Homebrew DesignRoll up your sleeves and get working: there's lots of homebrewin' to be done! Post your custom creation for critiques or review those of your peers.
Hello all again. This time, I'm taking a walk on the good side, and doing a two-fold homebrew project. There are no angelic paragons, and due to certain restrictions, I can't use archangels, so I'm creating both angelic paragons and PrCs for those from whole cloth. This is the third of the bunch, the Ascendant Fury of Tresanerva! Fluff for the angelic paragon coming soon, but I'll start with the basics now.
Spoiler
Within the depths of Nidavellir, the lowest layer of Ysgard, nestled in a realm of brilliantly veined rock, lies the Hall of Righteous Vindication. Within this hall dwell many angels and eladrin, all who make a solemn vow, to never use their wings in battle unless in a need to aid others. This vow is taken before Tresanerva, the paragon of the Ysgard angels and a recent ascendant to the position. Tresanerva remembers her time as a mortal, and the good done by walking among those you help, and so wishes her angels to learn to walk as most mortals do, to feel their fatigue and their strength.
Tresanerva stands 12 feet tall, with dark brown skin covered in sharp obsidian blades and spikes inset with sparkling quartz-like gems. Her hair is jet, streaked with fiery orange red, a holdover from her time in the mortal realm, and she carries a harp strapped to her back. Her wings are almost always neatly folded behind her back, and she usually dresses in the courtly garb of a lady of Ysgard, wearing fine dresses and rich furs.
In addition to repelling invasion by the slaad from Limbo and demons from lower planes, Tresanerva is set with the task of watching the elemental planes, ensuring no trouble comes from the elemental or para-elemental planes, and sharing the responsibility with Peoneir to watch the quasi-elemental planes. Recently Tresanerva has attempted to receive a visit from Peoneir to her realm in order to gain the brilliantly intelligent angel's aid in deciphering a connection between Limbo's raw chaos and the elemental planes.
The gods of Ysgard, Olidammra and Kord, as well as the Asgardian pantheon, all consider Tresanerva to be company of the finest sort. Olidammra invites her to his manse to hear her compositions of music and match riddling wits, while Kord seeks the competition of an angel who is willing to stow her wings, running foot-races and performing feats of strength. She is no match for either of these gods in their realms, but she is always gracious in defeat, and she loves to test petitioners of both gods as well. Among the Asgardians, she is closest with Thor and Sif, though her relationship with both has become strained of late due to her recent friendships struck with both Surtur and Thyrm. Like her other angelic bretheren, she believes in the goodness in the hearts of these gods, who like their mortal subjects were once great, but have been villainized and harried by others.
Tresanerva is also the only one of the current angelic paragons to have taken a consort, a shiradi eladrin bard by the name of Hasifvyn. He rules in her hall when she is making appearances at the halls of the Ysgard gods, and trains her monadic deva guard while she is present in her halls. Many poems and songs have been composed about their courtship and love, many of them written by the two themselves, and it is rumoured that they are two souls who were in love in mortal life, reunited in the celestial realms.
Tresanerva's mortal order concerns itself with battling those who steal secretly into the lives and homes of decent folk, earning them no love from doppelgangers, lycanthropes and the rakshasa. Those who threaten lives, homes and crops are dealt with as swiftly as possible, keeping those that can be spared alive. Though the shapechanging metallic dragons do not share the order of Tresanerva's ethical outlook, they are more than willing to aid this group, both to further goodness and to deflect the more radical in the order from turning their eyes to the great gold, silver and bronze beasts. Rebellion is also the purview of the order, and those that seek to oppress a population soon find themselves facing the unarmed masters who call themselves the furies. The only mandate of the order besides seeking those who walk among decent folk cloaked is the defeat of evil creatures. Though the order revels in the defeat of fiends, when a fury encounters an evil non-outsider, the fury must show mercy to the creature, whether it be a lowly orc or a mighty beholder, knowing that Tresanerva teaches that all creatures can be redeemed. Tresanerva's symbol is black spiked fist, often obsidian, though some members of the order have symbols made from jet, onyx or a more mundane black stone.
Fury of Tresanerva
Requirements
To qualify to become a fury of Tresanerva, a character must fulfill all the following criteria.
Alignment: Any good
Base Attack: +5
Skills: Knowledge (religion) 4 ranks
Feats: Acolyte of the Archangels (Tresanerva), Improved Unarmed Strike, Power Attack
Language: Auran, Aquan, Ignan or Terran
Fury of Tresanerva
hit dice:d12
Level
Base Attack Bonus
Fort Save
Ref Save
Will Save
Special
1st
+1
+2
+0
+0
Brawler training, strike the horizon
2nd
+2
+3
+0
+0
Body of obsidian
3rd
+3
+3
+1
+1
Honur challenge: righteous challenge
4th
+4
+4
+1
+1
Veins of silver
5th
+5
+4
+1
+1
Fires of Muspelheim
6th
+6
+5
+2
+2
Flecked with iron, honour challenge: test of mettle
7th
+7
+5
+2
+2
Healing waters
8th
+8
+6
+2
+2
Aquifer of stilled water
9th
+9
+6
+3
+3
Honour challenge: mighty challenge
10th
+10
+7
+3
+3
Reinforced with adamantine
Class Skills
The fury of Tresanerva’s class skills (and the key ability for each skill) are Balance (Dex), Bluff (Cha), Climb (Str), Diplomacy (Cha), Escape Artist (Dex), Intimidate (Cha), Jump (Str), Knowledge (religion) (Int), Listen (Wis), Sense Motive (Wis), Spot (Wis), Swim (Str), and Tumble (Dex)
Skill Points
4 + Int modifier
Monk Training: Levels in fury of Tresanerva count as levels in monk for determining unarmed strike damage and flurry of blows progression, as well as AC bonus. If the fury of Tresanerva has no levels in monk, she is treated as a monk of her class level.
