Relationship Woes and Advice 21: Time To Go Bar-Hopping

[Glass Mouse]

No, no worries. It's just too early in the morning to go into my sob story.
"Nuclear Option"? What does that mean in this context?
Here's my thought process so far (excluding the half-hour of complete shock):
Well, it's rude to just ignore somebody. Looking at things objectively, though, she's the last person who deserves my civility. Also, today is her birthday. So I'm not sure whether I should be nice to her, or whether replying to an email with such basic social interactions as, "Hey, it's been a while. How have you been?" would upset her.
So when in doubt, ignore the problem and hope it goes away, all the while actually not ignoring it and instead actually kind of freaking out about it. That's what I've been doing so far.

If it's not too late, just delete the mail. Or read it, then delete it (just in case it's an olive branch or another kind of closure).

I know how easy it is to fall in that kind of "ignoring", but in my experience it's usually a sign that you need to do something for yourself and throw out all "should"s.

And it being someone's birthday should never be a reason to do something you don't want to. If she's reckless enough to send an email to someone she had a messy relationship with on her birthday, she should be able to handle if it doesn't pan out well. You can be friendly, polite, detached, not answer, or even be rude, depending on her mail and your relationship, and her birthday shouldn't factor in.
I understand not wanting to be cruel or rude when there's happiness to destroy, but if someone kicks a hornet's nest, they're just asking for it.

Of course, I'm a total cynic about birthdays, so my perspective may be a little off.

If I remember rightly, it means cutting off literally all contact with her forever. For official purposes, she no longer exists.

Pretty much. I've been reading way too much Doctor Nerdlove, it seems

So, there's this girl (of course, why else would I be posting here?)

Spoiler

Show

We've been friends for a couple months now, and I reeeeally like her, and she knows this. She does have a boyfriend, but she complains about him a lot and has talked to me about breaking up with him multiple times. She's also said that she would date me if she wasn't with him.

For a while now, she's been hinting that she wants to do the no-no with me. Finally, about two weeks ago I asked if she actually wanted to. She said yes.

But the four or so opportunities we've had (Being in my last year of high school, I still live at home. Because of that, parents need to be gone.) she has had some excuse.

So I guess I'm asking if she's serious or just leading me on. For both the sex thing and just for dating.

No matter what, if she's that willing to fool around with you behind her boyfriend's back, she is not girlfriend material. Seriously. Planning sex with someone who is not your boyfriend is just crossing all kinds of lines.


Edit:
@Vella: If I can be of any use, feel free to write