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256. The elf wizard will not be involved in a drinking contest because alcohol and magic don't mix.
257. Any loss of property incurred by disobeying 256 will not be paid for by dominating other party members into working it off.
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Quote:
"To play a fighter is to play the game.
To play a wizard is to understand the rules.
To understand the rules, and play a fighter, is to understand the game."
-Lycar
Neutral Good Elf Druid/Cleric (1st/1st Level) Futhark rune by Icewalker.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dragonprime
Wouldn't a bulb only be sharp if someone broke it? Oh...wait...that's actually very fitting for this situation. Well played Ranger Mattos. Your metaphor-crafting is masterful indeed.
Last edited by Ranger Mattos : 02-20-2010 at 12:59 PM.
161--I cannot do a dance in place of a Bluff check
162--I cannot buy items in the middle of a dungeon crawl
163--I cannot sneak attack a ninja
164--I cannot watch TV in the middle of a dungeon crawl
165--I cannot spot a ninja in less than low-light
166--I cannot poke a guard, then proceed to stab him in the face.
167--I cannot be listening to heavy metal while making a move silently check.
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78% of DM's started their first campaign in a tavern. If you're one of the 22% that didn't, copy and paste this into your signature.
Where did you start yours?
I started mine with my party investigating a disturbance at a ruined temple of the gods.
278. I am not allowed to let the others in my party eat each other
278. I am not permitted to allow the others in my party to sit down in front of a raging monster and eat moldy bread
279. I am not allowed to mention Bob the Undead Barbarian
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Thank you Tiffanie Lirle for the totally awesome avatar!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mee
So? This is the town. We don't listen to the laws of reality.
We rewrote it for our own convenience.
Neutral Good Elf Druid/Cleric (1st/1st Level) Futhark rune by Icewalker.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dragonprime
Wouldn't a bulb only be sharp if someone broke it? Oh...wait...that's actually very fitting for this situation. Well played Ranger Mattos. Your metaphor-crafting is masterful indeed.
283 When a party member is dying on -9, I will not 'drown him back to 0'.
284 I will not immediately slaughter the town guards if they charge me 2 silver pieces for a legal road toll.
285 I will not complain that the chances of hitting an enemy 10ft away with a longbow is exactly the same as hitting him 100ft away.
286 When in parley, I will actually negotiate with the leader of the enemy army instead of killing him as soon as he steps foward.
287 As a DM, I will refrain from attacking the PC's with fiendish Shocker Lizards riding on Shambling Mounds.
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EVIL. A growth industry "We're ALWAYS Hiring"
"You have a duty, Belkar. A duty to serve the Greater You.
Saving a life, though regrettable, is a small price to pay for a whole lifetime of unfettered killing."
- Belkar's Conscience
Last edited by Mordeus_Dire : 03-01-2010 at 10:13 PM.
289: i am not allowed to make sneak attacks with my severed arm, especially on the monster the monster that bit it off in the first thing.
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sometimes you just want to play something completely overpowered and kill things, other times you want to play a bard with a point-buy 18...
290: I am not allowed to throw the unconious cleric at the vampire and make the arguement that the vamp should take damage because the cleric is a "holy item."
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Owen Brainstomper
What do you mean its my turn to feed the Cold Ones?
290: I am not allowed to throw the unconious cleric at the vampire and make the arguement that the vamp should take damage because the cleric is a "holy item."
I think that if anybody did this in any of the groups I've been in they'd get bonus RP XP. There was a president for other party members being improvised weapons after all. Which leads me to:
291: I am no longer allowed to list "Kitsune Bard" in the weapons field of my character sheets.
292: "FLYING KITSUNE BARD!" is not an appropriate battle cry for a Warlock, even if I can fly and am strong enough to lift/carry/throw the Kitsune Bard.
293: A person who shall remain nameless is no longer allowed to play a Kitsune Bard, or anything that my character could possibly pick up.
__________________ This is far more fun than it has any right to be. This is what I have in mind when building a character.
