Silly Message Board GamesA forum for any kind of quote games, continuing story games, "What would you do if?" games, or whatever anyone comes up with. Old threads will now expire after one month.
1181: I may not, as the GM of a Star Wars campaign, tape the people and/or technology, ships, weapons, cylons, etc, of Battlestar Galactica onto the Star Wars galaxy at will, especially if calling them Galacticans or not warning the party in advance.
1182:I also, as a GM, of any type of campaign, may not make the slang term "bro" a part of any main character's name. As a general rule, I should avoid making the term "bro" a part of any character's name, at least unless I can disguise it to the point where most people would not notice.
Our SWSE GM is doing this right now, and there's evidently going to be a whole story arc based on the Galacticans. Their leader's name is Chee Brodama -.-. In addition, they evidently have EMP grenades, rendering the lightsabers and blasters of half the party useless.
1183: just because our party includes a warforged that still doesn't have a name doesn't mean I get keep him to name him "Clunky".
1183a:even if this one does has a -10 penalty on dexterity-based checks, no exceptions.
1184: I may not make a living off selling corpses to necromancers in the free market.
1185: I may NOT accept an epic quest just to redirect it to a different adventuring party "who just happen to have a few leftover GP."
1186: The final battle between me and my arch nemesis may NOT be in the form of a challenging game of Monopoly.
1187: A dragon is a suitably fine rival to face in combat for your average 9th level adventuring party. a Great Wyrm Prismatic Dragon with 29 levels in druid - is not.
1188: As a player - my character may not buy the same pre-made-adventure book the DM is currently using.
__________________ Thanks to Ceika, Vamber lives to play with fire in this cheerful avatar!
You can call me by my username, or Zahn, or PZ, I would appreciate you not deviating from the given.
Games currently playing:
1192 I am no longer allowed to attempt Inception
1193 ever
1194 I am no longer allowed to play a 6 year old sorcerer.
1194 Nor can I play someone with multiple personality disorder and an irrational fear of the color yellow.
1196: I may not cast a spell on a nuclear warhead and then claim that it's a Magic Missile.
1197: I may not refer to my half-halfling party member as a quarterling.
1198: I may not use a pen as a weapon and then claim that I have to beat every enemy I come across because the pen is mightier than the sword.
1199: "A La Peanut Butter Sandwiches" is not a spell.
1200: It is not appropriate for my bard to sing "Another One Bites the Dust" if my side is losing. Actually, it's not appropriate for my bard to sing that at any time.
Quote:
Originally Posted by dr.ebhan
1194 Nor can I play someone with multiple personality disorder and an irrational fear of the color yellow.
Is that a reference to The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-Time?
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BRC gave me this commiepuppy. Thanks!
Timeless Error stole all the things that I could possibly be mistaken for. *happy dances*
I made my avatar. If you want to see other stuff I made, click here.
Last edited by Groundhog : 04-22-2011 at 11:50 AM.
1201, I am not allowed to challenge the Grim Reaper to a wet t-shirt contest to win my freedom
1202, I am not allowed to challenge the Grim Reaper to Calvinball to win my freedom
1203, I am not allowed to challenge the Grim Reaper to highest number to win my freedom
1203a, not even if i let him go first
1204, I am not allowed to say 'All your base are belong to us' when raiding a dungeon
1205, I am not allowed to move zig
1205a, not even for great justice
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She never said any of those things
1210：I'm not allowed to play a Bard dressed like a cowboy.
1210a: Especially if his instrument is a harmonica.
1210b: Even more especially if he only plays "Clementine."
1211. I am not allowed to play a character who fills up the entire alignment chart on his own.
1211a. Especially if he manages to do it in a single game session.
1211b, Especially if he manages to do it in a single game session, every game session.
1212, I am not allowed to summon a skeleton, give him a cloak and then trick people into thinking me and the Grim Reaper are best buds
1212a, not even if i take him to an amusement park
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She never said any of those things
1213. I may not have my cleric start a holy war. Not even if it benefits my fellow PC's.
1213a. I may not try and convince the DM that my cleric starting a holy war would benefit my fellow PC's.
1214. I may not use Baleful Polymorph on my fellow PC's.
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BRC gave me this commiepuppy. Thanks!
Timeless Error stole all the things that I could possibly be mistaken for. *happy dances*
I made my avatar. If you want to see other stuff I made, click here.
