Crack Pairings VII - Bring Bottled Water, Our Water is Spiked With Love Potion

[Symmys]

*basks in praise*

I like Inky too.

I'll see if I can get some more up before the weekend, but no promises.

[icastflare!]

*basks in praise*

I like Inky too.

I'll see if I can get some more up before the weekend, but no promises.

yay! would it encourgage you that there is a fact you will get a crack pairing out faster than me

[CoffeeIncluded]

yay! would it encourgage you that there is a fact you will get a crack pairing out faster than me

Hey, if you're having trouble with ideas, how about this line of inspiration? I tried fitting it into V/Nale, but it didn't work out.

"Who used up all the hot water?!"

EDIT: Hmm...Maybe I should do another High School one.

*Grins evilly* *Idea*

Hmm...Since Tsukiko canonically "Does both", and when Haley gets her haircut her gender (Also canonically) becomes somewhat ambiguous to some people...

[icastflare!]

Hey, if you're having trouble with ideas, how about this line of inspiration? I tried fitting it into V/Nale, but it didn't work out.

"Who used up all the hot water?!"

not that, probably should have explained more. Working on web comic we dont have a thread up yet but it will be reviewed by a mod soon and be up eventually. got a banner in my sig spoilers. can send you the 2 comics we have made right now If you want. Crimson angel did the art. I did the writing.

[NemoUtopia]

Hey, if you're having trouble with ideas, how about this line of inspiration? I tried fitting it into V/Nale, but it didn't work out.

"Who used up all the hot water?!"

EDIT: Hmm...Maybe I should do another High School one.

*Grins evilly* *Idea*

Hmm...Since Tsukiko canonically "Does both", and when Haley gets her haircut her gender (Also canonically) becomes somewhat ambiguous to some people...

Actually, you're thinking of Julia's reference to going both ways during the rescue. Tsukiko 'goes both ways' by reference of the MitD, and she clarifiesobjects strenuously that she does the living and the dead, but that was one time with a female skeleton was a mistake...leading MitD to clarify that he meant arcane and divine. If it weren't for her specific mention of gender without any remorse for her necrophilia, I'd agree though.

[CoffeeIncluded]

Actually, you're thinking of Julia's reference to going both ways during the rescue. Tsukiko 'goes both ways' by reference of the MitD, and she clarifiesobjects strenuously that she does the living and the dead, but that was one time with a female skeleton was a mistake...leading MitD to clarify that he meant arcane and divine. If it weren't for her specific mention of gender without any remorse for her necrophilia, I'd agree though.

Crack. Pairings. Thread.

[icastflare!]

Crack. Pairings. Thread.

it is the cry for all reason in this thread, and other threads.

[NemoUtopia]

it is the cry for all reason in this thread, and other threads.

If I get ragged on for 'forgetting' Thog's cootie fear, I can point out character innacuracies elsewhere That said, crack away! It's just a minor plot twist away, after all.

[icastflare!]

If I get ragged on for 'forgetting' Thog's cootie fear, I can point out character innacuracies elsewhere That said, crack away! It's just a minor plot twist away, after all.

well someone has to remember it, well besides me when I use that base for an actual dnd character

[CoffeeIncluded]

not that, probably should have explained more. Working on web comic we dont have a thread up yet but it will be reviewed by a mod soon and be up eventually. got a banner in my sig spoilers. can send you the 2 comics we have made right now If you want. Crimson angel did the art. I did the writing.

I'll take a look later.

And to get back on topic, I'm going to post that Haley/Tsukiko high school (Let's say it's before she and Elan hooked up)

Sorry if it sucks, I'm kinda tired.

Spoiler

Show

Haley sat on the long bumpy bus ride, touching her hair and muttering angrily to herself. That must have been the WORST stylist ever. All she wanted was a little trim! Just a bit past the shoulders! And now her hair was almost as short as Elan's...

Haley felt like burying her head in her hands as she walked into school. No way she could face them with this haircut. She could already feel everyone watching...Staring...The eyes...

It was now biology class, and at least Haley had found something to be thankful about with this hair debacle; she had no trouble keeping it out of her eyes while they did this rat dissection. Ggh, but they were forced to pair up and Elan was sick, so she was forced to work with that Tsukiko creep who always dressed in black and doodled skeletons in her notebook...

She mentally slapped herself. Remember that Dark Mistress Shadowgale phase?!

Unfortunately, yes. You realize how ashamed I am about the "MUSIC" I listened to?!

Then stop complaining, especially about Tsukiko. She'll turn around in a few years.

And if she doesn't?

Then she'll make a damn good forensic pathologist.

Yeah, assuming she doesn't discover other...Applications for a long, bloodied femur.

...Oh! Look, we've got to finish this before the end of the period! Why don't we work with her and talk about this later, okay?

