League of Legends XXV: Who is your Summoner, and what does he do?

[tribble]

Y'all who are wondering how we won that game, take a look at the other team's summoner spells.

What makes it sweetest of all is that we weren't even premade. It was a random solo Que game, Graves, Kog, and Ash all instapicked, so I grabbed twitch and said "5 carry gogogo" and this happened.

Also related to that game: Debilitating poison is really, really OP. It slows by a huge amount even if you haven't hit anyone, and if they have even one or two stacks of poison on them it's practically a snare.

EDIT: Irelia'd.