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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*I am never, ever allowed the use of the spells Grease and Animate Rope, in combination or otherwise, ever again. Ever.
*In an associated and perfectly justified ruling, bosses are not to be defeated by sapping their will to live and then removing their organs from their still-weeping husk.
*In an associated, perfectly justified and pre-emptive ruling, this also goes for mooks of all kinds, NPCs in general, and, look, just anything that it would be possible to defeat in such a manner.
*And anything that it isn't possible to defeat in such a manner, just in case.
*If the DM introduces a powerful NPC who is going to stop us from being killed by the hordes of ravenous demons we've drawn to ourselves, we are not to turn them to stone.
*We are certainly not to use the resulting statue to fight off the demons anyway.
* "We didn't know it was going to be turned to stone when we activated the Rod of Wonder" is a condemnation, not a legitimate excuse.
*Animal Husbandry checks are not the solution to every problem, even if I am playing a character based on 8-Bit Theatre's Red Mage.
*While they are, factually speaking, the beginning of every problem for our enemies, this is no more acceptable.
*Animal Husbandry isn't even a skill.
*No, you cannot refluff your Bardic Knowledge checks like that.
*Nor your Dark Knowledge checks.
*Animal Husbandry is banned in all forms, for the sake of the DM's mental well-being.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*As a DM, I am not to make a game that starts with the characters in a dungeon with nothing but a set of ring gates, at the mercy of an insane intelligent trap that spans the entire dungeon.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Randomguy
*As a DM, I am not to make a game that starts with the characters in a dungeon with nothing but a set of ring gates, at the mercy of an insane intelligent trap that spans the entire dungeon.
Of course not! They should have to make it through several rooms worth of puzzles and traps before they find the ring gates.
Hurray for Portal.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*I am not allowed to make a level one character that carries an entire party full of level fives.
*I won't fend off an entire strike force of orcs with one non-damaging spell again.
*The party does not appreciate my paladin leading them into a death trap simply by virtue of being too LG.
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78% of all DM's start their first campaign in a tavern. If you're among the 22% who didn't, copy and paste this into your signature and tell us where you DID begin.
The party wakes up underground, in a massive library, with no clue where they are or how they got there.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blisstake
*I may not continuously swing my sword at atoms until I roll a natural 20 and create a nuclear explosion.
Unless you're level is very high or your weapon has the fission quality, you won't do any damage. The strong nuclear force gives them a high D.R
*Cannot wield a natural weapon that isn't attached to me.
*No, duct tape will not let me do that.
*Cannot make a mecha out of the monster's bisected corpses without relevant ranks in nechrotech.
*Cannot rocket jump using a fireball.
*Cannot sticky jump using a delayed-blast fireball.
* Cannot wield 3 swords in each hand and one in my mouth.
*this dos not mean I can weild 6 swords in one hand and three in my mouth.
*Jotengrip be dammed, this still applies to battleaxes and all other weapons.
* I will be rewarded for having the character quirk "draws his sword at the first sign of trouble" in Mousguard, but I should not expect similar results if I try this in shadowrun.
*Especially if I do this in respone to a troublesome letter.
*Cannot perform a single-stroke battle with an owl.
* Not to scream out CRAAAAAAAAAB! if we are just encountering a normally-sized one.
*Even if we're mice and so it's 5 times our size and ravenous.
* If we enter a tunnel system, and come to a fork in the path, we cannot use the markings from our pathfinder session to find the right way.
*This also means we cannot end up in a crossover with them.
*Especially not as the slime rats from the last session that were kicked and exploded.
* If the young hotblooded mouse charges into the light, he cannot blame me when he end out sailing through the air into the ocean.
*It is not in the Nature of a mouse to be able to bisect a serpent in one strike, redwall be damned.
*Cannot play as a mice who was cursed by a war god to have a fit of rage that killed his family.
*Perticually if this same mouse is white-furred with read streaks going over his eye, and who wields two fish-hooks in battle.
*…for frik’s sake, YOU CANNOT BE MOUSE KRATOS!
*The mousguard rules state it takes 20000 mice to succeed in killing one black bear. This does not mean I can achieve the same thing using 2000000 ravenous tadpoles.
