two).

Art by Belkster11

Sangwaan and Hinjo.

Art by CheeseMuncher

Vaarsuvius and Redcloak.


Belkar.


Vaarsuvius and Redcloak.


Vaarsuvius and Roy.


Xykon and Redcloak.


Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


Tsukiko and Redcloak.


Tsukiko and Redcloak (coloured version).


Spliced Inkyrius.


Vaarsuvius.


Child of Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


Child of Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


Celia and Vaarsuvius.


Redcloak and Xykon.

Art by CoffeeIncluded

Inkyrius, Vaarsuvius and their children.

Art by Delorges

Vaarsuvius and Redcloak.


Miko and O-Chul.

Art by Discord

Vaarsuvius and Miko.


Tsukiko and Vaarsuvius.


Vaarsuvius and Tsukiko.


Lirian and Aarindarius.


Haerta and Vaarsuvius.


Vaarsuvius, Tsukiko, and their child.


Miko and Vaarsuvius.


Haley and Vaarsuvius.


Roy and Elan.


Aarindarius and Lirian.


Haley and Celia.

Art by Expeditious

Vaarsuvius and Blackwing.


Vaarsuvius.

Art by Funky Goose

A comic version of Water-Smurf's Vaarsuvius/Redcloak story.


Half-dragon child of Belkar.


Young Roy and the Little Psion that Could.

Art by half-halfling

Vaarsuvius and V's personifications of femininity and masculinity.


Vaarsuvius, Inkyrius, their children and the soul splice.


Tsukiko and Jirix.


Haley and Vaarsuvius.


MiTD and Tsukiko.


Child of Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


Inkyrius and Vaarsuvius.


Vaarsuvius' Parent and young Vaarsuvius.


Inkyrius and Vaarsuvius.


Vaarsuvius and Redcloak.


Tiasal and Terentius.


Jirix, Tsukiko, Redcloak, Celia, Belkar, Roy, Haley, Vaarsuvius, Inkyrius and their children, wishing Kaytara a happy birthday.


Tiasal, Tsukiko, and Xykon.


Plushie Dragon Vaarsuvius.


Aarindarius, Vaarsuvius, Inkyrius and their children.


Aarindarius.


Roy and Miko.


Therkla and Miko.


Elan, Roy, and Miko.


A scene from Water-Smurf's fanfic, featuring Haley, Roy, Elan, and a mysterious creature.


Aarindarius and Inkyrius.

Art by Kaytara

Vaarsuvius.


Vaarsuvius and Redcloak.


Vaarsuvius.


Vaarsuvius and Roy.


Vaarsuvius and Roy (coloured version).


Young Vaarsuvius.


Spliced Inkyrius.


Vaarsuvius and Miko.


Vaarsuvius and Miko (coloured version).


Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


Mr. Scruffy, Belkar, Vaarsuvius, and Blackwing.


Aarindarius.


Aarindarius.


Aarindarius (coloured version).


Redcloak, Vaarsuvius, and their child.


Redcloak, Vaarsuvius, and their child (coloured version).


Right-Eye and Redcloak.


Tiasal, Xykon, and Tsukiko.


Tiasal.

Art by Kirby

Haley and Vaarsuvius.


Spliced Elan.

Art by MReav

O-Chul and female members of the Sapphire Guard and Azurite soldiers.

Art by The Neoclassic

Lien and the Yellow-Eyed Fiend.


Evil Lien.

Art by Oooohaloophole

Tiasal as an infernal scion.


The Dark One and a goblin god (?).


Tiasal.


Tiasal.


Tiasal.


Tiasal.

Art by Saeyan

Vaarsuvius with a Miko doll.


Vaarsuvius with a Miko doll.


Aarindarius and Inkyrius.


Zz'dtri and Vaarsuvius.


Inkyrius.


Aarindarius, Inkyrius, and Vaarsuvius.


A wanted sign for Zanaril.


A wanted sign for Zanaril (version 2).


Vaarsuvius.


Inkyrius and Aarindarius, with Vaarsuvius and Zz'dtri in chibi form.


Aarindarius, Inkyrius, and Vaarsuvius.