Here are a couple of things that are banned in my RP group:
1215. I may not play a Bugbear who dualwields Goblins that dualwield Flails.
1216. The correct course of action when faced with a man who holds a dead-man's-switch to the explosives in the entire room is not to shoot him with a shotgun. Twice.
1217. Dominate Person is not a date-rape drug, and should not be used as such.
1218. I am no longer allowed to make a MnM character who can survive orbital descent and subsequent crash, bullets, rockets, poison, radiation, decapitation, disembowelment or a strategic nuclear strike.
1218a. May not use said character as an orbital-drop kinetic weapon, even if he can increase his mass to ten thousand pounds.
1219. I do may not own a goblin slave for the odd blood sacrifice, trap deactivation or emergency food.
1220. I am no longer allowed to place a Bag of Holding inside a Bag of Holding.
1221. I can not craft the Portal Gun.
1222: I am not allowed to use magic advertisements trying to prove that magic isn't real
1223: I am not allowed to say I survive being beaten tortured, shot and stabbed just because my character's name is Rasputin, but Chuck Norris still applies
1223a: (Next day) No it doesn't
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She never said any of those things
Last edited by PerfectPhantom : 04-25-2011 at 12:29 AM.
1224: I can not play any character based on a Samuel L. Jackson role.
1225: Or Adam Baldwin.
1226: My wizard may neither refer to himself as Batman nor be named Bruce, no matter my spell selection.
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Delightfully abrasive in more ways than one
Spoiler
Quote:
Originally Posted by Recaiden
This is Demon King Mangosta talking. Of course he's harsh.
1227: I cannot the concept for a dungeon from another game.
1227a: especially of most/all of my players have played that game.
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once, we accepted that everything was the way it was, and that was enough for us. now, we question our own existance. clearly, we are approaching a problem. what if, in our quest to determine whether we are real, we find that we are not?
1228) I am no longer allowed to play any character above 9th level without some kind of item to increase my saving throws.
1228a) I am no longer allowed to play any class that does not have good saves.
1229) Under no circumstances may I engage anything that might have a prismatic attack, especially when I'm using the one d20 that I own.
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Avatar by the incomparable Herpestidae.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flickerdart
Fortunately, a Monk 1/Warblade 19 uses Iron Heart Surge to end the Monk character class, and the day is saved.
(1233) -- When in solo combat against superior numbers of superior foes, my escape strategy cannot be to quick-draw a Deck of Many Things and draw a card.
(1233a) -- When in solo combat against superior numbers of superior foes, my escape strategy cannot be to "52 card pickup" the entire Deck of Many Things at my foes.
(1233b) -- I am explicitly forbidden from owning a Deck of Many Things.
(1234) -- I am no longer allowed to use the abilities of Master of Many Forms to disguise myself as an ogre, take over the ogre kingdom and become the Ogre King, forge a pact between the ogres and giants, or use said pact to lead an army the likes of which noone has seen in order to completely annihilate the human kingdom whose throne is rightfully mine (and am destroying out of spite).
(1234b) -- I am no longer allowed to play a Master of Many Forms.
(1235) -- I am not allowed to create a custom mechanika item that is basically a gun that shoots unstable batteries.
(1235a) -- I am not allowed to create a custom mechanika item that is basically a gun that shoots soul cages.
(1235b) -- I am not allowed to create a custom clockwork item that is basically the exo-suit loader from Aliens.
(1235c) -- I am not allowed to mount the aforementioned guns to the arms of the aforementioned exo-suit.
(1235d) -- I am not allowed to play an Arcane Mechanik.
(1236) -- I am not allowed to play a Xexto Jedi Guardian that quad-wields lightsabers.
(1236a) -- I am not allowed to play a Xexto Trooper that quad-wields heavy blaster pistols.
(1236b) -- I am not allowed to play Xexto characters at all.
(1236c) -- I am not allowed to play any race that has more than two arms.
(1236d) -- I am not allowed to play any race that has more than two appendages that are used for anything other than movement.
(1237) -- I cannot hide the last known bottle of tainted zombifying whiskey in the hopes of causing a zombie apocalypse at an undetermined point in the future.
(1238) -- While under the effects of bibliophobia, I am prohibited from entering any school, university, or library.
(1238a) -- While under the effects of bibliophobia, I am prohibited from carrying anything that produces an open flame.
(1238b) -- I am not allowed to read books that are bound in human skin.