Strike the Horizon: A fury of Tresanerva can make unarmed strikes at a distance, forcing the air forward with her attacks to strike her foes. Her attacks have a range increment of 10 feet, with a maximum distance of 10 feet per fury of Tresanerva level. This is considered a ranged attack, and provokes an attack of opportunity.
Body of Obsidian: When she is not wearing armour heavier than light, a 2nd level fury of Tresanerva can at will grow spurs of obsidian out of her body, similar to the obsidian that covers Tresanerva. These spurs can be projected or retracted as a move action, and while they are out the fury is treated as wearing spiked armour. The damage die for the fury’s unarmed strikes becomes one size category larger, and all damage becomes slashing damage.
Honour Challenge: A fury of Tresanerva’s dauntless fighting spirit plays a major role in her fighting style, as important as the strength of her arm or the sharpness of her blade. In battle, a fury of Tresanerva uses the force of her personality to challenge her enemies. A fury of Tresanerva can call out a foe, shouting a challenge that boosts her confidence, or issue a general challenge that strikes fear into weak opponents and compels strong opponents to seek her out for personal combat. By playing on the enemies' ego, a fury of Tresanerva can manipulate her foes.
A fury of Tresanerva can use this ability a number of times per day equal to her class level + her Charisma bonus (minimum once per day). As a fury of Tresanerva gain levels, she gains a number of options that she can use in conjunction with this ability.
Even if a fury of Tresanerva and her foes lack a shared language, she can still effectively communicate through body language, tone, and certain oaths and challenges she has learned from a variety of different tongues.
Spoiler
Righteous Challenge (Ex): As a swift action, a 3rd level fury of Tresanerva can issue a challenge against a single opponent. The target of this ability must have an Intelligence of 5 or higher, have a language of some sort, and have a CR greater than or equal to the fury of Tresanerva’s character level minus 2. If it does not meet these requirements, a use of this ability is expended without effect.
If the target does meet the conditions given above, the fury of Tresanerva gains a sacred bonus on Will saves and attack rolls and damage rolls against the target of this ability equal to half her class level. A fury of Tresanerva fights with renewed vigor and energy by placing her honor and reputation on the line. If the fury of Tresanervar’s chosen foe reduces her to 0 or fewer hit points, she loses two uses of her honour challenge ability for the day because of the blow to her ego and confidence from this defeat.
The effect of a fighting challenge lasts for a number of rounds equal to 5 + the fury of Tresanerva’s Charisma bonus (if any).
If a fury of Tresanerva is capable of issuing an honour challenge more than once per day, the fury of Tresanerva can use her ability more than once in a single encounter. If a fury of Tresanerva’s first chosen foe is defeated or flees the area, she can issue a new challenge to a different foe. A fury of Tresanerva cannot switch foes if her original target is still active.
Test of Mettle (Ex): Starting at 6th level, a fury of Tresanerva can shout a challenge to all enemies, calling out for the mightiest among them to face her in combat. Any target of her ability must have a language of some sort and an Intelligence score of 5 or higher. Creatures that do not meet these requirements are immune to the test of mettle. A fury of Tresanerva must have line of sight and line of effect to the targets of her ability.
As a swift action, a fury of Tresanerva can expend one use of her honour challenge ability to cause all her enemies within 100 feet with a CR greater than or equal to her character level minus 2 to make Will saves (DC 10 + 1/2 her fury of Tresanerva class level + Cha modifier). Creatures that fail their save are forced to attack the fury of Tresanerva with their ranged or melee attacks in preference over other available targets. If a foe attacks by casting a spell or using a supernatural ability, he must target the fury of Tresanerva with the attack or include the fury of Tresanerva in the effect's area.
An opponent compelled to act in ther manner is not thrown into a mindless rage and does not have to move to attack a fury of Tresanerva in melee if doing so would provoke attacks of opportunity against him. In such a case, he can use ranged attacks against a fury of Tresanerva or attack any opponents he threatens as normal. If anyone other than a fury of Tresanerva attacks the target, the effect of the test of mettle ends for that specific target.
If the fury of Tresanerva is reduced to 0 or fewer hit points by an opponent forced to attack a fury of Tresanerva due to this ability, a fury of Tresanerva gain one additional use of a fury of Tresanervar knight's challenge ability for that day. This additional use comes from increased confidence and the knowledge that a fury of Tresanerva has proved her mettle against her enemies by calling out foes even against overwhelming odds. This additional use disappears if the fury of Tresanerva has not used it by the start of the next day. A fury of Tresanerva can only gain one additional use of a fury of Tresanervar knight's challenge ability in this manner per day.
The effect of a test of mettle lasts for a number of rounds equal to 5 + the fury of Tresanerva’s Charisma bonus (if any). Whether a creature fails or succeeds on its save against a fury of Tresanervar test of mettle, it can only be targeted by this effect once per day.
Mighty Challenge (Ex): Starting at 9th level, a fury of Tresanerva can call out opponents, striking fear into the hearts of her enemies. In this manner a fury of Tresanerva separates the strong-minded from the weak-willed, allowing her to focus on opponents that are worthy foes.
