Meh: The Domain

[Cipher Stars]

This really isn't helpful advice, but I read this wrong, thought it was a domain of 'Meh', and was very exited. Mostly to find out hoe you turned apathy into a domain power.

Meh

I'd give a description here, but I don't really feel like it right now.

Granted Power:
Through the Meh domain, you receive the granted power to do nothing for one round. Until the start of your next turn you are under the effects as though by the Sanctuary spell with a DC equal to your casting stat.


Domain Spells:

1st: Reluctant Compliance
2nd: Maybe Later
3rd: I'll get around to it
4th: Spread the Meh
5th: Relaxed Stature
6th: Caring is for wussies
7th: Quiet Place
8th: I was going to, but then I got shot in the knee with an arrow.
9th: Meh


Special: [Meh] spells with somatic components are not subject to spell failure, but still fail if the subject would be completely prevented of movement such as by Paralysis.

Reluctant Compliance
[Abjuration] [Meh]
Level: Sor/Wiz 1, Meh 1
Components: -
Casting Time: Immediate Action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: None (Harmless)
Spell Resistance: No (Harmless)

Description:
Reluctant Compliance may be cast when ever you would be moved against your will, either by unwanted teleportation, bull rushes, or similar effects.
Whenever you would be moved, you can choose not to move. 1d12 rounds later, you must make that movement. However, you get a new save against the effect (Such as a new strength check against a bull rush, or a new will save against forced teleportation).



Maybe Later
[Abjuration] [Meh]
Level: Sor/Wis 2, Meh 2
Components: V
Casting Time: Swift Action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: 1 round/level
Saving Throw: None (Harmless)
Spell Resistance: No (Harmless)

Description:
When this spell is cast, you choose one ongoing effect you are victim of. That effect is canceled for 1 round per caster level, after which time it resumes as normal.

I'll get around to it
[Abjuration] [Meh]
Level: Sor/Wiz 3, Meh 3
Components: V
Casting Time: Immediate Action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: See Text
Saving Throw: None (Harmless)
Spell Resistance: No (Harmless)

Description:
When you would be killed in combat, you can choose not to die. Roll 2d4, you don't die until that many rounds pass on the end of your turn.
Should you die of old age, you can use this as well but to extend your life by 1d4 years.


Spread the Meh
[Enchantment] [Meh]
Level: Sor/Wiz 4, Meh 4
Components: M
Casting Time: Standard Action
Range: 30ft +5ft per caster level
Target: One living, breathing creature
Duration: See Text
Saving Throw: Will Negates
Spell Resistance: No

Description:
You make a long, drawn out yawn. We all know yawns are contagious, but what happens when said yawn is imbued with the very powers of Meh?
One living, breathing creature within a close range of the caster must make a will save or spend all their actions on their next turn doing nothing but yawning and looking around uncaring. one round later, they must make another will save or have their Wisdom and Intelligence drop to 1 and loose all motivation to do anything, even live. When they yawn, one random ally of the victim within 30ft is subject to this same spell.
This effect lasts a number of rounds equal to how much they failed their save by. They may make a will save each round, if they fail four times in a row the effects are permanent until someone casts Break Enchantment, Wish, or Miracle.

Relaxed Stature
[Abjuration] [Meh]
Level: Sor/Wiz 5, Meh 5
Components: S
Casting Time: Swift Action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: 24 hours
Saving Throw: None (Harmless)
Spell Resistance: No

Description:
You adopt a slouch, and a dazed lifeless eyes. By the sheer power of Meh, you ignore all damage until it would kill you. You are immune to critical hits, and death from massive damage. In addition, you are immune to all effects requiring a will save, but automatically fail effects requiring a Reflex save that take place before the first round of a combat and are always treated as being Flat-Footed. (Triggering a trap out of combat for example would result in automatic failure, or a surprise attack.)


Caring is for wussies
[Enchantment] [Meh]
Level: Sor/Wiz 6, Meh 6
Components: V,S
Casting Time: Swift Action
Range: Touch
Target: Creature Touched
Duration: 1 round/level
Saving Throw: Will (Harmless)
Spell Resistance: No

Description:
At a touch, you grant someone the effects of Relaxed Stature except as stated here.


Quiet Place
[Conjuration] [Teleportation] [Meh]
Level: Sor/Wiz 7, Meh 7
Components: S
Casting Time: Standard Action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: 24 Hours
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

Description:
You teleport yourself to the Plane of Silence, to your own demiplane therein created temporarily when you cast this spell. The demiplane cannot be entered by any living being but yourself. The realm is completely silent, and time does not exist here. Meaning, when you go back no time has passed beyond your Standard Action to first cast this spell.


I was going to, but then I got shot in the knee with an arrow.
[Abjuration] [Meh]
Level: Bard 6, Sor/Wiz 8, Meh 8
Components: V
Casting Time: Swift action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: None (Harmless)
Spell Resistance: No

Description:
After speaking an obscure cultural meme, you automatically succeed on any bluff check made as an excuse for an action (Or lack there of). Thus, you can slaughter a city of innocents and make your excuse to go home free. (assuming you get a trial :P)


Meh
[Universal] [Meh]
Level: Meh 9
Components: V
Casting Time: Immediate Action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: Instantaneous
Saving Throw: None
Spell Resistance: No

Description:
With a single short word, you can ignore any single effect as if it never happened. This only functions on yourself, and for effects targeting you or would effect you. In an area effect, you simply ignore the problem and act normally. You may ignore obscure things, such as gravity, or the fact that you just walked over a cliff edge.
This spell can only be cast once every 1d6 rounds.

