Things I May No Longer Do While Playing IV: The Decanter of Endless Bad Ideas

[Kelb_Panthera]

Originally Posted by Doorhandle

wouldn't using strikes instead of full-attacks be counterproductive if you're using multi-weapon fighting?

One word, man: Tigerclaw.

The boosts for TWF'ers (or mutliweapon in this case) are just plain nasty if you're not used to that kind of blenderization.

[Bucky]

*I may no longer Charm members of the other team during a friendly soccer game.
*I am no longer allowed to protect the goal by shapeshifting into a form larger than it.
**Filling the entire goal box with magically grown, virtually impenetrable vegetation is right out.

(Needless to say, neither team scored after that)

[Ksheep]

Originally Posted by Bucky

*I may no longer Charm members of the other team during a friendly soccer game.
*I am no longer allowed to protect the goal by shapeshifting into a form larger than it.
**Filling the entire goal box with magically grown, virtually impenetrable vegetation is right out.

(Needless to say, neither team scored after that)

*** Casting Web is also disallowed

[Wookieetank]

Originally Posted by Bucky

*I may no longer Charm members of the other team during a friendly soccer game.
*I am no longer allowed to protect the goal by shapeshifting into a form larger than it.
**Filling the entire goal box with magically grown, virtually impenetrable vegetation is right out.

(Needless to say, neither team scored after that)

****Having the game suddenly transform into a game of quidditch is not entirely unexpected at this point.

[Adoendithas]

Originally Posted by Wookieetank

****Having the game suddenly transform into a game of quidditch is not entirely unexpected at this point.

***** Even so, I may not Persisted Mass Fly everyone.

[Black Mage]

Originally Posted by Kelb_Panthera

One word, man: Tigerclaw.

The boosts for TWF'ers (or mutliweapon in this case) are just plain nasty if you're not used to that kind of blenderization.

Tiger Claw, plus using feats to get Desert Wind boosts. Also, my redeemed Xill was wielding four +1 holy adamantine battleaxes. I made the DM cry.

[Wookieetank]

Originally Posted by Adoendithas

***** Even so, I may not Persisted Mass Fly everyone.

*+1: Mass summoning flying brooms is allowed and even encouraged though.

[Bucky]

*Being Nauseated does not entitle me to use vomiting as a breath weapon.
**If I somehow manage to hit an enemy with my vomit, it does not do acid damage.
**I may not use vomiting as a breath weapon even if I am not Nauseated.

[Dimers]

Originally Posted by Bucky

*Being Nauseated does not entitle me to use vomiting as a breath weapon.
**If I somehow manage to hit an enemy with my vomit, it does not do acid damage.
**I may not use vomiting as a breath weapon even if I am not Nauseated.

My tabletop 3.5 game is currently in a ruined temple half-filled with water befouled by mummies, zombie frogs and naga pee. If you slip and fall underwater, there's a chance you swallow some and have to make a save against nausea. So at one point recently, our game log mentioned a character "blowing bubbles and chunks".

[Techwarrior]

Originally Posted by Black Mage

Tiger Claw, plus using feats to get Desert Wind boosts. Also, my redeemed Xill was wielding four +1 holy adamantine battleaxes. I made the DM cry.

Thri-Keen sir. Thri-keen. Nothing beats jumping farther than you can run with Sudden Leap.

May not Sudden Leap to the enemy's archery specialist from the edge of his first range increment (who has Far Shot).
May not then use my Belt of Battle to activate Inferno Blade.
Afterwards, may not then use Time Stands Still, with 4 Keen Scimitars.

[Kelb_Panthera]

Originally Posted by Techwarrior

Thri-Keen sir. Thri-keen. Nothing beats jumping farther than you can run with Sudden Leap.

May not Sudden Leap to the enemy's archery specialist from the edge of his first range increment (who has Far Shot).
May not then use my Belt of Battle to activate Inferno Blade.
Afterwards, may not then use Time Stands Still, with 4 Keen Scimitars.

*If I make a character that is essentially a sapient blender, I must remember to only use the puree setting on BBEG's.

[Razanir]

* I may not use this thread as character inspiration

Also, can we switch back over to numbers next thread? Yes I realize that's a while away, but I miss knowing (roughly) how many bad ideas we've collectively had

[Ksheep]

I think the answer to "how many" is "far too".

Anyway, have a couple more:
* I may not make a Reverse Gravity trap in the middle of the town square
** Nor may I make a bunch of Darkness and Daylight traps scattered throughout the town
*** OK, no more traps in populated areas
**** No more traps, period

[Forrestfire]

*I will not let my player's Druid have a velociraptor for an animal companion.
**Even if they are a part of my campaign world.
***This character may not consider herself to be a velociraptor, and her companion to be her brother.
****The raptor's name may not be Jarvis.

...

