[Nexus] Trog's Tavern CCXLI

Slii Arhem · 03-15-2012, 11:41 PM

*Upon entering the tavern you find it to be rustic, dim, cramped, and smelling of spilled beer. Moving through the crowd, half of which seem to be deadtiming, you spot a fireplace with a banjowood carving on the mantle, you also make out through the haze the curving bar and private booths hidden behind ferns. A side door leading to a patio outside reveals a hungry looking dumpster mimic sneaking towards an unsuspecting customer.

Near the stairs to the second floor rooms is a small white stone platform with a blue tree-like symbol on it. Standing on this platform will teleport someone to the Sanctuary Fortress located Inside where healers are always standing by in case of bar-brawls.

Trog's can be found right around the corner from any place in the Nexus. Somehow. It's best not to question it.

Staff:
Owner and Proprietor: Trog
Manager: El Jaspero
Bartenders: The Watchers (they're nice deranged cultists, really!), Phoebe, Ashna, Ambrosia

Trog's Tavern hires only the finest NPC servers:
((Since all are NPCs they are up for communal control. Feel free to say what they do or say to you or any other patron. To a point.))

Bouncer: Baby (NPC, a dwarf who was raised by orcs and has the intellect of Thog.)

Servers:
Nina - A fiesty and vivacious tiefling. Mean, self-centered and completely unavailable. You may have seen her recently on the WotC 4E cartoon.
Paige - A sweet, wholesome, flirty elf working her way through PC school.
Cosmo - A quick-witted and oppressed gnome scoundrel. Truly a monster. RAWR!

DRINK MENU:
Wines:
Catoblepas Sauvingnon
Chimera Cabernet - A hearty red with a hits of oak and black cherry.
Chuul Lounge - Bacardi Limon, Aberration , creme de bananes and juices into a Chuul shaker half-filled with ice cubes. Shake well. Strain into a highball glass half-filled with ice cubes, and serve.
Constitution Crushing Wine - Fort. DC 35 or pass out!
Cormyrian Fireamber - Imported and very good.
Eladrin Carbernet - Official Feywine of the Wild Hunt
Feline's Fancy - A purplish, swirly mixture that any feline will adore.
Funky Llama - A rich fruity wine, available in white or red.
Iames Agonia - This tart, dark red wine will stun you and leave you feeling good for hours.
Kobold Chianti - Tart. Tangy. Shifty.
Merfolk Merlot - Full-bodied with a hint of rose.
Powerlust Pinot - For those corruptable humans
Shadar-Kai Shadowine - Served in a jagged, broken glass
Spoonake Chablis - Straight from the Underdark!
Warlock Wine - Best served cold
Xorn Zinfandel - Sweet and fruity!

Mixed Drinks:
A Drink - Generic booze with ice that can be shaken, stirred, or you know, whatever. Try to be more imaginative next time.
Aboleth Absinthe - Far Realmilicious!
Black Shadow - A strong concoction guaranteed to send a chill down your spine at any temperature.
Coffee Martini - Buzzzzz.
Djinn and Tonic - Whirling ice cubes, fizzy soda, and one drunk genie.
Dragon Liver Buster - Strongest drink in the house
Dwarf Spirits
Fire Archon Asylum Rum - "FAAR!!!"
Haley's Liquer - Named for the redheaded rogue, a sweet creme liquer, excellent over ice.
Hemo Colada - 100% less coconut, 100% more ichor
Ice Liquer - From the Plane of Ice: guaranteed to cool you down.
Ichor Liquor - Made from a fermented mix of various kinds of blood
Jasphattan - El J's Secret Recipie, vermouth & bitters
LEVEL UP LIQUER - Need a few extra XP? We gots XP in a bottle!
Long Island Iced Tea - Tastes better than it will make you feel in the morning
Murderita - Wasted away again...
Piña CoLlama - If you're not into yoga and have half a brain.
Rampaging Rail Mixer - Mad strong!
Rust Monster - Scotch, drambuie shaken in a wooden mixer.
Sneak on the Beach - Peach vodka, cran-pineapple juice, a cat hair
Swampwater - Phosphorescent lemon-lime
White Russian Wukei - for bounty hunters who dig dairy
Wizard Blizzard - Crushed ice and Bourbon. The effect depends on the spell stored in it.