As a swift action, a fury of Tresanerva can expend one use of her honour challenge ability to issue a daunting challenge. This ability affects all creatures within 100 feet of her that have a CR less than her level minus 2. Targets must be able to hear the fury of Tresanerva, speak or understand a language of some sort, and have an Intelligence score of 5 or more. All targets who meet these conditions must make Will saves (DC 10 + 1/2 the fury of Tresanerva’s class level + her Cha modifier) or become panicked. Those who succeed are shaken.
Whether a creature fails or succeeds on its save against a fury of Tresanerva’s daunting challenge, it can only be targeted by this effect once per day.
Veins of Silver: At 4th level, while her obsidian spurs are out, a fury of Tresanerva’s unarmed strikes are treated as silver for the purpose of overcoming damage reduction. Also, when the fury is damaged by the natural attacks of a creature whose damage reduction is wholly or partially overcome by silver, the attack creature must make a Fortitude save (DC 10+fury of Tresanerva level+ the fury’s Con modifier) or become sickened. This effect occurs even if the obsidian spurs are not out.
Fires of Muspelheim: Once per day, a 5th level fury of Tresanerva can work herself up into a rage. In a rage, a fury temporarily gains a +4 bonus to Strength, a +4 bonus to Dexterity, and a +2 morale bonus on Will saves, but she takes a -2 penalty to Armor Class. While raging, a fury cannot use any Charisma-, Dexterity-, or Intelligence-based skills (except for Balance, Escape Artist, Intimidate, and Ride), the Concentration skill, or any abilities that require patience or concentration, nor can she cast spells or activate magic items that require a command word, a spell trigger (such as a wand), or spell completion (such as a scroll) to function. She can use any feat she has except Combat Expertise, item creation feats, and metamagic feats. A fit of rage lasts for a number of rounds equal to 3 + the fury’s Constitution modifier. A fury may prematurely end her rage. At the end of the rage, the fury loses the rage modifiers and restrictions and becomes fatigued (-2 penalty to Strength, -2 penalty to Dexterity, can’t charge or run) for the duration of the current encounter.
In addition, while raging the fury deals extra fire damage on all her attacks equal to half her class level.
Flecked with Iron: At 6th level, while her obsidian spurs are out, a fury of Tresanerva’s unarmed strikes are treated as cold iron and silver for the purpose of overcoming damage reduction. Also, when targeted by a mind-affecting effect by a creature whose damage reduction is wholly or partially overcome by cold iron, a fury of Tresanerva can make two saving throws and choose which one to use. This effect occurs even if the obsidian spurs are not out.
Healing Waters: A 7th level fury of Tresanerva with a Charisma score of 12 or higher can heal wounds (her own or those of others) by touch. Each day she can heal a total number of hit points of damage equal to her fury of Tresanerva level × her Charisma bonus x 10. A fury of Tresanerva may choose to divide her healing among multiple recipients, and she doesn’t have to use it all at once. Using healing waters is a standard action.
Alternatively, a fury can use any or all of this healing power to deal damage to undead creatures. Using healing waters in this way requires a successful melee touch attack and doesn’t provoke an attack of opportunity, but only deals half damage. The fury decides how many of her daily allotment of points to use as damage after successfully touching an undead creature.
Aquifer of Stilled Water: At 8th level, while her obsidian spurs are out, a fury of Tresanerva’s unarmed strikes are treated as lawful-aligned, cold iron and silver for the purpose of overcoming damage reduction. Also, when using her honour challenge ability against a creature whose damage reduction is wholly or partially overcome by lawful-aligned weapons, the fury gains a sacred bonus to AC and damage equal to half her class level as long as she fights the target of her ability. This effect occurs even if the obsidian spurs are not out, and ends when the fury attacks a creature who is not the target.
Reinforced with Adamantine: At 10th level, while her obsidian spurs are out, a fury of Tresanerva’s unarmed strikes are treated as adamantine, good-aligned, cold iron and silver for the purpose of overcoming damage reduction. Also, when attacking a creature with damage reduction not overcome by the fury's obsidian spurs, if the fury would deal more damage than the target's damage reduction, the reduction does not apply to this attack, and the target's damage reduction is negated for 1d4 rounds. This effect occurs even if the obsidian spurs are not out.
And the Acolyte of the Archangels feat Acolyte of the Archangels (Tresanerva)[Exalted]
You swear fealty to Tresanerva, the paragon of rebellion and exposing evil. Benefit: Once per day you may make a touch attack against an opponent. If this touch attack hits, you deal no damage, but any illusions or transmutations used to disguise the opponent are dispelled. Special: Once you take this feat, you may not take it again, nor can you take either the Servant of the Heavens feat, Knight of the Stars or the Favored of the Companions feat. Your allegiance is only yours to give once.
__________________
Feel free to PM me if you want something PEACHed. I may not be one of the greats, but I'll do it if you ask.
"One of us is tender,
One of us is not,
One of us takes vengeance,
All four tied in a knot"
Hello all again. This time, I'm taking a walk on the good side, and doing a two-fold homebrew project. There are no angelic paragons, and due to certain restrictions, I can't use archangels, so I'm creating both angelic paragons and PrCs for those from whole cloth. This is the third of the bunch, the Ascendant Fury of Tresanerva! Fluff for the angelic paragon coming soon, but I'll start with the basics now.
Spoiler
Within the depths of Nidavellir, the lowest layer of Ysgard, nestled in a realm of brilliantly veined rock, lies the Hall of Righteous Vindication. Within this hall dwell many angels and eladrin, all who make a solemn vow, to never use their wings in battle unless in a need to aid others. This vow is taken before Tresanerva, the paragon of the Ysgard angels and a recent ascendant to the position. Tresanerva remembers her time as a mortal, and the good done by walking among those you help, and so wishes her angels to learn to walk as most mortals do, to feel their fatigue and their strength.
