Roleplaying GamesThe all-purpose forum for general advice or system-independent (or multi-system) discussion. Come discuss adventure plots, gamemastering dilemmas, or player advice here. For ruleset-specific discussions, see the subforums.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by eulmanis12
Yes there is, I just made it.
Bag of Hold 'em
weight: 1/2 lb
value: 500 gp
properties:once per encounter the player may reach into the bag of hold 'em and withdraw a deck of cards, a game of texas hold 'em immediatly begins with all sentient creatures within 20 ft participating unless they pass a DC 50 will save. Ante starts at 1 gp. During the game the 5 cards in the center will magicaly conform to whatever the owner of the bag wishes them to be, however they will not change value once flipped face up thus, to the casual observer the owner of the cards will not appear to be cheating.
Pretty sure the value of that would be much more than 500 GP. Willing to say that it's actually bordering on minor artifact level…
__________________
Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 Internet(s) and 2 Win(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Welknair
*Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* When facing multiple enemies, who all happens to have long beards, Dwarf and Human aren't allowed to tie thier beards together
** No, it doesn't give them "secret maneuovers of Beard Fighting Style"
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Olinda, halfling rogue, closed her eyes and ignored the recriminations of her companions. They were blaming her. Of course. Just like they always did. How often, HOW OFTEN, did she have to explain to them that she wasn't a trapfinder? That wasn't her specialty! She didn't get past traps by finding them and disabling them, she did it by talking their owners into turning them off! THAT was her specialty! But apparently this wizard had some spell going (according to Arcanus the Wise, stupid name but you can't always pick your coworkers) that let him see through any lies she told.
Which explained why four out of five of their number were up to their necks in solid stone. Moments before, it had been mud. Moments before that, it had been stone. The fifth, the monk Angle, had drawn the iron golem (complete with armor spikes) away from his helpless friends to a corner of the wizard's "throne room" to deal with on his own. Olinda knew that Angle could draw the fight out a nice long time, but only because their foe was sitting back and laughing at their predicament. Once he started casting spells again it would be all over.
"Shut up," Olinda hissed to her companions, who saw nothing more productive to do with their time than to blame her for their predicament. "Shut up if you want me to get us out of this."
"How?" demanded Oran Thorson, with biting sarcasm. She ignored him.
"How?" asked Grunk. Grunk, in Olinda's mind, was the smartest of their crew, in that he knew the limitations of his mental capacities. Smartest not counting her, of course. So when he asked, it wasn't sarcasticly.
"Fly fishing," she told him. And then, without giving them time to further question her instruction to shut up, she hollered at the wizard. "Hey! You! Yeah, you, the robed moron!"
This drew another round of laughter from the wizard. "You're up to your neck in stone and I'M the moron?"
"You made that big hulking liability, didn't you? Probably from some manual based on Gann the Blue's work?"
"Never heard of him. It was Abindra the Wise."
Abindra the wise? REALLY? What WAS it with these spellslingers, anyway. But there wasn't time to think about that. Instead, Olinda hooted with laughter. "Abindra? ABINDRA? That's even worse! What an imbecile!"
His face darkened. Feeble taunts were one thing, but the repetition was getting him angry. Good. The fish was angry, now to get it hooked. "I'm a thousand times more intelligent than you, wretch! I am a GENIUS! And once I crush the last of you pitiful bugs-"
"Oh, sure, right, genius. THAT'S a laugh. I bet you didn't even remove Abindra's master command words when you built your golem -- for now -- exactly to her specifications. Shall we find out?"
The wizard's brow furrowed. "What master command words?"
"She put them into all her tomes. They let her take command of any golem made from them! And you... you CRETIN!... you left them in!"
The wizard snorted. Right. The spell told him she was lying. She hadn't come right out and SAID those command words existed at first, so his spell hadn't registered a lie. But he'd realized it and prompted her into something more. "You're bluffing!"
"You really think so?"
"Yes!"
Olinda sneered back. "Want to bet? Are you willing to stake your life on that?"
"Yes!"
A crash came from the side. Angle had been cornered and was entirely on the defensive. Time was running out.
Olinda pitched her voice higher. Shout, shout, shout. More volume the better. Enough to be heard over the ruckus in the corner. "Really? Really? You think you're calling a bluff?"
