Dominic Deegan, Mk. XLVII: A Flat World From Recycled Scrap

[Johnny Blade]

In this thread, we make fun of Dominic Deegan. Because it is a very bad webcomic.

It is currently in its final days, since the person responsible for it, a man the internet knows as Mookie, has had enough and wants to do another webcomic now. Slated to end somewhere between now and May (I think) - this is the latest estimation given by Mookie a few months ago, and I personally don't think he could narrow it down further at this point, because planning ahead is anathema to him.


This thread is named after a far superior work of fiction, a collaborative effort between thread regular Trazoi and Translation Party called Dear Dominique: Oracle rental.


The rest of this post is mostly copy-pasted from the last OP.

Snark Chronology (Snarkhronology)

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Thread I - Oct 31 2006 to Aug 9 2007 - 77 pages, the first half of which actually contained praise yet. Then Snowsong came about...
Thread II - Aug 8 2007 to Jun 10 2008 - the epic one, 301 pages, OVER NINE THOUSAAAND posts. Here the foundations of Domiology - our snarky fanon - were created.
Thread III - 10 Jun 2008 to Aug 12 2008 - 63 pages of snarky goodness, first one to contain the archives in the first post.
Thread IV - Aug 12 2008 to Sept 20 2008 - 50 pages, the one that carried us through the first half of the horrid Vacation Arc and brought the first actual fans into our threads (of course, their resolve starts to falter by now )
Thread V - Sept 20 2008 to Oct 18 2008 - 50 pages, the Vacation Arc continues to our unimaginable horror.
Thread VI - Oct 18 2008 to Nov 11 2008 - 50 pages, the final part of the vacation. So much to be learnt about walls and limbs; knowledge that Mookie, unfortunately, shall never possess.
Thread VII - 10 Nov 2008 to Dec 1 2008 - 50 pages, finally the Plot Creature caught up - but what has Mookie done to Celesto and TIM?
Thread VIII - Dec 1 2008 to Dec 23 2008 - 51 pages, wherein Dex rises from the dead and we are introduced to Sn'gl'euth'u, the cutest extradimensional Lovecraftian being since Hello Cthulhu.
Thread IX - Dec 23 2008 to Feb 20 2009 - 50 pages, which taught us that orcs not only have despicable traditions, they are also completely insane.
Thread X - Feb 20 2009 to Apr 5 2009 - 50 pages, which taught us that orcs are not only completely insane, they are actually crazy enough to make Cthulhu roll Sanity checks!
Thread XI - Apr 5 2009 to May 1 2009 - 51 pages, in which the orcs are at their height of insanity (going one step beyond), Luna is the designated Messiah of Everything and that tusks make you speshul.
Thread XII - May 1 2009 to Jun 6 2009 - 50 pages, where the orcs, after reaching the height of insanity previously, find ways to fly to entirely new planes of mind-crushing madness, sufficient to warp their plain to the size of a backyard and time to freeze, as nothing interesting happens at all.
Thread XIII - Jun 6 2009 to July 9 2009 - 50 pages, where the orcs continue to plumb the bottomless depths of inanity. Oh, and insanity too. Meanwhile, Luna discovers a new Sue power: inflicting the worst monologues ever on hapless readers. Also, Jacob is evil.
Thread XIV - July 9 2009 to Aug 6 2009 - 50 pages, where we are still occupied with Orcs. Orcs. Orcs, everywhere! Oh gods, is this arc not going to end ever?! I repent, Mookie! I repent! Just make it stop! Make it stooooop!
Thread XV - Aug 6 2009 to Sept 7 2009 - 50 pages, with Orcs, who do Orc things and KILL THEM, KILL ALL THE ORCS, EXTERMINATE THEM, SO THIS HORROR CAN END!
Thread XVI - Sept 7 2009 to Sept 26 2009 - 50 pages. Do I have to tell you what it was about at this point anymore? You have three guesses. And the first two don't count.
Thread XVII - Sept 26 2009 to Oct 20 2009 - 51 pages. The Orcs are still insane, and in this thread, they managed to temporarily infect us. Among the results are a debate about relativism and many pictures of various cute, funny, and weird animals. There also was a decapitation. It was metal.
Thread XVIII - Oct 20 2009 to Nov 19 2009 - 50 pages, in which the March Through Maltak continues against logic, reason, good taste and sanity. Also including attempts at a non-lethal battle and awesome plot twists(Dominic fixes everything!)
Thread XIX - Nov 19 2009 to Dec 15 2009 - 50 pages. The Battle At the Bikta Sanctuary is trudging along, with consistency and logic being casualties.
Thread XX - Dec 15 2009 to Jan 14 2010 - 50 pages, where many lessons are learned: Never trust a bard, rain solves everything, and a stunning revelation by a necromancer so important it's the next thread title.
Thread XXI - Jan 14 2010 to Feb 25 2010 - 51 pages. Now that events have been set into motion that may affect the destiny of the entire world, we get to see Nimmel and his crazy college shenanigans!
Thread XXII - Feb 25 2010 to Mar 31 2010 - 51 pages, where Nimmel fully ascends into the First Caste, donning the Mantle of Sue that he might make us all immune to boobs.
Thread XXIII - March 31 2010 to May 9 2010 - 50 pages. After Talking to one tentacled creature about another, Mamma Deegan returns home, and Greg starts a band.