Tresanerva stands 12 feet tall, with dark brown skin covered in sharp obsidian blades and spikes inset with sparkling quartz-like gems. Her hair is jet, streaked with fiery orange red, a holdover from her time in the mortal realm, and she carries a harp strapped to her back. Her wings are almost always neatly folded behind her back, and she usually dresses in the courtly garb of a lady of Ysgard, wearing fine dresses and rich furs.
In addition to repelling invasion by the slaad from Limbo and demons from lower planes, Tresanerva is set with the task of watching the elemental planes, ensuring no trouble comes from the elemental or para-elemental planes, and sharing the responsibility with Peoneir to watch the quasi-elemental planes. Recently Tresanerva has attempted to receive a visit from Peoneir to her realm in order to gain the brilliantly intelligent angel's aid in deciphering a connection between Limbo's raw chaos and the elemental planes.
Tresanerva's mortal order concerns itself with battling those who steal secretly into the lives and homes of decent folk, earning them no love from doppelgangers, lycanthropes and the rakshasa. Those who threaten lives, homes and crops are dealt with as swiftly as possible, keeping those that can be spared alive. Though the shapechanging metallic dragons do not share the order of Tresanerva's ethical outlook, they are more than willing to aid this group, both to further goodness and to deflect the more radical in the order from turning their eyes to the great gold, silver and bronze beasts. Rebellion is also the purview of the order, and those that seek to oppress a population soon find themselves facing the unarmed masters who call themselves the furies. Tresanerva's symbol is black spiked fist, often obsidian, though some members of the order have symbols made from jet, onyx or a more mundane black stone.
12ft tall and made of mountain. Doesn't sound very angelic to me at all. This sounds like a nature spirit or one of the half assed attempts at fairies that Wizards are known for kicking out [see the court of stars...]
I'll work with what's here, however.
Quote:
Fury of Tresanerva
Requirements
To qualify to become a fury of Tresanerva, a character must fulfill all the following criteria.
Alignment: Any good
Base Attack: +5
Feats: Acolyte of the Archangels (Tresanerva), Power Attack
Language: Auran, Aquan, Ignan or Terran
Class Features: Dirty Fighting +2d6
It's in general not good practice to make a class accessible to only one base class; i know wizards did this, but there's really no good reason for it. Even the Fist of Raziel is accessible via non-paladins...
Prehaps opting for "Dirty Fighting +2d6, Hijutsu +2d6, Skirmish +2d6/+1" or something like that. If anything, reposte would work well with this class. Either that or removing the requirements and including the advancement of the Brawler in a spoiler so that the class advances it even if you didn't start with it.
Monk classes do, why not this?
Quote:
Fury of Tresanerva
hit dice:d12
Level
Base Attack Bonus
Fort Save
Ref Save
Will Save
Special
1st
+1
+2
+0
+0
Brawler training, strike the horizon
2nd
+2
+3
+0
+0
Body of obsidian
3rd
+3
+3
+1
+1
Honur challenge: fighting challenge
4th
+4
+4
+1
+1
Veins of silver
5th
+5
+4
+1
+1
Fires of Muspelheim
6th
+6
+5
+2
+2
Flecked with iron, honour challenge: test of mettle
7th
+7
+5
+2
+2
Healing waters
8th
+8
+6
+2
+2
Aquifer of holy water
9th
+9
+6
+3
+3
Honour challenge: daunting challenge
10th
+10
+7
+3
+3
Reinforced with adamantine
Class Skills
The fury of Tresanerva’s class skills (and the key ability for each skill) are Balance (Dex), Bluff (Cha), Climb (Str), Escape Artist (Dex), Intimidate (Cha), Jump (Str), Listen (Wis), Spot (Wis), Swim (Str), and Tumble (Dex)
Skill Points
4 + Int modifier
I'm not seeing Diplomacy or Sense Motive. They're pretty standard things for Exalted classes [the ability to at least TRY peace being a big factor in being exalted in the first place]. You're also lacking Knowledge [Religion], which should really be a prerequisite as well.
Quote:
Brawler Training: Levels in fury of Tresanerva count as levels in brawler in order to determine when a character gains Improved Unarmed Combat, Advanced Unarmed Combat, Greater Unarmed Combat, and Superior Unarmed Combat, as well as when she gains more Dirty Fighting dice.
Advancing a badly organised class. Mentioned this before. You'd be better off including the advancement of these in a spoiler or sticking with a core class: Despite myths, there's a table in Sword and Fist that proves mathematically that Flurry of Blows does actually increase your hit rate as long as you need less than a 17 to hit and more than an 8...
Quote:
Strike the Horizon: A fury of Tresanerva can make unarmed strikes at a distance, forcing the air forward with her attacks to strike her foes. Her attacks have a range increment of 10 feet, with a maximum distance of 10 feet per fury of Tresanerva level.
I take it that using this is a ranged attack with all this entails. I know of some players who would argue that because it's described as being a melee attack, it doesn't provoke Attacks of Opportunity. I think that would be a bad idea if that was the intent.
Quote:
Body of Obsidian: When she is not wearing armour heavier than light, a 2nd level fury of Tresanerva can at will grow spurs of obsidian out of her body, similar to the obsidian that covers Tresanerva. These spurs can be projected or retracted as a move action, and while they are out the fury is treated as wearing spiked armour. The damage die for the fury’s unarmed strikes becomes one size category larger, and all damage becomes slashing damage.