Beers & Such:
Ales: Archon, Guilders, Balthor's Best
Grim Brewery Ginger Beer - Death-o-licious!
Mind Flayer Mead - Mmm... brains.

Other Fine Beverages:
Celestial Soda Pop - Soda specially brewed in Celestia. Tastes divine.
Darknight Coffee - cream has no effect
Dragon's Fire Breath (cherry Kool-Aid) - for the kids!
Fox Cola - the choice of the furry generation
Llamonade - That cool, refreshing drink for quadrupeds
Oni Tea - From the far east.
Red Minotaur Energy Drink - a-MAZE-ing energy!
Root Beer
Save vs. Slow Slurpees™ - C-c-c-cold
Hot Chocolate - Mmmmmmarshmallows

MUNCHIES MENU:
AbyssalNuts - damned and spicy
Baked Goods - Scones and Muffins and Brownies oh my! We have no cake - the cake is a lie!
Bamhacon - where the ham meets the bacon. Served with eggs.
Court of Stars Salad - Fresh fey greens
Hero Sandwiches - what else? Served with Villain vinegrette
Velvet Elfish - Trogtilla chips and hot meat and cheese dip
Yuan-ti Gyros - Lamb. Or halfling. We're not sure.
Trog's Floor Chili - Don't ask Trog where it came from and Trog won't tell you "the floor"
SMOKABLES:
Dwarven Cigars - From our axe-hewn humidor
Coffin Nail™ Cigarettes - Get Nailed!
Halfling Pipeweed - Bogart™ brand

((When this thread reaches page 50, anyone can make the next thread. However, if you want to make changes to the OP, please check in the OOC thread first to make sure everyone agrees.))

The Mad Hatter · 03-15-2012, 11:47 PM

I posted Javert response in the last one...I've been new thread ninja'd!

Chaotic Bob · 03-15-2012, 11:50 PM

Spoiler

Muahahaha! Victory!
Another cracked case of Grumpybuttitis.

Viera totally doesn't stick her tongue out at Javert and giggle again to celebrate her success.
Instead sh-SHINY ROCKS.

Those are almost as cool as the crab claws the chimera girl will poke at.
"Oooooh, the beach has all of this cool stuff just lying around?"
She has not, in fact, ever bothered to go to the beach. For some reason.

Meanwhile, her amusing-noise-cushion is thieved!
That's okay, because she's probably going to thieve a couple of these claws.

Rebonack · 03-16-2012, 12:21 AM

Ha!

Victory!

The grumpy half-drow laughed! He might insist that he hates children but no one can resist kids doing silly things for very long. And drow males probably have very little resistance to amusing child antics since they often times never see their children whilst said children are still children.

As for claw-theft, that's totally okay. As Raven said there are all sorts of neat things just laying around on the ground. She can always acquire more crab-claws if need be. "Mhmm. There were some humans there picking things up as well. I do not think anyone minds if you take them."

She then fishes a funny looking green rock out of her pack. Soapstone maybe? It feels all filmy and soft and brittle. Neat!

"This made me think of the stone Squid-beard's city is made of."

Certainly the same color! Fewer non-Euclidean geometries though.

MEANWHILE!

"You would look a lot more like a tree if you had some leaves," Divaonar points out.

ALSO MEANWHILE!

Sadei wrinkles her nose a bit. "Um... I'm not really sure where to start?"