Thread XXIV - May 9, 2010 to June 9, 2010 - 50 pages. Greg's band is so meh it's un-****ing believable.
Thread XXV - June 9, 2010 to July 22, 2010 - 51 pages. The strange ecology of the Wild Edge Territory, and the stranger behavior of the Callanians living there. If there's a keyword, it's "random". Also, inappropriate names for creatures.
Thread XXVI - July 22, 2010 to Sept. 6 2010 - 50 pages. Stunt's stunts in the Wild Edge show a stunting of character and such stunted emotional capacity that he probably suffers from stunt. Also, Celesto meditates naked.
Thread XXVII - Sept. 6, 2010 to Oct. 6, 2010 - 50 pages. The comic goes to hell. Again. Siegfried returns and shouts a lot.
Thread XXVIII - Oct. 6, 2010 to Oct. 27, 2010 - 50 pages. Curly has exploded at the end of the War in Hell just like a soul. Now, on to a trial.
Thread XXVIIIS - Nov. 6, 2010 to Nov. 7, 2010 - 1 page. Wherein a true fan who has made it as far as Storm of Souls, makes a thread.
Thread XXIX - Oct. 27 2010 to Dec. 2, 2010 - 50 pages. The "trial" is just a veiled excuse to have Bulgak grow wings on his head and look into goalposts that show him important events in his past.
Thread XXX - Dec. 2, 2010 to January 1, 2011 - 51 pages. Bulgak goes boom. Filler. Then nothing happens except Curly's marathon readthrough of Maltak.
Thread XXXI - Jan. 1, 2011 to January 21, 2011 - 50 pages. Dominic and Luna finally show up, and then we get an arc about plastic surgery.
Thread XXXII - Jan. 22, 2011 to Feb. 18, 2011 - 50 Pages. Luna is great. So great. Also: Snuggly joins the Loony Toons.
Thread XXXIII - Feb. 19, 2011 to Mar. 24, 2011 - 50 pages. Snuggly is allergic to shellfish. Facebath returns to sing songs about how Luna is so great.
Thread XXXIV - Mar. 24, 2011 to April 19, 2011 - 50 pages. Snuggly kills an all-powerful archmage and no one is too concerned about it. Also, we met King DJ.
Thread XXXV - April 19, 2011 to May 23, 2011 - 50 pages. Dominic must find Celesto for no reason in particular. The Battlecasters are spying on all Second Sight, everywhere.
Thread XXXVI - May 24, 2011 to June 24, 2011 - 50 pages. Dominic visits his old friend Szark. Together, they uncover the dark secret of two teenagers who, brace yourself, are trapped in a vicious cycle of bullying. Holy moly! The world-destroying abomination is assumed to still be relevant, but not even Dominic knows why.
Thread XXXVII - June 24, 2011 to August 7, 2011 - 50 pages. Dominic strips naked and drives a small child insane while Szark prevents anyone from helping the kid.
Thread XXXVIII - August 7, 2011 to September 14, 2011 - 51 pages. Dominic pulls out some old tricks and some new ones, we're all totally confused, and then we're smacked with a one-two punch of Smug and Great.
Thread XXXIX - September 15, 2011 to October 19, 2011 - 50 pages. Luna and Greg go to an art gallery, some stuff with battlecasters happens, somehow we manage to draw this out for fifty pages.
Thread XL - October 19, 2011 to November 22, 2011 - 50 pages. The budding love between Gregory and some battlecaster whose name nobody cares about and the union between a toast and a lizard showed us that love conquers all. A guitar will do just as well, though.
Thread XLI- 22nd November, 2011 to December 22nd, 2011 - 50 pages. Some guy grows a moustache in the finest example of character development so far. Luna blubbers away because she loves Dominic -who deigns to tolerate her display- so much, showing how far the author thinks she's come as a character. Mookie and Luna get married, the latter against her will and a tiny explosion signals the end times.
Thread XLII - 22nd December 2011 to 6th February 2012 - 50 pages. The Infernomancer is back! The King's nefarious plan is going to fruition! This cannot stand, so the plot is thwarted by instead deciding to follow Jayden's quest of redemption for the sin of having cheated on her violent, emotion-crazed beastman of a boyfriend. Because it's totally what's important.
Thread XLIII - 6th February 2012 to 20th March 2012 - 50 pages. Still on the adventures of Stunt in the desert. Uh, what? Jayden who? Who said anything about Jayden?
Thread XLIV 20th March 2012 to 18th May 2012. You'd think archmages, who are recognized as the most powerful mortal movers and shakers of the known universe, would be such pathetic combatants?
Thread XLV: 18th May 2012 to 24 July 2012. 'Splosions, 'splosions everywhere, and Nimmel's in the air. 'Splosions, 'splosions everywhere, and only dead Bumper (and not of explosion either!).
Thread XLVI: July 24th 2012 to October 18th 2012. Most notable here is how long it took us to fill 50 pages this time. That is mainly because during these months Mookie mainly filled his pages with white noise in white voids. Then there was a flashback revealing the king to be behind everything bad and trying to help his eyeballs eat most of the world so Callan could keep the magic star (because he is racist), Mookie jumped on the zombie bandwagon, Dominic surrendered himself to stop it, Celesto was a bird (again) and trust me, this wouldn't make more sense if it was explained in detail.