Ok, so we have a form of high temperature silicate metamorphic rock involved here. Armour spikes are a passable ability, though the increase in dice size is nice. Best include how this interacts with the daffier damage dice that the Brawler has [how the hell do you advance 2d10 for instance? It's not in the tables].
Quote:
Honour Challenge: A fury of Tresanerva’s dauntless fighting spirit plays a major role in her fighting style, as important as the strength of her arm or the sharpness of her blade. In battle, a fury of Tresanerva uses the force of her personality to challenge her enemies. A fury of Tresanerva can call out a foe, shouting a challenge that boosts her confidence, or issue a general challenge that strikes fear into weak opponents and compels strong opponents to seek her out for personal combat. By playing on the enemies' ego, a fury of Tresanerva can manipulate her foes.
A fury of Tresanerva can use this ability a number of times per day equal to her class level + her Charisma bonus (minimum once per day). As a fury of Tresanerva gain levels, she gains a number of options that she can use in conjunction with this ability.
Even if a fury of Tresanerva and her foes lack a shared language, she can still effectively communicate through body language, tone, and certain oaths and challenges she has learned from a variety of different tongues.
So it's the Knight's challenge ability...Ok...
Not that that's all that powerful as it is.
Quote:
Fighting Challenge (Ex): As a swift action, a 3rd level fury of Tresanerva can issue a challenge against a single opponent. The target of this ability must have an Intelligence of 5 or higher, have a language of some sort, and have a CR greater than or equal to the fury of Tresanerva’s character level minus 2. If it does not meet these requirements, a use of this ability is expended without effect.
If the target does meet the conditions given above, the fury of Tresanerva gains a +1 morale bonus on Will saves and a +1 morale bonus on attack rolls and damage rolls against the target of this ability. A fury of Tresanerva fights with renewed vigor and energy by placing her honor and reputation on the line. If the fury of Tresanervar’s chosen foe reduces her to 0 or fewer hit points, she loses two uses of her honour challenge ability for the day because of the blow to her ego and confidence from this defeat.
The effect of a fighting challenge lasts for a number of rounds equal to 5 + the fury of Tresanerva’s Charisma bonus (if any).
If a fury of Tresanerva is capable of issuing an honour challenge more than once per day, the fury of Tresanerva can use her ability more than once in a single encounter. If a fury of Tresanerva’s first chosen foe is defeated or flees the area, she can issue a new challenge to a different foe. A fury of Tresanerva cannot switch foes if her original target is still active.
Lame. Why would you use this, aside from the fact that like as not, you have nothing better to do with your swift action? It's a +1 bonus to a bonus category that you're already going to have better in if someone amongst your number is a Clerical caster or a Bard...
Waste of text space here.
Quote:
Test of Mettle (Ex): Starting at 6th level, a fury of Tresanerva can shout a challenge to all enemies, calling out for the mightiest among them to face her in combat. Any target of her ability must have a language of some sort and an Intelligence score of 5 or higher. Creatures that do not meet these requirements are immune to the test of mettle. A fury of Tresanerva must have line of sight and line of effect to the targets of her ability.
As a swift action, a fury of Tresanerva can expend one use of her honour challenge ability to cause all her enemies within 100 feet with a CR greater than or equal to her character level minus 2 to make Will saves (DC 10 + 1/2 her fury of Tresanerva class level + Cha modifier). Creatures that fail their save are forced to attack the fury of Tresanerva with their ranged or melee attacks in preference over other available targets. If a foe attacks by casting a spell or using a supernatural ability, he must target the fury of Tresanerva with the attack or include the fury of Tresanerva in the effect's area.
An opponent compelled to act in ther manner is not thrown into a mindless rage and does not have to move to attack a fury of Tresanerva in melee if doing so would provoke attacks of opportunity against him. In such a case, he can use ranged attacks against a fury of Tresanerva or attack any opponents he threatens as normal. If anyone other than a fury of Tresanerva attacks the target, the effect of the test of mettle ends for that specific target.
If the fury of Tresanerva is reduced to 0 or fewer hit points by an opponent forced to attack a fury of Tresanerva due to this ability, a fury of Tresanerva gain one additional use of a fury of Tresanervar knight's challenge ability for that day. This additional use comes from increased confidence and the knowledge that a fury of Tresanerva has proved her mettle against her enemies by calling out foes even against overwhelming odds. This additional use disappears if the fury of Tresanerva has not used it by the start of the next day. A fury of Tresanerva can only gain one additional use of a fury of Tresanervar knight's challenge ability in this manner per day.
The effect of a test of mettle lasts for a number of rounds equal to 5 + the fury of Tresanerva’s Charisma bonus (if any). Whether a creature fails or succeeds on its save against a fury of Tresanervar test of mettle, it can only be targeted by this effect once per day.
Interesting; is this what it does on the Knight? If so, i'd never noticed...
I actually like this one, though it does seem out of place on a volcano themed nutter. Will comment on this in a few class abilities time. Should be in the table.
Quote:
Daunting Challenge (Ex): Starting at 9th level, a fury of Tresanerva can call out opponents, striking fear into the hearts of her enemies. In this manner a fury of Tresanerva separates the strong-minded from the weak-willed, allowing her to focus on opponents that are worthy foes.
As a swift action, a fury of Tresanerva can expend one use of her honour challenge ability to issue a daunting challenge. This ability affects all creatures within 100 feet of her that have a CR less than her level minus 2. Targets must be able to hear the fury of Tresanerva, speak or understand a language of some sort, and have an Intelligence score of 5 or more. All targets who meet these conditions must make Will saves (DC 10 + 1/2 the fury of Tresanerva’s class level + her Cha modifier) or become shaken.