Gulaghar · 03-16-2012, 01:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sneaky Weasel

Phineas raises an eyebrow at Bark.
"Oh, I'm good at keeping calm. This is hardly the strangest thing to happen to me, although it's up there."
He smiles at Aeia's invitation.
"Certainly, let us find a table. I could go for a drink as well."
He beckons the two of them to follow, weaving his way through the inn to a suitable table.

As he goes, he notices a pair of children and one of the Unseelies having an altercation, and he shakes his head. No business of his, he thought, unless they disturbed him of his new-found friends.

No, he was not going to start a fight. So don't even think about that. That would be wrong.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Slii Arhem

Oh, she's looking at him again is she? It would probably be more helpful of her in the long run to simply tell him what he had done wrong, as she said she would earlier, rather than glowering at him. All she manages with that look is to make him feel somewhat put off.

No more put off than the little thing poking at his leg and saying things at him.

"Yes, I used to be a tree." Two can play the obvious game, although Bark is rather unsure if he's playing it correctly.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rebonack

MEANWHILE!

"You would look a lot more like a tree if you had some leaves," Divaonar points out.

The dryad grins and is quick to follow him. When they find a suitable table, whether or not Bark and Div follow, Aeia slides into the seat next to Phineas. The way she's seated, with her her body turned toward him and her hand resting on her thigh, there's no way she's not trying to give him a bit of a view.

"So you say this is your afterlife? But that means you'd have to have died." She puts her hand over her mouth. "What happened?" She asks as if it were the most interesting thing in the world. Not that she isn't interested, but she's playing it up a bit.

Sneaky Weasel · 03-16-2012, 01:50 AM

Phineas gives her a lopsided smile, obviously enjoying her curiosity.

"Well, it was a climactic battle between law and chaos, me against all the forces of oppression. Leaping across rooftops, grappling with werewolves, that sort of thing. Unfortunately for me the bastard I was fighting took me off the roof when he fell, and we both plummeted to our demise. Luckily, it seems it wasn't permanent for me." He grins roguishly.

Turning, he flags down a waiter and orders drinks for the two of them. A martini for him, and whatever Aeia wants for her. Although do dryads drink at all, except for water?

OrchestraHc · 03-16-2012, 06:59 AM

A gulp can be heard coming from Alfred's throat after the knight mentions his parents.

"Well, how do you track him? Is there something we can do to help?" He's very eager to not have his parents be the first stop.

The Mad Hatter · 03-16-2012, 09:33 AM

Javert eventually bites his tongue to stop from outright giggling in a momentary fit. He had never really had a childhood like that. So....fun....carefree...but now was not the time for regrets. Instead the drow actually moves over to the children and nods at them. Then the drow finally realizes that there are people here! Hey...where'd that little Xar'cha go? He must know what this strange place is. He had never had it fully explained. The very handsome, and malevolent drow approaches Div. "Er.....you...I don't exactly know where I am...What is this place?

Slii Arhem · 03-16-2012, 10:43 AM

"I am not a tree any longer, therefore I do not need leaves." It's true. He may have been a tree once, but now where would he even put them? Well, besides perhaps a censorship leaf over his dangly bits, but that's what the bedsheet is for.

Bark will move somewhat closer to Aeia's new position, just enough to ensure she isn't stretching the bond between them too much. Still, he isn't going so close that he'd be eavesdropping on their conversation. Why would he want to, after all?

Rebonack · 03-16-2012, 11:09 AM

"I dunno... So you can do tree things again?" Divaonar suggests. He isn't totally sure what kinds of things trees do, having never been one himself. He's pretty certain they soak up light and air and water and stuff from their surroundings and... well... it in one spot? Grow? Makes seeds?

Seems like it would be pretty boring.

Suddenly!

Div is approached by the much older half-drow and asked a question!

The same half-drow that had basically told him to bugger off no more than a few minutes prior. As one might expect this results in a rather sour look from the boy as he tries to decide how to respond.

Hmmm...

Oh!