And our sister threads:
Strip Slays, the best thread ever
Strip Slays 2: the best thread strikes back
Strip Slays 3 - Someone Is Going To Slay For This Outrage.
Strip Slays 4: A Slay On Words.
If the madness of this thread does not suffice to bring your SAN rating down, those will. For sure.
[DD Snark]Maltak: The Unsuckening - Art by Domochevsky, Writing by Oracle_Hunter, edited by us. A parody of the longest arc done in the style of Hiimdaisy's comic strips, now with snazzy new (non-sucky) link!
Dominic Deegan - The Second Coming - the now dead Dominic Deegan rewrite, where everyone could contribute! Assuming it was still alive.

For more information, check out the Encyclopedia Dominica, our all-encompassing archive of knowledge! It's a wiki!

If you're wondering why we snark, check out Why We Snark on the wiki!

For further reading, there's The Descent of Man (into Madness and Mookie) by Johnny Blade.

And there is also the Dominic Deegan game: Punchy's Brilliant Adventure: Ley Line Scramble, courtesy of TamerBill!

MORE FUN STUFF:

Snarky Flowcharts (Flowsnarks)

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Turcano's Chart of Arc Hope
Helanna's Chart of Thread Trends

guttering_flame's Cycle of Life and Death (Spoiler: It All Leads to Maltak)

Snark Art (Snart)

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Dominic Deegan's art is garbage. However, some people may at times believe, possible after being exposed to it for way too long a time, that it's not that bad.
Well, here's something to guide the lost souls back to the light.

Domo's Beef:

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Domo's Reenvisioning (of the Melna vs Taran fight scene and Luna's entrance at the Bikta camp):

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Silverblood

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Pay close attention, you may notice a little surprise.

Garland

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BEHOLD! MUSTACHE!


