Hello, hello, welcome, one and all, to the forty-ninth iteration of our thread, the humble LGBTAI in the playground thread!
The AI is for All-Inclusive, because we have only so much space but everyone, regardless of orientation, direction, letter, acronym or chosen astrological symbol is welcome here!
We do, unfortunately, have a few rules. We are not an anarchical state! Or, we weren't until they voted we were? But shush.
1. We are primarily a support thread.
This means that the primary focus should be in helping people here feel better; about themselves, about their lives, about their problems. We are also an education thread, but when helping someone learn involves not supporting, we will default to support - Mostly. We are only mostly human, after all.
All of the other rules are basically precisions of rule #1.
2. If you want answers to triggering topics, spoiler-box or ask them privately.
Triggering topics are those which are likely to make other people feel bad, in any way whatsoever: for instance, rape, violence, bullying and many others may be triggering to some people. If someone, even just that one individual person, has a problem with a topic because it stirs demons best left in their pit, Do. Not. Bring. It. Up. Publically. Use a spoilerbox, and think carefully about whether this is the place to broach the topic at all (see rule #1: "We are primarily a support thread.")
If you have questions or need help on something that involves triggering topics, please use spoiler tags and label your spoilers for trigger warnings. When in doubt, put trigger warnings.
3. Avoid discussing politics or religion.
It doesn't matter how much these two topics intersect with our forum topic, they are verboten. Sometimes, hints are... Looked over, such as "man, in my countery being gay sucks", but detail is right out, and even that could be considered willful disregard. Be Careful. As the moderators themselves often say, if you aren't sure, Don't.
4. Do not discuss moral justification.
No one here is going to discuss whether or not it's Right" or "Okay" to be LGBTAEIOUsometimesY or anything else. It's not topical, it's not relevant. We are, and we are here to cope with that and with the stresses it causes.
And no, my joking acronym doesn't constitute considering this rule less important.
5. Do not opst sexually explicit content.
It's against forum rules, it's against decorum, and it will get us shut down pretty fast. What adults do behind closed doors is cool, and allusion is fine. Anything that could involve a diagram, though? No.
6. Avoid unfriendly debates.
Several topics of conversation have created huge arguments that made several people uncomfortable and defied our goal of being a support thread. This is especially true debates of definition. These do not always end well, and are best avoided.
This thread has a past of traumatic experiences which we would rather not repeat, and some topics which have created (in)famous rows include:
- the precise distinction between bi- and pansexual;
- what is or isn't a polyamorous relationship;
- whether transgender is more correct than transgendered.
(Other topics may be added to the list.)
Unless you need support or help about this, please refrain from bringing up these topics.
Also, if a conversation that is not about support runs long, spoiler it if possible, even if it is polite.
Glossary of Common Terms
And, for reference, here is a list of commonly used words and definitions by our community. Please understand that this list is currently undergoing construction right now. Any contributions to the list are appreciated.
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LGBT: Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Trans*
LGBTAI: LGBT+Asexual/Allies+Intersex+All Inclusive
Lagerbeta: A fine brewski to be drunk by all - the name comes from the above abbreviation.
QUILTBAG:
Q - Queer and Questioning
U - Unidentified
I - Intersex
L - Lesbian
T - Transgender, Transexual
B - Bisexual
A - Asexual
G - Gay, Genderqueer
Where a word below is in italics, that means it has it's own entry on the list.
A note on labels: many of these labels are seemingly interchangeable, and for some people they are. However, please do not presume to correct or judge another person's use of a label. Bisexual and Pansexual are especially tricky in this regard, as are transgender and transsexual to a lesser degree.
Often the difference in why one person feels one label is appropriate and not another is deeply personal. If you wish to know more it is probably a topic to seek private advice on, from one of the people listed in the next section.
AFAB/AMAB: Assigned Female/Male at Birth
Agendered: Someone who lacks a gender.
Androgyne: Gender Identity with male and female aspects.
Androsexual: A person who is attracted to men.
Asexual: A person who does not feel any/some sexual attraction.
Binary, The: See: Gender Binary.
Bisexual: 1. attracted to two genders; 2. attracted to one's own gender and another gender; 3. attracted to various genders; 4. attracted to people regardless of gender; 5. ask the person who says they're bi what exactly they mean by that. See also Pansexual
Cis: See: Cisgender
Cisgender (CG): Somebody whose gender and sex align.
Demisexual: A person who is sexually attracted to someone(s) only after they have formed an intense emotional relationship with.
Dysphoria: The disassociation Trans* people feel with their own body.
Male-to-Female (MtF): Someone who was assigned male at birth, but is female. (AKA: trans woman)
Female: See: Woman
Female-to-Male (FtM): Someone who was assigned female at birth, but is male. (AKA: trans man)
FAAB: Female Assigned at Birth.
Feminine: Something generally associated by society with women.
FFS: Facial Feminization Surgery: Surgery to reduce chin/nose/cheekbones. Associated primarily with MAAB Trans people
FtM: See: Female to Male
Gay: A man who is attracted to men.
Gender Binary: The commonly held notion that there are only men and women on two extremes, with nothing in between.
Gender Expression (GE): How one expresses their Gender Identity to society.
Gender Identity (GI): How one feels inside society's idea of "man, woman, or other".
Genderfluid: Someone who fluctuates between different genders.
Genderqueer (GQ): Someone who is not of a binary gender; someone who is not male or female.
Gynosexual: A person who is attracted to women.
Heterosexual: A person who is attracted to members of the opposite gender.
Homosexual: A person who is attracted to members of their gender.
HRT: Hormone replacement therapy. MtF's tend to progestrogens, oestrogens and androgen blockers, while FtM's take testosterone almost exculsively.