Inkyrius, Vaarsuvius, and Aarindarius.


Inkyrius and Vaarsuvius.


Aarindarius and Vaarsuvius.


Vaarsuvius.


Child of Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


Vaarsuvius.


Vaarsuvius and V&RC's child.


Tiasal.


Vaarsuvius.


Tsukiko.


Scenario for Water-Smurf, featuring Tiasal and Redcloak.


Vaarsuvius and Aarindarius.


Vaarsuvius and Inkyrius.


Vaarsuvius and Inkyrius.

Spoiler

Show

Aarindarius and Vaarsuvius.

Art by Tira-chan

Spock and Vaarsuvius.

Art by TooManySecrets

Female living Xykon.

Art by Trixie

Celia and Belkar.


Xykon, Tsukiko, and Miko.

Art by Yiuel

"The OOTS Jr."



OOTS Jr.


OOTS Jr.


OOTS Jr.


OOTS Jr.


Joan.

Art by Zanaril

Undead Vaarsuvius and Xykon.


Miko and Vaarsuvius.


Redcloak and Vaarsuvius.


Xykon.


Spliced Inkyrius.


Spliced Inkyrius.


Spliced Inkyrius and Vaarsuvius.


Young Vaarsuvius.


Tiasal.


Argent and Windstriker.


Aarindarius and Vaarsuvius.


Child of Closak and the ABD.


Haley and Vaarsuvius.


Vaarsuvius, Redcloak, and Tiasal.


Xykon and Tsukiko.


Vaarsuvius and Tsukiko.


Vaarsuvius and Tsukiko (coloured version).

[CoffeeIncluded]

YAY! New thread time!

Also, anybody got a cold shower for Water-Smurf? She's been staring at her hands for the past 20 minutes.

[The Dark Fiddler]

Ok guys, new thread, and it's all happy and good, but I think we've got to crack down a bit. I hate to be a killjoy, but our last thread strayed wildly off topic a lot. So, (just as an example, nothing meant personally, and no names given) even though we're sorry you're having school problems and love to help, that's not really the topic of the thread. The rest of the forum is full of kind people, and they'd help to if you asked. I don't want to have a mod in here for any reason other that to help us revel in our infamy, and off-topicness is one reason they might bring down the hammer on us.

Also, what's with the squickies?

[CoffeeIncluded]

Ok guys, new thread, and it's all happy and good, but I think we've got to crack down a bit. I hate to be a killjoy, but our last thread strayed wildly off topic a lot. So, (just as an example, nothing meant personally, and no names given) even though we're sorry you're having school problems and love to help, that's not really the topic of the thread. The rest of the forum is full of kind people, and they'd help to if you asked. I don't want to have a mod in here for any reason other that to help us revel in our infamy, and off-topicness is one reason they might bring down the hammer on us.

Also, what's with the crackies?

I'm sorry, I just...You know.

And you mean the squickies? ...I dunno...

[Water-Smurf]

Oh God, my head hurts like hell...

*rubs head*

Anyway, if we have to stay on topic, then we'll just... *rubs head again* you know, try to nudge each other in the right direction. We all want to keep the thread.

[The Dark Fiddler]

I'm sorry, I just...You know.

I know, I've been somewhere near that myself before. Like I said, nothing personal, and I'm sure the kind folks at, for example, the Depression Thread(?) could help.

And you mean the squickies? ...I dunno...

I should have known enough to check the name before I posted.

[Nathander]

Man, moving to a new thread is like moving into a new house. It's always so empty when you first settle in.

[ClericOfBelker]

*Hides from Watersmurf*

SHE"S STILL UNDER THE EFECTS OF THE LOVE POTION!

[BatRobin]

Ok, someone roll me up a pairing, I feel like writing.

[CoffeeIncluded]

Ok, someone roll me up a pairing, I feel like writing.

Julia Greenhilt/Durkon.

GogoGO!

[The Dark Fiddler]

Julia Greenhilt/Durkon.

GogoGO!

Lass, ye need to respect yet body.
Julia: Teach me, you Dwarf!

[Kyronea]

You know, I remember back when this first got started, when it was just a few tables, you roll, then post a sentence or two of silliness--if that.

