D&D Philosophy One-Liners

[dangerprawn]

I was sitting in class the other day, the prof talking about Galileo and Hobbes, and he summed up Hobbes thoughts on civil government with the quip: "Rocks fall, everyone forms civil societies!", the rocks falling bit relating to how Hobbes adapted the principle of inertia to politics.

The nearness of it to the standard d&d line, "Rocks fall, everyone dies." had me cracking up. Course, no one else in the class knew what I was laughing about. But that's not so uncommon.

Anyway.

It got me thinking about other philosophers and how their thoughts or ideas could be summed up into one line catchphrases related to d&d. Yes, not even the Copernican revolution can keep my mind from d&d, apparently.

Here's a few I've thought of:

Nietzsche: "Alignments are for slaves."

Socrates: "Use True Seeing to bypass the illusions of the world."

Hegel: "The Spirit of the World is my shapeshifting animal companion."

Heraklitus*: "Everything is a Fire elemental in a different form."

Parmenides: "Only with Divine Favor will you walk the Way of Truth."

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I suppose they wouldn't be funny unless you understand the particular philosopher. Then again, they might not be funny regardless.

*Different spelling to bypass the censor.

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And I just thought of one for Star Trek:

Nietzsche/Scotty: "She's got no will to power, Cap'n!"