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  1. - Top - End - #1231
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Kelvin360's Avatar

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    Has anybody come up with VxVxBelkar (all genderswitched)?

  2. - Top - End - #1232
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    Quote Originally Posted by BatRobin View Post
    His life, a thing you probably don't have.
    Her.

    Who needs sports when we have Dnd, OOTS, RvB, Halo, and the all important Grifball!
    What's Grifball?

    Also:

  3. - Top - End - #1233
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    The Blackbird's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by Saeyan View Post

    Also:
    This is hilarious.

    You earn the three internets from this.
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    Left-Eye by NamonakiRei
    Stick swordsman of the Kyrie fanclub!
    My bro's homebrew class.

    How to: Glibness

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  4. - Top - End - #1234
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    RedWizardGuy

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kelvin360 View Post
    Has anybody come up with VxVxBelkar (all genderswitched)?
    I think the universe might explode if it did happen.
    I Am A: Chaotic Good Human Sorcerer (3rd Level)
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  5. - Top - End - #1235
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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    Quote Originally Posted by Saeyan View Post
    What's Grifball?
    its a very important sport on halo, that originated on red vs blue. See the rules here: Grifball

    Your welcome.*bows*
    Last edited by Gimliggamer; 2009-09-10 at 04:45 PM.
    Dolla dolla bill, y'all

  6. - Top - End - #1236
    Titan in the Playground
     
    MindFlayer

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    Quote Originally Posted by mizzim View Post
    Don't be sad, I don't have a life either.



    Celia/haley/teevo plot device: pregnancy.
    I have something of a life. It revolves around RPGs, Warhammer 40K, and my girlfriend...

    Edit: Uh, I mean... Life? What life? I have no life... Don't kill me.

    Who's Teevo? I might take a whack at that one...


    So I rolled up a couple of crack pairings earlier, and I got one that just... works...

    Daigo x Kabuto with kidnapping

    *cracks knuckles*

    Spoiler
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    Daigo struggled to escape the ropes that bound him to a very uncomfortable chair. The room he was in was dark, except for one very annoying light shinning down on him from the ceiling. The last thing he remembered was waking up to go to the bathroom, and then the sound of footsteps behind him, followed by an odd smell filling his nostrils. Some sort of knock-out gas, he assumed. Somebody had kidnapped him... And he had a good idea as to who it was.

    Sure enough, the shadowy outline of Lord Kabuto soon appeared in front of him from the shadows. "Good evening, Daigo..." the corrupt noble crooned. His face was obscured by darkness, but the light from the ceiling reflected eerily off of his grinning teeth.

    "Kabuto..." Daigo growled, narrowing his eyes at the figure in front of him. "Let me guess... You kidnapped me so you could torture information out of me about Lord Shinjo, right?"

    "Not exactly..." the outline of Kabuto's head shifted from side to side.

    "You want to try and convince me to join you in taking over?" Daigo snarled. "Good luck... I'll never help you..."

    "You assume too much..." Kabuto chuckled.

    "You want to gloat before you kill me, since you figure my death will spread confusion and paranioa amongst Lord Shinjo's followers and cause him to lose support?" Daigo arched an eyebrow. Why was he here?

    "No, no, no... Although, I will have to remember that idea for later use..." Kabuto's shadowy figure struck a thinking pose for a moment. "No, my plans for you are much... much simpler..."

    "What do you want from me, then?!" Daigo yelled, angry and confused about what was going on.

    "Heh heh heh..." Kabuto chuckled. "Daigo... I think you know exactly what I want..."

    Daigo could only stare in horror as the shadowy figure of Kabuto began to unbutton its shirt.


    Poor Daigo.
    Last edited by Lycan 01; 2009-09-09 at 09:58 PM.
    Anemoia: Nostalgia for a time you've never known.

  7. - Top - End - #1237
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    RedWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    Quote Originally Posted by Lycan 01 View Post
    I have something of a life. It revolves around RPGs, Warhammer 40K, and my girlfriend...



    Who's Teevo? I might take a whack at that one...


    So I rolled up a couple of crack pairings earlier, and I got one that just... works...

    Daigo x Kabuto with kidnapping

    *cracks knuckles*

    Spoiler
    Show

    Daigo struggled to escape the ropes that bound him to a very uncomfortable chair. The room he was in was dark, except for one very annoying light shinning down on him from the ceiling. The last thing he remembered was waking up to go to the bathroom, and then the sound of footsteps behind him, followed by an odd smell filling his nostrils. Some sort of knock-out gas, he assumed. Somebody had kidnapped him... And he had a good idea as to who it was.

