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Some of these may have been done, I didn't read everything.
Ghost Sound: Korg inconspicuously stands to one side, and tries to imitate an owl.
Phantasmal Killer: Korg is very good at casting this. Nobody has yet realized it is only an illusion of an angry, deluded barbarian half-orc coming to make a pretzel out of their spine.
Raise Dead: Korg lifts up dead thing.
Mirror Image: Material component: Mirror. Korg stands in front of mirror.
Alternate Mirror Image: Korg hops between four spots. Quickly.
Hideous Laughter: Material component: disposable person. Korg makes a joke, and punches out disposable person when he doesn't laugh.
Fireball: Korg throws campfire. (I would love to see how that goes with the DM.)
Alter Self: Korg puffs out his cheeks and walks on his knees.
I wouldn't recommend giving him a penalty to Int (he could use the skill points to put into various disguise or bluff skills or whatever) but he could totally dump Wis or something. I always though of Intelligence as being (the mental ability to think up cool stuff) while Wisdom is (the mental ability to avoid doing stupid stuff). Charisma is just the ability to look cool while doing whatever you're doing... be it cool or stupid.
Anyway, he'll also need a beard. Wizards have long flowing beards while barbarians might have wild unshaven beards, just give your wild beard a few run-throughs with a comb and you've got the wizard look down pat.
Of course, you could always try to equate a wizards power with the length of their beard.
Evil Wizard: So, you foolish adventurers have come to stop my masters plans? Well, I wil defeat you all with my powerf...
Korg: Korg challange dumb wizard to wizard duel!
Evil Wizard (has no points in sense motive): Oh, so I finally meet the famed Korg the Magical. I must admit you've provem quite effective despite your... ahem... mongrel heritage.
Korg: Korg better wizard than you because Korgs beards bigger than your beard! Korg break your beard and you not be any kind of wizard to hurt anyone!
Evil Wizard: Umm... I see, you think your greater age and experience will give you victory. (Gah, how I dislike dealing with other wizards. We have such abysmal charisma that its a wonder we can talk straight). Well you're mistaken,Old Man! My youth and vitality will se me triumph over you ancie...
Korg: Arcane....DISJUNCTION! RAHHHH!!! *Korg runs up to the Evil Wizard, grabs onto his beard and rips it right off of his face!*
Evil Wizard: HOly Sweet mother of!! My Face, my beauiful face! *grabs onto the bleeding part of his face where his beard was*
Korg: Smite EVILL! *Smashes the evil wizard over the head with his staff of smiting*
Paladin (still a fighter with a horse): Wow, such a wonderous display. Looks like that necromancer won't be causing any more troubles.
Evil Wizard: Oh god I'm in such pain...
Korg: *snaps the evil wizards neck* Korg good at breaking neckromancers.
Paladin: Well then, I'll just go search the rest of the place: Detect Evil *looks at some ugly minion* ... he's evi! Kill him! *kills the minion* Detect Evil *looks at a hot chick* She's good... but wounded. Time to lay on hands!
Korg: Now Korg take evil wizards power for Korgs own. *Takes the ripped off beard and knits the hair into his own beard to make it longer* Now Korgs beard bigger than ever! Korgs wizardly powers get better every time Korg beat other wizards in wizard duels.
If you want to play Korg as being "Fairly smart in his own way." Have him take an interest in stuff like riddles or arcane theories. Not that he cares for them or even half-understands them but he knows how to spout stuff that seems magical for those not versed in it while giving severe headaches to those who actually know how magic works.
Korg: Evil Wizard not be able to defeat Korg because Korgs familiar better than your familiar and grant Korg more spells! *holds up terrified cat*
Evil Wizard: What? Thats not... I don't even have a familiar! Familiars are a waste because wizards lose power if their familiar gets hurt.
Korg: Exactly! Clerics gets spells from gods and get all kinds of spells and can wear armor. Wizards get spells from tiny animals *screaming cat* and get specific blasty spells but can't wear bulky armor. You no have familiar to give you spells while I have a familiar so I stronger than you and you lose already!
Evil Wizard (also has no ranks in sense motive): What?! Thats not possib... but it makes logical sense that the source of magic would require a secondary node to transmit the infromation through nondimentional space...
Korg: Arcane Transformationg! *flexes muscles* Rawwr! *Smashes wizard with his staff*
Evil Wizard: Nooo! I knew I should have gotten that toad familiar instead of trading it for an extra feat! *dies*
Not sure what skills you want Korg to have but Handle Animal could let you train some animals to be your familiars/summoned monsters/thralls or whatever.
Also, there is the feat "Able Learner" that lets you buy cross class skill ranks at a ratio of 1:1 but are still limited by the maximum ranks you can have in the skill. So, instead of a character using their skill points to max out one class skill could train in two cross class skills for exactly the same numer of skill points.
Not sure how well this fits in with the character concept but I'm thinking having Korg moderately skilled in bluffing, sense motive, and other skills could come in handy while pretending to be a wizard. Unless you'd rather he just brute force his way through everything which could work out just as well.
Also: He can train various animals to help him (either the nice way or the les than nice way). Use a skunk as the animal focus for the stinking cloud spell.
Oh, and see if there is a way to grapple an enemy wizard by their beard and twirl them around in a circle.
LOLOLOL! I literally almost choked on a damn cracker as I was reading the bit about Korg ripping off the beard. So freaking hilarious!
And no one has mentioned yet Korg's strongest spell, the bane of any spellcasters!
Fear the mighty Mage's Disjunction - Any enemy spellcaster within Korg's fists radius is disjoined. That is, the mage itself is separated into its individual components... say, bones, flesh, muscles, tongue, brain, spinal chord...
