D&D Snippets

[Dr Bwaa]

Is this bit present tense? What I mean is, this is where the characters are currently at, and the rest of the story is Claaus remembering what happened and why they had to run? Because if so, I would do something to make it more obvious, probably just put it in italics so it's clear that this is happening now and isn't him still remembering. It's a bit of a jarring change in style and upsets the flow a bit as it is, so doing that would help the reader understand what's going on.

Thanks! I was worrying about that, but was having a hard time telling if it was too much of a jolt. *-delimited now

Are the rest of the tense things okay? It's really awkward to write everything in past-perfect, which is kind of where most of the action belongs*, so I just made use of it where it was the least obtrusive... Hopefully no one's too mad at me.


*Since Claaus is basically telling the story "I killed those men" and everything else is in the "things that had happened to set that up" category.