"Only if you tell me what House you belong to first," Div replies to Javert. Just to make it clear he's resolute in this matter he crosses his arms over his chest.

There!

Now it's serious!

Shadowcaller · 03-16-2012, 11:16 AM

"And where does he usually go? Is there a shop? Perhaps a special field he goes to where he hunts... these things." Whatever they were.

Rebonack · 03-16-2012, 11:28 AM

Sadei shrugs. "I don't know. I don't even know what a flutter-pony is. Though... If I had to guess I think it would be a pony that flutters."

That seems like a really safe bet.

"But I can find him," she pokes at her nose a few times with one finger. "My siblings and I are really different from most of the people living on the material plane. We can track each other by smell! Or... I guess smell would be the closest word for the sense we use..."

Silly starspawn and their silly preternatural senses.

"So we go out and I just follow my nose. He didn't leave that long ago, so it shouldn't be very hard!"

And it'll be an adventure!

Yay adventure!

The Mad Hatter · 03-16-2012, 11:53 AM

Javert sighs a little...why wouldn't the kid just tell him what he wanted to know...and he couldn't get the information by force without Remnant hounding him...again....He explains, "I don't have one...I quit. Which was a complete lie. Javert died and was then abandoned by his house after he failed epically in the Xar'cha incident....

Slii Arhem · 03-16-2012, 11:54 AM

"I was doing tree things before you started poking me. Standing in one place and trying not to think. It was... relaxing." Very relaxing. He'd much rather be doing that again.

Maybe now that Divaonar is distracted by the grumpybutt drow he can go back to doing that.

Gulaghar · 03-16-2012, 12:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sneaky Weasel

Phineas gives her a lopsided smile, obviously enjoying her curiosity.

"Well, it was a climactic battle between law and chaos, me against all the forces of oppression. Leaping across rooftops, grappling with werewolves, that sort of thing. Unfortunately for me the bastard I was fighting took me off the roof when he fell, and we both plummeted to our demise. Luckily, it seems it wasn't permanent for me." He grins roguishly.

Turning, he flags down a waiter and orders drinks for the two of them. A martini for him, and whatever Aeia wants for her. Although do dryads drink at all, except for water?

My dryad variety don't need to eat or drink (most of the time), but actually live on a sort of magical photosynthesis. They're bodies are surprisingly adaptable, however. So, she'll just get what Phineas is having. *nodnod*

"Oh wow, that's so exciting. I'm sure glad it wasn't permanent." Aeia pushes her leaves out of her face and beams at Phineas. "So who were you fighting? I wanna hear all about it."

Rebonack · 03-16-2012, 12:13 PM

Now two people are talking to Div at once!

Whatever shall he do!

...probably just respond to each in turn.

"You quit?" Div inquires curiously. "I didn't know you could do that."

Didn't the females of the House technically own the males? How would they quit, exactly?

Ah well.

The guy answered and so Div will explain! "This is the Nexus. It's a place where lots of different worlds overlap in weird and unusual ways. People and locations are pulled here form their place of origin all the time. And in some places you can just walk here like you would walk to the next town over."

A beat.

"Oh! And most importantly! You should remember this-"

There isn't a little boy standing in front of Javert. And Javert may suddenly come to the realization that there was never a little boy standing in front of him. How he could have possibly missed it baffles the mind.

Instead of a little boy there stands before him a twenty foot long abomination against sanity and nature alike, clad in ebony armor and crawling with electric blue sigils. An eldritch, chimeric beast. Half jackal and half vulture and half crocodile and half impala. Seven eyes burning like cerulean stars fix on the half drow, a gaze that pierces flesh and bone and soul and mind.

The universe is objecting rather violently to the number of halves the chimera has, but aside from making it rather uncomfortable to look straight at Divaonar for too long the objections are going unheeded.

"-don't ever believe you understand everything that's going on here. No one does. Not me. Not my Mother. And certainly not you."

The little boy then begins bugging the former tree again!