__________________ The Pen is mightier than the Sword - when the message is written in Blood.
"Korg make shelaylay oyl (a bottle of cinnamon oil), so majik staff (greatclub) hit harder."
"Isn't that a druid spell?"
Cue rage and numerous "inflict spells".
"Oh sweet pelor that burns"
Also korg master of psionics. Korg manerfest:
Schism - starts talking to himself, and allows him to cast multiple arcane strikes each round (iteratives)
Shatter Mindblank - also affects teeth.
Ego Whip - "not in the face, not in the face".
Time Hop - knock them into next Tuesday.
Energy Retort - korg only one that manerfest this power as wood (robilar's gambit+greatclub)
Psychic crush - Headbutt.
Affinity Field - whenever someone hits you, you punch everyone else in the area just as hard.
Elfsight-pulls out a severed elf head, and points it all around, when that doesn't work shout "dang this only half-elf".
You might want to take a peek at the spoiler posted just above you -- Korg 'cast' "Arcane Disjunction" there.
Amazing, they are really worded identically.
By the way, could you please point out in which rulebook Arcane Disjunction can be found? Thanks!
[/OT]
More spells!
## Blade of Blood
Components: M - a corpse freshly killed by Korg; S - splashing the weapon with blood. ## Touch of Idiocy
Korg casts this on himself first thing in the morning to avoid being "too overpowering". ##Expeditious Retreat/Haste
Run feat, Fast movement, yelled before moving full speed. ##Acid Arrow
Components: M - ingest poison, make Fortitude save; V - spit at nearby mage with CON as a dump stat.
__________________ The Pen is mightier than the Sword - when the message is written in Blood.
cloudkill(M garlick, V): Korg eats garlick and breathes heavily.
Featherfall(S), ignore damage from falling, this is a mind affecting ability
Daze(M,S) : hit target to the head, is effective against all HD
detect secret door(S(M)): hit agianst the wall until it sounds funny or Korg smashes through the wall, battering ram as focus provides a +10 on the search check
locate city(V,S,M): with a map spekaing the city's name pointing it on a map
discern bloodline(V,S): intimidate check made with the question who/what are you
Master's touch(M,S,V): Korg thrusts a weapon into someone's hands, and threthens them to use it well, the target will **** she/he/it's pants and do it's absolute best to wield it.
Forcewave(S): Korg bullrushes target, no save will apply
Dragon's breath(M,V): Korg takes a sip of very flammable material, and spits it out while holding a torch in front of it. this will create a 15' cone chaped burst of fire, 1d4 per level (max 5d4)
Angry visage(V,S): Korg gets level as bonus on initmidate while raging
Cause fear(V): Korg looks angry and intimidates enemies for 1d4 rounds and they are frightened.
lantern light won't be in the spellbook, because, seriously, Krog will use his rod of Lordly Might and thus can't cast lantern light
cloudkill(M garlick, V): Korg eats garlick and breathes heavily.
You mixed up cloudkill and stinking cloud.
Quote:
detect secret door(S(M)): hit agianst the wall until it sounds funny or Korg smashes through the wall, battering ram as focus provides a +10 on the search check
Automatic success if using an adamantine weapon as a focus.
Glitterdust: Throw pouch of flour into the air. Material component: pouch of flour. Why doesn't it glitter? Because Korg is no girly elf.
Detect invisibility: "I SEEEEEE YOU!" Unfortunately the Target moves too fast to catch.
Arcane Lock: focus, one lock, placed on item to be locked. Now magically locked!
Blight: Material component: Contents of Bladder.
Calm Animals: "Animal calm now. See him lying there peacefully? No, he not dead, that silly... oops, maybe Krog too powerful a wizard."
Circle of Death. Draw circle in ground. If a creature crosses into circle, they die.
Confusion: works on enemies that see Krog 'casting'
Contagion: Krog sneezes on nearby opponent.
Create Food/Water: Survival check
Darkvision: Krog even got it permanent on himself. If it doesn't work, then you must have been blinded.
Detect animals or plants: "HEY YOU GU-UYS!"
Discern lies. Requires a hammer to make Law and Order sound, then Krog decides which words are lies and which aren't (hint, most enemies lie all the time)
Disguise Self (as barbarian) "Krog good wizard!"
Disrupt Undead: "He no have head. That disrupted!"
Eyebite: Krog drops pants
Forsight: "Krog knew that would happen!"
Ghost Sound: "Oooooh; Sppooooooooky!"
Hide from animals/undead: "They no can see me know" "Must have good will saves" Material component: Bush, placed on Krog's head.
Hold Portal: "Krog got it!"
Identify: "That pretty necklace."
Illusory script: "Krog protect spellbook with Illusory Script!"
Invisibility "If Krog can't see you, you can't see Krog!"
Mage Hand "Krog mage, so Krog's hand Mage Hand."
Mage's Lucubration: Material Component: alcohol "Krog Lucubrated!"
Mage's Sword: See Mage Hand, replace hand with sword
Magic Mouth: More Ventriloquism
Make Whole: Action: squeeze until parts stick together. Optional material component: Glue
Misdirection: Krog Misdirect other casters to believe Krog simple barbarian.
Open/Close: Focus: key for item to be opened or closed.
Passwall: Focus: digging tools
Produce Flame: Focus; Flint and Steel
Reduce Person/Animal: sit on target
Shrink Item: See above
Ventriloquism: "I'm really speaking from the statue and not from behind the middle door!"
Web: Material component: Net
I don't know if any of these are repeats, but I thought they were good ideas
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MesiDoomstalker
Thread won! I don't think I have the authority to do that but whatever
A Barbarian Wizard? That Character must have been an illegitimate child to an actual wizard, but was raised by his father, being the chief of his clan.
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Re: Help Me Be Annoying with a Barbarian Wizard
and thus can't cast lantern light 
