Who in their right mind built wall clocks that ticked?
I believe the original clocks ticked from the mechanical motion of the gears inside. It was not done intentionally.
"Yessir," she said quietly.
Is “Yessir” just her speaking rapidly, or is this a typo?
"You work in a clerical position," her manager said with a too-friendly smile. "Thought shouldn't be involved."
Oh, no. A male boss just told her female employee that her job is not to think.
Quick! Hide this from Tumblr! Don’t let them see it. We can’t survive the storm!
Clocking out failed to bring any satisfaction.
Detroit in autumn wasn't the best place to be
Just being honest here, but I found the pacing about jarring. A lot happened within the following paragraph that I kept backtracking to figure out where I am and what’s going on.
The would-be criminal stared silently at the blade, weighing his options.
To be, or not to be?
I've got plenty of money, it's not a trouble to share some.
Where’d she get so much money? I thought she was a secretary, and they don’t get paid that much.
The door was locked - not a big deal, given the whole 'keys' concept.
2B, or not 2B?
oh hell, was he so out of it that he was watching The 700 Club?
None but the dead can find peace in “The 700 Club”.
The blonde sat down on the couch next to his feet and looked over.
You keep calling her “The Blonde”. Is there significance in reinforcing our knowledge of her hair color, or is her full name Natty Blonde?
Conclusion: Not bad. It was entertaining, and I would like to see what happens next if you plan on turning this into a series.
Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting
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