    Sure enough, the shadowy outline of Lord Kabuto soon appeared in front of him from the shadows. "Good evening, Daigo..." the corrupt noble crooned. His face was obscured by darkness, but the light from the ceiling reflected eerily off of his grinning teeth.

    "Kabuto..." Daigo growled, narrowing his eyes at the figure in front of him. "Let me guess... You kidnapped me so you could torture information out of me about Lord Shinjo, right?"

    "Not exactly..." the outline of Kabuto's head shifted from side to side.

    "You want to try and convince me to join you in taking over?" Daigo snarled. "Good luck... I'll never help you..."

    "You assume too much..." Kabuto chuckled.

    "You want to gloat before you kill me, since you figure my death will spread confusion and paranioa amongst Lord Shinjo's followers and cause him to lose support?" Daigo arched an eyebrow. Why was he here?

    "No, no, no... Although, I will have to remember that idea for later use..." Kabuto's shadowy figure struck a thinking pose for a moment. "No, my plans for you are much... much simpler..."

    "What do you want from me, then?!" Daigo yelled, angry and confused about what was going on.

    "Heh heh heh..." Kabuto chuckled. "Daigo... I think you know exactly what I want..."

    Daigo could only stare in horror as the shadowy figure of Kabuto began to unbutton its shirt.


    Poor Daigo.
    Poor Daigo indeed
    Last edited by Malkar Grumbo; 2009-09-09 at 09:59 PM.
    I Am A: Chaotic Good Human Sorcerer (3rd Level)
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  8. - Top - End - #1238
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    Silverraptor's Avatar

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    I only check this thread because it's Fiddler's. I also say hardly anything about it because we're playgrounders. So go on and keep playing.

    Edit: Alright Fiddler, I'll play. I've rolled and here are the result's

    Spoiler
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    "Are you sure they're here?"

    "Yes, I'm sure"

    "Well if your sure then where should we lay the trap?"

    "I'm not quite sure yet. We haven't gotten a visual on them. So let's fan out and look for them one by on-"

    "Thog want ice cream! Thog is hot! Thog feels chafing in Thog's-"

    "Whoa! That's enough! Don't want to visualize that. Sabine take Thog and find him some ice cream. I will look for the order and my idiot brother myself."

    "Where will I find ice cream in a desert like this, Nale?!"

    "I don't know, just do it!" Nale storms off down a row of tents. He turns right and walks a little further. Just then, on the other side of some tents he hears a voice that is moving. He doesn't quite hear what it says, but he recognizes who it belongs to and sneaks off trying to find it. He peaks around a tent and sure enough, there was the fellow strategist making a purchase for... a sextant? It seems that the order was going somewhere that they needed direction from the stars.

    "This is a lovely place to spy, isn't it?"

    "Yes it is my psychopatic friend. Soon you and..." realizes who he's talking to "Gah! How'd you find me?!"

    "I recognize your scent anywhere after what happened that night after parcheese. Speaking of which, We have unfinished business, you and I" Pulls out some daggers.

    Nale backs away from the evil grin of Belkar and stumbles into a vacant tent.

    Belkar follows, "Hey! This is perfect! I don't know *How* angry Roy would be if I killed you in public. I'm sure this will shorten the arguement considerably." He pulls on the tent flaps, closing them and advances on Nale.

    "I don't think so you lunatic. Charm Person!"

    "Oh hi Nale! My you look spiffing on the floor like that."

    "Whew! thank the gods his will save is so low."

    "My that shirt looks like it makes you look so darn hot. Maybe you should remove it."

    "What?!"

    "You heard me." And in a bounding leap, Belkar cuts off Nale's shirt and pins him on the ground.

    "What are you doing?!?!"

    "Tending to a friends physical discomforts and giving him pleasure. Now hold still, it will feel better when were done."

    "OH CRAP! He rolled a 1!"
    Last edited by Silverraptor; 2009-09-09 at 10:43 PM.
    My own webcomic. Idiosyncrasy.
    Paladin Academy: Chapter 2 Part 28

    *Avatar by Me*

  9. - Top - End - #1239
    Orc in the Playground
     
    TheBibliophile's Avatar

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    Lives are actually quite nice at times.