Last edited by Ishcumbeebeeda : 03-03-2010 at 04:29 AM.
294. I cannot play an Archangel/Eladrin Paladin.
295. I can't play a Paladin/Rogue just for the Sneak Attacks.
296. I am not allowed to have the Cake be a lie.
297. I can't make an Athletics check to hit harder to a foe, with a +30 bonus to that Athletics.
298. I cannot teabag my dead foes.
299. I cannot imitate Nelson when an ally is bloodied. HA-HA!
300. I can't go into a city ready for war and shout "THIS! IS! SPARTA!"
301: I can't have a Spartan birthed for war, over the other 300.
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I love reading Rosario + Vampire! Accounts
Neutral Good Elf Druid/Cleric (1st/1st Level) Futhark rune by Icewalker.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dragonprime
Wouldn't a bulb only be sharp if someone broke it? Oh...wait...that's actually very fitting for this situation. Well played Ranger Mattos. Your metaphor-crafting is masterful indeed.
304: i can no longer play as a litch named eddie. \m/
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sometimes you just want to play something completely overpowered and kill things, other times you want to play a bard with a point-buy 18...
308. I am not allowed to play Arthur Dent
309. especially in a fantasy setting
310. I am no longer allowed to use zombies to freak out the cops in Scion.
311. Nor am I allowed to initiate a pissing contest with Titanspawn
312. I am no longer allowed to build a Halfling ballista to break siege. especially when I don't have the Halfling's permission.
313: I cannot use one of my teammates as a improvised weapon.
314: I cannot say "The Cake is a lie!... But Pie isn't."
315: In a sci-fi setting, I cannot make a blue-skinned who runs around in his underwear and is named Freakazoid
316: I cannot make Freakazoid in a time period before computers.
317: I cannot ask the guys in the middle of a battle if they want to go for a snowcone.
318: I cannot make a villain named Candle Jack
319: I will never sa
320. I may not start a romantic relationship with the BBEG.
321. If 320 is broken, I may not attempt a sexual encounter.
322. Especially if the BBEG is a nonhumanoid.
323. I may not make references to SWAIM during an encounter.
328: I can't be a Paladin of Freedom/bard/sorcerer/rogue.
329: I can't integrate RuneScape into the campaign.
330: I can't play Master Chief in the games.
331: I can't submit my ideas. Trust me, you shouldn't want to know
332: My DM won't let me use my +56 Diplomacy.
333: I can't divide 999 by 3 for this "2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG" thing.
334: The crossbow can't be loaded with bullets.
335: I can't do an Acrobatics check to avoid an attack skillfully.
336: I can't have my character end up doing everything. Even if the other players agree.
337: I can't houserule Smite Evil to my character.
338: Detect Evil is something I should never use in a 3.5 game. (Which is rare for me to play)
339: Will Defense is not "will defend"
340: Fortitude is not a crunched word of "Fortress of Solitude".
341: I can't use Kryptonite for a weapon.
342: I can't brag about getting a Bonus Feat at 1st level should I play a Human.
343: 343 Guilty Spark can't be used as a boss.
344: I can't substitute a Roleplaying Game with a Rocket-Propelled Grenade.
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I love reading Rosario + Vampire! Accounts
345: I am not allowed to call shots to turn arrows into bashing damage by firing another arrow at them to flip them around
346: Before fighting an abyssal, I am not allowed to set my ipod to My Chemical Romance.
347: I am not allowed to call shots and stun to turn people into eunuchs
348: I am not allowed to quote Gurren Lagann when delivering a dramatic speech
349: I am then not allowed to make an artefact battle drill and a war strider
350: If I create another war strider, I am not allowed to use moonsilver to combine the two.
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Re: 2000 things I'm not allowed to do in an RPG
Futhark rune by Icewalker.
"We're ALWAYS Hiring"
by Thecrimsonmage and 
By Shades of Gray 
by Akrim.elf
and current made by me.