Lesbian: A woman who is attracted to women.
MAAB: Male Assigned at Birth.
Male-to-Female (MtF): Someone who was assigned male at birth, but is female. (AKA: trans woman)
Man/men: A cis man or trans man. Male.
Masculine: Something generally associated by society with men.
Pansexual: A person who is attracted to people regardless of gender. See also Bisexual
Polyamorous: A person who is interested in a relationship with more than one person.
Presenting: Trans* shorthand for appearing as their preferred gender, regardless of any HRT, SRS or other changes.
Trans*: Transsexual and Transgender primarily, with the asterisk denoting that the trans- prefix could be followed by any number of appropriate words. It also includes other labels, and is a catch-all term for people who identify as something other than their biological sex at birth.
Transgender: Used in reference to a person whose sex(body) and gender(mind) are at odds or do not match. A transgender person can also identify as genderqueer, transsexual, or may use transgender as their only identity.
Transitioning: The process a Trans* person undergoes to move to their preferred gender. Often includes HRT, SRS, FFS.
Transsexual: In common terms the same as transgender above. In medical terms refers specifically to people who wish to transition from male to female or female to male, not accommodating any other options.
SRS: Sex Reassignment Surgery: Surgery to replace/transform a vagina into a penis, or vice versa. Mastectomies or plastic surgery may be used on breasts.
Sexual Orientation (SO): How one identifies who they are attracted to.
Significant Other(s) (SO): Person(s) you are in a relationship with.
Third-gendered: Someone who fits in a local society's third gender, usually male performing female tasks, occasionally vice versa. Also a person who feels they do not identify with any other gender identity.
Woman: A cis woman or trans woman. Female.
Allies: Hetereosexual-Cisgender people who support equality for sexual, gender, and romantic minorities.
Private Consultation.
We have a list of people whoa re willing and able to discuss topics that may not be thread-appropriate but are still topical. They can be reached by Personal Message (PM), thought they may not respond immediately, or may be on sabbatical.
Spoiler: Topical Consultants
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Name: Especially familiar with the topic(s) of
KenderWizard: General/basics, gender and feminism, bisexuality
Musashi: General/basics, asexuality/demisexuality, depression
noparlpf: General/basics, asexuality, greysexuality, biology, Skype
Lea Plath: Genderfluidity
Lycunadari: Genderqueer and agendered
Eldest: General/basics, bisexuality, polyamory, pansexuality will Skype(voice if needed, no video)
HMS Sophia: Trans stuff (esp hormones)
Lix Lorn: General/basics
Eirala: Trans stuff (esp emotional issues), Skype(no voice or video, however)
Absol197: Gender identity issues
Warkitty: Academic/technical discussions
Lentrax: General/basics, depression, bullying
Wormwood74: Transgender legal issues, transgender outside contacts
Astrella: GSRM rights, feminism, trans stuff, Skype
Asteron Questar: Relationships, depression
Mystic Muse: Skype-y goodness.
Socratov: Skype-ness
Chess435: Skype
Irish Musician: PM, Rants/Venting
Metditto: PM/Skype for L, T, GQ, BDSM(Off-thread or Spoiler Triggered), demisexual, feminism, therapy, depression, dissociative identities
inuyasha: Shoulder on which to cry, someone to listen
Partysan: PM/Skype, polyamory, pansexuality, BDSM(Off-thread or Spoiler Triggered), Rants/Venting
TaiLiu: General Transgender information, transphobia.
Enrico Dandolo (Caroline) : Trans stuff, mental health, feminism, asexuality, hugs. PM first, Skype chat if asked.
Kesnit: Trans stuff (FtM), legal issues.
Some people are also willing to talk off-board, through Skype or email or other means; this is especially useful if your question involves board-forbidden topics such as religion or politics. Also, we can't (and ethically shouldn't!) give medical advice. If you need medical advice, please see a professional!
And as a parting note, I will say that even though moderators do not read PMs, they are still part of the forum and still subject to forums rules. Non-allowed topics and discussion should NOT be conducted via PM.
Previous Incarnations
Like the Glorious and Unconquered Sun, we have risen, lived, died, and risen anew, with many faces, many voices, many hearts. In this past, much can be found, both good, and bad, should one be brave or perhaps, foolish, enough to seek it.
Spoiler: Past Threads
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Webcomics that touch on... Well, everything related to the thread.
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Venus Envy. Long dead webcomic. The creator has chosen not to continue it and move forward in life.
Rain. A story of a MtF girl in high school.
Khaos Komix.As the creator puts it(from his site): "A complete GLBTWTFBBQ comic about gender and sexuality. (Trigger warnings for EVERYTHING and nothing is safe for work.)"
Always Raining Here. "Adrian is heartsick, Carter is horny. This is a story about their misadventures as awkward teenagers as they fumble through unrequited romances."
Tripping over you.An awkward blind date leads to better options.
Questionable Content. The LGBTA characters are well done, and not stereotypes.
What's normal anyway. "What’s Normal Anyway? is a comic that discusses the trans male experience through the story of Mel, who takes the big risk of being himself and transitioning from female to male."
Princess. A webcomic.
Twokinds. Keveak: "It generally portrays GRSM matters positively and is quite a nice tale overall."
Misfile The Rose Dragon: "Ash is a young boy who, as a result of a screw-up in Heaven, gets stuck in a girl's body in a life he doesn't recognize, and has to deal with the changes and challenges of his new body while trying to get back his old life. Supernatural hijinks and car racing are involved."
I know I missed a few webcomics, and if anyone finds more, feel free to PM them to me with a brief description, and I will add them.
The Brand New LGBTA Arts & Crafts Thread!
LGBTAIitp # 49: Please check all baggage before boarding the Rainbow Rail Road