    On another note... Water Smurf, have you ever considered sitting down and writing a full-length romance novel? I'd buy it!
    Amazingly cool avatar by Mauve Shirt. May she ever be promoted and not demoted! *promotes*
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  10. - Top - End - #1240
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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    [roll]1d4[/roll]
    [roll]1d20[/roll]

    [roll]1d4[/roll]
    [roll]1d20[/roll]

    ([roll]1d20[/roll])


    Never mind.
    Last edited by Kobold-Bard; 2009-09-10 at 04:37 AM.
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    Quote Originally Posted by OverlordJ View Post
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  11. - Top - End - #1241
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    Kobold-Bard's Avatar

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    Leeky WindstaffxThe Eye of Fear and Flame in the Afterlife.

    Oh this will hurt my mind....

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    Wandering through the leafy underbrush of the Beastlands, Leeky missed his hawk Kitty, she had somehow managed to dodge the Paladin's sword. "Lucky pidgeon" he mumbled to himself.

    An explosion to his left startled him. Someone was destroying his beloved plants. They would perish. Pushing through the shrubs with little difficulty (Druid after all) he found the culprit. A skull bouncing from rock to tree shooting Fireballs a everything that didn't move, and black light at everything that did.

    Leeky wasn't one to stand by while nature was destroyed, so arming himself with Fire Immunity he shifted into his Dire Bear form and bounded in, catching the thing off guard and smacking him into a tree.

    Looking up at the bear the EoFaF began whimpering like a little girl. "Please don't kill me, I have a wife back home, and little skele-kids. Pleeeease."

    Looking down at the skull, Leeky had an idea. "So you can shoot all kinds of things out your eye sockets, right?"

    "Umm, yessir, I can."

    "Hmmm, I wonder if that works the other way as well?" A fangy smile crept over the Bear's face as he scooped up the skull in a colossal paw.

    "Mommyyyyyyyy.........."


    Alright I know that was cr-p, but I'm not a writer, merely someone with waaaay too much time on their hands.
    Last edited by Kobold-Bard; 2009-09-10 at 05:43 AM.
    Piratebold-Bard by Elder Tsofu | Backer #121 of the Giantitp Kickstarter | My homebrew
    Quote Originally Posted by OverlordJ View Post
    New law: Obey me or you'll be crushed by a MOUNTAIN.

  12. - Top - End - #1242
    Orc in the Playground
     
    TheBibliophile's Avatar

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    What the hey, I'll do another pairing.

    Vaarsuvius x Haley

    By the way, I see Vaarsuvius as male and will write as such. Also, the traditional elven term for one's soulmate is "hife", a portmanteau of husband and wife.

    Spoiler
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    It had all started when Sir Greenhilt had founded the party. I immediately noticed the rogue he hired, Miss Haley Starshine by name. We elves traditionally are not in the least attracted to a defined gender; androgyny is what "turns us on", as I believe the expression is. Besides, I already had a hife and children at home. But my marriage was arranged by our parents, and Inky (as I was forced to call hir) was not happy with me. Still, elven society forced us to give the impression that we loved one another, and I kept up this deception even out of the elven homeland.

    Anyway, Miss Starshine fascinated me strangely. I felt a strange tingling in the region of my crotch, which I had never felt before. Elves have no special organs in that area; they reproduce asexually, by cell mitosis. At least, most elves did. Ever since my two-decade-long puberty at fifty, when I had developed my spellcasting powers, I had noticed a strange cylindrical object protruding from between my legs. I made no mention of it, but when I was older my research told me that it was what the "male" members of the non-androgynous species used to reproduce. This worried me greatly, and finally I resolved to travel the lands, looking for mention of previous elves with this ailment. I joined up with the adventuring party for safety; I had already been accosted by several unsavoury individuals who apparently found me attractive. I was forced to scorch them a little, at which they ran away, half-naked.

    I digress. Miss Starshine and I shared a room at the caravanserai which we stayed in that night, for she took me for the only other woman in the group. I explained that elves are androgynous and reproduce asexually, a secret which she promised to keep to herself. There was a mirror on the wall next to my bed, and I caught myself sneaking peeks at Miss Starshine as she undressed. She was beautiful, I thought. I hastily got into bed, trying to banish these treacherous thoughts from my mind.


    To be continued...
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  13. - Top - End - #1243
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Dark Faun's Avatar

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    There's something incredibly hilarious in elves reproducing by cell mitosis.

    OtOoPCs spoiler:
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    It conflicts a little with the prequel book though since Haley and Vaarsuvius knew each other before being hired by Roy. But that's a minor detail I'm willing to ignore.
    Formerly known as Discord here and Maladin on avatarspirit.net.

  14. - Top - End - #1244
    Orc in the Playground
     
    TheBibliophile's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by Discord View Post
    There's something incredibly hilarious in elves reproducing by cell mitosis.

