Hi all

Like all DMs, I have my strength and weaknesses, but it happens that my biggest weakness is something that causes arguments and (sometimes) costs me a campaign. I've had it explained to me by my players that I don't enable them. I'm far more interested in the stuff that I come up with for a game than what the players create or work towards. As a result they ask me for stuff, and I either downplay it or need to be convinced to give it to them (usually after some irritation).

One of my players told me something that really stuck. I see the relationship between my plot and their desires in terms of US and ME. If they want to pursue their personal plots in addition to what I give them, I tend to consider it less important (and thus something to be endured) to what I consider the "main plot". Even when I DO make stuff people ask for, I don't devote enough time to it for a player to be satisfied. Simply put, I think that i'm working FOR or AGAINST the player, when I should be working WITH them.

That being the case, what's the best way for me to buck these tendencies of mine? I've been told discussion with players is key, working with them to make what they want. But I was curious what advice you guys could provide.

Thanks in advance!