"YES! Do your best! Try it and be damned!"
"Wow. Just.... WOW. You're really commanding -- COMMANDING -- that I should take COMPLETE, TOTAL, and IRREVOKABLE control of that golem AWAY from you, FOREVER, with a single word?"
"YES!!!!"
Olinda's face relaxed into a smile that was entirely, ENTIRELY, to big for the comfort of anyone who knew her. "Thank you!" she sang out cheerfully. "Iron golem! Restrain your former master. And break his moronic arms and jaw if he casts a spell."
========================================
* No longer allowed to cause the DM severe injury through autoreflexive facedesking. (This may already be on the list.)
(This didn't actually happen, but it would be pure awesome if it did.)
__________________
Nonono... I'm not an evil DM... HONEST!
============================= Private Mind, a long-form alternate history steampunk dystopian noir-detective story about telepaths, written for The CHALLENGE.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by blackjack217
*fighting with your off hand just so you can say "I am not left handed" is considered bad form
*If you do so you're opponent will reveal that he is not left handed either.
*I have not developed an immuntity to Black Lotus Extract
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
I am no longer allowed to create a small society of insane sewer mutants selectively named the Lords of the Sewers who's various divisions (divided by separate encounters) are the Lords of Furniture, the Lords of Clothes, and the Lord of Weapons.
I am also not allowed to have this be an actual integral part of the BBEG's villainous plot.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Man on Fire
* I have to tell rest of the party that Frenzied Berserker I'm making may turn on others after failed Will save, before they pick up classes that don't know a single spell, power or ability that could stop her.
50ft move speed and lots of taunting.
Edit: Ooh! May also Bluff the berserker into believing that an opponent has fast healing or other regeneration that requires her to keep hacking at it even after it's down. May not work more than once...
Last edited by Sutremaine : 07-21-2012 at 02:21 PM.
Reason: spelling
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by boomwolf
*I may never again equip multiple intelligent items with high ego scores to counterbalance each other.
On a similar note:
My CG rogue may not wield a LG Holy Avenger and an intelligent weapon who is actually a polymorphed CE demon and use the fact that I'm holding both to become a god.
Especially since this is back in 2nd Edition where UMD doesn't allow me to fake alignments (rogues could only fake it to cast scrolls).
__________________
Avatar courtesy of Thormag.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeff the Green
Also remember that you can have a True Neutral character that believes in things like truth and love and altruism and fluffy bunnies so long as he's willing to murder, lie, torture, and decapitate kittens to achieve them.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*My dragon bloodline sorcerer/dragon disciple is not "the one they fear."
*In their tongue, he is not Dhovakiin, Dragonborn.
*The verbal components of his spells never consist of "Fus," "Roh," or "Dah."
*He may never hire a band of Savage Skalds to follow him around singing in a vaguely Viking-ish language whenever he spots a dragon.
__________________
Avatar by the incomparable Herpestidae.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flickerdart
Fortunately, a Monk 1/Warblade 19 uses Iron Heart Surge to end the Monk character class, and the day is saved.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
May no longer create a swordsage with AC so high that he couldn't hit himself even if he tried.
May no longer have AC higher then 20 on the second level.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fibinachi
Hey, if the cost of that particular paladin in that particular scenario is falling...
... then I intend to so hard and so fast that the impact carries me and the cleric through the core of the planet and out the other side, streaking blood, grit, gore, law, evil, good and the precepts of my convictions far, far behind me. If being a rapidly moving comet soaring across the multiverse is the price one must pay to defeat a demigod of Evil, then that'll be the price.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*No, you cannot use the flimsiest grounds to declare yourself to be as gods.
**If you are somehow able to follow this up and become supreme ruler of most of the material world, challenging the heavens is a bad idea.
***Look! You know all those books and television shows with those vast and powerful empires that no longer exist for seemingly no reason? That's why!
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*I will not abuse stacking luck modifiers to ensure a natural 20 on all rolls. (this is using the old 3.0 luck modifier, where it actually changed the dice, not the final score)
**Using said luck modifiers in negatives to force natural 1 rolls for anything trying to to me any harm is even worse.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* I may not equip six weapons in two hands if their names are "shortsword", "shortsword", "bo bortsword", "bananafana fo fortsword", "me mi mo mortsword", "shortsword".
