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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ksheep
* I may not throw a Roc at the party, only for it to grab one of the party members and fly away.
** I may not then throw a White Dragon with Snatch at the party, just to have it grab the same party member and fly away.
*** May not use any monsters with the Snatch feat
**** May NOT throw Tucker's Kobolds at the party either.
***** That's it, no more hit and run tactics from monsters EVER
****** No having a phase spider which levels with the party randomly show up through out the campaign, maul the party, and then planeshift away before the party can kill it.
******* No using the threat of phase spiders to curb a party's metagaming.
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"Two elves walked into a bar. There's now a Bar Elf sub-race." -The Dungeon Master on Facebook: http://tinyurl.com/cczy9vg
You'd probably be best to take everything I say with a grain of salt. Unless we're arguing about alignment. In which case, you're wrong. Also, please wait a recommended 15 to 20 mins before quoting me. I edit.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by BootStrapTommy
****** No having a phase spider which levels with the party randomly show up through out the campaign, maul the party, and then planeshift away before the party can kill it.
******* No using the threat of phase spiders to curb a party's metagaming.
******** Not allowed to make a Phase template to make combat more… interesting
9x* NO, YOU CANNOT MAKE A PHASE-TARRASQUE!!!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Welknair
*Proceeds to google "Bride of the Portable Hole", jokingly wondering if it might exist*
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*May no longer specialize in one thing to the exclusion of others.
**Especially if that one thing is magic.
***If the above rules are disregarded, I may not use any variant of an anti-mundane field.
****If the above is disregarded, I may not summon magic immune constructs to do my fighting.
*Any form of stealth attacker is not to be used on other players.
**If said stealth attacker uses suicide attacks, then it is to be considered banned.
***Shape-shifting suicide attackers are right out.
****May no longer apply the stealth prefix to a construct whose only attack results in the elimination of city blocks.
*****May no longer hold the ability to make combat constructs remotely.
******May no longer hold the ability to make combat constructs.
*Even if it fits perfectly within my philosophy of combat, I may not alpha strike in pvp.
**I may also not use attacks which will kill without a chance of retaliation, but which are not alpha strikes, in pvp.
***May no longer attack other players remotely.
****May no longer attack other players from stealth.
*****I must give at least three round's notice before attacking.
******The notice must be clear.
*******I may no longer attack other players outside of self-defense.
********No more self defense for me.
*May no longer leave misleading hints regarding future strategies in this thread to trap metagamers...
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*I may not have a method of destroying dieties with more divine ranks than I have levels.
**This method must not be reliable
*I am no longer capable of having a one turn attack routine that takes longer to write out than another player's character sheet.
**especially as a fighter 1
***Hell, even as a wizard 20 it's frowned upon.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*Just because as a Goliath your Great Crossbow does 3d8 damage and almost weighs as much as the elf does not make it "effectively a Ballista".
**Just because you crit with it doesn't mean that that gnome "circumnavigated the globe".
***Just because the Wizard cast Persistent Greater Enlarge Person on you, doesn't means a Ballista is "effectively a Hand Crossbow".
****Or that that watchtower is "effectively a warmace".
*Just because your epic level Knight gets Loyal Beyond Death, doesn't mean your -364 HP walking corpse can continue on a mad quest to avenge the party.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dimers
That would be Rikki-tikki-tavi, I believe. Kipling FTW.
You just blew my mind.
__________________
"Two elves walked into a bar. There's now a Bar Elf sub-race." -The Dungeon Master on Facebook: http://tinyurl.com/cczy9vg
You'd probably be best to take everything I say with a grain of salt. Unless we're arguing about alignment. In which case, you're wrong. Also, please wait a recommended 15 to 20 mins before quoting me. I edit.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* When interrogating an NPC for information, I may not convince the party to dress up as the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and Future.
** I may not dress up as the Ghost of Christmas Future.
*** If above rule is broken, I may not point and glare at said NPC.
**** If above rules are broken, a nat 20 Intimidation roll will not give said NPC a heart attack.
***** I may not point and glare at a crowd of random NPCs.
****** I may not point and glare at anyone. Period.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* Double finger points are reserved for FBI agents.
** No, you may not play as FBI agents.
*** Less known federal agencies are out of the question.
**** Made up federal agencies will be vetoed.
***** If you really want to play as federal agents, I know a guy who can hook us up with "Bureaucracy: the Game"
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*If I'm playing a cleric and the party rogue needs healing in the middle of combat the proper response is not to throw him in my bag of holding so I can deal with him later.