Whether a creature fails or succeeds on its save against a fury of Tresanerva’s daunting challenge, it can only be targeted by this effect once per day.
A -2 is very meh at this level, considering it's a fear effect... Very very meh. T'would be much better if it were able to make the "chaff," as you put it, flee like sissy girls, negating any need to harm them, but that's worth more than one challenge attempt, especially considering how pointless the first one is.
Quote:
Veins of Silver: At 4th level, while her obsidian spurs are out, a fury of Tresanerva’s unarmed strikes are treated as silver for the purpose of overcoming damage reduction. Also, when the fury is damaged by the natural attacks of a creature whose damage reduction is wholly or partially overcome by silver, the attack creature must make a Fortitude save (DC 10+fury of Tresanerva level+ the fury’s Con modifier) or become sickened. This effect occurs even if the obsidian spurs are not out.
It's at least intrusive ignius rock, i suppose. Obsidian and Silver are not found together, though that's just pedanticness. Like most such abilities, it feels like a, "DR silver shouldn't be a problem for high level adventurers! Winning without thought or preperation is more fun!" add on.
On the other hand, you have got fluff stating that the archangel is against Lycanthropes so i'll ignore it.
Quote:
Fires of Muspelheim: Once per day, a 5th level fury of Tresanerva can work herself up into a rage. In a rage, a fury temporarily gains a +4 bonus to Strength, a +4 bonus to Constitution, and a +2 morale bonus on Will saves, but he takes a -2 penalty to Armor Class. The increase in Constitution increases the fury’s hit points by 2 points per level, but these hit points go away at the end of the rage when her Constitution score drops back to normal. (These extra hit points are not lost first the way temporary hit points are.) While raging, a fury cannot use any Charisma-, Dexterity-, or Intelligence-based skills (except for Balance, Escape Artist, Intimidate, and Ride), the Concentration skill, or any abilities that require patience or concentration, nor can he cast spells or activate magic items that require a command word, a spell trigger (such as a wand), or spell completion (such as a scroll) to function. He can use any feat he has except Combat Expertise, item creation feats, and metamagic feats. A fit of rage lasts for a number of rounds equal to 3 + the character’s (newly improved) Constitution modifier. A fury may prematurely end her rage. At the end of the rage, the fury loses the rage modifiers and restrictions and becomes fatigued (-2 penalty to Strength, -2 penalty to Dexterity, can’t charge or run) for the duration of the current encounter. In addition, while raging the fury deals extra fire damage on all her attacks equal to half her class level.
Isn't Muspelheim supposed to be on fire? If so, where the hell is my glowing edges and fire damage? Heck, i feel cheated mostly because of the name. Rock moves faster when molten [and that's a feature of said layer with it's molten iron rivers] so it probably aught to be Dex in place of one of the stat bonuses.
Quote:
Flecked with Iron: At 6th level, while her obsidian spurs are out, a fury of Tresanerva’s unarmed strikes are treated as cold iron and silver for the purpose of overcoming damage reduction. Also, when targeted by a mind-affecting effect by a creature whose damage reduction is wholly or partially overcome by cold iron, a fury of Tresanerva can make two saving throws and choose which one to use. This effect occurs even if the obsidian spurs are not out.
Hmmm, screw you fairies, though i'm not really seeing the "fighting infiltrators" bit, unless this is aimed at the Chaotics? The living talisman bit is nicely more interesting than the silver sickening so have a pat on the back.
Quote:
Healing Waters: A 7th level fury of Tresanerva with a Charisma score of 12 or higher can heal wounds (her own or those of others) by touch. Each day she can heal a total number of hit points of damage equal to her fury of Tresanerva level × her Charisma bonus. A fury of Tresanerva may choose to divide her healing among multiple recipients, and she doesn’t have to use it all at once. Using healing waters is a standard action. This ability does not deal damage to undead.
Errrr...hmmm. Well, even I agree that Lay on Hands is a bit pointless. How about multiplying this lot by 10? And giving the ability to sacrifice multiples of 10 to do other Heal spell things? That'd be worth it. Unless this comes at the same level that an optimiser gets a bunch of goodies from the Brawler's helter skelter advancement, in which case ignore this.
Quote:
Aquifer of Holy Water: At 8th level, while her obsidian spurs are out, a fury of Tresanerva’s unarmed strikes are treated as good-aligned, cold iron and silver for the purpose of overcoming damage reduction. Also, when using her honour challenge ability against a creature whose damage reduction is wholly or partially overcome by good-aligned weapons, the fury gains a sacred bonus to AC and damage equal to half her class level as long as she fights the target of her ability. This effect occurs even if the obsidian spurs are not out, and ends when the fury attacks a creature who is not the target.
A reason to use the Honoured Challenge ability...I actually rather like this one, but isn't Travesen supposed to be fighting Chaos primarily. Surely alignment Lawful would make more sense in her duty and path?
Quote:
Reinforced with Adamantine: At 10th level, while her obsidian spurs are out, a fury of Tresanerva’s unarmed strikes are treated as adamantine, good-aligned, cold iron and silver for the purpose of overcoming damage reduction. Also, when attacking a creature whose damage reduction is wholly or partially overcome by adamantine, the fury gains a bonus on damage equal to the creatures damage reduction. This effect occurs even if the obsidian spurs are not out.