With a heavy sigh, Haley walked over to Tsukiko and forced a smile. Odd...The girl, usually so morose in the hallways, seemed to almost beem as she cut apart the rat with extreme deftness and care, handling the rat's body in a respectful manner as she carefully removed each organ and explained its function in detail, then writing it down. Haley found this a very refreshing change from Belkar's behavior at the next table over; he had just decided to eviscerate the dead rat, rip out its spine, then use its skull as some macabre finger puppet before crushing it with his pen while giggling.

"So how long before he decides to take that scalpel and mutilate the rat's--Ah."

Tsukiko's expression darkened as she muttered to himself, "He's disgusting. He really should learn to treat the dead with more dignity and respect."

Haley looked at Tsukiko. "Hm. Didn't really expect that coming from you."

"Then apparently you don't know me at all...Haley, is it?"

"Yeah." Haley groaned to herself. And here comes the inevitable hair remark...

"Nice hair."

"...Wait. Huh? Nice hair? ...This isn't some kind of sick joke, is it? Did Belkar throw some organ in my hair? Because this wouldn't be the first time."

"No. I just think it looks nice on you."

"...Oh. Thanks." Haley couldn't help but blush a bit. She would never admit this, but in her "Dark Mistress" phase, she found Tsukiko more than a bit cute.

...She still felt a bit like that, but she pushed those thoughts deep down inside where she could forget about them. Except now they were starting to peek out...

"Uhm...Haley?" Tsukiko looked curiously at Haley as the two of them finished their notes and cleaned up the lab station.

"Yes?"

"Uhm, well, we're in the same English class, and I'm having a bit of trouble, and I know you're good in English, but I'm better than you in Bio, so... Uh, would you...Could you, uh..."

Haley smiled. "Sure thing, Tsukiko! I'd be glad to come over later tonight! We can both help study together."

Oh come on. That's not what the two of you will be doing tonight and you both know it.

So, uh...Thoughts?

[Aaron]

Roy x Lloyd (from Murphy's Law - Coffee's webcomic)

Spoiler

Show

Lloyd looked at the other warrior. He was everything Lloyd admired in a man - self-confident, experienced, tough... yet there was a touch of sadness around him. A feeling that things weren't the way they were supposed to be.

"So, you've been adventuring with these for how long?"

"Oh, we're just starting out. We're looking for a dragon."

The other warrior nodded. He asked a few more questions, and without really knowing how it happened Lloyd suddenly realized he had told the other warrior much more than he intended. Even about Janine...

"I mean, it's like all she wants is sex. Yeah, that's important, but I want something more than that. I want a relationship, and it feels like she'll just go off in search of the next conquest five minutes after she's had me."

"Yes," said the other warrior. "I understand. But let me tell you something - I'm in a relationship with a sylph right now. She's a great girl, but being away from her for so long... you get the itch, y'know. Like this..."

The other warrior leaned over and kissed Lloyd softly on the mouth. Lloyd tensed up at first, then relaxed. He had never dreamt that being kissed by a man could be so wonderful. A whirlpool of emotions welled up inside him and drowned all thoughts of the quests, all thoughts of Janine, all thoughts...

Thoughts?

Hee-hee. This is 100% canon!

Crack. Pairings. Thread.

Sky's. The. Limit. and the rules.

And to get back on topic, I'm going to post that Haley/Tsukiko high school (Let's say it's before she and Elan hooked up)

Sorry if it sucks, I'm kinda tired.

Spoiler

Show

Haley sat on the long bumpy bus ride, touching her hair and muttering angrily to herself. That must have been the WORST stylist ever. All she wanted was a little trim! Just a bit past the shoulders! And now her hair was almost as short as Elan's...

Haley felt like burying her head in her hands as she walked into school. No way she could face them with this haircut. She could already feel everyone watching...Staring...The eyes...

It was now biology class, and at least Haley had found something to be thankful about with this hair debacle; she had no trouble keeping it out of her eyes while they did this rat dissection. Ggh, but they were forced to pair up and Elan was sick, so she was forced to work with that Tsukiko creep who always dressed in black and doodled skeletons in her notebook...

She mentally slapped herself. Remember that Dark Mistress Shadowgale phase?!

Unfortunately, yes. You realize how ashamed I am about the "MUSIC" I listened to?!

Then stop complaining, especially about Tsukiko. She'll turn around in a few years.

And if she doesn't?

Then she'll make a damn good forensic pathologist.

Yeah, assuming she doesn't discover other...Applications for a long, bloodied femur.

...Oh! Look, we've got to finish this before the end of the period! Why don't we work with her and talk about this later, okay?

With a heavy sigh, Haley walked over to Tsukiko and forced a smile. Odd...The girl, usually so morose in the hallways, seemed to almost beem as she cut apart the rat with extreme deftness and care, handling the rat's body in a respectful manner as she carefully removed each organ and explained its function in detail, then writing it down. Haley found this a very refreshing change from Belkar's behavior at the next table over; he had just decided to eviscerate the dead rat, rip out its spine, then use its skull as some macabre finger puppet before crushing it with his pen while giggling.