**Nor is it to throw him into my portable hole.
***If I throw him into my bag of holding while conveniently forgetting he is carrying his portable hole I am not to be surprised when we both get sucked into the Astral Plane and are surrounded by angry natives.
****If I throw him into my portable hole while he is carrying his bag of holding I am not to be surprised when he comes back as a major deity leading an army of millions of said natives bent on my destruction.
*You know what, how about you just heal yourself.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* If it annoys me that one of my PCs keeps referring to his manhood as his "Bag of Holding" I am to respond in a mature and polite manner.
** Even when he hits on female NPCs by asking if he can get inside her "Portable Hole."
*** Allowing him to have sex with one of these NPCs and then castrating him with a resulting rift into the astral plane is neither mature nor polite.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Craft (Cheese)
* If it annoys me that one of my PCs keeps referring to his manhood as his "Bag of Holding" I am to respond in a mature and polite manner.
** Even when he hits on female NPCs by asking if he can get inside her "Portable Hole."
*** Allowing him to have sex with one of these NPCs and then castrating him with a resulting rift into the astral plane is neither mature nor polite.
*Having a stilled, Silenced Programmed Amnesia put on him by said NPC to write his whole life story in his mind to be nothing more then to serve her ever again, is also not mature and polite, but more creative then killing him, and fun.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
I may no longer use more than high school level chemistry while making decisions on how things interact with the world.
I may also not use physics higher than you would find in a fifth grade science text while making such decisions.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jeff the Green
Also remember that you can have a True Neutral character that believes in things like truth and love and altruism and fluffy bunnies so long as he's willing to murder, lie, torture, and decapitate kittens to achieve them.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Any time I wish to incorporate real world science into fantasy planning, I must be able to demonstrate the science in front of the group.
If this takes longer than six seconds, it is over a full round action, and provokes attacks of opportunity.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Yes. I would think that's the simplest accurate answer to that question.
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Most people see a half orc and and think barbarian warrior. Me on the other hand? I think secondary trap handler and magic item tester. Also I'm not allowed to trick the next level one wizard into starting a fist fight with a house cat no matter how annoying he is.
Yes I know it's sarcasm. It's a joke.
Thread wins: 1
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Acanous
Any time I wish to incorporate real world science into fantasy planning, I must be able to demonstrate the science in front of the group.
If this takes longer than six seconds, it is over a full round action, and provokes attacks of opportunity.
So you need to generate gunpowder in less than 6 seconds in order to produce it in game?
Fatigue makes me wax philosophic and/or babble. If I've posted something strange and tangential, that is probably the cause. This entry would be an example.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Acanous
Any time I wish to incorporate real world science into fantasy planning, I must be able to demonstrate the science in front of the group.
If this takes longer than six seconds, it is over a full round action, and provokes attacks of opportunity.
So, if I need to demonstrate that a lightning bolt does indeed turn water into Hydrogen and Oxygen, do I need to acquire a river and a lightning bolt in those 6 seconds? Or are the 6 seconds only after acquiring all materials my PC already has?
Or do you mean explaining the theory? In such a case, up to how technical can I get?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SSGoW
95% of martial problems can be solved by Tome of Battle...
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
I believe he's not requiring all scientific theories from being expressed inside of six seconds, so much as capping how much jargon and theoretical planning one can fit into a conversation with fellow team-mates while also avoiding getting Inez's face chewed off by assorted gribblies.
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"Not trusting me might be the smartest decision you made since getting off of your horse."
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*I may no longer collapse an entire mountain on a dragon's head with a couple hundred gallons of oil and a 7th-level wizard.
**I am definitely not allowed to quote Heath Ledger's Joker afterwards.
*My solution to destroying an entire enemy fleet should not be intricately designing the magi-punk equivalent of Dreadnought.
*My solution to killing the king should not be preempted by me designing the world's first IED.
*I am no longer allowed to use anything in game that I have drawn schematics for.
*I am no longer allowed to utter the words "I have a cunning plan". Ever.
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On creating medieval thermobaric detonations:
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* BBEG does not get villain song to explain his motives
** He doesn't summon a rock band from other time to perform it
*** If that song is Sabaton's We Burn or Carolus Rex I'm buying everybody a beer.
*** Megadeath's Prince Of Darkness isn't a good way to reveal the bad guy is really the Devil himself.
* Genies aren't fans of metaphors
** I'm about to stop calling Gm a killer for that time my bard asked for "heart of fire and nerves of steel".
High five if you get the refference in that last one.
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