*****This character will have difficulties in social situations when she refuses to leave the raptor outside of shops.

[tuggyne]

Originally Posted by Forrestfire

*****This character will have difficulties in social situations when she refuses to leave the raptor outside of shops.

****** "Jarvis, rip 'em to shreds" is not a suitable opener for Diplomacy.
******* Or Bluff.

[Socratov]

********it is however, perfectly suited for intimidate

[Crazyfailure13]

* I'm not to use the Cantrip Light for torturing goblins
** If I do and they come back for revenge, I'm not allowed to effortlessly slaughter all but one of them
*** I cannot recruit the last one alive into my party
**** especially if I convinced the DM to give him class levels
***** Even moreso if the DM let me write up the Goblins new character sheet
******said Goblin cannot then train the stableboy I bought in the art kungfu

[Giarc]

Originally Posted by Bucky

*Being Nauseated does not entitle me to use vomiting as a breath weapon.
**If I somehow manage to hit an enemy with my vomit, it does not do acid damage.
**I may not use vomiting as a breath weapon even if I am not Nauseated.

***I may not pick up vomit and proceed to use it as a projectile weapon.
****Ok, I can, but it won't do that much damage.
*****May not go on a vomit-throwing rampage thought the world.
******May no longer play adventurer mode of Dwarf Fortress ever again.

[Metahuman1]

Originally Posted by Kelb_Panthera

*If I make a character that is essentially a sapient blender, I must remember to only use the puree setting on BBEG's.

*I may not play a Warforged Totemist 6/Warblade 14, max ranks in martial Lore to make sure you can get the manuvers to qualify for Raging Mongoose + Time Stands Still.

*If I do so, I may not have leadership to give me a bard cohort with Optimized Inspire Courage and Dragonfire Inspiration granting Force or Sonic damage.

*Or an amulet of Mighty Fists enchanted with the speed property.

*As the DM, if I break above rule, I may not bulk when the above character has 96 attacks in a single attack routine, boosted with 10d6 + 10 to damage above his own personal modifiers form his cohort.

*As the player, I may not wait till the very last battle with the BBEG to do this after the rest of the party has taken out his Miss chance and softened up his AC, Just to see the look on the DM's face when he realizes that it's a RAW legit trick and build.

[Razanir]

* My ninja with Vow of Poverty may not be worth more than the average party of four level ones

[toapat]

*Plan A does not involve Chainlightning
**Plan B does not involve DBF
***Plan C does not involve your custom researched DBF
****But it may include Expedious Retreat

[Forrestfire]

*Just because the dragon I woke up is Good-aligned doesn't mean he won't eat me if I act up. He was napping, and people are grouchy in the morning.
**If he asks me for my life story, don't refuse. He'll ask my familiar using speak with animals instead, and then I won't get to embellish it.

[NikitaDarkstar]

Originally Posted by Forrestfire

*Just because the dragon I woke up is Good-aligned doesn't mean he won't eat me if I act up. He was napping, and people are grouchy in the morning.

** The same goes for the half-dragon fighter.
*** Especially if she uses her greatsword in the same way as most children uses a teddy bear.
**** If you make fun of her for this don't be surprised if she teaches you a few key differences between both teddy-bears and greatswords along with normal people and half-dragons.
***** If it has any amount of scales don't wake it up no matter what color the scales are.
******Dragons are rarely, if ever, "early birds".

[Kelb_Panthera]

* I will not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for I am crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

(I couldn't help it after reading the last couple of posts.)

[tuggyne]

Originally Posted by NikitaDarkstar

***** If it has any amount of scales don't wake it up no matter what color the scales are.

******* Tentacles are a similar warning sign, granted by the DM's mercy and benevolence.

[LordDeathkeeper]

Originally Posted by Forrestfire

**If he asks me for my life story, don't refuse. He'll ask my familiar using speak with animals instead, and then I won't get to embellish it.

*My familiar may not embellish my life story even more than I normally would.
**I may not ask my GM if my familiar can have the Taunt feat
***If he says yes, I should not attempt to use it on the BBEG
****If I do, I should not get upset when he casts Telekinesis to throw my familiar half a mile away.

[Malak'ai]

Originally Posted by Kelb_Panthera

* I will not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for I am crunchy and taste good with ketchup.

(I couldn't help it after reading the last couple of posts.)

**Mustard is also acceptable.
***Fried onions are compulsory.

[Socratov]

*when playing a bard with perform(horn) I am allowed to change the name of Inspire courage to Inspire Awesome when using wagner to perform on the horn. This is immune to rule zero.
**coupled with DFI this get's ramped up to Inspire Legend-wait for it-DARY!

[Incom]

Originally Posted by Socratov

*when playing a bard with perform(horn) I am allowed to change the name of Inspire courage to Inspire Awesome when using wagner to perform on the horn. This is immune to rule zero.
**coupled with DFI this get's ramped up to Inspire Legend-wait for it-DARY!

***playing a bard is a perfectly good reason to bring your RL horn to the session

()@' represent

[Razanir]

Originally Posted by Malak'ai

**Mustard is also acceptable.
***Fried onions are compulsory.

**** However, baking you into a nice quiche is going a bit overboard