    OtOoPCs spoiler:
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    It conflicts a little with the prequel book though since Haley and Vaarsuvius knew each other before being hired by Roy. But that's a minor detail I'm willing to ignore.
    I haven't read OtOoPCs yet. That's why.

    So, what did you think of the story overall? To be honest when I was writing it I thought it was a lot longer than it actually is.

    Oh, and the mitosis thing; I knew there was something I could use my Biology IGCSE for!
    Amazingly cool avatar by Mauve Shirt. May she ever be promoted and not demoted! *promotes*
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  15. - Top - End - #1245
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheBibliophile View Post
    Lives are actually quite nice at times.
    What do you mean. I only find them being in the way of important stuff like Crack Pairings. How do you do spoiler tags.
    Evil. Iam diffrent. Have a problem with that...
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  16. - Top - End - #1246
    Orc in the Playground
     
    TheBibliophile's Avatar

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    Do this:

    Spoiler
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    Quote the post and you'll see what I did.
    Amazingly cool avatar by Mauve Shirt. May she ever be promoted and not demoted! *promotes*
    Books are a mind-altering substance. Therefore, I am high all the time.
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  17. - Top - End - #1247
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    RedWizardGuy

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    Quote Originally Posted by Discord View Post
    There's something incredibly hilarious in elves reproducing by cell mitosis.

    OtOoPCs spoiler:
    Spoiler
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    It conflicts a little with the prequel book though since Haley and Vaarsuvius knew each other before being hired by Roy. But that's a minor detail I'm willing to ignore.
    Why do I get the feeling that if it ever comes up in the actual comic, this will be the explanation that is given?
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  18. - Top - End - #1248
    Orc in the Playground
     
    TheBibliophile's Avatar

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    That would be very cool.
    Amazingly cool avatar by Mauve Shirt. May she ever be promoted and not demoted! *promotes*
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  19. - Top - End - #1249
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    The Odor's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by TheBibliophile View Post
    Do this:

    Spoiler
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    Quote the post and you'll see what I did.
    yay now i can to write my fanfic about shojo and miko
    Spoiler
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    Miko cried loudly. This was here first night ever away from the dojo
    and she was scared. All the other paladins in practice looked at her. Suddenly the door opend and in steped an old man with a cat on his arm and said:
    -Whats the matter. I can't sleep.
    -It`s the new girl. said another apprentice.
    -Whats the matter girl. said the old man.
    -It`s my first night away from the dojo. said miko quietly.
    -Well the gods demand that you are brave and mister scruffy needs he`s beauty sleep so i'll sitt here untill you fall asleep. ok. he said.
    -Ok. said miko and went to sleep. And she swore that she were going to do anything for him in the rest of her life and never cry again...

    So how bad was it. Fixed some typos and fixed the story a tad...
    Last edited by The Odor; 2009-09-11 at 07:51 AM.
    Evil. Iam diffrent. Have a problem with that...
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  20. - Top - End - #1250
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    Dark Faun's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by TheBibliophile View Post
    So, what did you think of the story overall?
    I liked it. I never thought about V's marriage being arranged or them not loving each other.

    The irony of Haley making V sleep with her because she thinks he's a girl is pretty delicious too.
    Formerly known as Discord here and Maladin on avatarspirit.net.

  21. - Top - End - #1251
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gimliggamer View Post
    Where the f** is Zanaril?
    *stares sadly at large pile of homework in front of her*

    When they said A levels would be hard, they meant it. I'll try to get some writing done at the weekend though, or failing that I'll draw something.

    You know what I find amusing about Biology? We have to use the specific vocabulary (hence why I keep getting centrioles, centromeres and chromotids mixed up) but they all basically translate to "the coloured thing" or "the thing in the middle".
    Last edited by Zanaril; 2009-09-10 at 09:40 AM.
    This post may contain sarcasm.
    DeviantArt

  22. - Top - End - #1252
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    Quote Originally Posted by TheBibliophile View Post
    What the hey, I'll do another pairing.
    Bib (can I call you that?), the mitosis is hilarious. So are half-naked, smoking unsavory individuals. I think the idea of a loveless arranged marriage is great - plus it's also entirely plausible, so now we can write ride wride on the village bicycle without Kyrie-guilt. Also, hooray V/H! At long last (because I was too lazy to write something by myself)!

    But the grammar (tenses mostly) is a bit inconsistent. The "anyway" at the start of the second paragraph seems pretty out of place.

    If you're interested, I can prepare a list of comments and things on the story.

