The first guy you mention (keeping the male busy) should also be focusing on DPSing the Female lover. I (Mesmer condition staff build) take the male over by the fire brazzers (The word is escaping me, sorry, but you know what I'm talking about :) ) and kite him using line of sight with the fire things. using my illusions to keep him off me, I can keep DPSing on the women using the '1' and '5' staff skills, keeping boons up on my allies. This opens up The rock thrower to focus on throwing rocks at the woman so she stays up on the stairs on the other side of the room, and can help DPS as well. Worked well for us, but it was a guild (of casual players) with mumble.
Also, before any of the "there are no agro mechanics". This is not true.
True statements would be "There is no taunt" "There is no lock down tank" "Agro is a bit random". But it is fairly predictable. Play with it, learn about it, makes stuff alot easier.