SNARKSERVICE

Maltak: The Unsuckening

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8 out of Unknown parts done so far.

Domo's commentary on werewolf society:

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TamerBill's animations:

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Big Stuff
Dominic Deegan: The Animated Series
Battle For Barthis 2
Magical Nerd Lyrical Nimmeloha

Little Stuff
Power-Walking With Nimmel Fenix
Dominic Dansen: Oracle for Hire
Young Men's Chibi Association
Hell Is Other Panels

Joro's good old days:

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In an alternate universe, Dominic Deegan: Surly Jerk With a Fish on His Head is a well regarded webcomic.

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Crud, I think I drew his nose off center.

Jacob used to be somewhat cool. What happened? Curse you, Maltak.

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Glass Mouse:

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Averagejoe's One Panel (Sn)Arcs

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The adventures of Stunt Bro and Hella Jayden.

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Curly's Dominic Deegan Analyses

[Mr. McGician]

Miranda will probably try to talk him out of dying/making her kill him, and of course she'll persuade him, because she's a morally flawless Deegan and he's just a stupid incredibly powerful being from an incomprehensible dimension who isn't a Deegan.

[Traab]

Nah, I say she either blows him up, or frees him from mind control so he can suicide attacking dj in some fashion. After all, there is no moral issue involved with killing if its a deegan doing it. They are automatically right anyways, so clearly, helping him die is the morally correct choice, if she makes it.

[Khosan]

Sneaky
Future

I'm not even gonna try.

[Rhapsh]

....So the archmages always intended for Miranda to be the first human archmage. Except it was implied by the original flashback that the King first visited them years ago, and that they had never met Miranda before that.

You know, I'd be more pissed off about this, but honestly at this point, of course the Deegan is the special snowflake destined holy one. Why would you ever expect any other result?

[Trazoi]

Denying a Deegan what was rightfully theirs. The Ultimate Sin.

Also blah blah Miranda dialog totally OC blah blah as usual.

I Love Dominique:

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[Friv]

Originally Posted by Rhapsh

....So the archmages always intended for Miranda to be the first human archmage. Except it was implied by the original flashback that the King first visited them years ago, and that they had never met Miranda before that.

Plus, she was the king's choice to replace himself, because something something malleable?

I'm going to choose to believe that Mast is lying to pump Miranda up and turn her into his agent of revenge.

[random11]

Originally Posted by Friv

Plus, she was the king's choice to replace himself, because something something malleable?

I'm going to choose to believe that Mast is lying to pump Miranda up and turn her into his agent of revenge.

the only other explanation I can think of, is that the arch-magi used mind magic to influence David's decision, at the same time that he mind controlled them.

That, and the regular lack of consistency.

[Acanous]

Miranda was origionally 0.5 Archmage.
It all makes sense now.

[random11]

If this scene is in Masutel's mind-scape and Miranda is killing him there instead of in the real world, doesn't that mean she is killing the only part that kept him sane, leaving only the mind controlled version of him?

[Ninjadeadbeard]

Originally Posted by Veridis Quo

I know this might sound bitter, but this comic is the equivalent of someone holding a balloon next to your head and releasing the air from it while pinching the ends of the neck. There's nothing but hot air escaping and this thin, high-pitched farting noise sounding off in your ear.

From the last thread right at the end. This perfectly encapsulates what DD is now. I don't want to sig this, I want to immortalize it on my tombstone. Cuz this comic is killing me.

Originally Posted by Trazoi

I Love Dominique:

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Anyone else think Mas seems super-impatient with Miranda in panel 3? He's like, "Oh for Dominus' sake just kill me already!"

[Zaq]

"Because my body is so big"? Really? Really? That's the explanation we're going with?

I lack the energy to facepalm.

[guttering flame]

So enchantments/mind control rot your body?? This explains a lot about Szark Sturz.

[Barefoot Monkey]

Henceforth, Miranda Deegan shall be addressed as "50 Cent"!

Originally Posted by guttering flame

So enchantments/mind control rot your body?? This explains a lot about Szark Sturz.

Only David's, because of the corrupting effect of Snuggly on his magic. It's why the king was complaining that the enchantments had "gone wrong", leaving his victims "weak and rotting" (or something along those lines).

