Is there a word for fake words?

[Fiery Diamond]

I think English should use a spelling closer to pronunciation:P
How much > haw mac?
Do you need help? > Du yu niid help?
I'm so tired! > Ay'm so taỳd!
I hate this idea > Ay heyt dhis aydì.
Don't you have anything better to do than trying to ruin English spelling? > Down'c iu hev enithin bett´r cu du dhen crayin cu ruuin Inglish spellin?
This is actually funnier than it seems. > Dhis is ecùli fannìr dhen it siims.
One last sentence. > Wan last sent´ns.

The largest problems I see:
the vowels in much and last are actually different, although quite close (ʌ vs ɑ).
there are different sounds to be shown as e (æ and e, for example).
Accents for ə aren't really handy.
The difference between n and ng isn't shown.

Gah! It BURNS!

Actually, there are even bigger problems than the ones you posit. The most important one, obviously, is that not everyone pronounces the words the same way. There are quite a few of your examples that are wildly different from how I say them. The second one is that for someone who only speaks English and doesn't know IPA, all those accent marks are simply confusing rather than clarifying. I didn't even know you could put one over a "y."

My attempt at showing how I pronounce them (without so much as guessing at IPA - this means no ""c" means the sound that starts the word "chair"" weirdness):

key for vowels (and combo letters):

ch=chair
th=thing
TH=this
ng=thing
sh=share
a=lad
ah=father
u=lute
uh=touch
i=deed
ih=lid
e=bed
ai=side
ay=say
o=so

a "-r" means the r sound gets its own syllable

How much? > Haw muhch?
Do you need help? > Du yu nid help?
I'm so tired! > Ai'm so tai-rd.
I hate this idea > Ai hayt THihs aidiuh.
Don't you have anything better to do than trying to ruin English spelling? > Don' chyu hav enithihng bed-r duh du THn chraiihng t ruihn Ihngglihsh spelihng?
This is actually funnier than it seems. > THihs ihz akshli fuhni-r THn iht simz.
One last sentence. > Wuhn last sentns



With regard to Wade-Giles: it also has the issue of requiring one to look up how every letter is supposed to be pronounced before you can use it - the Tao, anyone? No ordinary American is going to see that and think even for a second that's anything other than the "T" from "tea" followed by the vowel sound in "cow" unless they've been taught otherwise.