The second part makes little or no sense: You are a golem with DR 15/Adamantine. Not only do i ignore that DR, i deal 15 extra damge on top of this. Make it key only to partial overcomes and we're good, otherwise, i'd like to know why the already a bit flimsy constructs are getting their buttocks filleted here...
Quote:
And the Acolyte of the Archangels feat Acolyte of the Archangels (Tresanerva)[Exalted]
You swear fealty to Tresanerva, the paragon of rebellion and exposing evil. Benefit: Once per day you may make a touch attack against an opponent. If this touch attack hits, you deal no damage, but any illusions or transmutations used to disguise the opponent are dispelled. Special: Once you take this feat, you may not take it again, nor can you take either the Servant of the Heavens feat, Knight of the Stars or the Favored of the Companions feat. Your allegiance is only yours to give once.
Hmmm...an interesting one. I guess this is aimed at Rakhsashas mostly. Works i suppose.
Yeah, the Test of Mettle doesn't really fit with the burning nutter sound of "Fury of Lava Lady" as a name. In addition, the intention of the Adamantine thing seems a little off. If you choose to add a little fire, even if its cosmetic, remember that being heated makes iron more brittle once it cools, so the adamantime ability would make more sense if replaced with an attack that makes DR of all kinds into an all or nothing effect [so if you beat it, you ignore it completely].
I'll get to the doctor thing in a bit.
__________________
Mine is not so much a Peter Pan Complex as a Peter Pan Doom Fortress and Underground LairTM! Fae-o-matic Want a fae from folklore stated? Give me the lore and I'll do it for you! Le Cirque Funeste Evil Fairy Circus! Ray Bradbury, refined down to snortable powder!
12ft tall and made of mountain. Doesn't sound very angelic to me at all. This sounds like a nature spirit or one of the half assed attempts at fairies that Wizards are known for kicking out [see the court of stars...]
I'll work with what's here, however.
It's in general not good practice to make a class accessible to only one base class; i know wizards did this, but there's really no good reason for it. Even the Fist of Raziel is accessible via non-paladins...
Prehaps opting for "Dirty Fighting +2d6, Hijutsu +2d6, Skirmish +2d6/+1" or something like that. If anything, reposte would work well with this class. Either that or removing the requirements and including the advancement of the Brawler in a spoiler so that the class advances it even if you didn't start with it.
Monk classes do, why not this?
I'm not seeing Diplomacy or Sense Motive. They're pretty standard things for Exalted classes [the ability to at least TRY peace being a big factor in being exalted in the first place]. You're also lacking Knowledge [Religion], which should really be a prerequisite as well.
Advancing a badly organised class. Mentioned this before. You'd be better off including the advancement of these in a spoiler or sticking with a core class: Despite myths, there's a table in Sword and Fist that proves mathematically that Flurry of Blows does actually increase your hit rate as long as you need less than a 17 to hit and more than an 8...
I take it that using this is a ranged attack with all this entails. I know of some players who would argue that because it's described as being a melee attack, it doesn't provoke Attacks of Opportunity. I think that would be a bad idea if that was the intent.
Ok, so we have a form of high temperature silicate metamorphic rock involved here. Armour spikes are a passable ability, though the increase in dice size is nice. Best include how this interacts with the daffier damage dice that the Brawler has [how the hell do you advance 2d10 for instance? It's not in the tables].
So it's the Knight's challenge ability...Ok...
Not that that's all that powerful as it is.
Lame. Why would you use this, aside from the fact that like as not, you have nothing better to do with your swift action? It's a +1 bonus to a bonus category that you're already going to have better in if someone amongst your number is a Clerical caster or a Bard...
Waste of text space here.
Interesting; is this what it does on the Knight? If so, i'd never noticed...
I actually like this one, though it does seem out of place on a volcano themed nutter. Will comment on this in a few class abilities time. Should be in the table.
A -2 is very meh at this level, considering it's a fear effect... Very very meh. T'would be much better if it were able to make the "chaff," as you put it, flee like sissy girls, negating any need to harm them, but that's worth more than one challenge attempt, especially considering how pointless the first one is.
It's at least intrusive ignius rock, i suppose. Obsidian and Silver are not found together, though that's just pedanticness. Like most such abilities, it feels like a, "DR silver shouldn't be a problem for high level adventurers! Winning without thought or preperation is more fun!" add on.
On the other hand, you have got fluff stating that the archangel is against Lycanthropes so i'll ignore it.
Isn't Muspelheim supposed to be on fire? If so, where the hell is my glowing edges and fire damage? Heck, i feel cheated mostly because of the name. Rock moves faster when molten [and that's a feature of said layer with it's molten iron rivers] so it probably aught to be Dex in place of one of the stat bonuses.
Hmmm, screw you fairies, though i'm not really seeing the "fighting infiltrators" bit, unless this is aimed at the Chaotics? The living talisman bit is nicely more interesting than the silver sickening so have a pat on the back.
Errrr...hmmm. Well, even I agree that Lay on Hands is a bit pointless. How about multiplying this lot by 10? And giving the ability to sacrifice multiples of 10 to do other Heal spell things? That'd be worth it. Unless this comes at the same level that an optimiser gets a bunch of goodies from the Brawler's helter skelter advancement, in which case ignore this.
A reason to use the Honoured Challenge ability...I actually rather like this one, but isn't Travesen supposed to be fighting Chaos primarily. Surely alignment Lawful would make more sense in her duty and path?
The second part makes little or no sense: You are a golem with DR 15/Adamantine. Not only do i ignore that DR, i deal 15 extra damge on top of this. Make it key only to partial overcomes and we're good, otherwise, i'd like to know why the already a bit flimsy constructs are getting their buttocks filleted here...