__________________ zimmerwald1915 made my avatar!
Spoiler
Quote:
This is the thief who likes to hoard,
That loves the bard with the puppet Lord
That admires the fighter with the green-hilted sword,
That employs the Wizard, whose bird is ignored,
That has the gender unexplored
That intrigues the Halfling, usually bored,
That slew a mountain of the goblin horde,
That follows the cleric,
That serves the lich,
That seeks the gate,
That guards the snarl,
That lives in the prison the gods built.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hyena
May not use a bag of marbles to defeat the big bad.
* May not use a bag of jumping jacks to defeat the big bad.
** May not use a bag of gumdrops to defeat the big bad.
*** May not carry any more bags, at all.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ksheep
Pretty sure the value of that would be much more than 500 GP. Willing to say that it's actually bordering on minor artifact level…
sorry about that. in the campaign I'm currently playing in, our DM has messed with the currency a little to make it more closly resemble medieval europe. Getting any money is rather difficult, and 500 gold crowns is a hefty sum of money.
for example our free company was paid just a single crown per man for participating in a major battle.
__________________
Warning!! This poster makes frequent use of Sarcasm, Jokes, and Exaggeration. He intends no offense.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by eulmanis12
sorry about that. in the campaign I'm currently playing in, our DM has messed with the currency a little to make it more closly resemble medieval europe. Getting any money is rather difficult, and 500 gold crowns is a hefty sum of money.
for example our free company was paid just a single crown per man for participating in a major battle.
Ah, well that makes sense then. So would the conversion rate there be something like 1 standard D&D gold = 1 campaign copper?
__________________
Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 Internet(s) and 2 Win(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Welknair
*Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tantaburs
Quote:
Originally Posted by blackjack217
*fighting with your off hand just so you can say "I am not left handed" is considered bad form
*If you do so you're opponent will reveal that he is not left handed either.
*I have not developed an immunity to Black Lotus Extract
*I do not not believe in Dire Rats.
__________________ Many thanks to Ceika for my Avatar
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by eulmanis12
Yes there is, I just made it.
Bag of Hold 'em
weight: 1/2 lb
value: 500 gp
properties:once per encounter the player may reach into the bag of hold 'em and withdraw a deck of cards, a game of texas hold 'em immediatly begins with all sentient creatures within 20 ft participating unless they pass a DC 50 will save. Ante starts at 1 gp. During the game the 5 cards in the center will magicaly conform to whatever the owner of the bag wishes them to be, however they will not change value once flipped face up thus, to the casual observer the owner of the cards will not appear to be cheating.
**The face-down cards are not your "Portable Hole cards".
Quote:
Originally Posted by Riverdance
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tantaburs
Quote:
Originally Posted by blackjack217
*fighting with your off hand just so you can say "I am not left handed" is considered bad form
*If you do so you're opponent will reveal that he is not left handed either.
*I have not developed an immuntity to Black Lotus Extract
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Flame of Anor
Quote:
Originally Posted by Riverdance
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tantaburs
Quote:
Originally Posted by blackjack217
*fighting with your off hand just so you can say "I am not left handed" is considered bad form
*If you do so you're opponent will reveal that he is not left handed either.
*I have not developed an immuntity to Black Lotus Extract
*I do not not believe in Dire Rats.
*I may not rename my Bluff skill to "Blave".
* I may not wear a black mask at all times, claiming that it's stylish and extremely comfortable.
** May not insist that in the future, everyone will wear masks because of how comfortable they are.
__________________
Proud owner of: 0.36 0.43 Internet(s) and 2 Win(s)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Welknair
*Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ksheep
* I may not wear a black mask at all times, claiming that it's stylish and extremely comfortable.
** May not insist that in the future, everyone will wear masks because of how comfortable they are.
my name is not inigo montoya
*The BBEG did not kill my father
**He will not prepare to die
To avoid harming the sanity of the DM I can no longer:
* Cast flesh to stone on a annoying Druid
** Cast Rock to mud on a Druid statue
*** Scoop mud into little ceramic pots
**** Plant tree's in individual ceramic pots
***** Claim that I have helped them become one with nature
RSS Feeds: 
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