Now, it's turned into an amazing writer's workshop, where the budding authors of the GITP forums cut their teeth and hone their skills as they work to master their craft.

Well done, everyone.

[The Dark Fiddler]

Now, it's turned into an amazing writer's workshop, where the budding authors of the GITP forums cut their teeth and hone their skills as they work to master their craft.

Which is why I entertained the idea of moving the thread to the Arts and Crafts forum.

[CoffeeIncluded]

Which is why I entertained the idea of moving the thread to the Arts and Crafts forum.

Please don't.

[ShinyDelusion]

Yay! New thread! So.

I was half asleep earlier today and was thinking about this thread and Coffee's comic (I don't know when I started thinking/dreaming about the Crack Pairing thread in bed, and I'd rather not contemplate the implications...) and I remembered someone asking why Matt wanted to stay out of Maximum Security (or whatever it was called if I'm remembering that wrong) aside from the fact it was Maximum Security. (Before I forget, speaking of Coffee's comic, I literally lol'd at your fan comic, Discord.) Then for some reason I imagined a Maximum Security that every criminal avoids at all costs, for its only occupant is a mass murderer halfling who has been alone so long (having quickly stabbed and beheaded any cell mates) that he's snapped and begun talking to the aforementioned severed heads, even affectionately petting one and calling it "Mr. Scruffy". Matt was thrown into Maximum Security for an hour once. First the halfling began ranting about what an obvious disguise "you androgynous twit" was wearing just to come in and gloat over him but then things got far more alarming when he started coming at him grinning maniacally and saying something along the lines of, "You know what happens to pretty, purple-haired, elves is prison?"

I'll admit, I did consider keeping this thought to myself, but, then I thought about how I would feel if something I'd written had inspired a zany, slightly disturbing, crossover crack pairing, so I figured Coffee wouldn't mind.

If only I could figure out how Belkar ended up there in the first place, I could almost write the fic...

Lass, ye need to respect yet body.
Julia: Teach me, you Dwarf!

Yes. This simply must be written.

[CoffeeIncluded]

Yay! New thread! So.

I was half asleep earlier today and was thinking about this thread and Coffee's comic (I don't know when I started thinking/dreaming about the Crack Pairing thread in bed, and I'd rather not contemplate the implications...) and I remembered someone asking why Matt wanted to stay out of Maximum Security (or whatever it was called if I'm remembering that wrong) aside from the fact it was Maximum Security. (Before I forget, speaking of Coffee's comic, I literally lol'd at your fan comic, Discord.) Then for some reason I imagined a Maximum Security that every criminal avoids at all costs, for its only occupant is a mass murderer halfling who has been alone so long (having quickly stabbed and beheaded any cell mates) that he's snapped and begun talking to the aforementioned severed heads, even affectionately petting one and calling it "Mr. Scruffy". Matt was thrown into Maximum Security for an hour once. First the halfling began ranting about what an obvious disguise "you androgynous twit" was wearing just to come in and gloat over him but then things got far more alarming when he started coming at him grinning maniacally and saying something along the lines of, "You know what happens to pretty, purple-haired, elves is prison?"

I'll admit, I did consider keeping this thought to myself, but, then I thought about how I would feel if something I'd written had inspired a zany, slightly disturbing, crossover crack pairing, so I figured Coffee wouldn't mind.

If only I could figure out how Belkar ended up there in the first place, I could almost write the fic...

I don't mind at all. Seriously. Go nuts; I love this!

Oh, and even better? Matt hates elves.

[Silverraptor]

I know this is off topic. But I'll make it quick...

No, not really. It's just that I've been doing other things simultaneously and didn't start reading as soon as you requested. It only took me two sessions. I must confess that I'm finding the plot a little...slow. However, I'm still enjoying it and that's not really unexpected at the beggining of a webcomic.

Yeah. I'm sorry about that. But once you get past the first 10 comics, it starts picking up. Basically, the first ten is to establish the characters and the settings so well that no one will get lost.

[ShinyDelusion]

I don't mind at all. Seriously. Go nuts; I love this!