Wait... Little boy?

What's that? You're sure there was an eldritch terrorhorror in the bar? Oh no. There couldn't have been. Nothing more than a totally normal half-drow child the whole time. To suggest anything else would be crazy.

Anywho!

"How come you aren't a tree anymore?" Div inquires curiously. Seems strange to him that a tree would stop being a tree and still be alive. Normally a tree dies when it starts to be something else. Like, say, a chair.

The Mad Hatter · 03-16-2012, 12:20 PM

Javert glares at Divs first comment. ...I', just special and got to quit. Javert...you lie too much. Eventually you're going to get caught....

Then the annoying little child morphs into ~~Cthulhu~~ a chimera monster! Javert is somewhat frightened and backs away a little bit. Then he regains his ~~composer?~~

composure. There was more to Javert then meets the eye, but that boy just changed....and now he's back?

Javert tells the boy, How...did you do that?

Slii Arhem · 03-16-2012, 12:22 PM

"I was made of a special kind of wood when I was a tree, that would not die when it was cut down. A mage cut me down to take advantage of this property, and sculpted me into this form. Afterwards, he used horrible magics to make me think and move. It was very uncomfortable." Oh Bark, there you go understating things again. Sadly for Divaonar's impressive little display, Bark has missed the presence of the half-everything chimeric monster by virtue of ignoring things that he cannot comprehend.

Such a useful skill.

Rebonack · 03-16-2012, 12:38 PM

Morphing?

Changing?

Oh no. Not in the least. That would imply some alteration to the form of Divaonar. But no such thing has taken place. Perhaps an analogy would do...

Spoiler

An image with two pictures in it. Both pictures are always there, but depending on one's perspective the picture that is seen will change.

Such is the case with Divaonar and his siblings. They don't change form. They don't morph. They simply allow some poor mortal to see them from another perspective.

Anywho!

Div is paying attention to the former tree now, seemingly oblivious to the obviously confused and distressed half-demon. "That's really sad... I'm sorry to hear that," he replies to Bark.

And then has a question asked of him by Javert!

To which Div wrinkles his nose a little. "Did what?"

The Mad Hatter · 03-16-2012, 12:41 PM

Javert is now extremely confused. You...you were different!

Slii Arhem · 03-16-2012, 12:45 PM

Bark pauses, unsure of how to respond. Then slowly, tentatively, he reaches out and tries to put a hand on Div's head.

"... Thank you."

Rebonack · 03-16-2012, 12:51 PM

Extreme confusion is a common symptom in the Nexus. Javert should really get use to it.

"No I wasn't," Div retorts. He sounds kinda confused himself, honestly. "I'm just like I was before. Except now I'm talking to Bark. He used to be a tree you know."

This is vital information!

And yes.

Div does know that he shifted his perspective just to surprise the half-demon. Y'know. Rattle him a little. Get him out of his comfort zone. Give him a feel for just how absurdly weird and unpredictable the Nexus is.

So why isn't he being forthcoming about it?

Because he's a mischievous little ten-year old boy in addition to being a starspawn of K'rax-Naggath.

Then he gets patted on the head!

D'aaww...

The Mad Hatter · 03-16-2012, 12:54 PM

Javert glares at the boy. He knew it did something...yes. The boy ewas an 'it'. A monster.....A trickster...Javert sighs a little. Boy....you did some spell. Tell me now or else.

OrchestraHc · 03-16-2012, 12:56 PM

(First, as someone who is short sighted, that was a fun picture.)

Yay adventure, indeed.

Alfred is certainly excited to go. "So we just follow your nose to whereever your brother is! Across cities and forests and rivers and canyons..." The lad is starry-eyed at the thought of all the questing they'll do.

Slii Arhem · 03-16-2012, 12:57 PM

Oh, there's someone else here? Bark looks at Javert, then down at Divaonar again. Huh. The former tree hadn't noticed his conversation partner had been talking to someone else.