"So how long before he decides to take that scalpel and mutilate the rat's--Ah."

Tsukiko's expression darkened as she muttered to himself, "He's disgusting. He really should learn to treat the dead with more dignity and respect."

Haley looked at Tsukiko. "Hm. Didn't really expect that coming from you."

"Then apparently you don't know me at all...Haley, is it?"

"Yeah." Haley groaned to herself. And here comes the inevitable hair remark...

"Nice hair."

"...Wait. Huh? Nice hair? ...This isn't some kind of sick joke, is it? Did Belkar throw some organ in my hair? Because this wouldn't be the first time."

"No. I just think it looks nice on you."

"...Oh. Thanks." Haley couldn't help but blush a bit. She would never admit this, but in her "Dark Mistress" phase, she found Tsukiko more than a bit cute.

...She still felt a bit like that, but she pushed those thoughts deep down inside where she could forget about them. Except now they were starting to peek out...

"Uhm...Haley?" Tsukiko looked curiously at Haley as the two of them finished their notes and cleaned up the lab station.

"Yes?"

"Uhm, well, we're in the same English class, and I'm having a bit of trouble, and I know you're good in English, but I'm better than you in Bio, so... Uh, would you...Could you, uh..."

Haley smiled. "Sure thing, Tsukiko! I'd be glad to come over later tonight! We can both help study together."

Oh come on. That's not what the two of you will be doing tonight and you both know it.

So, uh...Thoughts?

This is comedy gold! My tummy hurts and I can't stop laughing from the punchline! Great job Coffee!

[Asta Kask]

*basks in praise*

I like Inky too.

I'll see if I can get some more up before the weekend, but no promises.

Poor Inky. Caught between sense of duty and voice of reason...

I'll take a look later.

And to get back on topic, I'm going to post that Haley/Tsukiko high school (Let's say it's before she and Elan hooked up)

Sorry if it sucks, I'm kinda tired.

Spoiler

Show

*snip*

So, uh...Thoughts?

Read it, understood it, liked it. I laughed, especially at Belkar. He is a little creep, isn't he?

[Zanaril]

Which part made you think of that?

“I will not allow something as small as a potentially fatal birthing process take away unnecessarily from the time I have with my newborn and her father.”

I normally put it down as just being V's way of talking, but there's absolutely no way that V doesn't know how that sounds. I knew V was snarky, but it just didn't regester until now that when she words things like this, she's doing it on purpose to make a point.

Actually, since I mentally hear it as being said in a serious tone, it might be an example of verbal irony.

[CoffeeIncluded]

Thanks guys.

Read it, understood it, liked it. I laughed, especially at Belkar. He is a little creep, isn't he?

Actually, almost all the guys in class did that when we had a rat dissection.

Funny how you can get inspiration from almost anything!

[Monzach]

Hi guys, sorry for my long absence, but I was really ill for some time there. I have a nice little idea for a (first time for me) series of fics, but I just need to clear up a few rules and regulations of the D&D world here. The main thing of my idea is that a young V planeshifts to be alone with hir thoughts and ideas. The bad thing is that s/he planeshifts, in error, to the demiplane of Shakespearean Romcoms (DUM dum DUM)! So, basically, how does planeshift work in 3.5 Ed.? Is it possible for a young and inexperienced V to shift in error to the setting of many a meeting, some of the by moonlight?

If your answers are not what I hoped for, I'll just houserule it, mm-kay?

[Water-Smurf]

*Hugs* How you doing?

*tips over green bottle* *a few drops come out* I need more of this stuff. Excuse me. *scuttles away*

Random: Know what's funny? Water-Smurf really reminds me of a good friend of mine. (As in, for a moment I thought they were the same person.)

Oooo, really? Do tell, do tell...

I normally put it down as just being V's way of talking, but there's absolutely no way that V doesn't know how that sounds. I knew V was snarky, but it just didn't regester until now that when she words things like this, she's doing it on purpose to make a point.

Actually, since I mentally hear it as being said in a serious tone, it might be an example of verbal irony.

*laughs* But it's true! Redcloak should know better than to think that V would be down and out because of nearly dying from a birth that she wasn't ready for!

[Zanaril]

*tips over green bottle* *a few drops come out* I need more of this stuff. Excuse me. *scuttles away*

Got anything that helps with nausea? I spent most of last night throwing up.

*laughs* But it's true! Redcloak should know better than to think that V would be down and out because of nearly dying from a birth that she wasn't ready for!

And she's going to make sure Reddy knows it!

[Lix Lorn]

RedV is still awesome. <3
Also, loved the HaleyTsukiko.