Yay! Glad I didn't get a for that thought! If I find the time and inspiration, perhaps I shall write it tomorrow or later tonight.

[Water-Smurf]

Yay! Glad I didn't get a for that thought! If I find the time and inspiration, perhaps I shall write it tomorrow or later tonight.

I only know of a small handful of authors who don't appreciate fanfiction, speculation, fan art, etc. It's just something that shows that you really like a story, and I think that I speak for a lot of people when I say that it gives a good bunch of authors a small high to see stuff like that.

So, really, asking to use other people's continuities/characters, while courteous, is most likely just politeness for the sake of politeness. Most people, myself included, give an immediate 'yes.'

[CoffeeIncluded]

Oh, and for those who want another crack pairing with my comics, here's some inspiration for you!:

Take a look at the one that I just updated.

How are they going to heal that?

[Silverraptor]

Oh, and for those who want another crack pairing with my comics, here's some inspiration for you!:

Take a look at the one that I just updated.

How are they going to heal that?

Think Paladin/Lloyd, aka "Lay on Hands"

[ShinyDelusion]

I only know of a small handful of authors who don't appreciate fanfiction, speculation, fan art, etc. It's just something that shows that you really like a story, and I think that I speak for a lot of people when I say that it gives a good bunch of authors a small high to see stuff like that.

So, really, asking to use other people's continuities/characters, while courteous, is most likely just politeness for the sake of politeness. Most people, myself included, give an immediate 'yes.'

I figured (like I said, if someone did the same for something of mine (not that I have a lot of original work to speak of in the first place) I'd definitely be cool with it), but I was a little apprehensive about the possibility that I was walking the line between "d'Aww! She wants to write a fan fic!" and "Dude! Who comes up with suggestive prison scenes involving Belkar while half-asleep?!"

[Sstoopidtallkid]

I may post a fanfic for your comic tonight CI, though I doubt it will be what you expect.

Edit:I may want to make some actual quotes out of context, it essentially starts by creating overtones that were not there during one of the strips, that okay?

[BatRobin]

Ok, I'll write Julia/Durkon, but it'll:


-Be taking place right after weathercontrolweathercontrolweathercontrolweatherc ontrolweathercontrolweathercontrolweathercontrolwe athercontrolweathercontrol so therefore out fo storyline

-and be tomorrow, I'm sleepy now.

[CoffeeIncluded]

I may post a fanfic for your comic tonight CI, though I doubt it will be what you expect.

Edit:I may want to make some actual quotes out of context, it essentially starts by creating overtones that were not there during one of the strips, that okay?

Okay. Just don't make it R-rated. That's my only guideline.

This should be great.

Yay Batrobin!

[ShneekeyTheLost]

Doing a bit of polishing on my Darth V x Tsikiko ship in the intervening time frame before I'm allowed to post on FF.net. I must say, it is... very citrus flavored. Although not for all audiences. I may have to put sufficient 'tags' to warn people what they're about to get into before reading.

I'd probably rate it 'M', on the FF.net ratings

[Dark_Stryke]

I've thoroughly enjoyed it so far, and will likely to continue to do so, barring a catastrophic author breakdown.

Figured I'd reply to this here. Thanks for the kind words, and I don't plan on a catastrophic author breakdown, but who knows? I could snap at any moment!


As for the "new" "rules" (I put both in quotations because neither is entirely accurate), what is considered on-topic and what isn't?

Like, obviously any story or discussion of a story is on-topic. What about talking about Coffee and Silver's comics? My inner rules lawyer says no, but, as Kyronea pointed out, this thread has expanded into something of a writers' workshop, and Coffee's characters at least are available to be Crack Paired.

I think no matter what some off-topic discussion is going to come up. The best we can do is try to minimize it or move it to another thread.


And finally: New Thread! Wooooo!

[CoffeeIncluded]

Doing a bit of polishing on my Darth V x Tsikiko ship in the intervening time frame before I'm allowed to post on FF.net. I must say, it is... very citrus flavored. Although not for all audiences. I may have to put sufficient 'tags' to warn people what they're about to get into before reading.

I'd probably rate it 'M', on the FF.net ratings

I like lemonade and lemon snacks.