Mynxae's Maliciously Magnificent Random Banter #183

[Teddy]

LOGICNESS

It's the tool of my trade and my weapon of choice, my panacea for problems and my virgin's tears for solutions.

Alas no... I live some 100 km from the border, and experience the greatest temperature extreme of major cities in the world. There have been blizzards here that buried bungalows to the eaves. The three rivers freeze solid enough to drive snowploughs on.

Ahh, this reminds me of the winters when I was little, and they used to plough up a road across the lake on the way to mum's job. The improvised ice-road presented a great shortcut to mum, and even though I only ever was with her once or twice when she took that road, it's an image strongly imprinted on my mind.

It's a dry cold, which makes it more bearable -- but my hands and lips turn to scales, and I rail in the endless gobbling darkness like a withered queen, smashing mirrors and draining peasants for some recourse.

I still haven't found a good remedy for scaly lips (it's a problem for me all around the year, but even worse in the winter), but I know a cure for the darkness: Buy yourself one of those electric light strands you hang in the Christmas tree (it should be the small kind, not the large kind that pretends to be real candles, and make sure that it's certified for outdoor use), wrap it around a bush or other object of choice in your garden (preferably somewhere that's highly visible from inside your house) and link it up to a timer that lights it in the morning and evening. I don't care that it isn't christmas, the cosiness factor is simply too high to not be worth it.