Hmmm...an interesting one. I guess this is aimed at Rakhsashas mostly. Works i suppose.
Yeah, the Test of Mettle doesn't really fit with the burning nutter sound of "Fury of Lava Lady" as a name. In addition, the intention of the Adamantine thing seems a little off. If you choose to add a little fire, even if its cosmetic, remember that being heated makes iron more brittle once it cools, so the adamantime ability would make more sense if replaced with an attack that makes DR of all kinds into an all or nothing effect [so if you beat it, you ignore it completely].
I'll get to the doctor thing in a bit.
First of all, thank you for PEACHing. I disagree with quite a few of your statements, but as usual this is going to prove quite helpful I'm sure. A few things before I go off to modify this, she's not the magic lava lady, pretty much everything else is good, but the class is not a "burning nutter", and there is already fire damage added to attacks in Fires of Muspelheim, so I don't understand what your talking about with adding fire to the ability.
Quote:
In addition, while raging the fury deals extra fire damage on all her attacks equal to half her class level.
The class' obsidian spurs are based on the osteomancer (an arcane PrC that grows, you guessed it, bone spurs), and so I gave the various abilities, plus little additions I thought up. Just so we know what the basis of those abilities is. The aligned spurs are good-aligned because the class is exalted, though I'll change it to lawful if you think it wise.
I'll take the comparison to the Court of Stars as a compliment (I know you didn't mean it as such), since she is from Ysgard, the plane next to Arborea, and besides this one, Agapeial would be the next most like the eladrins logically.
__________________
Feel free to PM me if you want something PEACHed. I may not be one of the greats, but I'll do it if you ask.
"One of us is tender,
One of us is not,
One of us takes vengeance,
All four tied in a knot"
The fire damage is taked on to a really, really long paragraph that was copy pasted from the Barbarian's SRD, or looked like it at least. I think I can be forgiven for not seeing it.
The Osteomancer was one of my favourite ideas ever, unfortunately, it breaks down into the stuff that you've copied and loses all "bone" flavour or even attempt to pretend to have any non-metagame reasons for doing things at level 5 [aside from the bone puppetry and bone dissolving powers, admittely].
As her flavour seems drawn from here, it would probably be worthwhile looking for some lore on the Fierjotun or however that's spelled, given that the lords of that line were antagonists but never evil, per se in the sagas [you'll forgive me for categorically disagreeing with basically everything in Deities and Demigods beyond Thyrm, who's pretty cool].
The nutter comment is simple: you call a class Fury and set the originator on the fiery, unstable part of Yssgard and the assumption is overridingly "berzerker."
The Court of Stars suffers because they've very obviously [to the point where it was stated at one point] supposed to be basically Oberron and Titannia...but Good? Yeah, that's as far as i get. They're generic elf+ critters with some seemingly unconnected spell-like abilities. Gwyffnir is part of that bunch but bears no real resemblence to them so i'll let her slide.
Had the court been in any way connected to stars, celestial in make and fundamentally designed better than "they're like angels but just elves" i'd've liked them as a concept.
Anyway, your angel's physical powers and house are defined but she's less defined in personality than the seemingly ethically ambiguous Peonir; she has no stated goals beyond obliging her minions to actually get to know those they save, which is noble in its way.
__________________
Mine is not so much a Peter Pan Complex as a Peter Pan Doom Fortress and Underground LairTM! Fae-o-matic Want a fae from folklore stated? Give me the lore and I'll do it for you! Le Cirque Funeste Evil Fairy Circus! Ray Bradbury, refined down to snortable powder!
Okay, all of your suggestions have been incorporated, as usual, once I get down to it, you're right, though I kept the "knight's" challenge abilities, modifying the first and third to be more takeable (1st- better boni, 3rd- panicked on failure, shaken on success). Test of Mettle in the hands of a non-knight (or even a knight, the following is how I play them) I'd see more as trashtalking, calling an enemy out and questioning his worth (WARNING: your DM might find a knight, if played like this, to be dishonourable. Mine however, finds it hilarious. We call the knight class the trashtalker horseman at my table).
After some weighing of it, I made the aligned spurs ability lawful, as the intention for the good had been to combat demons, but many demons (the obyrith mainly) have damage reduction overcome by lawful, not good, so perhaps Tresanerva's furies focus on the old lords of the Abyss (seems more warriorlike to combat the massive cthulian horrors over the schemers, and I'm sure if the fury wanted, they could find a way to get good aligned unarmed strikes for those powerful fiends, the rest taken care of by earlier abilities).
Tresanerva is currently on Nidavellir, not Muspelheim, just on a side note. You seemed to be under the impression the she was on Muspelheim, can't blame you, the ability isn't called Fires of Nidavellir (by the way, I figured you probably skimmed the Fires ability when I saw your comment, no harm done, and you're right, to save myself time generally I copy and paste abilities to save my typing fingers. I separated the fire part from the rest to make it clearer), and obsidian is volcanic glass. Would you suggest Muspelheim instead? I always figured she just travelled between layers when there was a problem.
Also, more has been written on Tresanerva, mainly concerning her relationship to the many gods on Ysgard and her having a consort.
__________________
Feel free to PM me if you want something PEACHed. I may not be one of the greats, but I'll do it if you ask.
"One of us is tender,
One of us is not,
One of us takes vengeance,
All four tied in a knot"
RSS Feeds: 
Angelic Paragons: Fury of Tresanerva (PEACH)
).
