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Right, I think i've finished my entry. Nothing screams that it needs amending.
While i remember, Milo, why on earth would a Spider creature ever be "willingl to be dominated permenantly? There seems to be nothing in it for the spider and they're too stupid to make the conscious decision to lower their save, being mindless...
The capstone on your assassin makes no sense O.o
Firstly some spiderkind are sentient, not all are Monstrous Spiders. Secondly why do animals be willing animal companions? You can affect most of spider kind with Animal Handling as most are magical beasts so you can convince them to be friendly to youl. Also you could use Charm Monster on all of spidekind except for Monstrous. And lastly in my games you can use Handle Animal on vermin.
__________________ My Homebrew (180+ and still counting)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crasical
I once had a DM shoot down my wizard with an octopus familiar idea when I pointed out the ink loophole and declared my intention to escape bad situations by holding my pet above my head and shouting "BEHOLD, THE OCTOPUS!" before disappearing in a cloud of chemical darkness.
Firstly some spiderkind are sentient, not all are Monstrous Spiders. Secondly why do animals be willing animal companions? You can affect most of spider kind with Animal Handling as most are magical beasts so you can convince them to be friendly to youl. Also you could use Charm Monster on all of spidekind except for Monstrous. And lastly in my games you can use Handle Animal on vermin.
Okay...that answers none of my questions.
My best friend says that he'd like to magically dominate me to his will, forever. I ask what on earth is in it for me. He just shrugs. I refuse. Capstone doesn't work.
That covers all the sentient and charmed options. Don't work. There is no reason for anyone to agree to the ability being used on them.
You don't Dominate Animal Companions and they're more than able of disobeying you [as I've learned to my annoyance]. Okay, they're very amenable to doing what you tell them but that's something different.
Assuming that people use your houserules is a failure in design, especially in a competition. You have to assume that the core rules, as published, are those the recipient is using.
Make them Animal Companions, make it a summon ability, anything; as it is, the class feature just won't work; it's dominate that requires a willing recipient for no benefit to the victim. Not going to happen.
__________________
Mine is not so much a Peter Pan Complex as a Peter Pan Doom Fortress and Underground LairTM! Fae-o-matic Want a fae from folklore stated? Give me the lore and I'll do it for you! Le Cirque Funeste Evil Fairy Circus! Ray Bradbury, refined down to snortable powder!
My best friend says that he'd like to magically dominate me to his will, forever. I ask what on earth is in it for me. He just shrugs. I refuse. Capstone doesn't work.
That covers all the sentient and charmed options. Don't work. There is no reason for anyone to agree to the ability being used on them.
You don't Dominate Animal Companions and they're more than able of disobeying you [as I've learned to my annoyance]. Okay, they're very amenable to doing what you tell them but that's something different.
Assuming that people use your houserules is a failure in design, especially in a competition. You have to assume that the core rules, as published, are those the recipient is using.
Make them Animal Companions, make it a summon ability, anything; as it is, the class feature just won't work; it's dominate that requires a willing recipient for no benefit to the victim. Not going to happen.
Firstly you already can get Animal Companion as one of your techniques. Giving it as a capestone would be pointless and penalize anyone who already had it.
Secondly I didn't assue that people use that houserule thats why it was the very last of my points. If I thought that was a good enough reason for the whole thing it would've been my only point, but I knew that not everybody does it so it is of less relevance. Thus I placed it at the end.
Thirdly if you are friendly with a mindless creature via charm monster or a houserule they don't really care whether or not you dominate them. But this is a null point against the magical beast Spiderkind and I'm aware of that.
But I understand your overall point. I'll change it, abeit probably only slightly.
__________________ My Homebrew (180+ and still counting)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crasical
I once had a DM shoot down my wizard with an octopus familiar idea when I pointed out the ink loophole and declared my intention to escape bad situations by holding my pet above my head and shouting "BEHOLD, THE OCTOPUS!" before disappearing in a cloud of chemical darkness.
Alrighty, time for a run down on the prestige classes and racial feats for the Bastinoi.
Male
Rage: Why is it 3 per Class level and not 3+Con mod with additional being added per level like the Barbarian?
