[Nexus] Thanksmasnewyearskwanzaakkah![Canon or Non-Canon]

[Wolfbane]

In a small, snow-covered valley, on the borders between ffrp universes, lies a tiny village consisting of gingerbread buildings. There, happy devils frolic and play, building toys for good little girls and boys. Every day, if you listen closely, you can hear their screams of agonizing pain as they're forced to do this instead of kicking puppies or similar evil deeds.

In the center of the town lies a giant chair, where you can line up to have your picture taken with Vespe Decker Butler Claus (or whoever is on duty! ) and tell herhim what you want for Thanksmasnewyearskwanzaakkah. Nine times out of ten, it'll be in the sack sitting beside herhim (it seems to be bigger on the inside). Maybe there will even be an out of continuity ButlerDecker Elf assisting herhim! And maybe Vespe Claus will show up too!

There's also singing, candy, and all sorts of Thanksmasnewyearskwanzaakkah events, like the traditional Pin The Knife On The Duck.

Have fun (and try not to blow everything up)!

((ooc request: no invasions plz! kthxbai!))

Edit: Any character can roleplay as Santa Claus. Keep it silly and lighthearted and don't give away anything too powerful.

Edit 2: All welcome here. It can be in canon or not for your character, as you choose.

2010 thread
2009 thread
2008 thread

[Wolfbane]

A gray form skips down the path to the village, humming merrily while wearing little more than red pants and a santa hat. Wolfy approaches the chair and does a little cartwheel before landing in the chair, legs crossed and present sack by his side. "Look out ladies! Wolfy Claws is back!" He says with a huge grin.

[TechnoScrabble]

Riley is here, bundled up in clothes that he may or may not have taken from people after using his powers to dizzy them.
The child doesn't seem to understand that he can use his bag of gold and platinum to buy things other than food and treats for the animals at petting zoo.
Then he sees Wolfy Claws.

And runs right up to (try to) give him a hug.
"Puppy!"

[Wolfbane]

Wolfy chuckles and gives the kid a hug, unbothered by the near-glomp. "Hello! What are you wanting for this Thanksmas?" He asks with a smile.

[TechnoScrabble]

"What do I what for what?" Riley's led a sheltered life up until recently.
Sheltered by cultists who were raising him to be Cthulhu's midnight snack.
His understanding of wanting something is when his brain tells him to take something or when Father Face 'wanted to meet someone in his office', from which they would never return.

[Wolfbane]

"You can wish for almost anything and get it right now. Money, toys, better clothing. Just about anything." He says with a smile. "It's because of the holiday. It's Thanksmasnewyearskwanzaakkah! It lasts over a month."

[TechnoScrabble]

Riley looks as if he just got a surprise he has no emotion towards whatsoever.
"Oh."
He thinks for a moment.
"Can I...Uh...Can I have someone to live with? Not like when I lived with Father Face, or Trog's, because Mr. Cosmo said a bar shouldn't be my home, especially since I order 'so many gorram orders of bamhacon. It's just...you walk around, you see people sharing a housing unit...and it seems fun to have somebody to talk to every day when you wake up. Someone who isn't drunk, I mean."

[Wolfbane]

Wolfy ponders for a moment and if TS decides this to be canon, Riley will find himself transported here. There should be plenty of children for him to be friends with there.

[TechnoScrabble]

Riley is teleported through the power of THANKSMAS CHEER.
What, you think Wolfy's godpowuh did it?
Naaaah.

[happyturtle]

A wild Moff appears!

Er, make that a Moffette, from the genderbending die roll at AMEN. She apparently stopped to go shopping for clothes and is dressed as a Thanksmas angel.

Spoiler

She sits on Wolfy's lap, but gets a little distracted admiring his bare torso.

[Wolfbane]

The wolf-god raises an eyebrow, ears perking before he wraps an arm around the "angel's" waist. "Well, well, well...and what do you want for Thanksmas, my dear?" He probably knows that its really a Moff, but the big question is, does Wolfy care?

[Gulaghar]

Oh dear lord, Moff. No, I refuse to type this.

...

Fine. Look at that, Moffette 8 has appeared as well. Instead of an angel outfit, however, she's wearing a devil's outfit.

Spoiler

Rather than a pitchfork, she has her Dice of Wonder cane. Ooh, ooh, she wants to be next! Waiting patiently sucks.

[happyturtle]

Angel Moffette is about to request something incredibly forum inappropriate, when Devil Moffette appears.

Giving the most pure and innocent smile ever, she points to the die cane Devil Moffette is holding. "I want that, Wolfy Claws."

[Wolfbane]

Wolfy smirks and snaps his claws. Demon Moffette should suddenly appear on his lap as well, and if allowed, the cane should be in Angel's hand. "Hm. Sorry about that. You know how it is with teleportation." He says innocently even though he keeps a paw around Angel. "So, what do you want for Thanksmas?" He asks Demon with a wink.

