Quote Originally Posted by Sipex View Post
I have some sage advice for all you out there who have lost hope or believe themselves to be the rejects of male society, undatable by any woman. I say this as a guy who has now dated the same woman for nearly 8 years and has these exact discussions with her about how naive and blind we used to be in our youth.

I've formatted it in a numbered list because I like numbered lists.

1) Guys are horrible at reading if girls have any attraction to them. Ditto goes for girls reading guys. I'm dead serious, you think nobody has ever found you attractive? I highly (HIGHLY) doubt that.

Maybe nobody has said 'hey, you're cute' to your face but in today's culture that tends to be the norm unless the person is overly charismatic or actually dating you.
Yeah, well, that doesn't exactly help me feel any better. If I don't know anyone finds me attractive, I don't have any reason to think someone does.

2) Nerdiness isn't always obvious in the way you recognise it. In fact, often times it's not obvious at all. You think a nerdy girl would be someone who likes D&D, video games, maybe zombies. We nerds have many likes so pick and choose the categories which match up to your likes.

Well, there are female nerds out there looking for guys who are into music and the theatre (no joke, these two groups contain a metric ton of female nerds. If only I had known in highschool, really). How many of you like music and/or theatre? I'm willing to bet it's not at the bottom of the list. Guess what, the women here, they like video games and zombies and stuff too, they're just more adamant about something slightly different.

Also, stop looking for girls with glasses.
I know plenty of nerdy girls. They're all either dating someone else or completely uninterested in me as anything but a friend (and not even really that, unless it's a thing to never ever contact guys on any level which is pretty much my interactions with everyone around me).

Also, what do you do if music and theater aren't really your thing?
3) AKA_Bait said "Convert one".

Seriously, go out and do it. You'd be surprised. My girl was a music geek who was kind of into video games (but they weren't a major thing for her at the time) when we met.

Now we play halo and several other games together.

On the other hand, I'm more into music.

Couples tend to influence each other's interests like that.

4) Don't rely on the few representatives at your coveted interest gathering.

You a huge P&P gamer but the local club has 2 girls and 56 guys, what's up with that?

Truth be told, many girls don't go to these things because they don't want to be hit on by the 56 guys who are all thinking "OMFG A GIRL WHO LIKES D&D". I'm told this is a common frustration. Many women/girls have these interests and want to attend things like this but don't because of harrassment they're afraid they'll get. Even if none of the guys are actually going to hit on them they're under the impression that it's inevitable.

That's why most of the girls in the club aren't single, because they don't have to worry about it anymore so they feel free to come.

Also, often, a woman won't go to this sort of thing because they don't have someone to introduce them to it. It's like you going to a club you're mildly interested in but don't know anyone at. You're hesistant.

I have to cut this short now, but I'll be able to rebuttal against anyone crying foul or clarify when I get back!

edit: No rebuttals which is odd, I thought this was poorly worded in areas which could easily be taken badly due to me rushing. Maybe I was wrong in that assumption then!
I'm left wondering what the actual advice here was. There's a girl out there just waiting? Don't despair just cause you're 26, about to leave college (and thus any even half-way decent means of meeting people besides bars which I don't go to because I hate them), and have never been in a relationship before and don't even know how to form relationships in the first place because you're a complete and utter social failure? Seriously, right now I'm at a point where I'm pretty sure there's no one around me who even thinks twice about me in any way, let alone attraction, and I can probably forget about romantic feelings from anyone. The fact that I never see anyone outside of group settings doesn't help my loneliness, either.