[Johnny Blade]

Meanwhile, the king throws a tantrum on the balcony.

Originally Posted by Rhapsh

....So the archmages always intended for Miranda to be the first human archmage. Except it was implied by the original flashback that the King first visited them years ago, and that they had never met Miranda before that.

You know, I'd be more pissed off about this, but honestly at this point, of course the Deegan is the special snowflake destined holy one. Why would you ever expect any other result?

So, about this.

Here the king first visits the archmages. In the next comic, they make up some story so they don't need to tell him they're waiting for some random girl.

Of course that makes no sense, because studying in the Sanctum and being an Archmage are not the same thing.


Now the really good part:

Decades passed (last panel). This is after several years passed after the king first visited the Sanctum.

When Miranda joined, she was a promising young woman, which I read to mean she was at most in her early thirties, most likely younger.

Basically meaning she was chosen as an archmage before she was even conceived.

At this point I'm thinking breeding program.

Originally Posted by random11

If this scene is in Masutel's mind-scape and Miranda is killing him there instead of in the real world, doesn't that mean she is killing the only part that kept him sane, leaving only the mind controlled version of him?

Also, if it kills him...the king just needs him to put on a show and has explicitly been shown to have the means to create magic-using zombies.

But no, go ahead and kill him, Miranda, I'm sure it's a great idea.

[Neoriceisgood]

I wonder why Miranda isn't called Sue.

[rocketpony]

Okay so, the thing about intending somebody else to be an archmage before they're even born isn't that shaky, given that magic exists that allows you to see the future. The premise of the entire comic, in fact, is that magic exists that allows you to see the future! So, I gotta stand up for Mookie on this seeming problem that could be solved if only there existed magic that allowed you to see the future.
On the other hand, given that magic exists that allows you to review job applicants and determine their ultimately fate, you'd think the archmagi council would be a lot more paranoiacally proactive. The second DJ steps into the sanctum and is like "Hook me up bros," they do a simple scry to see the results, and DJ leaves the sanctum turned into a storm of butterflies.

I'm not 100% on why it was important that Miranda be included in the circle before DJ, or indeed why Miranda and DJ couldn't both be in the circle at the same time. Can you only have one representative from each species? That could be a thing if this was a diplomatic organization, I guess, some sort of magical United Nations. What is the domain of the archmagi council? Do they receive state funding to pursue magical projects, were they picked by some higher power to help administer the universe, or are they just a bunch of guys who want an excuse to wear a funny hat? (just the one hat between them)

[Oracle_Hunter]

Originally Posted by Johnny Blade

Basically meaning she was chosen as an archmage before she was even conceived.

At this point I'm thinking breeding program.

She's the Kwisatz Haderach

* * *

Seriously though, I should have seen this coming but I totally did not. I mean, Dominic was already a Chosen One centuries before he was born so of course his mother could be no less.

Still, how can Mookie not see how ridiculous this turn of events is? The Archmagi turned away DJ Callan (who was powerful enough to best the entire Council single-handedly!) to save a spot for someone who wouldn't even be born for years to come? And yet they were completely unable to foresee any of DJ Callan's machinations? Really?

Oh yeah, and the cherry on this Fail Sundae is that the Archmagi wanted Miranda for her "wisdom." Since when has Miranda been portrayed as wise or even used that legendary insight to do anything? Hell, she couldn't even pick out her own successor without asking her son to psychically screen candidates and her candidate pool included these jokers. I mean, DJ isn't exactly a font of wisdom either but at least his repertoire is broader than "punch things to death" and "cast them beyond space and time"

[Nerd-o-rama]

The established ability to see the future makes the timeline make sense, but not really anything else about this.

Also, Miranda is not the Kwisatz Haderach. Miranda is Lady Jessica.

I mean, just look at Dominic.

[MReav]

Originally Posted by Oracle_Hunter

Still, how can Mookie not see how ridiculous this turn of events is? The Archmagi turned away DJ Callan (who was powerful enough to best the entire Council single-handedly!) to save a spot for someone who wouldn't even be born for years to come? And yet they were completely unable to foresee any of DJ Callan's machinations? Really?