Feeding Frenzy: Does the Male have to be raging in order to use this ability?
Naseuating Pin: Could you explain the thought process behind this ability?
Female
Emergency Hatching/Reactive Hatching: How long do the swarms last? Do they always follow the female around and eventually mature for greater minionmancy?
Racial Feats
Defensive Clawwork: What exactly does this feat do?
Alrighty, time for a run down on the prestige classes and racial feats for the Bastinoi.
Male
Rage: Why is it 3 per Class level and not 3+Con mod with additional being added per level like the Barbarian?
Feeding Frenzy: Does the Male have to be raging in order to use this ability?
Naseuating Pin: Could you explain the thought process behind this ability?
The rage thing is because i didn't want to add Con score again if they were a Barbarian already but I wanted them to have a passable number of rounds to play with if they weren't. This way, there's a very slight advantage to being a Barbarian/Bastinoi Male, in order to make up for the loss of Tireless and Mighty Rage.
Edited Feeding Frenzy to say "until the end of the encounter" rather than that business about raging. Now you can use it outside a rage, but the bonus rounds are less useful [as an encounter is, like, 5 minutes outside combat].
The idea was that they basically crush the opponent in a certain way during the pin action to nauseate the victim with pain. This would leave them to do actual damage for at least one round without worrying about the enemy breaking free. I'm very much thinking it wasn't a particularly good ability. Probably replace it.
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Female
Emergency Hatching/Reactive Hatching: How long do the swarms last? Do they always follow the female around and eventually mature for greater minionmancy?
I'd not really thought of that... originally, i was just going to go with the mother eating them, like it would happen in nature but i guess i thought that was too...i dunno, real? Any suggestions?
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Racial Feats
Defensive Clawwork: What exactly does this feat do?
+2 AC if you're using manufactured weapons, the ability to enchant your claws and access to shield specific enchantments. I'll look over the wording again.
__________________
Mine is not so much a Peter Pan Complex as a Peter Pan Doom Fortress and Underground LairTM! Fae-o-matic Want a fae from folklore stated? Give me the lore and I'll do it for you! Le Cirque Funeste Evil Fairy Circus! Ray Bradbury, refined down to snortable powder!
The rage thing is because i didn't want to add Con score again if they were a Barbarian already but I wanted them to have a passable number of rounds to play with if they weren't. This way, there's a very slight advantage to being a Barbarian/Bastinoi Male, in order to make up for the loss of Tireless and Mighty Rage.
Edited Feeding Frenzy to say "until the end of the encounter" rather than that business about raging. Now you can use it outside a rage, but the bonus rounds are less useful [as an encounter is, like, 5 minutes outside combat].
The idea was that they basically crush the opponent in a certain way during the pin action to nauseate the victim with pain. This would leave them to do actual damage for at least one round without worrying about the enemy breaking free. I'm very much thinking it wasn't a particularly good ability. Probably replace it.
Alrighty.
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I'd not really thought of that... originally, i was just going to go with the mother eating them, like it would happen in nature but i guess i thought that was too...i dunno, real? Any suggestions?
Maybe she can eat them for a healing effect?
Quote:
+2 AC if you're using manufactured weapons, the ability to enchant your claws and access to shield specific enchantments. I'll look over the wording again.
6 entries is an amazing turn out for the first itteration of this contest, though I will admit that I'm sad to see that some folks didn't get a chance to end up submitting an entry this time around.
But who knows, we could still get an amazing, dazzling last minute entry!
I'll be in the Ravenloft Competition. I've just reserved space for my entry, which will be a class based around blood and knowledge.
Also good luck to all my fellow competitors for the first competition.
Edit: I've now added in the Sanguine Inquisitor's fluff.
__________________ My Homebrew (180+ and still counting)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crasical
I once had a DM shoot down my wizard with an octopus familiar idea when I pointed out the ink loophole and declared my intention to escape bad situations by holding my pet above my head and shouting "BEHOLD, THE OCTOPUS!" before disappearing in a cloud of chemical darkness.