    When they said A levels would be hard, they meant it.
    Oh no my 'O'-levels...

    You know what I find amusing about Biology? We have to use the specific vocabulary (hence why I keep getting centrioles, centromeres and chromotids mixed up) but they all basically translate to "the coloured thing" or "the thing in the middle".
    But centrioles are the things at the sides! But yeah, chromatids and chromosomes are a pain in the rear.
    Last edited by Saeyan; 2009-09-10 at 09:42 AM.

  23. - Top - End - #1253
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    TheBibliophile's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by Zanaril View Post
    *stares sadly at large pile of homework in front of her*

    When they said A levels would be hard, they meant it. I'll try to get some writing done at the weekend though.

    You know what I find amusing about Biology? We have to use the specific vocabulary (hence why I keep getting centrioles, centromeres and chromotids mixed up) but they all basically translate to "the coloured thing" or "the thing in the middle".
    Hey, you're a Brit! A-levels!
    Last edited by TheBibliophile; 2009-09-10 at 09:43 AM.
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  24. - Top - End - #1254
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    Quote Originally Posted by Saeyan View Post
    Oh no my 'O'-levels...
    ...I don't get it.
    This post may contain sarcasm.
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  25. - Top - End - #1255
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    TheBibliophile's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by Saeyan View Post
    Bib (can I call you that?), the mitosis is hilarious. So are half-naked, smoking unsavory individuals. I think the idea of a loveless arranged marriage is great - plus it's also entirely plausible, so now we can write ride wride on the village bicycle without Kyrie-guilt. Also, hooray V/H! At long last (because I was too lazy to write something by myself)!

    But the grammar (tenses mostly) is a bit inconsistent. The "anyway" at the start of the second paragraph seems pretty out of place.

    If you're interested, I can prepare a list of comments and things on the story.
    Please do. I would appreciate that mightily.

    And yes, you can call me Bib.
    Last edited by TheBibliophile; 2009-09-10 at 09:44 AM.
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  26. - Top - End - #1256
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Saeyan's Avatar

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    Quote Originally Posted by Zanaril View Post
    ...I don't get it.
    Eh, I was just freaking out over an impending 'O'-level exam. Because you mentioned 'A'-levels. I'm not making sense, am I?

    Please do. I would appreciate that mightily.
    I'll do it tomorrow: check back in about 12 hours.
    Last edited by Saeyan; 2009-09-10 at 09:47 AM.

  27. - Top - End - #1257
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    Zanaril's Avatar

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    Quote Originally Posted by Saeyan View Post
    Eh, I was just freaking out over an impending 'O'-level exam. Because you mentioned 'A'-levels. I'm not making sense, am I?
    Ah. Here they replaced O-levels with GCSEs.

    Quote Originally Posted by TheBibliophile View Post

    Vaarsuvius x Haley

    By the way, I see Vaarsuvius as male and will write as such. Also, the traditional elven term for one's soulmate is "hife", a portmanteau of husband and wife.
    That was deliciously cracky.
    Last edited by Zanaril; 2009-09-10 at 09:52 AM.
    This post may contain sarcasm.
    DeviantArt

  28. - Top - End - #1258
    Orc in the Playground
     
    TheBibliophile's Avatar

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    So they did. One of which I'm studying for at the moment, and one of which I've already done.
    Amazingly cool avatar by Mauve Shirt. May she ever be promoted and not demoted! *promotes*
    Books are a mind-altering substance. Therefore, I am high all the time.
    My old avatars. Thanks, y'all!
    Some poetry I've written. Constructive criticism warmly welcomed.

  29. - Top - End - #1259
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    The Odor's Avatar

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    What do I have to do to get some comments
    Evil. Iam diffrent. Have a problem with that...
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    Thanks To Mr Saturn for Goth Man avatar.

  30. - Top - End - #1260
    Orc in the Playground
     
    TheBibliophile's Avatar

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    Default Re: Crack Pairings Matchup Table

    Quote Originally Posted by Zanaril View Post
    That was deliciously cracky.
    Thanks. Any chance of some more feedback?

    Odor: I thought it was good, but the grammar kind of distracted me from the story. Not wishing to be a nazi or anything, but still.
    Last edited by TheBibliophile; 2009-09-10 at 10:10 AM.
    Amazingly cool avatar by Mauve Shirt. May she ever be promoted and not demoted! *promotes*
    Books are a mind-altering substance. Therefore, I am high all the time.
    My old avatars. Thanks, y'all!
    Some poetry I've written. Constructive criticism warmly welcomed.

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