Has anyone ever done HaleyCrystal?

[Zanaril]

Has anyone ever done HaleyCrystal?

The people on the fanservice thread probably have.

[half-halfling]

I've made a new picture -it's Roy and Celia dressed as Miko . This katana is supposed to be cut out of cardboard . Alternative text for Roy to say was "But I must warn You I can summon a titan to fight by my side"

Spoiler

Show

[Asta Kask]

I've made a new picture -it's Roy and Celia dressed as Miko . This katana is supposed to be cut out of cardboard . Alternative text for Roy to say was "But I must warn You I can summon a titan to fight by my side"

*laughs*

*looks again*

*laughs*

Now that's kinky. Reminds me of when Spike demanded that Harmony dress up as Buffy.

The main thing of my idea is that a young V planeshifts to be alone with hir thoughts and ideas. The bad thing is that s/he planeshifts, in error, to the demiplane of Shakespearean Romcoms (DUM dum DUM)! So, basically, how does planeshift work in 3.5 Ed.? Is it possible for a young and inexperienced V to shift in error to the setting of many a meeting, some of the by moonlight?

Houserule it. The problem is that D&D isn't a skill-based system, so there's no provision for characters failing with spells. You only fail under special circumstances (which demand a Concentration check), and then nothing happens. Also, this is a 7th level spell - far beyond anything young V could hope to cast. And it's a conjuration spell, which is her barred school. So from a rules point of view - impossible.

But you won't be stopped by such a trivial matter, will you?

Got anything that helps with nausea? I spent most of last night throwing up.

Are you pregnant?

Actually, almost all the guys in class did that when we had a rat dissection.

That tells me a lot about the guys in your class. I understand why you prefer B.

How does your heart get broken in a good way?

The same way a sad poem or maudlin' music does. It gives you a great lump in your throat and tears in your eyes, and you know somewhere that it's not real but that doesn't really matter. I'm a passionate man, and because of that I keep my passions on a short leash. It's good to let loose sometimes (I love horror movies for the same reason).

Hmm... we need some new adjectives for this thread...

Smurfy: possessing doom, gloom, and break the cutie in large amounts. Your story is very smurfy.

Any other suggestions? Coffelicious? Zanaritude?

[Closak]

GAH! PAGE STRETCHER!


"Stretching the page is an illogical course of action, we do not understand why you organics act as you do"
"For once i agree with flashlight head there"
"Our head is not a flashlight"
"Yes it is, it totally is"
"Organic jumping to false conclusions, does not bother examining the facts closer, why?"

[Lix Lorn]

Love the piccie-oh, and maybe that's why she doesn't like that school of magic? XD

[Zanaril]

I've made a new picture -it's Roy and Celia dressed as Miko . This katana is supposed to be cut out of cardboard . Alternative text for Roy to say was "But I must warn You I can summon a titan to fight by my side"

I hope they remembered to lock that door.

Are you pregnant?

*facepalm* Trust this thread to come up with something like that.

Zanaritude?

'Zana' sounds a bit like 'zany'.

[Aaron]

Actually, almost all the guys in class did that when we had a rat dissection.

Funny how you can get inspiration from almost anything!

They all sound like Belkar.

I've made a new picture -it's Roy and Celia dressed as Miko . This katana is supposed to be cut out of cardboard . Alternative text for Roy to say was "But I must warn You I can summon a titan to fight by my side"

*takes second look*

*laughs*

Great job half-halfing! It's very Kinky!

Are you pregnant?

*facepalm* Trust this thread to come up with something like that.

You had it coming.

[Zanaril]

You had it coming.

I don't know whether it's more funny or less funny when you consider how horrendously high the teen pregnancy rate is where I live.

[Asta Kask]

I don't know whether it's more funny or less funny when you consider how horrendously high the teen pregnancy rate is where I live.

And I notice you still haven't answered the question...

[Closak]

*Points and laughs at Zanaril*

So who did you- MMPPFF! *Get's dragged away*


"We are detecting a high concentration of female hormones in the air"
"..."
"Moving in to investigate"
"Just...don't"

[Zanaril]

And I notice you still haven't answered the question...

I didn't think I needed to. No, it was definitely some virus or something because two other people in my family have been sick in the last few days. Predictably, I seem to have been the worst off. (Although the extra day off school was handy...)

*Points and laughs at Zanaril*

So who did you- MMPPFF! *Get's dragged away*

That's what you get for trying to ship shippers. Now where did I leave the anti-dragon spray...

[Aaron]

I don't know whether it's more funny or less funny when you consider how horrendously high the teen pregnancy rate is where I live.

The joke part: funny!

In real life: less funny.

That's what you get for trying to ship shippers. Now where did I leave the anti-dragon spray...

*Hands Zanaril some extra "Dragon Begone"*
Clerics always carry these around.