Would an oracle mystery be an acceptable entry? Given that each mystery has ten revelations plus a capstone along with its skills and bonus spells, it would be more rules material than most races or a short PrC.
The idea behind my entry is a class which is like a Lovecraftian Templar from the middle ages who has power over blood. It starts off as a pure knight, and ends up as a corrupt paladin who believes he is still doing good.
Also, does the Sanguine Inquisitor's Code of Conduct seem to harsh?
__________________ My Homebrew (180+ and still counting)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crasical
I once had a DM shoot down my wizard with an octopus familiar idea when I pointed out the ink loophole and declared my intention to escape bad situations by holding my pet above my head and shouting "BEHOLD, THE OCTOPUS!" before disappearing in a cloud of chemical darkness.
Would an oracle mystery be an acceptable entry? Given that each mystery has ten revelations plus a capstone along with its skills and bonus spells, it would be more rules material than most races or a short PrC.
I put a lot of thought into allowing archetypes and things like Oracle Mysteries as general, "every contest" entries and got opinion from other contest runners and I came to the conclusion that they don't require the same amount of work as the other entry types.
Yes, they may have more rules text than some other entries, but they require less fluff work and less balancing. So while that's an idea for a contest all by itself, for the time being I'll have to say no.
I put a lot of thought into allowing archetypes and things like Oracle Mysteries as general, "every contest" entries and got opinion from other contest runners and I came to the conclusion that they don't require the same amount of work as the other entry types.
Yes, they may have more rules text than some other entries, but they require less fluff work and less balancing. So while that's an idea for a contest all by itself, for the time being I'll have to say no.
That's fair I suppose, although I question the assertion that an oracle mystery requires less balancing than a race - there's a lot more potential for variability in power and non-obvious brokenness with a mystery than with a race, since generally any way that a race is broken or otherwise off-target for power will be very up-front and straightforward.
That said, oracle mysteries are probably the meatiest category of "class builds" - things like domains, knightly orders, or sorcerer heritages have a lot less to them, so excluding the class-build category in general is understandable.
That's fair I suppose, although I question the assertion that an oracle mystery requires less balancing than a race - there's a lot more potential for variability in power and non-obvious brokenness with a mystery than with a race, since generally any way that a race is broken or otherwise off-target for power will be very up-front and straightforward.
The difference is that you need to balance the Mysteries with other Mysteries and with the Oracle class itself as compared to what you need to balance and build the other entries around.
I concede that there is some merit to what you're saying and that it is most certainly something that could be discussed at length, but for the time being archetypes and "class builds" won't be included as a staple entry category for the contest.
Quote:
That said, oracle mysteries are probably the meatiest category of "class builds" - things like domains, knightly orders, or sorcerer heritages have a lot less to them, so excluding the class-build category in general is understandable.
Well, if there any takers, I'm more than willingly to devote one of these contests solely to creating "class builds".
I concede that there is some merit to what you're saying and that it is most certainly something that could be discussed at length, but for the time being archetypes and "class builds" won't be included as a staple entry category for the contest.
Oh, yeah, sorry, I didn't mean to come off like I was trying to harass you into accepting class builds or whatnot. I just find races easier to balance because they're frankly a lot less complex than pretty much any other option at hand - base classes are a lot more content than a class build more or less by definition, and prestige classes about the same depending on the PrC length and the class-build type.
PrCs in a Pathfinder contest do seem a little weird to me since Pathfinder has overall moved away from the PrC as a standard build element, but that really just means that the PrCs need to be judged by Pathfinder's more-specialized PrC standards rather than the 3.5 "PrC for every occasion" standards. So, yeah, basically this is just me rambling on my thoughts about PF vs. 3.5 design, pay no mind.
Oh, yeah, sorry, I didn't mean to come off like I was trying to harass you into accepting class builds or whatnot. I just find races easier to balance because they're frankly a lot less complex than pretty much any other option at hand - base classes are a lot more content than a class build more or less by definition, and prestige classes about the same depending on the PrC length and the class-build type.