*It is beyond the ability of mouse society to develop a nuclear bomb for the purpose of killing bearthulhu.
*not to refer to bears as bearthulhu.
*Even if one is capable of eating the entire mouselands and dark rituals are held in order to plactate them.
* No matter what the scale rules indicate, cannot fit a mouse fortress on the back of a moose.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blisstake
*I may not continuously swing my sword at atoms until I roll a natural 20 and create a nuclear explosion.
*As objects, atoms aren't subject to crits.
*also, the spliting of single atoms wouldn't release much energy, anyway.
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Thanks to Kymme for the Evil Paladin Avatar!
Nicest thing said of me:
Quote:
Originally Posted by 'Able' Xanthis
This is what a properly motivated caster is like, people. Concussive explosions able to rip the front end of a hummer in twain and Chilling is using them to filter out those who don't make the cut. Those unworthy of his true magistic might.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*I may not use the Stronghold Builder's Guide and the fact that enhancements are based off of size to create nigh-invincible starfighters for less than 100k.
*I may not use the Ardent's Dominant Ideal to infinitely stack Empower Power.
*I may not use Rope Trick and Transdimensional Spell to attack without chance of harm.
*I may not play Spellblade Tennis with Transmute Mud to Lava to turn the world into Mustafar.
*I may not build mythals for the purpose of granting myself infinate Wish, Miracle and/or Reality Revision.
*I may not build mythals to get constant Timeless Body.
*I may not build mythals period.
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Avatar of Furude Setsuna, by Telasi.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mephit
Don't worry, I like my characters the way I like my coffee: Strong, but with no cheese in it.
"I'm prepared for anything! Unless one continues to fight without succumbing to the pain of defeat, it is impossible to achieve victory!"
-Hanyuu
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by Metahuman1
*Taming Bearthulu to be my mount is right out.
*Am not even to consider training Bearthulu to ride a mouse into battle.
*Warforged don't dream of metallic sheep.
*Sheering metallic sheep doesn't get you steel wool.
*Am not to make a fortune in the steel wool market by putting warforged to sleep.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*I cannot threaten players making "arrow in the knee" jokes with an arrow to the knee.
**Especially if I happen to have a 65 lb longbow and two dozen arrows on hand.
*I´m forbidden from discovering periodic table of elements in The Last Airbender universe.
**No, Avatar doesn´t have to master 118 styles of bending.
**There is no such thing as plutonium bender.
*If I am in a three-person party, I´m forbidden from introducing us as the good, the bad and the ugly.
**If I do, I am to assume I´m automatically the ugly.
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That which does not kill you has made a tactical error.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*I must remind the Storyteller of my fire-based contracts before she decides to incorporate vampires into the game.
*I may not scare the pants off the Queen of Autumn.
*(Irony) is not a legitimate Craft specialty, nor does is justify breaking the above rule.
*Just because a contract's catch is trivially easy to fulfil does not mean I can keep spamming said contract until it works.
**Especially not Fleeting Autumn 1.
***Especially not when the target is the Queen of Autumn.
*If the Storyteller informs me of various rumors my character has heard about an important NPC, the intent is for me to be impressed by said rumors, not to exploit them until the NPC is question is eating out of my hand.
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Revan avatar by kaptainkrutch.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cirrylius
That's how wizards beta test their new animals. If it survives Australia, it's a go. Which in hindsight explains a LOT about Australia.
Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* May not use epic magic to permasummon spellcasters just to make my rituals stronger.
* May not colossal wild shape and dragon wild shape to turn into a great wyrm prismatic dragon at level 24. PS, no primal elementals at level 23 either.
* May not use permanent skill boosting epic magic to buff spellcraft.
* May not use epic magic to origin of species a rapidly breeding creature loyal only to me to take over the world.
* May not play epic-level characters.
__________________
78% of all DM's start their first campaign in a tavern. If you're among the 22% who didn't, copy and paste this into your signature and tell us where you DID begin.
I started my players in a small town named cornbox ruled by the cult of a corn god. I actually statted up a corn elemental.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