[NeoSeraphi]

This is a pretty funny domain. I especially like the lack of somatic components for most of the spells because, meh, who has the energy to wave their arms around when they're casting spells. That's way too much work, man.

[The-Mage-King]

I'll get around to it
*Snip*
When you would be killed in combat, you can choose not to die. Roll 2d4, you don't die until that many rounds pass on the end of your turn.
Should you die of old age, you can use this as well but to extend your life by 1d4 years.

How very, very silly.


People die when they are killed. That's the way it's supposed to be.



Otherwise, I could care less about this domain.

[Cipher Stars]

This is a pretty funny domain. I especially like the lack of somatic components for most of the spells because, meh, who has the energy to wave their arms around when they're casting spells. That's way too much work, man.

Exactly. And the somatic components that there are in the context are simple shrugs or a roll of the eyes.

[Amechra]

I now want to play a Cleric with Automatic Still Spell, Automatic Silent Spell, that metamagic feat that makes spells look like they come from another direction, and some form of metamagic reduction.

Instead of casting spells in combat, he would take a nap, and let those damned spells cast themselves! What is he, some kind of spellcaster or something? Sheesh.

[Ziegander]

I now want to play a Cleric with Automatic Still Spell, Automatic Silent Spell, that metamagic feat that makes spells look like they come from another direction, and some form of metamagic reduction.

Instead of casting spells in combat, he would take a nap, and let those damned spells cast themselves! What is he, some kind of spellcaster or something? Sheesh.

Sounds like Jake the Dog.

[bobthe6th]

Ahh... now I can legitimately play a cleric of Ronson. now for a beer domain...

[Abel XIV]

I was going to make an ellaborate, useful comment on this domain, but the power of Meh compells me not to.

I do like it very much though. I'd be glad to try it out should I ever get the chance.

[Grod_The_Giant]

Not just funny, but useful to boot. Who'd have thought that not giving a **** was such a powerful defense?

[paddyfool]

Meh

Relaxed Stature
[Abjuration] [Meh]
Level: Sor/Wiz 5, Meh 5
Components: S
Casting Time: Swift Action
Range: Personal
Target: You
Duration: 24 hours
Saving Throw: None (Harmless)
Spell Resistance: No

Description:
You adopt a slouch, and a dazed lifeless eyes. By the sheer power of Meh, you ignore all damage until it would kill you. You are immune to critical hits, and death from massive damage. In addition, you are immune to all effects requiring a will save, but automatically fail effects requiring a Reflex save that take place before the first round of a combat and are always treated as being Flat-Footed. (Triggering a trap out of combat for example would result in automatic failure, or a surprise attack.)

I don't really understand what you mean by "you ignore all damage until it would kill you". Are you talking about being able to continue to act normally until you hit -10 hit points, or about being able to ignore attribute damage, or something else?

[1whoscribbled]

I don't really understand what you mean by "you ignore all damage until it would kill you". Are you talking about being able to continue to act normally until you hit -10 hit points, or about being able to ignore attribute damage, or something else?

Meh ...

Spoiler

Show

[Eldan]

Actually, some of these seem really strong. 24 free hours to do crafting, or resting, healing, preparing spells? Quite good. And Spread the meh is an awesome save-or-suck.

[AtlanteanTroll]

I love this, and I know it's a joke, but were I to implement it, there's no way I could call it the "meh" domain. What'd be a good "real" word? Apathy?

[ImperatorV]

I think this might actually be a bit overpowered, but who has time for balancing?

[Anxe]

Why does the 9th level spell have a restriction on how many times it can be cast per combat if it can only be prepared as a domain spell? Won't there only be one that can be used per day ever?

[erikun]

There are feats and abilities that allow you to prepare and/or cast multiple domain spells, including one that will allow a cleric to spontaneously give up spell slots to cast domain spells instead of healing spells.

Or is that in addition to?

Meh, can't be bothered to verify.

[Debihuman]

I don't think a 3rd level spell should let you exceed your maximum age.

Debby

[Pokonic]

I first read this as 'Meth: The Domain'.

I am, however, immensely pleased by this.

[Lord of Shadows]

For some strange reason, I feel compelled to care about this Meh, of which you speak.

In appreciation of some of the previous posts, the following is scribbled for the good of all that is Meh:

• For the 3rd level I'll get around to it, change the life extension from 1d4 years to 1d4 rounds. Some things just can't be put off forever.
  
• Relaxed Stature could start out with: You adopt a slouch and dazed, lifeless eyes. By the sheer power of Meh, you ignore all damage until the total reaches an amount that would kill you (by your core rules).
  
• Add the following to Quiet Place: You can remain inactive normally while within your demiplane, and must eat and sleep as normal.
  
• And finally, for the ultimate in Meh-ness, Meh itself, add the following line: This spell can only be cast once every 1d6 rounds regardless of any item, feat, or other allowance to cast it more often.

Ok, I think I can go back to not caring now... Meh Forever!
.