Well, while that is true, races need more serious fluff for them to compete as entries as you can see with the Theg or Bastinoi. So while they may be the easiest entry in some ways mechanically (since not everyone is good at building a balanced base race) they are most certainly the most flavor and fluff intensive in requirements.[/quote]
Oh, I know you weren't, I just didn't want to come off like I was rejecting it out of hand. It was, as I mentioned, something I put a lot of thought into when I was originally devising the PGBC and something I had originally hoped to include, but it just didn't seemed feasible or fair since those things always have a base class to rely back upon in the long run and other reasons I've mentioned.
Quote:
PrCs in a Pathfinder contest do seem a little weird to me since Pathfinder has overall moved away from the PrC as a standard build element, but that really just means that the PrCs need to be judged by Pathfinder's more-specialized PrC standards rather than the 3.5 "PrC for every occasion" standards. So, yeah, basically this is just me rambling on my thoughts about PF vs. 3.5 design, pay no mind.
Oh, I hear you. But that's exactly why I included them as an entry option since it would mean that they would be very specialized and unique instead of "Mash X Class with Y Class" or "Make Base Class A viable" or "Overpower the Caster more".
So Milo doesn't feel like I completely missed his post, here's the run down for Sanguine Inquisitor!
Fluff
Is the line about the mother protecting her children necessary? The other two examples don't have such specifications?
"An Inquisitor with blood" reads kind of odd to me.
I would reword this middle bit entirely. The first sentence is vague enough that from the fluff alone there's no designation between the "weak powers/strong powers" vibe you're trying to set up.
"in the later stages of the" what stages does that refer to?
Role
I feel that the last sentence is a little superfluous.
Religion
You forgot the apostrophe in "Inquisitor's".
I think you meant "good aligned god" and not "good aligned good".
Class Features
Blood Mark
The wording is a little clunky. I'd go more along the lines of "As a standard action the Sanguine Inquisitor may make a melee touch attack. If the attack is successful, the target is dealt 1d4 lethal damage as the target's blood is drained from them and suffuses the Sanguine Inquisitor. The Sanguine Inquisitor may instead choose to deal 1 nonlethal damage when using this ability.
The successful use of this ability grants the Sanguine Inquisitor a Blood Mark (determined by the creature's type and as noted below). The maximum amount of Blood Marks that a Sanguine Inquisitor is allotted is noted on the table above.
A Sanguine Inquisitor may only use this ability on the following creatures:
Aberrations
Animals
Dragons
Fey
Humanoids
Magical Beasts
Monstrous Humanoids
Outsiders (except those with the Elemental subtype)
Vermin
"
Blood Points
This ability should probably have a tag since Blood Mark did.
"Rest" covers both sleep and anything that isn't strenuous activity so the last part of the last sentence is a little redundant.
Blood Never Lies
You forgot the apostrophe in "target's".
I would suggest cleaning up the wording of this ability, it's a little clunky.
I think you meant "existence" not "existance".
Intuition
I think you meant "Intuition" not "Intution".
You forgot to capitalize Sanguine Inquisitor and Inquisitor in the second sentence.
Sanguine Gift
I think meant "This ability then acts as" not "This ability the acts as".
Sanguine Taint
I think meant "This ability then acts as" not "This ability the acts as".
Bane is a first level spell so the Save DC for this isn't any different than normal.
Smite Heretic
I think you meant "half his Charisma bonus" instead of "his half Charisma bonus".
I think you meant "a creature" not "an creature."
I think you meant "his smite" not "her smite".
The end of the fourth sentence is a little wordy and redundant. You probably only need up to "instead of only half".
I think you meant "his Charisma bonus" not "her Charisma Bonus"
The text in parenthesis in the third paragraph is redundant since "2 or lower" covers creatures with intelligence scores of "0" and "-".
I think you meant "may use Smite Heretic" instead of "may smite heretic".
Sanguine Trail
I think you meant "affects a creature the Sanguine Inquisitor" instead of "affects a creature Inquisitor".
I think you meant "then acts" not "the acts".
Bloodline Transfusion
I think you meant "as a full round action" instead of "a full round action". I also think something like "and, as a full round action, gains the traits" would sound better. Actually, I feel like you may want to reword this whole ability and clean it up.
Code of Conduct
I think you mean "Defenseless" not "Defenceless".
Well, that's the grammar bit for now.
I'll give a more complete run down when the class is complete and yes, I think the code of conduct is a little much and could use some further definition.
Yay!
Thanks to everyone who voted for me and Troll Bräu for the trophy.
__________________ My Homebrew (180+ and still counting)
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crasical
I once had a DM shoot down my wizard with an octopus familiar idea when I pointed out the ink loophole and declared my intention to escape bad situations by holding my pet above my head and shouting "BEHOLD, THE OCTOPUS!" before disappearing in a cloud of chemical darkness.
Well now this looks extremely interesting here - glad I rejoined in time for this! As someone who has a literal library full of this stuff that I've been tinkering with for a few years now. Heck, I've got a 40 page ebook on horrors and closet monsters - but that might go beyond the scope of this challenge, I presume. I guess the trick will be to choose the best of my best...
*cue glasses*
Challenge accepted
__________________ There is a theory which states that if ever anyone discovers exactly what the Universe is for and why it is here, it will instantly disappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable.
There is another theory which states that this has already happened.
-The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
Yay!
Thanks to everyone who voted for me and Troll Bräu for the trophy.
You're very welcome.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kane0
Woot!
Thanks all! I shall hold my trophy proudly!
You also, are very welcome!
Quote:
Originally Posted by TARDIS
Well now this looks extremely interesting here - glad I rejoined in time for this! As someone who has a literal library full of this stuff that I've been tinkering with for a few years now. Heck, I've got a 40 page ebook on horrors and closet monsters - but that might go beyond the scope of this challenge, I presume. I guess the trick will be to choose the best of my best...
*cue glasses*
Challenge accepted
As long as none of them have already been posted here or on another website for PEACHing or submission for some contest or something, you're free to submit one of them.
Here we are and it's the 12th and only one half completed entry. I hope things live-in up soon.
Alrighty, time for a run down on The Paranormal Seeker.
Fluff
I think you meant "It's a big world" not "Its a big world".
Role
The grammar of the first sentence is wonky. You have Paranormal Seeker as a singular term at the beginning and then have Melee Fighters at the end, which would entail the subject being plural.
Range isn't really a proper noun, so it shouldn't be capitalized.
Magic Device Affinity
For some reason I just feel like if you capitalize Arcane, then arts should be as well or both should be uncapitalized.
"Item" isn't exactly a proper noun in this case so it probably shouldn't be capitalized.
Deceive Magical Device
Again, not really sure on "Item" being a proper noun.
Circumvent Defenses
You didn't mention what level this was gained at.
Discern Truth
I think you meant "At 10th level, the Paranormal Seeker".
"Illusions" looks like it would be better off as just "Illusion" with how you've worded the sentence.
Alrighty, now that the grammar is all said and done, let's move on to my thoughts and questions!
Hehe. Harry Dresden?
Just a small thing, because otherwise the entry is fine, but could you possiblely play up the Horror angle more in the fluff? It sounds kind of Buffyish when the mood is more Hellboy/Lovecraftian.
Track? Really? I mean, that's kind of a craptastic entry requirement in all honesty, especially since it's just Railroading in feat form. It's makes sense and all with the class' flavor, but still.
What class do you see as being the best entry for this class? The skills it gets read "Skill Monkey" to me but its skill points per level read "Barbarian".
I see 3 Dead levels. Dead levels are bad. This class is already very simple, straight forward and utilitarian for a non-caster so you could add in more features to make it unique. Maybe some "He who Fights Monsters" vibe?
I know that Spell Resistance is an Extraordinary special quality, but the rest of Annul Magic reads like it would be Supernatural. How do you envision this class feature functions as Extraordinary?
For Unnatural Lore, you should probably define what "monsters" encapsulates since Orcs, Drow and Kobolds are in the Bestiary too.
I like this Prestige class because it's so simplistic and something that you could see easily applied in any game, especially for people who build anti-casters. It's not overtly strong or unique though, so it makes me wonder if it could be condensed into some kind of Archetype.
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Re: Pathfinder Grab Bag Competition Chat Thread
By Aruius.