"Yes, I used to be a tree." It is very important information, isn't it. So much so that Bark repeats it to Javert now, just to make sure he remembers.

Bark doesn't much care for the angry tone that Javert is taking with the boy, even though he'd just tuned in, and wasn't exactly sure what the half-drow was saying.

Rebonack · 03-16-2012, 01:27 PM

Picture's worth a thousand words and all that.

"I don't know any spells!" Div objects. Which is totally true. He can cast no magic of any kind. His abilities are purely eldritch in nature, operating on hyper-natural laws that seemingly bend and at times even break those that are more familiar. All the chimeras can, to some extent. Though all the chimeras also have different focuses for this skills.

"My brother Ibby knows how to use magic, but I don't."

Magic of most any kind imaginable. Though Ib'ahhali is particularly fond of the Magic of Friendship.

MEANWHILE!

Sadei nods, trying her best not to giggle at the situation nearby. "That's right. We find my brother and help him with what he needs. Then he can remove the curse from you."

Shadowcaller · 03-16-2012, 03:54 PM

"Great! It's settled then! It'll be a great adventure with all kinds of lords and ladies coming." Alfred was possibly a rogue, all children were and Sadei... well, she was probably some kind of monster girl. They were always great to have along.

"So shall we set off?" The knight asks.

Earl of Purple · 03-16-2012, 04:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VampireRot

Ermine growls at the dwarf and reaches into her hat with a paw. She grasps something inside, probably a weapon.

"Okay, I've 'ad just about enough o' you. I'm thinkin' ye need ta set sail and git yer smelly backside away from me, or I'll build a plank made o' pain and make ye walk it."

I'm sure that threat made sense somewhere. The mustelid's fur raises and she arcs her back threateningly. The pirate isn't very adorable anymore.

"If that is your wish, Milady Cap'n Stoat. Though I'd beware the blue lady if you wish to keep your cat." The mad dwarf then stands up and sits elsewhere.

He's wearing chainmail dotted with rust, a dented steel helm mounting a massive pair of antlers, though there's tines missing and lots of random rotting vegetation dangling off that which remains. His hair is long and brown, and was braided, though it's been neglected long enough that few of the braids remain, most of it either loose or conglomerating into matted dreadlocks. The same process is occurring within his beard. His eyes are blue, and lit with the light of madness. At some point, he lost his left boot, causing that foot to be scratched and wounded.

Sneaky Weasel · 03-16-2012, 05:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gulaghar

My dryad variety don't need to eat or drink (most of the time), but actually live on a sort of magical photosynthesis. They're bodies are surprisingly adaptable, however. So, she'll just get what Phineas is having. *nodnod*

"Oh wow, that's so exciting. I'm sure glad it wasn't permanent." Aeia pushes her leaves out of her face and beams at Phineas. "So who were you fighting? I wanna hear all about it."

Phineas adopts a thoughtful expression. "The man I was fighting was one Jeremias Golding, a powerful sorcerer and leader of the corrupt government that ruled there. Vile, despicable, and deadly all spring to mind when thinking of him. I'm glad he's gone now." He smiles, dropping the thoughtful attitude. "Enough about me, what about you? I imagine you life is just as interesting. What's the connection between you and Bark?" He leans back and sips his drink.
You're really pathetic, you know that Phineas?
Shut up. It's bad enough I have to carry you around everywhere without you insulting me.

Chaotic Bob · 03-16-2012, 05:19 PM

Somewhere Over There, Viera is poking at the maybe-soapstone that her sibling pulled out.
It seems peculiar, for something just sorta...found on the ground for freebies.
Most neat things have to be paid for, so obviously this beach is a wonderful, wonderful place.

"No squiggly tentacle monsters to go with it though, I guess? People around here don't seem to like those very much."
Beaches would certainly be more interesting with an influx of Cthulhu-lite monsters...

At least, ones that aren't beached, dying squids.