[Gulaghar]

A look of most profound loss passes over Moffette's face as his precious cane is lost. D= He's quickly distracted by Wolfy's rockin' bod though. Ogle ogle ogle.

"Well I've been very, very naughty this year, but I want a cane just like the one I had." Die included of course. "Except make it a cane sword too." This is the best plan. But back to more important matters. Ogling.

[happyturtle]

Moffette 4 squee's in joy and wiggles happily before throwing her arms around Wolfy Claws and giving him a very enthusiastic thank you kiss.

And then waving the cane at Moffette 8.

Originally Posted by Die Roll

12: The target start to sweat healing potions until the dice is used again.

I do not have the table of effects! =O

Edited!

[Wolfbane]

Wolfy chuckles and takes out another cane from the gift bag and hands it to the new Moffette. "Try not to beat each other up too much."

[Gulaghar]

Oi, Moffette isn't the only one that gets a kiss. Moffette gets one too! Wolfy gets a second kiss, and everyone knows devils are better kissers.

And now... sweating healing potions. O.o This cannot stand! The fancy new cane is waved at Moffette.

72 The target gets pinkeye

Now that's just mean. Anyway, time to get off Wolfy's lap. Other people are bound to want a turn. Besides, there's a Moffette to flee.

[happyturtle]

"Eww, I'm not touching him while he has those curves. You, on the other hand..."

Moffette rubs at her eye, not yet realizing it's an infection and not just a random itch, but shows no signs of getting down. She wants some hawt Thanksmas action, dammit!

[Kris on a Stick]

"Did someone say 'Hawt Thanksmas Action'?"

Kal leans against one of the gingerbread buildings, occasionally sparing a sympathetic glance at the poor doomed devils frolicking past, carrying toy parts or other instruments of glee and waving them about in forced revelry.
There's some things you just don't do.

He, of course, is wearing a Santa suit of his own! Except, you know, not.

[Wolfbane]

Wolfy flicks his claws to get rid of the pink eye and healing potion sweat. After all, it wouldn't be good if either of those conditions spread around. Not on Thanksmas of all days! The God looks at Kal with a slight smirk. "Perhaps, but if neither of those Moffs are in on it, I wouldn't be surprised if their brains exploded." Surely he's exaggerating.

Everyone knows Moffs don't have brains.

[Gulaghar]

Oh hey, it's Kal. Moffette has suddenly decided not to leave and let other people have their fun. Too much concentrated sexy in this area. Ogling. Dammit, Moffette, get a hold of yourself. 4 more than fills the Moff debauchery quota.

[Reinholdt]

Well Wolf's lap is full, so Ilpholin elf hops in Kal's. She's dressed in her ribbons. Two of them. Kind of like a bikini, but more scandalous somehow.

Course she's also freezing, so scoots close to the devil to warm up.

"Me next!"

[happyturtle]

Moffette ogles Kal, but then Ilpholin spoils the view. So she turns back to Wolfy and suggests and and .

She'll reluctantly allow Moffette 8 to join in if Wolfy insists, but he better not expect them to actually touch or anything.

[Wolfbane]

Wolfy chuckles. "Maybe later, ladies. But I think it's someone else's turn for a wish. I'll probably grant yours later." He says with a wink.

[Gulaghar]

Moffette 8 totally wants in on this! But Wolfy is teasing them. D= The horror! "I'll be waiting." He winks back, kinda like this.

[happyturtle]

Damn. That's what Moffette gets for asking for the die cane first! But she reluctantly gets down to find a hunky elf who is handing out hot cocoa.

There better be a hunky elf handing out hot cocoa.

[Slii Arhem]

Of course there's a hunky elf handing out cocoa! Well that depends on your definition of elf... and hunky.

But nonetheless, Kirk Junior is here to save the Moffettes from the cold forbidding place that is Thanksmasnewyearskwanzaahkah-Town. With a raft of alcohol-spiked chocolate goodness in his hands and an extremely cheezy fake santa beard on his face, Junior Claus is the rabid, frothing and extremely irritable bringer of Holiday Cheer (TM) that you never knew you wanted.

"Phefin' wee ahnkl-gnawurs an' yer harh gaahn dern teef. Ere's yehr bluudin cocoa yah frahllun bathrads."

[happyturtle]

"I'm confused," Moffette says. "Are you hitting on me or insulting me?"

Player is confused too. v.v

[Kris on a Stick]

Suddenly, Ilpholin. Of course, given that Kal is standing, not sitting, Ilpholin might find hopping into his lap a little difficult. Luckily, his reflexes are such that he manages to catch Ilpholin, instead of letting her drop into a heap into the snow. Which would be terrible.
"Um... I think Wolfy's being Santa right now. He's the one with the bag, anyway. And the Godly powers that allow him to summon anything he wants. And the chair." Totally not jealous!

Out of interest, is this pre-tail or post-tail Ilpholin?