I would probably not equate power with skill. If he were sufficiently powerful that would probably mean they couldn't bust through his charms all the blasted time. What he did was more the metaphysical equivalent of poisoning their drinks when they weren't looking.

Still, their attitude is kinda dismissive for a guy that pretty much screwed them all over and played them for fools.

[Zaq]

Originally Posted by Johnny Blade

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Meanwhile, the king throws a tantrum on the balcony.


So, about this.

Here the king first visits the archmages. In the next comic, they make up some story so they don't need to tell him they're waiting for some random girl.

Of course that makes no sense, because studying in the Sanctum and being an Archmage are not the same thing.


Now the really good part:

Decades passed (last panel). This is after several years passed after the king first visited the Sanctum.

When Miranda joined, she was a promising young woman, which I read to mean she was at most in her early thirties, most likely younger.

Basically meaning she was chosen as an archmage before she was even conceived.

At this point I'm thinking breeding program.


Also, if it kills him...the king just needs him to put on a show and has explicitly been shown to have the means to create magic-using zombies.

But no, go ahead and kill him, Miranda, I'm sure it's a great idea.

Time changes everything.

[Morty]

Originally Posted by Oracle_Hunter

Oh yeah, and the cherry on this Fail Sundae is that the Archmagi wanted Miranda for her "wisdom." Since when has Miranda been portrayed as wise or even used that legendary insight to do anything? Hell, she couldn't even pick out her own successor without asking her son to psychically screen candidates and her candidate pool included these jokers. I mean, DJ isn't exactly a font of wisdom either but at least his repertoire is broader than "punch things to death" and "cast them beyond space and time"

The same way Luna is regarded as brilliant despite exhibiting the approximate intelligence of an inebriated caterpillar.

[MReav]

You know, maybe the reason Enchantment is such an overlooked school of magic is because of magical prejudice. The Archmages dismiss it, so the ruling view is that everyone should dismiss it.

Go DJ Callan! Fight the power!

Also, Luna is intelligent the way Brainard from the remake of Flubber is intelligent. She's got a thorough understanding of magic theory, but in day-to-day life, you'd sometimes wonder if she could feed herself.

Maybe Miranda is wise the way Luna "made her tusks her own". You know, the way she tried to kill herself multiple times because of it?

[Mr. McGician]

Ugh. Mookie went with something even stupider than I predicted. The Deegans are such disgusting Mary Sues.

[Mewtarthio]

I have to admit, this is the first DD to actually make me laugh out loud in some time.

[AgentofOdd]

Originally Posted by Khosan

Sneaky
Future

I'm not even gonna try.

On the plus side, with all the archmages except Miranda dead, Dave has assured humanity (with the most powerful and knowledgeable magic user) will remain magically dominant for centuries perhaps even longer. Short of Dominic killing his mom, the king has already won.

[Sweetie Welf]

Pathetic. Just pathetic

also:

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#1


#2

[Traab]

I just... I dont get it. How can anyone be so oblivious about their work? Has this entire comic been nothing more than an experiment to see how many ways he can fail as a writer and an artist at the same time? You know what would save this entire comic series for me? If at the end, mookie manages to post a "haha, gotcha!" type message followed by proof that he has planned this entire comic to play out this terribadly in an effort to complete a 12 year trollathon. Best method? "Just kidding guys, here is the real comic series." And bang, he posts all 12 years of comic that were drawn and written with skill and talent, telling a truly epic tale.

[random11]

Originally Posted by Johnny Blade

Also, if it kills him...the king just needs him to put on a show and has explicitly been shown to have the means to create magic-using zombies.

But no, go ahead and kill him, Miranda, I'm sure it's a great idea.

Or he can just take credit for his death.
The arch-magi is already framed for murder, and who will know it wasn't him when Miranda killed him out of sight while DJ was so close to him in his flying fortress?

Also, can someone remind me what was the point of this fake attack?
He can just take the power now, why all this act?

[Acanous]

Archmage dies over the city. DJ: "Look folks! A monster came to attack the city! But I killed it Pre-emptively. You never have to fear the sort of attack the Lunarians had to deal with while I am your king!"