It look fairly decent. I didn't laugh or anything, but hey. It's the first comic.
Nitpick: In the banner you forgot the space between "all" and "I", and wrote "allI".
Oh and btw, is he supposed to smile in the first comic? Because from the speech and the eyebrows I get the feeling he should be, but it seems he is smiling.
__________________ - Hi, my name is Smallwink and I'll be your signature for the evening!
It look fairly decent. I didn't laugh or anything, but hey. It's the first comic.
Nitpick: In the banner you forgot the space between "all" and "I", and wrote "allI".
Oh and btw, is he supposed to smile in the first comic? Because from the speech and the eyebrows I get the feeling he should be, but it seems he is smiling.
Thanks didn't notice the banner thing.
__________________
I am a Neutral Good Human Wizard (1st Level)
Without evil there can be no good so it must be good to be evil some times.
My house of Kirbies
I made my avvie, Yay me! I can also make one for you! Why am I using so many exclamation points?! I don't know! MOAR EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!!!!!!!!
My Awards:
Ok, listen. Your artwork is good, but I have a few suggestions for you.
Put all new comics in the first post by editing it, in addition to posting new posts. It makes it easier to find the comics and read them in order.
Please, I know you may not be the best speller, but can you at least just check it over or have somebody else look over it? If you have Inkscape, it should be a quick and easy fix.
Try to put more effort into explaining what is going on. If people have no idea what just happened in between comics, that's a sign that maybe you should make a comic in between explaining it, or maybe even just adding an extra pannel or two at the beginning or end.
Use Spellcheck.
Spoiler
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nageto004
yea Im not to good at that...
"Yeah, I'm not too good at that..."
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cizak
Good, I guess. Doesn't like teh fact that nothing is happening, but I'll keep checking.
"Good, I guess. I don't like the fact that nothing is happening, but I'll keep checking."
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cizak
Nitpick-time: "I didn't know what one to get" should be "I didn't know wich one to get".
No, actually it should be "I didn't know which one to get."
Quote:
Also: Why are everyone smiling? They don't "sound" (you know what I mean) like their happy och so, but everyone has smily mouths?
I don't even know what you were trying to say with och. Smiley has an e.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nageto004
Finaly Issue #5 is up and the last two pannels arn't goung to make sence and thats good.
"Finally, Issue #5 is up and the last two panels aren't going to make sense and that's good."
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nageto004
He gat sewed and gat an acheivement for it.
"He gotsued and got an achievement for it."
...actually, that spellcheck one goes for everyone here.
Thanks. I think your comic looks good, but it could be a whole lot better with some very small changes.
Last edited by EmeraldPhoenix : 07-21-2009 at 06:15 PM.
Spelling and grammar are very important to most comic readers. I recommend you get a beta reader. Either send them comics or just the dialogue before you post them, and in 12-24 hours they can get back to you with what you need to fix to make it grammar and spelling proper.
Nick, you really should let me read these before you post them, so many spelling errors...
__________________
I made comics!
Spoiler
My house of Kirbies
I made my avvie, Yay me! I can also make one for you! Why am I using so many exclamation points?! I don't know! MOAR EXCLAMATION POINTS!!!!!!!!!!
My Awards:
Okay, please add some extra panels in between. I can't tell the difference between when he's walking and moving around when the background/angle changes. Is that a different portal? Different room? I'm totally lost as to where all of this is going.
Spellcheck should be default on everything you use; it's not very hard to right click it and select the one you want, unless you don't know the difference between similar-sounding words that are spelled differently (IE the difference between They're, Their, and There), in which case we might have a problem... If that's the case, sou should probably consider taking some elementary school courses online, if you can find any.
Finally, the jokes seem... Random. Most of the references I either don't notice, or understand but lack understanding of the joke. It's kind of hard to follow everything.
__________________
Try to find the subtle pun in my name.
No, don't give me that. You did not already find it!
Finally, the jokes seem... Random. Most of the references I either don't notice, or understand but lack understanding of the joke. It's kind of hard to follow everything.
Thats the point also new comic. Last one before school starts.
__________________
I am a Neutral Good Human Wizard (1st Level)
Without evil there can be no good so it must be good to be evil some times.
I'll be honest; I don't understand anything about what the hell's going on, and I don't get the jokes, which makes me not want to continue reading. The spelling also puts me off. I can respect that you might not be great at writing, but in this day and age with all of the spell-checkers out there, and the ease of finding a beta-reader, there's really no excuse.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Nageto004
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tired N' Drowzy
Finally, the jokes seem... Random. Most of the references I either don't notice, or understand but lack understanding of the joke. It's kind of hard to follow everything.
Thats the point also new comic. Last one before school starts.
Yeah, that's a REALLY bad way to get regular readers.
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, but it seems he is smiling.
- Hi, my name is Smallwink and I'll be your signature for the evening!