1239: I am not allowed to summon Cthulhu
1240: I'm not allowed to summon anything from the Necromonicon
1241: I'm not allowed to do anything in the Necromonicon
1242: I'm not allowed to read the Necromonicon
(Imagine these as one day after the last)
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She never said any of those things
1243 I'm not allowed to play a gay centaur barbarian.
1243a I'm not allowed to play a centaur
1243b or any creature that is large
1243c or has powerful build
1243d or is gay
1243e or has sex with orcs
1243f and eats the meat.
1244 I'm not allowed to create a weapon out of the spine of anything, no matter how much sense it would make
1245 I'm not allowed to use the profession skill
1246 I'm not allowed to by adventuring equipment that can be used as weapons, especially not shovels
1247 I'm not allowed to use detect evil to ruin the DM's entire plot
1247a or even to reveal a succubus
1247b or hump said succubus to death
1248 I am no longer allowed to play anyone else's character, even if it is what they would actually do
1249 I am no longer allowed to be the primary spellcaster, primary healer, and leader as a bard
1249a In fact, I am not allowed to be the party leader if I am a bard
1250 Bards are not sorcerers who manifest their powers through music, and under no circumstances can I convince the DM of this
1250a I am not allowed to suggest anything to the DM's girlfriend
1251 I am not allowed to win a grapple check against a paladin two sizes larger than myself to chase after cute gnome chicks. Not even if its in character.
1252 I am not allowed to use polymorph spells to be an animal that is riding another animal of its own species.
1252a I am not allowed to use polymorph spells period. Especially not on other PC's in their sleep. Especially not to cow
1252b The school of transformation is forever banned for me.
1253 I am not to take Weapon Focus: Rod of Wonders
1253a I am not allowed to have the Rod of wonders
1253b The Rod of wonders does not, has not, and will never exist.
1254. I'm not allowed to kill the BBEG by throwing badgers
1254a I'm not allowed to kill the BBEG with airborne summoned animals period
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Stay tuned here for current updating status
I regret that I am actually busier during the summer than otherwise, plus the forums keep popping up error messages on me, so posting has been difficult for me. I'm trying.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MesiDoomstalker
Thread won! I don't think I have the authority to do that but whatever
1255:I am not allowed to make up a class just so I can be more awesome
1255a: I am not allowed to combine classes to make new ones
1255b: I am not allowed to change classes in the middle of a game saying that it is a class ability to be able to change to said class in the middle of a game
1255c; I'm not allowed to pretend to have a fit when I am denied said class in the middle of a game
1256: I am not allowed to catch enemies in round, physics-defying objects
1256a: Not even if it's a Master Ball
__________________
She never said any of those things
1256: I am not allowed to shrink myself to the point of invisibility with magic or technology so I can plant foreign objects inside the body of the enemy leader undetected, resulting in his death when they rip him apart from the inside when the effect ends.
1256-a: I am also not allowed to shrink myself and plant shrunken explosives inside the enemy leader's body so I can detonate them all remotely (while still shrunken) and kill him via internal bleeding.
1257 - My first action after realising I got transported to the Warhammer 40K universe is not to shoot myself.
1258 - No longer allowed to attach grenades to a jeep with duct tape, remove the pins then charge the alien ship at full speed.
1259 - The right thing to do when faced with surrendering enemies is not always to kill them so there won't be any witnesses.
1260 - My kobold warblade wielding a pick cannot act like Kamina.
1261 - I can talk both out of character and in character with my own voice, it is not necessary to have them both different. Especially when both are different from my normal voice.
1262 - No longer allowed to go fishing with a flamethrower. Or a greataxe.
1263 - If I don't have any Use vehicle (space) ranks, won't volunteer to fly the shuttle.
1264 - Laser shotguns do not exist.
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Bugfalcon and banner drawn by me.
Quote:
Originally Posted by JGoldenberg
you would make an awesome propagandist for Kobolds.
1265: No matter how much gunpowder I take, diamond I mine or any other materials I use, I cannot make a diamond shotgun simply because I saw it in a youtube video
1266: I can no longer drive any vehicles because I keep trying things I saw in movies
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She never said any of those things
1267. I am not allowed to refer other RPG players to this thread.
1267a. Particularly if their DM is unaware of this thread.
1267b. Especially if said player is in the same campaign as myself and we're atempting to use ideas from this thread to see how quickly we can make the DM BSOD.
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Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG
