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There should generally be consistent line width. And I probably wouldn't care if I didn't play violin.
Like this:
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Last edited by Cuthalion : 09-25-2012 at 08:11 PM.
There should generally be consistent line width. And I probably wouldn't care if I didn't play violin.
Like this:
Okay, I never did anything with stringed instruments. My Middle School kept the Band and Orchestra separate, so I hardly even saw them, let alone someone playing them. I was Clarinet...
Why does she have her finger around one of the pegs? I'm pretty sure that's not how you hold it, unless you're tuning it, and that's a really strange way to go about it.
(Also her chin is not resting on/gripping the violin. >.>)
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Why does she have her finger around one of the pegs? I'm pretty sure that's not how you hold it, unless you're tuning it, and that's a really strange way to go about it.
(Also her chin is not resting on/gripping the violin. >.>)
She is just getting ready to play it, still not playing it.
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@asdflove: Not a bad avi. I do have a few recommendations, however.
For one thing, the hair looks like it's intended to match her head facing forward. I would recommend making it so it doesn't cover so much of the left side of her face.
The dress looks a bit stiff. Perhaps have it flow with the motion of the picture more. (In the same direction of the magic and hair.)
The shoes look a bit big and clunky for what you're trying to draw. I recommend making them smaller, or perhaps not drawing shoes at all. Leaving out the shoes can often look better than including them, and I think this would be such a case.
The magic effect looks messy. Fewer and smoother curves in it might help. I'm not very fond of just using transparent blobs of colour for magic effects myself. There are just so many better ways to do it that look better in the end. For something like that... I'd have to experiment, but some kind of gradient transitioning into transparency with a bit of blur might look good. I'd definitely ditch the outlines in that case, too.
And lastly, I'd lower the breasts a bit. Just so they don't look like they're sticking out from just below her neck.
@asdflove: Not a bad avi. I do have a few recommendations, however.
For one thing, the hair looks like it's intended to match her head facing forward. I would recommend making it so it doesn't cover so much of the left side of her face.
The dress looks a bit stiff. Perhaps have it flow with the motion of the picture more. (In the same direction of the magic and hair.)
The shoes look a bit big and clunky for what you're trying to draw. I recommend making them smaller, or perhaps not drawing shoes at all. Leaving out the shoes can often look better than including them, and I think this would be such a case.
The magic effect looks messy. Fewer and smoother curves in it might help. I'm not very fond of just using transparent blobs of colour for magic effects myself. There are just so many better ways to do it that look better in the end. For something like that... I'd have to experiment, but some kind of gradient transitioning into transparency with a bit of blur might look good. I'd definitely ditch the outlines in that case, too.
And lastly, I'd lower the breasts a bit. Just so they don't look like they're sticking out from just below her neck.
Hair is supposed to be like it is. All intentional there.
Hair isn't really flowing, just hanging there. There wasn't even much to the dress to make flow, I like how it is really.
It bugs me for some reason when they don't have shoes, but I may make them smaller.
... Isn't this order of the stick style? In the comic, magic is just curvy transparent blobs of magic. Just look, for example, Tsukiko's magic, in comic 518 (Which happens to be the one I'm currently re-reading right now out of boredom.)
Like you said, it's pretty choppy, but that can't really be helped if you can't put up the .Swf (The link doesn't work for me, so I can't view it here or there)
However I can point out Four things.
One: You need to look into something called easing. The slow beginning and end of a movement. Even a very swift or repetitive, seemingly monotonous movement begins slowly and ends (then repeats) slowly.
Two: The right arm is going back with the right leg and the left arm is going back with the left leg. It's much easier to see if you play it slowly, but it is there, and kind of annoys my eyes. However, I look at lots of animations so I'm just being fussy
Three: The hair seems to wave back and forth randomly, it should, infact, move forwards and up a moment after the foot leaves the ground and start moving down once he is at the apex of each "leap", which brings me to the next, and last, thing.
Four: The legs seem to simply be moving back and forth. When someone/thing runs, he, she or it is actually performing many tiny, rappid jumps. Between each stride, your little avvy should rise up a tiny bit, when neither foot is on the ground.
I hope some of this helps, and that I'm not coming off as an ass, I just wanna help
On to my question, is it okay if I put up avvies here and ask how to improve them? I know most people give advice here, but I want to put it up with the specific purpose of getting help.
On to my question, is it okay if I put up avvies here and ask how to improve them? I know most people give advice here, but I want to put it up with the specific purpose of getting help.
Absolutely. That's basically the point. Go ahead.
Also, Tiffanie, the belt looks like it's around the legs, because it's way too low. The legs don't start right below the belt.
As for me, I made an avatar for someone, and I'm not perfectly satisfied with it. Can any of you see anything?
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Last edited by Cuthalion : 10-02-2012 at 11:45 AM.
1) The black outline of her head is visible through her hair. I would add more hair or remove that part of the outline.
2) The mouth is way too small. I'm horrible at open-mouthed smiles, so I'm not the best source of advice, but it should be way bigger with relatively few lines, so there's lots of white teeth showing.
3) Your boots are way too thin -- OotS-style shoes are either really clunky or nonexistent.
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Woah. That, there, is cool looking. But I have a critique:
It seems like the lines are all blurry, and the fingers have a shape that just doesn't seem right.
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The blurry lines have been Felyndiira's thing since as long as I can remember.
Also, for those of you that do colored eyes, can you show/tell me how you make them so that it doesn't look weird? Like width of stroke for eyes compared to stroke width used for the rest of the body? Does it have something to do with the size of the colored eyes?
I draw the eyes at 0.9 pixels, the head at 1.7 pixels, and most other parts of the avi at 1.4 pixels. The eye size pretty much hasn't changed since I copied Rich's eyes when I first started avataring.
After a long hiatus due to university making me start to partially dread drawing with technical drawing courses I'm now trying to start back by mainly doing the most work-related thing I can think of to make myself set time apart.
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asdflove: I see that and the only thing I think is, "Baby Haley? Baby Haley.. Baby Haley! Hey! Hey! Haley! Baby Haley!
'kay?
araveugnitsuga: Woooow, you're talented. Who'd have thought someone could make an "oots" style group of characters that I'd actually want to print and hang up on my wall? Jeepers creepers. Did you make those characters in your sig as well? For the banner? If so: You sir. Yes. It doesn't need to make sense.
So here's my first attempt at making an avatar for myself (which I'm putting up, the others were eyerape, so I didn't want to post them). I'm not sure if I particularly like this "style" yet (as in, as few black outlines as I can manage without it looking crappy). Mostly because I wouldn't be able to make it look.. I don't know, angry? Or evil? As the coloured outlines look so "happy". If anyone knows how to do it that way in more unhappy tones, I'd be very very appreciative of some tips.
PLEASE crit me, don't hold back. I've been on the internet for seven years now, I'm not going to get upset.
PLEASE crit me, don't hold back. I've been on the internet for seven years now, I'm not going to get upset.
Are you going for "No outlines" or just not black ones? If it is the latter you could use a darker shade than now to make them more distinct?
The legs and shields positioning could perhaps use a little work... The shield seem like a perfect circle, if you just skew it slightly to become a ellipse it would probably give a less flat impression.
I'm not certain what his stance is, is he crouching/jumping/running/stretching towards some foe/hindrance slightly above him? Or maybe even falling backwards while taking a swipe at the foe while going down? ...The last seem most likely ow when I think of it. If you tilt the body just slightly more backwards it would increase that impression.
Regarding the body, he seems to have too much torso compared to legs, making it a bit unbalanced. Compared to the head though the torso is not unreasonable (although perhaps slightly wide), so I'd suggest making the legs slightly longer if possible. The three heads high rule of thumb is useful although I prefer my legs slightly longer than that.
But overall I'd say it's certainly a competent attempt.
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Nice one Araveugenitsuga, I'd lower the child slightly though since the boots don't hit the floor compared to the adults (although I suppose they might be holding him into the air by the shoulders ).
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Last edited by Elder Tsofu : 10-09-2012 at 02:23 PM.
araveugnitsuga: Woooow, you're talented. Who'd have thought someone could make an "oots" style group of characters that I'd actually want to print and hang up on my wall? Jeepers creepers. Did you make those characters in your sig as well? For the banner? If so: You sir. Yes. It doesn't need to make sense.
Thanks. They aren't made for the banner so much as the banner being about what they were made for.
So here's my first attempt at making an avatar for myself (which I'm putting up, the others were eyerape, so I didn't want to post them). I'm not sure if I particularly like this "style" yet (as in, as few black outlines as I can manage without it looking crappy). Mostly because I wouldn't be able to make it look.. I don't know, angry? Or evil? As the coloured outlines look so "happy". If anyone knows how to do it that way in more unhappy tones, I'd be very very appreciative of some tips.
PLEASE crit me, don't hold back. I've been on the internet for seven years now, I'm not going to get upset.
You might want to darken the outlines slightly or use more saturated colours for them in relation to the fill. Using more saturated colours in general tends to take away the "happy" atmosphere into something slightly more aggressive, the use of darker hues also would help with that.
I heartily second the use of an ellipse for the shield instead of a circle for adding a perception of depth.
Apart from what Tsofu already said, I'd suggest making the shirt's neck more visible considering the current chest area showing appears to be intentional but not very clear and use of curvature in the body to better simulate the body movement.
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Originally Posted by Elder Tsofu
Nice one Araveugenitsuga, I'd lower the child slightly though since the boots don't hit the floor compared to the adults (although I suppose they might be holding him into the air by the shoulders ).
Thanks. I mainly did this with a height mark on the back, so I didn't really notice the discrepancy in feet height until you pointed it out, going to lower the boots to the ground to make it make sense.
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Re: OotS Style Art/Fanart Showcase V
Also, the smile lines are too thin.
. The smile lines are too thin?... They look fine to me... 
I've gotten so many random reference pictures from there...
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